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Potty training

Is your child ready for potty training at nursery? Here's the place for all your toilet training questions.

Original poster

No progress with potty training at nearly four, worried about starting school

101 replies

Joyeusse · 22/04/2026 12:55

Hello, mums! A very upset and stressed mum here - about potty training. My son is 4, starting school in Sept. He's such a sweet lil boy, affectionate and behaving as much as possible for his age. We've been trying the potty training for 2 years now and absolutely no progress at all. I did everything, books, songs, cartoons, all models of potties, took him in the bathroom with us, talked a lot, explained, made him sit, upairy pullups, naked days etc. He says yes, I understand, yes I will, then holds it. He got to sit on a potty for 4 h in a row, its madness. And not even a drop. Then, I get him up, put some undies, 5 min later he would do a pool on the floor. Yesterday he did a poo and he was fine with it, but never ever did he do a pee by his own will. Only a couple of times, after spending hours on the potty and because we were already so upset or he just couldnt hold it anymore. I dont ask you what to do because I honestly know I did everything here. Im only asking if anyone had been through this and how was it with the school? Im so stressed and frustrated, they will probabbly think I never bothered. But the truth is Im at my wits end and it consumes me terribly. And Im afraid it will damage our relation and he will turn into a boy he really isn't, just out of fear or stress because of the potty thing. So, if anybody else experienced such a stressful situation, how long did it take to actually get successful and how was it mamaged at reception? Thank you for reading.

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DearDog96 · 22/09/2026 11:06

Joyeusse · 21/09/2026 11:32

Dear all,

I get back to you with a message to confirm my son got out of nappies on his own, quite shortly after this topic started. I took the advice to step back one more time and a few days later I casually asked him in the morning if he wanted to try the potty for his morning peepee. He simply said yes. A few seconds later, he finished. I asked if he wanted nappy back on or try some underwear, he said he still wanted the nappy. A couple of hours later, I asked again, he said yes again. His nappy was dry. After he finished, without spending ages on the potty, I asked again if he wanted nappy or underwear and this time he chose undies. It all seemed surreal. I carefully reminded him that wearing undies will have him.using only the potty or the toilet, in order to avoid wetting or soiling himself. A few hours later, he asked for the potty. At night he requested a nappy but kept it dry. The next day he was only in underwear and no accident, and in the evening he also requested underwear. I didn't blink and he didn't disappoint. Almost 3 months now, no accidents. He simply said he wants to do it like big children. He used both potty and toilet with the same success. We have a big sized potty, like a mini toilet with lights and flush button etc, so it is not a issue given his age.

My advice to everyone reading this topic - if you are going through everything I described, and you feel you tried it all with no results, there's a chance out there that your child listened and one day he will just do it.

Thank you all for trying to support us the best you could, I appreciate your time and generosity about sharing from your experience. Special thanks to Meetmeinthecorner for your gentle understanding.

As for those still questioning the 4h on the potty episode - nobody forced him, it was a stubbornness we couldn't fight, and ended up with a meltdown when I took him away, and later with a wee all over. I was crying next to him and tried my best to persuade to abort the mission and try later, but he constantly refused, saying "but I wanna do a wee now!". From that experience I can only advice other parents to try to avoid this approach of their little ones, despite any tantrum or meltdown or anything.

Thank you this is just what I needed! Still struggling with DD

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