Started potty training today - anyone else want to give / get a bit of moral support?

[Biscuitsandtea]

Hi, DS is 3 and we've started potty training him today. We were hoping to wait until he woke up one morning and said 'I'm done with nappies thanks very much Mummy - let's go wild with the pants', but this hasn't happened so we thought we'd just try him with nothing on at first and then pants and see how it goes.

Just wondered if anyone else was starting too and wanted to go through it together?

We've done various bits of nappy free time for months with varying amounts of success, but only ever an hour or two here and there with no consistency to see how he was doing and whether we thought he knew when he was weeing or pooing. It's only recently that I've thought that he actually does know hence deciding to give it a go today.

We had a quiet weekend so thought 'no time like the present!'

Now a couple of times in the week we'd had no nappy on and a fair bit of success in the potty. Wednesday = lots of mopping up wees but a few 'hits' at the end of the afternoon. Thursday was better with no accidents. but this was still doing everything bare bum!

Today we were doing pretty well this morning. Everything going in the potty and no accidents, so after lunch we thought we'd try adding pants into the equation. previously pants = accidents (I wonder if he would forget it wasn't a nappy?) so we never persevered with them, but we have this afternoon. Certainly more accidents this afternoon, which is I think a mixture of being tired and the 'pant effect' and we had a very rough few hours between say 3 and 5. Then we've had a few more wees on the potty and going a bit better this evening.

We're planning more of the same tomorrow but we have a birthday party to go to in the afternoon and I'm in a bit of a predicament about that in as much as I don't want to go back to nappies and confuse / demoralise him, but equally don't want loads of accidents at my friend's DDs party so as yet we're undecided. I think at the moment we'll be erring on the side of a nappy as it's just not fair if he has an accident in the middle of the party?

Anyway, anyone who wants to join me for the ride, please come aboard :-)

I'll have , and to help the journey go along!

Bertie try Bare bum for a while it worked for mine but before that I put him on the potty first thing & than increased it.
My ds is now in pants with 1 accident all day sometimes none don't mean to gloat but it took me ages to get to this stage so I am hoping we r nearly potty trained

That sounds great Shaz - well done!

How did you get on today Bertie?

We've now done a whole week without a wee accident which is great. But we've had a poo accident again today . So across the week we've had 6 poo accodnets on 5 days . I've upped the bribes from tomorrow whereby a poo gets a treat instead of a sticker. Other than that I'm hoping he just gets the hang of it soon - I'm fed up of pooey pants!

He's doing really well at night though. We've had 5 consecutive dry nappies in the morning which is a bit of a bonus! Even last night when he drank his milk right before bed so can't possibly have wee'd it out, and still dry this morning! In fact I think we've only had one wet nappy in the last 10. And that's really just a by product as I've not been trying anything or even bothered about night time training yet.

Still I wish he'd sort his poos out!

Yesterday was a bit rubbish, we went through about 7 pairs of pants I think. Today has been stressful so far. DP brought some jellybeans home from work for DS to have if he does a wee on the potty and the bribery technique was working quite well, this morning he took his own nappy off and then went downstairs quite happily with his bottle of water and sat on the potty while drinking it and produced a wee, so he got his jellybean. Then I went up to speak to DP about something (he was asleep as he works nights) and he woke up and then suggested we go to McDonalds, which DS got all excited about, and then I stupidly announced that he had to try on the potty before we could go in the car and he decided he didn't want to. Cue 2 hours of grumping from him because he wanted to go but didn't want to try on the potty and disappointment from everyone when we realised he really wasn't going to give in and we couldn't go back on it either. Eventually managed to "compromise" by getting him to sit on the seat on the toilet and then I just really quickly pulled his pants/trousers down and sat him back on it for 5 seconds so that he'd "done it" to prove that we weren't going to give in on this potty attempt before going in car thing. But of course he didn't really relax on it and didn't stay on long enough to do anything.

