Pregnancy post mc: Totally's grads continued part 8

[tiggersreturn]

new thread!!

Ps Lara being at 16 weeks is v nervewracking-hang in there!!

of owls 31 week check, i dont get seen again til 36 weeks

Really? I get a 34 week check as well. Although to be fair I've had a check about every 2 weeks on average the whole way through due to a happy combination of extreme paranoia on my part and a tolerant MW who runs a drop in clinic on the one day a week I don't have to be at work

Lara you may think you have snuck out again but I shall be ready and waiting to tie your shoelaces together when you reappear! Buahahahaha. I also found the bit between 16 and 20 weeks very unnerving due to total absence of symptoms and long gaps between medical checks, it's a very weird time after all the grottiness up to 12 weeks.

Coconuts good to see you've made it over :) I remember you from another thread I think, tis nice to see you. It's bound to take a while, I'm only just looking at baby stuff in a 'planning' kind of way. What did you do with the clothes?
Cep so great to see you over :) I hope the trampoline days are over! Thanks for the list my dates are spot on :)
apples I'm thinking of you, am sure miniapples has a plan. I was told the other day I just had to accept I'm not in charge - bump is. Very unnerving indeed
Pink sorry you're having such a rough time, but looks like they're taking it seriously and you're getting all the right help. Completely understand your MW reasoning there weren't really any doulas in my area and free so it's worth a thought if I can convince dh
Izzy an important milestone reached it sounds like, each one makes me a little more positive :)
Crochet I hope you got the sweep and things get moving over the weekend
Owl good to hear that owlet is living up to usual naughty standards kicking dr and good another week is reached, I think the same thing

I think I may have had a bug, starting to feel better and MW not worried. Pink I think you're right about the tiredness brining ms on. I had my 28 appointment on Thursday, I measured 28cm but the MW thinks it may have been 29 if she could have got miniorange to move into the middle a bit more instead of being nestled in my right side :) dh is going away for a week so I'm trying to be brave

Hi orange no, thankfully no more bounces on my stomach. I'm glad you're starting to feel better.

owl i get an extra 2 scans cause i'm so big, they worry baby will be big as well. ds wasn't, he was only 7.2 but i don't mind getting extra views.

i've got a really busy day today is dss's birthday celebrations and we're out all day. I'm feeling really weird, my head feels funny and i'm feeling very dizzy...this does not bode for a good day out.

Morning all

Coconut I'm so sorry you had the hassle of being sent from pillar to post re getting your jab, but I'm glad they pulled their socks up when you went back in again. I'm completely with you on the jinxing thing - although bear in mind that 2nd hand stuff comes complete with its own thrift fairies who beat off the jinx pixies . Even so, I've stored all the stuff we've been given out of the house.

Fab scan news Izzy

How are you feeling Pink? I have Brian in residence at the moment too - doesn't help that I'm having to write my own proposal paper for maternity cover - just when I need every mental capacity I'm having to deal with figures and tendering briefs! Argh.

Very interesting chat about IM or doulas. I'm not going down that route, but only because my preferred unit is so good. I may wish otherwise if I end up being transferred elsewhere.

Cep hope your dizzyness goes - I felt very 'waffy' yesterday, like the room was spinning when I shut my eyes. Ate plenty, so was wondering if iron levels may be low. Good excuse for a steak sandwich for lunch

OH wants to go to the local NCT sale this lunchtime.... Not for buying, just to see women scrapping over stuff , I feel its too soon to be buying so hopefully there'll be another sale a bit later in the summer....

orange They are still in the same place I just can't do it. I look at them and feel myself welling up.

Everyone who knows thinks I'm crazy but they just don't understand. They all keep saying it will be ok, but how do they know that. I'm just so used to being so negative, so when the inevitable happens I'm not disappointed. How do I turn it around?

cep hope your dizziness doesn't last long. I'm often dizzy first thing in the morning especially if we're busy getting ready to go out. I find a long sit down with a cold drink and something to eat like a banana often helps. Perhaps iron or blood sugar is just a little low today. Take it steady. And happy birthday to your dss :)

daisy I think I will definitely be storing the majority of things at someone elses house.

