Pregnant after a miscarriage, as the bumps get bigger we get braver, 1st,2nd or 3rd trimester, reasurance and hand holding aplenty!

[StateofConfusion]

Before the first thread fills and locks a 2nd thread for us getting braver!

Yay sundae great news x

Big congratulations sundae, that's fab news! x

sundae....that's wonderful news.

Great news sundae :)

Fab news sundae, so pleased for you. Day by day you will gain confidence and start to relax and enjoy feeling your bubba move about and poke her feet out and about. X

I am not enjoying the continuing perma heartburn though!

I've only had brief bouts of horrid heartburn this time, despite my horrendous eating habbits, when I get it its awful, but its usually just one day, or couple of evenings!

Had a horrible dream last night, lo was delivered to early (32wks, despite me being 33+3 lol) and taken to nicu, no one could tell me what was going on, I ended up trying to text my mum who said he was 8lb 1 and doing well. I woke up so so confused.

So if it is a boy who's 8lb 1 I will be a bit freaked out haha!

Great news Sundae!

Now it is my turn to panic... I keep thinking that I am no longer pregnant. I have a splitting headache but no pregnancy symptoms. My bump seems smaller. I only occasionally think that I might, possibly feel movement and tgen I think it is my inagination. I am properly paranoid. My next appointment is scheduled for my birthday (next Tuesday) so I have requested a later date but have not heard back. I just cannot face the bad news on my birthday...

Ack! I promised myself that I would take it one day at a time but how is that even possible?!? I am trying to decide if I am better off waiting or going in to be seen? I have no time for medical management this week and I dread a d&e.

Dd2 has pinworms and had me up all night. I am busy washing everything and trying not to flip. Dh asked if I could take Ovex and I replied, "Not this week." I suspect that by this time next week I will be on the gyne ward again...

Sorry for the wobble. I don't expect anyone to say anything that will reassure me but it would be nice to be wrong and look back in a few weeks and smile at my paranoia. (18+3)

Posting before I change my mind...

cad you are so NOT alone, I still explain movements away and convince myself its all gone wrong. Its self preservation I think. Just think you are 6wks away from viability! There is a high chance that baby is just fine and at 18wks many don't feel any movement. Keep your chin up and if your really worried drink a really cold coke/lucozade and lie on your left hand side a while, that gets them wriggling! X

Oh Cad, you poor thing, I was so sure I was going to be dealing with a loss today I nearly cancelled all my appointments!

I don't feel pregnant now apart from seeing my bump, that changes depending where she is laying, sometimes big sometimes small, today I am wearing a pre-preg skirt!

Try not to worry, I realise now that all the time spent worrying was time I could have been enjoying blissful ignorance and that there is enough time to worry in the waiting room for the scan!

Hopefully everything is just as it should be, try not to worry.

Thank you State and Sundae. I am at ballet class with dd2 and one of the other mums has a 1 week old. She is absolutely beautiful. Cannot imagine having similar in 21 weeks...

Having found out at scans about MMCs makes the paranoia inevitable but I do have less than a 50% success rate. =( I feel foolish for even being in this position.

I have an answer from the consultant:
In reference to your request, we regret to inform you that Dr. is FULLY booked in November and is having a long vacation starting November 22 until January next year (2013). We cannot change your appointment to another date this month.

Would you like to consult with another doctor?

That is a very good question... Blah!

Oh cad that is a pita. My usual consultant was unavailable at my scan last week and the person I got in their place didn't even know I'd had children, then only found one in my notes. I ended up pointing out dd, and the mcs.
I left feeling like I'd wasted 30minutes of my time, utterly pointless apt.
I can only hope my consultants there on the 29th as that's
my csection prep appointment, choosing a date, signing etc.

Even though I have nearly everything sorted and I'm off to but the carseat this weekend I can't quite imagine this small person joining our family next month, I'm excited but its strange, I can't explain it!

Thanks again state. I am sorry that you have had similar experiences. At my 12 week scan the consultant asked if it was out fist baby. My notes were there, I am 40, he ran the wand over my c-section scar... Sometimes I wonder why I bother answering every question in detail.

I haven't replied to the email... I am unfamiliar with the system here (Thailand) but I am slightly surprised that the consultant will be away for so long and didn't mention it at my initial appointment. I gues thatif by some miracle I am still pgI will need to see someone else in December and January anyhow so I may as well switch now. I just cannot bear the thought of finding no heartbeat on my birthday.

Its not really good enough is it, when they have our notes in front of them, I'm in the UK so no idea how it all works in thailand, I'd possibly do the same, switch now and hope for some continuity of care. In the meantime try and relax I'm a sure you lo is fine xxx

Can I just bob in & ask how everyone got through their first 12 weeks please? I am breaking down in tears..so scared something will go wrong again & can't stand the thought of feeling this way for another 7+ weeks.
Doctors don't seem concerned or share my concern about wanting an early scan & DH says we're not paying money for a private scan. I know he is scared too but is trying to be positive. Just trying to pretend its not happening in a way which feels wrong

Wifey I am with you completely on this, I am 11 weeks, but i have to say having had 2 scans has really helped me feel a bit better about it after 3 consecutive miscarriages all at 6-8 weeks so passing this point was a real goal for me. I have only just accepted this is actualy real but won't let myself or anyone else start on plans etc. hoping to feel better past 12 weeks! Must say the 10 week scan was a really important milestone for me as well as i know how much statistically my chances improved with this.
Best of luck and congrats on pregnancy!!

