Due in October -part 3

[HaggisNeepsTatties]

The third instalment as we're a talkative bunch!

Maybe call NHS Direct? Sorry - not sure what else to suggest but they should be able to advise.

good luck. hugs

Thanks londonlivvy. I've calmed down a bit now but I think I'll call the midwife at lunch time to make sure. It doesy't help that my DH's gran is ill and we are on edge waiting for a call to rush over. I just feel a bit stressed in general today.

squid I haven't had a scan yet. My booking appointment is today so I should get a date soon.

HeeHeeHee you should call your MW asap as she will be able to advise or get you in for a scan. The earlier you call, the better the chance of being seen today.

try not to worry heehee. My doctor was really reassuring yesterday when I saw her about my cramp worries. Said it is v common and that I would be amazed at how many people bleed and have cramps in the first trimester and then have totally normal pregnancies. Big hugs x

Squid I havent had a scan yet either, don't worry! Mine should hopefully come through the post this week.... Try not to worry HeeHee I'm having cramps too. Its normal :) x

try not to worry heehee. My doctor was really reassuring yesterday when I saw her about my cramp worries. Said it is v common and that I would be amazed at how many people bleed and have cramps in the first trimester and then have totally normal pregnancies. Big hugs x

Oh gosh heehee - like everyone else says, more likely to be nothing than something. Hold tight.

From the world of cheerful distractions, I found this earlier today - it made me laugh, a lot! But it is a joke at our (pregnant women's) expense, so, might not be for everyone

It's two girls singing a comedy song. Here's a clue: the title of the song is 'pregnant women are smug' (Guilty! And probably getting worse! )

I still haven't got a scan date! Had my booking in appointment a week ago. I'm 9 weeks, and am worried about how late this scan's going to be...I'm not sure I can wait until 14 weeks to tell everyone!

Heehee maybe phone your GP. I eventually found out, after lots of to-ing and fro-ing, that I needed to call my GP to get referred to the EPU for a scan. The procedure is probably different in different areas, but I rang my GP from work, she called me back at work to discuss my symptoms, and booked me in without seeing me. For me personally, that's the only thing that reassured me. Fingers crossed for you.

Hee hee. Yes, call your midwife. They can also probably offer some reassurance. Can youbook the rest of the day off and go home to rest with your feet up?

WIell had my first official meltdown last night. After the debaucle at work yesterday, I felt real low, realizing that even though I was really proud of this new job as the deans assistant.. I'm now just another receptionist, which is what I used to do.. So no real job growth there. Feel like a failure at 30. Thought I missed the birthday gloom this year, happy about job and newly preggo, but I was wrong.

S iooooo was in a grumpy foul mood by the end of day. I have a 45 min drive home and there was ice rain, the kind that freezes on the windshield instantly. So I had to have the defrost cranked on full and blowing up at my face so that I could see. I was so uncomfortable and hot. Doesn't help that I have also been having hot flashes in my head and face making things worse.

so I get in the door and dh had made me diner. I say thank you, and made my plate then explained that I had a bad day and was going to be antisocial and sit in the other room, but of course he follows me in. I ask him to leave so he sits down on the couch with me. To which I reply I don't want to be the hormonal pregnant lady, please let me be. So he moves in for a hug and I blubber I DON'T WANT TO CRY SO PLEASE GO AWAY, but by the end of that sentence it was a full blown wail with no return. Poor dh. He sat and hugged me and rubbed my back, then I nappecd off and on the rest of the evening on tne couch. Sigh [exhausted emoticon]

Squid - I haven't had a scan - nor seen a doctor or a midwife nor had any kind of booking appointment. I hope to get one on the 23rd March before I head back to Norway from the UK. I will beg my nice GP (or go private last resort but I'm hoping with my ripe & notable collection of fibroids they'll feel the pity :)). I'll be just about 11 weeks (by my dates).

Zara1984 - do NOT envy you that journey. I find salty crackers helpful. Any plain carby snack really. Little & often. A friend of mine swears by Rich Tea.

heehee - I'm not saying don't worry but there are lots of reasons to have crampy feelings. I've had mild achey ones ever since conception (now 8+3) and usually they have disappeared after bowel movements (or good farts ). Also I have fibroids of course which cause mild achey pain and I'm not suggesting you have those but there are lots of causes of achey pain down there. But you should check it out for your peace of mind.

Today I'm mostly feeling down about being a stepmum to these 2 Norwegian girls approaching teenage (well, one of them seems firmly there already). DP just will not exercise any discipline or rules and says if I insist on them, he will tell the girls they are 'my' rules (so of course I will be the wicked, hated stepmother). It's a very depressing environment for me to think of bringing a new baby into. I try not to worry about it but he left them in my care today and so far it's a been a total nightmare. There are language difficulties too. And I worry that DP & my ideas about parenting are at opposite ends of the pole. This is a recipe for disaster isn't it?