Only problem I have is that everyone in my immediate family smokes (I am v. anti-smoking) so I don't want to buy stuff, wash it all, and pack it off for safe keeping and have to wash it again upon it's return. I know it's very snobby and judgemental of me, but I used to smoke from the age of 13 to 18 and it disgusts me now. I think the smell is worse for an ex smoker than for someone who has never smoked. Anyway I don't want to offend anyone who may smoke so I'll shut up now I'll have to get some of those vaccuum pack things!

Have been thinking about the doula side of things and I think we'll be ok without one after my positive experience yesterday. My local LW has redeemed itself and DH is keen for it to be the two of us 'enjoying' the moment together

I was thinking of training as a MW/doula after I'm done making my own babies. Just need to do some research into qualifications/timescales etc.

nix my notes say the 31 week check is an extra for first time mums. Pretty weird, don't see why how many children you've had is relevant but anyway!

orange hope you're ok this week. Fab news on the measurements - that's spot on isn't it? Minipink likes the right hand side too

cep hope you have a lovely day out and the dizziness goes away. Where are you off to?

daisy I'm doing better I think thanks. I went for reflexology this week and sobbed my heart out to a complete stranger for an hour Bless her, she was very understanding and did some fantastic visualisation stuff with me to help me compartmentalise the worrying, it really helped. coconuts I've been having the same thing that I am naturally quite a pessimistic person. I think it's a protection mechanism so that if things go well you end up pleasantly surprised but I felt that I had to try and do something as I didn't want to look back at the pregnancy with regret that I spent the whole time worrying about something which (hopefully) didn't happen.

Cep hope you take it easy, they'll understand. I've been told orange juice is good as it gets into the blood quickly
Daisy you'll have to let me know what the sale is like, it was too early for me last time, and my next one is September I think
Coconuts I think when the time is right for you you'll turn it around, don't feel pressured, leave the bag there as long as you need to. My mil didn't buy anything for her first until after the birth and fil had to go rushing out for everything - they managed like that so can you if you have to, whatever helps you best emotionally. Totally understand the smoking thing, I think ex-smokers are worse than non-smokers - speaking as an ex-smoker! Smokers get used to the subtle smokey aroma that if you're not used to it is quite distinctive

Coconuts I wouldn't want to store my stuff anywhere smokey either. I've stashed it all in a chest (still in the wrappers or as I got it, none of it washed) and put things on top of the chest and I am pretending it isn't there The pushchair is in bits and some is in the loft but the frame is too big to go in the loft. Pink is right; this is just your brain's way of protecting you. Like many other things in pregnancy post-mc, my feeling is that whatever you need to do to make yourself feel as relaxed and comfortable as possible is the right thing to do. So if that involves hiding bags of stuff then so be it :)

BUT - I have found it helpful to just do one little positive thing at a time and not presssurise myself. E.g. bought a pair of baby socks. Did nothing else that week and put the socks away as soon as I got home. But the step of actually going into the shop and choosing them felt terrifying but helped me work my way up to bigger things and made it easier to deal with. I have now (very gradually) worked my way up to large objects that I can't hide in cupboards so I think it must be working :)

Pink I missed your post yesterday for some reason, I think it is (she didnt seem bothered) so not worrying. I just woke up to a tiny foot wedging itself under my right ribs, adorable. I'm glad the reflexology helped, sounds intriguing ... must look it up

I was given a Next voucher as a thank you for a favour, so went in and bought 3 sleepsuits Big step I just had to share. Staying team yellow too, since we've already come this far :)

Enough about me, I hope everyone's weekend is going well?

Apples I'm thinking of you, hopefully not too much longer now

Ok, deep breath, count to 3 and dive in....... to the grads thread!

