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Pregnancy

Talk about every stage of pregnancy, from early symptoms to preparing for birth.

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Original poster

Weird/Inappropriate things people ask when you're pregnant

128 replies

lucielooo · 04/10/2010 15:58

I've lost count of the number of people whose first question is 'was it planned?'

Yes it was! and like I'd tell you if it wasn't!! Even DP's ex-wife asked this when he told her

We've been together for 3 years and lived together for 2 so it's not like we met 3 weeks ago on mysinglefriend.com!

People asking if we want a boy or a girl.. I'm pretty sure you get what you're given so it's pretty pointless!!

OP posts:

Are your children’s vaccines up to date?

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SittingWatchingWaiting · 07/10/2010 22:24

MissCKitty that is awful.
Why are you still close with someone who would take delight in telling you that.
Why would she feel the need to tell you.

at your Nan Laurenamium.

Jenni I assume he must have been ridiculously good looking and practically perfect in every way.

wondersnuffle · 07/10/2010 22:44

'Are you having a big baby or just carrying a lot of water?' I had thought I was a fairly average size for this stage.

I would have liked to have said 'in a few months time I will be able to see my feet again but you will still be socially inept'. I'm just not quite brave enough.

I had forgotten about the ginger tea as well, to think I spent all those months throwing up (and still am) because I never realised about ginger tea

lieinqueen · 08/10/2010 08:21

I had, from my own mother, "You never know, you might end up with one like your brother!" (with a giggle).

My brother was starved of oxygen at birth and brain-damaged. He still can't live independently. My greatest fear is that I "end up with one like my brother", and I nearly didn't want to try for children because of the risk.

On a lesser scale, from my partner's parents, we've had

will you keep the clothes for the next one? (Eh? One at a time please! We might be shite at this parenting thing!)
are you (me, but not him) going back to work? (Because my job is obviously not impt to me, nor to us financially, even though I earn 3x his very low salary)
are you expecting problems breast-feeding? (Because they saw we'd bought a breast-pump, with the idea that we might be able to share the feeding, with the idea that I might go out sometimes. My MIL gasped in horror at this, and said "You can't do that!". She then realised that what she had said was a bit off, and she added "Not every time". )

FIL topped all that with "Just you wait!". ("Fuck off, father in law", I didn't say. He also told my DP that whatever we did, we shouldn't have the baby sleeeping in the same room as us. )

Also, a friend said I looked very small when I'd just had a blood test suggesting a high risk of a small baby. I know bump size isn't correlated with baby size, but I was feeling a little vulnerable at the time.

PenguinsMummy · 08/10/2010 12:55

Ladies, this thread has really made me laugh!

I tend to get very big very fast so I usually get a get a huge intake of breath followed by "You've got how long left - are you sure - is it twins!!!"

With DD2, we found out the sex at the 20 week scan and when we told my mum her immediate reaction was "well you will have to have another one now given that it's another girl!" - give me a chance............

googleberry · 08/10/2010 21:30

This is my third I have a four year old & two year & Ive had 'was it planned' eh yes! I have a boy & girl & someone said why are you having another you have one of each??

mybabywakesupsinging · 08/10/2010 23:44

My (lovely) colleagues telling me they had decided I was pregnant on the basis of breast size (at about 10 weeks)...they had done the same for another pg friend a few months before.
I also work with doctors and none of them realised for about another 2 months+.

moppetymum · 09/10/2010 23:45

Googleberry...same here! It's my third and sooo many people asked if it was planned - how rude!!! I also have a girl and a boy and people seem to think it's mad to bother having another baby...grrrrrr
I heard it so much it made me doubt it too!

runnergal · 10/10/2010 10:05

Just found out i'm pregnant...can't wait for all these to happen to me!!! due to fact that we aren't married, i'm expecting the "was it planned?" to happen a lot!

sophielouise · 10/10/2010 17:34

I keep getting 'are you excited?' and for some reason it annoys me, because I'm not sure if excitement is what I'm feeling, and so it makes me feel bad that I'm NOT feeling excited! Also the name thing, don't ask if I've thought of any names, and then pull faces at the names I list.. it's just plain mean!!!

Jenni363 · 10/10/2010 17:54

We decided not to tell anybody of the name we decided after my own mother told me its a gypsy name - in a very patronising way!! We love the name Freya - I'm scandinavian and Freya was the Viking goddess of beauty and fertility which we think is pretty cool :)

sophielouise · 10/10/2010 18:06

Oooh Freya's one of my favourite names too! Haven't told anyone this one yet though, have learnt my lesson...

Catspersonalbanker · 10/10/2010 19:23

I've had the name thing too but we came up with something really random to watch the reactions.

DH keeps telling people its called Kumquat!.. he thinks its hilarious.[ blush]

GumtreeGirl · 10/10/2010 22:45

My favourite when preg with DS, particularly from peeps at work was 'Were you trying for long?'