Fjiord,I'm sure u & ur DP will be just fine when it comes to ur tiddler arriving :-)

I've not had a scan yet either ladies,i have to wait til April 5th & will see my mw for first time this coming Monday,so am sure it will all seem a bit more real by then although I feel like shite alot of the time!! I have discovered that rich tea biccys & water before I get out of bed seems to help with the ms have also been wearing sickness bands through the day which help also :-)

Beeblebear - sorry, took so long to write my post I didn't see yours. Poor you . I really hope you are able to take matters up with work. It's hardly surprising you're totally demoralised about it and if they have done what it effectively seems like they have, it's unlawful. Jobs can be so crap sometimes. I had a really bad experience and was treated horribly when I came back after 2 months off for severe stress and having to look after my post-stroke dad & disabled mum alone. I couldn't do anything about it as they respected my job rights as far as employment law was concerned but I was just personally treated horribly and I think, in these situations, the only thing you can have some control over is at least your employment rights. I do hope the situation gets better for you. It's horrible to be hormonal & going through this.

Yes, beeblebear, fjordmor is right. But do mind your rights, do talk to HR and do talk to the union. FWIW, I only know what constructive dismissal is because a former boss tried to do it to me year before last (the cheeky beggar! I'm not not happy to say that the company collapsed like I said it would... but not totally unhappy, either )

It's not a race - career development is more of a jagged spiky stock-market type chart than a nice straight up-pointing line.

are you ok heehee? Have you spoken to your midwife? Mine was really understanding. What are your cramps like? Mine are like contractions which is why I am so worried. So relieved they aren't making me wait too long for a scan. I hope you are getting some support and re-assurance. X

Hello lovely ladies! So delighted the board is back to sweetness and light - hurrah!

twolittlemonkeys hope you are okay xo

midgetm how did the interview go? Hope it went well! x

marie hang in there with the sickness - sending sympathy! :) Also kiwis are meant to be good - and of course my tried and tested hot water and a quarter of a lemon! x

heehee hope you got sorted or at least got some info from midwife etc.

bettybat and yompingjo I think it's pretty natural to feel a bit freaked out. It hasn't hit me too much yet (apart from mini meltdown on Sat after seeing the bean for first time - suddenly became real!) but I know it will down the line. At the end of the day it is a huge life change so it's only natural to freak a bit. And betty I read something recently similar to what bella wrote (thanks bella!) about the whole winter baby thing - how nice it can be to hibernate when baby is very tiny and going out is a faff, easy to transport them for Xmas etc etc - PLUS as Spring arrives they are getting a bit more sturdy and engaged with everything! :)

londonlivvy sympathy on the sickness and the friend front. I've been v fortunate avoiding sickness but have real dilemma over when to tell close friend who has been trying for ages, having horrible tests etc. Keep finding a reason to put it off ("Will just wait to scan..." etc etc).

Right, sorry if I have left anyone out, can't keep up with all the excitement now that I am back to work! :o

Bugger it!! Just wrote a long message, someone called me and then i lost it!

Ah well start again!

Hee hee try not to worry. If the bleeding gets heavier and increased pain ring your MW. Rest and distraction might help take your mind off it, easier said than done though I know!

Beeble, your day sounded so bad I feel for you I really do. I know your going to hate me but can you try and flip the negatives into positives? I try to do it all the time and feel much much better. For example, I didnt get the job I wanted when I gave birth to Dd, and i was gutted! Really sad. But people made me realise it wasn't all bad. I had less responsibility, my current job didn't change= less stress and the person they chose was an airhead (and at the time, I was like, she will never make it! Lol). I also had a lovely daughter, a fantastic husband who cared for me and it all made me feel better. I hope you can find a way of seeing any positives too.

Dameflat I read your post about ds not sleeping and it took me back to when my Dd gave me the same probs! Is he in a bed? Can he get out of his room? I did the suppernanny thing ( very hard but so worth it) and now she is a very good girl going to bed. I can give you some tips if you like.

Fjordmor, the teenage step daughter seems really tough. I have absolutely no experience in this situation but do nurse adolescents from time to time, so understand the challenge. Do you feel you should talk to your DH to ask for more support, it seems really unfair to make you out to be like you said the horrid step mum! Discipline is so important, and teenagers just want control. Does the suppernanny do teenage tips too?

Marie x

Hi everyone, thanks so much for your lovely messages. The cramps went away and I've had no more bleeding since this morning. I'm just having a rubbish day in many ways and I panicked. When I get home I'm going to ring the midwife as fortunately they are available until 8pm and hopefully they will put my mind at rest.
Beeblebear I hope your work situation improves.
YompingJo I hope you are feeling better. I felt so low for the first few weeks but I have slowly come out of it.
Sorry to those I have missed. I'm going to have a proper catchup of the thread tonight.

I have just spoken to the EPU and don't feel very reassured. I explained my symptoms and they said they won't see me based on that but to call back if it gets worse. She said it could be nothing or could be the start of a miscarriage :(

I think I need a curry and an early night.