Hello ladies - mind if I join you? Owl's Snacks are toooooo tempting and I seem to be creeping up the FO room thread a bit so thought I would hang around here and lap up all the valuable advice from those of you a bit further ahead than me. It's been really reassuring to read that this 14-20 week period is so anxiety-making. I had a real up and down week last week, culminating in a 16 week scan on Thursday which was hugely reassuring - everything seems to be spot on so far .

It's lovely so see so many familiar names doing so well and scans and dates progressing positively.

I think I'm a bit naive when it comes to the rhneg stuff and wonder if you could offer me some advice. I am rhneg and had bloods taken at 12 weeks which showed that I didn't need any anti-ds then. Also, had a tiny bit of spotting on fri eve after some fri afternoon sex (don't know if this is what caused it and have had nothing since). So, a couple of questions - 1) if sex causes bleeding / spotting, is this usually straight after sex or a few hours later 2) if rhneg, do you need to alert someone any time you have bleeing 3) how often are they supposed to take your bloods to check you don't need antids?

Please do have some freshly baked scones with clotted cream and jam as a big thank you

afternoon ladies on a very wet sunday.

hi WIW glad to see you here, although i'm afraid i can't help about the rh neg i haven't got a clue.

Thanks ladies for the wellwishing yesterday, it took a little while but did fade, thankfully. we did bowling, then lunch at frankie and bennys then as dh and i hadn't been up the spinnaker tower yet mil wanted to take us all up there. (we live nearby and ds lives in portsmouth dh just always refused to pay for it.) then went to see the new kung fu panda at the cinema. So a day at Gunwharf Quays. Thanks coconuts he said he had a great day, and his cousin slept over with us as well and he always enjoys that.

Have to admit i'm a bit jealous over people buying stuff, we have all the clothes (unless it's a girl) but we have all the first 3 months natural stuff. DH refuses to buy a new pushchair even though the one we have is tatty, bought second hand 2 years ago. The foot step thing is black taped together, really tasteful, but he won't even let me look at second hand ones on ebay that are going for about a fiver. I am thinking of buying a wrap thing though but have no idea where to start to decide what type i want.

coconuts can't you ask them to smoke outside?

WIW - I am RhNeg and had a post coital bleed Weds night. Had to go in for an antid Friday morning. You have a 72 hour window from the time of the bleed to get your antid so get thee to the labour ward/AAU. You'll just have a normal antenatal check, plus possibly a cervical check and swab and the jab. You'll need your routine antid at 28 weeks. They say that any type of bleed/spotting needs an antid. It's a bit of a pain in the arse but best to be safe than sorry just incase there is any hidden blood inside your womb.

Cep - I don't live with the smokers, would be rude to ask people to smoke outside of their own home just cuz I want to borrow a drawer/cupboard!

I had a breakthrough ladies. I looked in The Bag. Threw alot of stuff away that was a bit stained but there were a few items that were brand new so have kept - 2 newborn hats, 5 nb vests, 5 nb sleepsuits, a nb coat and a little velour over jacket thing. DD was 9lb 3 1/2oz so I don't think I'll need much newborn stuff. Have stuffed it all in a drawer under the bed and intend not to look at it again until right at the end, but am still proud of myself :)

Oh and WIW, sex doesn't always cause immediate spotting, had some at 12 weeks and it wasn't until the next morning. You wouldn't have needed antid at 12 weeks as your body does not produce antibodies before 12 weeks. So yes you need to alert them everytime you have spotting and they don't routinely check it until 28 weeks, unless you do go in with spotting. They took some blood from me to double check.

They are trying to develop a test where they can tell the baby's blood group from a sample of the mother's blood which will be great. I had four antids with DD and she is RhNeg too so I didn't even need them in the end.

So your routine one is at 28 weeks and you'll not need another until baby is born, if baby is positive blood group.

HTH :)

coconuts ah no, it would be a teensy bit rude if you don't live with them.