WTF am I supposed to reply to that??

'Yes, we've been at it like rabbits since May. Would you like a rundown of the dates and times?'

I'm 2 weeks away from telling people at work this time around, so expecting a lot of these again, along with 'Was it planned?'

FGS...

scubamummy · 10/10/2010 23:25

Had 20 week scan, found out the sex - a girl :)

MIL: "Are you sure it's not a boy? The scan might be wrong. I really wanted a boy. We don't DO girls in our family".

Feck off! Have a boy yourself if you want one so much. And deal with the fact you're having a granddaughter!!! Grrrrr.

CuppaTeaJanice · 11/10/2010 10:06

From my mum when I told her we were expecing DS - 'Are you going to get married then? Otherwise we'll be illegitimate grandparents!!' We might one day, but it's not the 1950s, we've got better things to spend our money on, and if you ever refer to my son as a bastard then we're going to fall out big time.

My dad's friend - 'What are you going to do about your business? It'll go to pot!' Er, no, I've been building up loads of stock and somebody will be looking after my shop while I'm on maternity leave.

The paediatrician checking DS when he was born - 'Was he conceived naturally?' Yes, why would you assume otherwise? I'm only 32!

PinkElephant73 · 11/10/2010 12:07

A (childless) old friend asked DP the following via his Facebook page (so anyone could see)

"Was it a burst condom or were you riding bareback"

[there is no "vomiting" smiley is there)

PinkElephant73 · 11/10/2010 12:10

Just remembered that at an antental checkup the consultant obs, after asking me if I had any other kids, went on to say "Is it the same father?" none of your damn business and totally irrelevant to my antenatal care!

ecuse · 11/10/2010 17:09

Well just yesterday I was fuming about mine and now I feel like I've got off lightly with repeated "was it an accident?" and "are you getting married?"s! And a handful of "how are you going to manage financially?"s.

Before we were telling people my boyfriend was really worried about telling because he said we'd get all of those questions and they would freak him out. I told him not to be silly, that nobody would be so rude as to ask those things. Shows what I know. It's easier to count the people that haven't asked them.

Jenni363 · 11/10/2010 18:56

Ah forgot about this one! A (male) colleague in the office was the first one to know about my pregnancy, I was only 6 weeks so hadn't really told anybody but we are good friends and were supposed to go out for drinks later... So I whispered to his ear.. (Looking very happy and exited) that I was pregnant - his comment - "are you planning to keep it?"!!!! Well yes, I am 33 and in a stable relationship with the man of my dreams, and it was planned, albeit only took me few weeks to get pregnant!!

Kiki84 · 13/10/2010 15:07

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Diamondback · 14/10/2010 17:08

"You want to watch your weight now." from my Dad. Every week since I got pregnant. I happily assure him everytime that I shall definitely be putting plenty of weight on

"Look at your boobs! Babies are brilliant!" from my mate, Steve. That just made me laugh though (and I have gone from a B to a FF).

I just can't wait until there's little shark fins and fists moving across my belly, so I can wear a tight top to work and scare my students. Then I have to work out a way to use that clip from Alien in a lesson...

MadAboutQuavers · 14/10/2010 17:16

New one from a (male) colleague!:

"It must be really awkward and difficult having sex now that you're very big" (I'm 37 weeks, and yes, my bump is of course "big"...)

My response: "Well... not for me it isn't..."

doireallywant3 · 19/10/2010 11:21

people are just making coversation. it can be annoying and intrusive though.
the worst is when you have reache dyour DD and you get texts/emails/calls EVERY DAY from people saying 'any news?' or 'any movements?'. NO!!!!!!!!! I'll tell you when it's born FFS. a friend advised me to broadcast my DD as being 2 weeks after is actually was. I will def do that this time.

AliceandtheGinormousBaps · 19/10/2010 11:43

Was it planned? (first one wasn't, second one was) got asked with both.

What did DH say? Is he pleased?

Bet you want a boy this time?

Wow you are really big/You are so neat [confusd]

You know that you could have a baby with Down syndrome too (from my mother because my sister has DS) then sis can have a ds friend (don't ask)

Hope you are dong your pelvic floor exercises?

Two c sections - you are so lucky!

Now you have one of each, is that it? (yes i know, innocent question but not something to decide when juggling a newborn and a potty training toddler!)

Not so much this time, but with my first pregnancy i got told so many horror stories about birth/ill babies etc. And at my post natal group (run by HV) we were asked about our birth experiences. When i told about my 30hr labour followed by emcs, the HV the asked "Has anyone got a positive birth story" Just because mine didn't go to plan, oesn't mean it wasn't positive!

Diamondback · 19/10/2010 14:52

New one at work last Friday: "Hello Fatty!"

'Phil,' I said, 'in a few months, this belly will be gone, but what about yours?'

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