Sorry for your loss Alpha...& congratulations on your pregnancy.
We had a MMC & I had no indication at all til our 12 week scan..although we saw our baby at 6+ weeks with a little heartbeat.
It doesn't feel like my doctors are listening to how concerned I am & just keep saying I could always pay for a scan..which is true I suppose..but DH keeps saying we won't need it & to stop worrying. His way of burying his head in the sand & being positive.

Wifey have you phoned you EPU, they were really helpful with me.

They said I would need a doctors authorisation for an early scan, would need to be over 6 weeks & have experienced pain or bleeding.
I do have aches but not pain. I am only 5 weeks. They didn't seem that helpful...but I guess they deal with women in these situations all the time sadly.
I think I'm wanting a doctor or EPU staff to say 'I understand, let's settle your mind with a scan' but they aren't doing which is frustrating me. sorry...such a self-indulgent & spoilt sounding post. Just so anxious.

Wifey it is none of those things and I completely understand you anxiety. I found them really helpful but I think I ticked a new box after my 3rd miscarriage as felt no-one took me seriously before that. and also I did have to wait until after 6 weeks, had a 7 week scan and a 10 week scan.
PM me of always come on here if you want hand holding, it is such a stressful and worrying time and seems to take an age for the weeks to pass! x

Alpha....that is really kind. Thank you so much.

I totally understand, I desperately wanted someone (health prof) to say that too, but they never did. I know they deal with this (and worse) every day but it's so very awful at that moment in time for you. I too convinced myself that I'd lost the baby several times due to loss of symptoms but here we are at 34 weeks today! I say you must do whatever it takes to get through the coming weeks, distract yourself if you can, cry, rant on here, allow yourself to feel what you feel - you don't choose to be this upset and worried so beating yourself will only make you feel worse. Day by day (or minute by minute some days) you will get closer to the reassurance you need. Big hugs. X

Hiya wifey and alpha in all honesty the first trimester was torture, I was so low and scared I would sit in my own little world full of fear and misery, I had a scan at 10wks and it lifted slightly, then another at 12 (as baby had refused to be measured properly) and then I was more normal, I didn't feel in anyway positive until I felt movements but even now the fear can grip me.

This may sound awful but if your really struggling, wait until your 7+ wks and tell a small white lie and get yourself a scan at epu. My dp was the same, I did agree in hindsight paying for bad news would sting!

Anyway hold tight and keep busy if you can but not too busy, this thread has a high sucess rate, so be prepared to get fat :)

WLmum thank you so much. It does feel sometime like I'm taking each minute at a time.
State thank you. DH has just said that if it puts my mind at rest..a little white lie at about 9-10 weeks to get a scan wouldn't hurt. (We were told our baby stopped growing 7-8 weeks) so want to get to 9-10 before I go. We're 12 weeks around Xmas so hoping we will get a scan about 11 weeks.
You all are so kind

hi ladies, sorry it's been so long since I checked in.... I have been lurking on my phone though.

wifey and alpha my god, my first trimester was a nightmare of anxiety. Things have got better, but I am still very anxious. So much so I am on a waiting list to see a counsellor, though I suspect that I'll still be waiting when the baby comes! I have had too many scans to count, certainly 3-4 by the time I'd had my 12 week one. Now at the other end of my pregnancy (31 + 4) I am having scans every 2 weeks as baby's growth seems to have slowed. So the worrying is still there, only different. I totally agree with state , tell a couple of white lies to get extra scans at EPU, and keep as busy as you can manage to keep your mind off things.

wifey, if you can get to 7 weeks before you get a scan, if all is well it will offer you more reassurance than an earlier one. Even if your dates are a bit out you are almost certain to see a heart beat at 7 weeks, and earlier and if your dates are a few days out you might end up needlessly worried. I did resist the urge for a private scan, and found that EPU were very happy to offer a "reassurance"scan. Try calling yours directly.

sundae fab news... and you are half way there. Wahay!

cad hang on in there... you are at that funny stage where the sickness has eased, the 1st trimester tiredness is largely gone and the 3rd trimester exhaustion is yet to arrive, baby's movements are a bit indistinct still, some of the bump is bloating so varies a bit. So many reasons why you can feel less pregnant at this stage than at any other stage of your pregnancy.

Still umming and ahhing over vbac vs elcs. But as I said before my last growth scan suggested that baby has slowed down a bit, so I might get no choice if he needs to come early. My parents have been stressing me out by threatening to go away to india or south africa in a couple of weeks for a couple of weeks. that could mean that they are the other side of the world just when I need them to help with DS if baby has to come early. Fortunately they have decided to go to paris for a week instead, which I am much more comfortable with! My PIL would still be around if my parents were away, but my relationship with them is a whole other thread! Anyway, I'm 5 weeks 3 days from officially being full term, and I've got plenty of friends who have had babies at 35 weeks with absolutely no consequences (including baby not needing to be in SCBU), so I feel more confident by the day. Going to pack my hospital bag this weekend: need to get the new born baby clothes out of the loft and wash them!