Ladies, can i ask your opinion? for those of you who have dc's already, did any of you use slings or wraps? Can i ask your thoughts on them what you thought of them, did you regret any of them. I've been having a look at this and it has been very helpful, i'm liking the look of either ring sling or mei tai, but have a couple of questions. can you put new borns in the cradle hold or does it have to be tummy2tummy in which case when can they go in at cradle? The clips seem to show 6 weeks, before then they do the t2t. The mei tai they only show from 3months+ so can you use it before then. Any advice would be great. Thanks

Glad the sickness has passed orange...here's hoping it doesn't come back. Well done on making a decision about the envelope!

Well done coconuts on looking in the bag! It's silly how hard these things are to do, but we all understand what you're going through.

Welcome WIW ...i think the wait to the 20 week scan is really tough. symptoms stop, and it's still too early to feel movements. Feel free to mental as much as you need to. We have a healthy supply of fish in here to use as and when we see fit

cep I used a ring sling with DS, cradle hold from birth. He loved it in there and I found it really useful when out shopping at the weekend etc. as trying to find lifts and manuevoure a buggy around can be quite a pain when it's busy. Also used a wrap sling when he was a bit bigger (my sister gave me one when DS was about 3 months or so), which I liked but was always a little nervous I hadn't tied it right. I've got a mei tai which I'm planning on using with miniapple (if he ever decides to arrive ) This is all just what I did though...I didn't find a sling meet or anything, so didn't have any other input. Have you tried googling to see if there's one in your area? Tis a group of mums who use slings and they are always happy to help/advise etc.

I'm now officially the most pregnant I've ever been. DS was born lunchtime at 40+1...so this one has surpassed that. Still getting semi-painful contractions on and off during the days, mostly in the evenings. Just hope they'll mean labour will be quick once it does actually start. I'm feeling more positive though, so that's something.... just don't actually believe this pregnancy will ever end!

Hope you're all 'enjoying' this rainy sunday....who'd have though it was June eh?!

That's incredibly helpful coconuts - thank you v much. Will ring my m/w first thing tomorrow to see what she can do. I'm in Dubai and so things don't work quite the same way as in the UK (some bits better, some bits worse). I'm a bit "in-between" at the moment as my wonderful ob/gyn has gone and broken 3 vertebrae and so not seeing anyone for 5-6 weeks.... I haven't seen her since 8 weeks and I should have seen her last week but I'm just grateful I'm not one of her patients who is due any moment.... Well done on your breakthrough though - I'm impressed. I was given some stuff by a friend and it's sat in the back of the car since she gave it to me 3 weeks ago....

Thanks for the welcome and fish-slap warning apple and here's to your LO making an appearance sooner rather than later

Hi cep - hope all is ok and glad you had a good day yesterday. I am tempted to buy you that pushchair on e-bay for a fiver!

Cep - I had a ring sling which I tried ds in once and he loathed. I also had a wrap sling which was considerably more successful. I found him too heavy in it once we got to 4 1/2 months though. It was perfect when he was newborn to 3 months. I think I'll need to get the hang of back wraps this time round...

Well done my lovelies, that is a big step and you now officially deserve cake

cep I haven't tried one yet but pretty much all my MN group that I meet with in RL use slings & love them - I'm definitely getting one but we have a sling meet group round here so I am going to try and hire one from their library as I can't work out what will fit DH who is taller/bigger than I am and me as well. I reckon the ones that support the weight on both shoulders have got to be a better bet than the single shoulder ones but we shall see :)

WIW well done for plucking up the courage to join us! Two fingers to the jinx pixies, that's what I say

apples I bet you're snuggling miniapple before the weekend and probably sooner than that. I'd put good money on it. I've got the brie and champers at the ready and my pompoms are ready to go

My garden is a very happy place right now. And so am I, as the massivehuge rain that's landed on it means I don't have to carry about 20 watering cans' worth of water all the way up to my veg patch. Hoorah!

Thanks ladies ( WIW )

my problem as always is that there doesn't seem to be many that goes up to my size, they all seem to stop at 18 (i'm 20-22)

owl yay for the rain.

apple fx thing happen soon.

Sorry, quick Me Me Me

Woken up with an upset stomach and an achy bump We spent yesterday afternoon shifting furniture - I've just overdone it, haven't I?