Oh HeeHee thats the complete opposite of reassurance,i hope it doesnt get u down :-) the idea of a curry & an early night sounds like a lovely plan! Put ur feet up for the rest of the night & try to relax & be good to yourself x

Heehee that kind of attitude makes me really angry. I'm sorry your EPU is so useless Is there anyway you can rest over the next few days? Call in sick at work and keep your feet up?

marie thanks for the offer. DS is 16m and still in a cot. The problem tends to be that he still has a dummy (arrgghhh, I know....I always said he wouldn't but it's always more complicated than that), loses it in the night etc etc. The usual. And we got one of those sleepy tot bunnies you can attach dummies to, but the only dummy he'll take has nothing to loop it through. Not sure when or how to get rid of the dummy, but I'm certainly not feeling brave enough yet! He goes down to sleep brilliantly with it, so I'm dreading the whole prospect of de-dummying!

Fjordmor what a nightmare with the teenagers and your DP. Is there anyway of making him see how unfair his behaviour is, or of highlighting the problems your facing so he can sympathise more? It seems a bit...unreasonable to me.

hi girls. so sorry to hear that you all seem to be having trouble. I also apologise as I have had a rubbish day (although nothing is PG Related so please feel free to ignore all this!!) I just need to rant!!!
Pregnancy hormones have WELL AND TRULY kicked in today. First I go and do some nice shopping, treat myself, see a friend for coffee, spend a fortune... Then find a £50 fine on my car because I've overstayed the parking limit!!!!!! And I had to pay it to get out of the car park :( Then I try to put my new CD in my radio in my car, and the stereo decides to die on me completely, not work at all. Then my radio won't tune in!! Then i stop at the pub to meet DP and completely break down. I don't like hormones :( Then my poor mother rings me in the midst of my break down and got the brunt of it all... Poor poor woman. Still feeling like I could sleep for a week also.

I hope everyone has a better day tomorrow. Sorry for the rant!!!
Lots of love and hugs to you all x

Dameflat, my 18mo old never took to the dummy but I have heard the advice to drop several of them around the cot - hard to do if he only likes a particular 1...

Fjordmor - I saw on an episode of Phil onetime that teenagers cannot accept instruction from a new parent beyond a certain age. Basically if you are not the person who fed and cared for them as an infant it is not their choice, it is in their DNA that they cannot accept your standards. The logic struck me. Anyway his advice to the stepparent was to support the parent. By that advice their father has to set the standard. If that standard is unacceptable to you, I think, you need to resolve with him. Will not be at all offended if you put my advice from Phil in your mental trash can.

I had my scan this morning - panicked yesterday after negitive Tesco EPT. Anyway, very kind MW, turned screen away saying give me a minute to see. Anyway she quickly turned it around - All was as it should be! I started crying with relief. She has had 2 babies, she told me she worried all the way through her pregnancies. Anyway she said she would be scanning all day today and would expect to have bad news for some. I felt like a hypocondriac, wasting her time. I showed my husband the EPT last night and said 'Is that a line to you?' He said 'no' but now I feel a bit ashamed that I worried so much.

I am 9 +4, 45yrs and I've been scanned twice

Evening all,

Only had time to scan the boards but thanks so much for your well wishes today. made it through the interview without farting, puking or fainting so all in all I think it went as well as can be expected. So many well wishes from you all makes a girl feel really special.

HeHe curry will sort you out. I can't tell you for sure, nothing but a scan will give you answers but I can tell you based on my experiences of m/c what you are describing does not sound like one. Once the cramps start they tend to not stop for a bit and blood is not on poohing/wiping but more steady. I know it is easier said than done but rest and try and take your mind of it. Only time will tell so do your best to be kind to yourself.

Fjordmor your stepsituation sounds a flaming nightmare but good things often come with baggage when you get to a certain age (not sure what age you are so may be tarring you with my brush there....). However differences in raising your own bean will probably need to be tackled early on. Babies are like animals - they can smell division a mile off!

lisbethsopposit glad you got some reassurance - the test must have been a bit rubbish but glad you got to the bottom of it.

For all you ladies who have had a rubbish day - hugs and tomorrow is a new day for us to be stropy and hormonal in.But it will be a better day.

Only just got in with my take away currry. Appointment with the big miscarriage Professor tomorrow. Guessing they will scan me before they waste any of the Profs time on me. Worrying absence of symptoms today but I think that is beacuse I have been so stressed and busy. I will be devastated to get bad news again tomorrow. A girl can only handle so many knockbacks but trying to remian positive and stoic for now. Best go and feed my face x

Heehee I've been googling away and I'm at a bit of a loss as to why bleeding and cramping don't qualify you for a scan.
Do you have the name of the MW that spoke to you? If it could possibly be the start of a MC, then is it not the purpose of the EPU to scan you to rule this out? I know they can't scan every worried mum, but you have symptoms. I had direct access to the EPU but could your GP help?