So we went to McDonalds anyway with the potty and a change of clothes and a towel in the car seat, and as soon as he took a sip of his drink he announced "I'm doing a wee!" (Obviously!) So DP said "Oh, DS!!" in an annoyed voice and DS did a mouth wibble and I leapt to his defence, but badly, and then we realised we'd left all the potty stuff in the car so DP went to get it. He then wanted DS to sit on the potty afterwards but I know DS doesn't do the half a wee thing, and I feel it's counterproductive, especially if he's seeing it as a punishment (which it's not meant as at all!) so I just wanted to take him into the toilets and get him changed as fast as possible. We had a chat and DS said he would [try to] tell me when he needs a wee in the future. But I've come up against something he thinks, which I think is a developmental thing, in that he thinks because he doesn't need a wee now, he thinks he can hold on indefinitely and can't seem to imagine a situation where he might need to do a wee urgently. So I think we need to focus on making the weeing part less scary for him and then he might not be trying so hard to avoid it and be more able to look out for the signs. But DP and I really need to be on the same page and I can't really talk to him about it in front of DS.

After going through 6 pairs of pants and one pair of jeans (for me) in 1 hour, I decided that DS wasn't ready yet for being nappy free. So he is back in a nappy but nursery still put him on the potty at regular intervals and at home, he goes on it before bath time.
Today we had a success, a trickle of a wee was done in the potty before bathtime. I think his problem is that he think it's a bad thing to wee outside of the nappy as his reaction was 'oh, no', stopping weeing and standing up. Therefore, DH and I did lots of praising and DS was also rewarded with a chocolate button.
So fingers crossed, it'll get better...

Today we had 2 accidents 1 in pants & the other bare bum where he was busy watching his fav DVD all in all a good day tonight he went wee before bath & than decided he wanted to go to bed in pants not pull ups so we will see in the morning if there is a wet bed or not

Bertie it is really difficult to have the same tactics as your DP/DH isn't it. My DH always insists on asking ds why ds didn't tell us. But I don't think ds can actually answer that question as I suspect he doesn't really know himself. But DH has a tendency to bang on about why? I can understand why he wants to know in a way because then we'd know what the problem was! But that isn't generally how parenting works!

Still you'll get there bit by bit I'm sure

Shaz - good luck with the overnight thing! I'm gonna see if ds can manage another week say of dry nappies and then perhaps make the nighttime leap too!

No accidents here today, but no poo either, even though I've been on mega red alert for one all day (fed up of the sound of my own voice asking if he wants a poo....).

Will see how he goes at nursery tomorrow....

Sorry, meant to say too that's good that you had a little success this evening Stone* - it's all about little steps I reckon. Hope there's more successes tomorrow . And 6 wees in an hour might be a record !

biscuits I know it's a lot but I think what happen is that everytimes h ewas feeling the wet from his pants, he stopped weeing, then when it was dry again, he carried on with his wee. I even put him on the potty!

Ah yes that makes sense, so it was really one wee in 6 parts!

Well hope that his little success and reward / praise will set him better for today. Keeping fingers (but not legs) crossed

Oh I'm a big fan of the finding out why thing, but agree it probably doesn't work well in potty training.

I think the problem was that DP was leaving it to me because I have the main care for DS so hadn't really asked what I was doing, but then when he is around he's joining in with totally different things to what I've been doing! He's off work for the next week after tonight anyway so we'll have to have a chat :)

Okay, I'm ready for the weekend: the pants are dry, the baby legs are ready and the washing machine is empty... Let's the nappy free weekend starts (well tomorrow ) I also have chocolate buttons in case we have any potty successes

What are these baby legs things?

Good luck though with The Big Weekend

And good luck Bertie too - a week with DP there too will be good for it all I'm sure.

biscuits BabyLegs are legs warmers. Great for this time of the year and potty training.

Today started if good with 1 accident but by this evening we had loads but I think it was down to wanting attention as dh was not around & he is a daddy's boy so hopefully tomorrow will be better

Hello, I might rejoin you on this thread if you don't mind.
DD is now 3 and is due to start nursery in January so I might attempt to potty train her before then unless it just doesn't work again!
We have been trying on and off since August and have just recently taken a few weeks off again after no success. Now she is 3 I am hoping she might understand a little more about what she is supposed to do.(I might be a little too over optimistic!)
Anyway wish us luck!

Wish you the best of luck ?

Argh, I honestly just think DS doesn't get it at all. He is currently running around in circles demanding pants so he can wee in them. We've tried bribing with jellybeans for a wee and ended up moving up to a ridiculous bribe of a kit kat AND one of his Christmas presents to open early if he does a poo. I'm just wondering if it's too much pressure now, but DP wants to carry on.

Oh - may have spoken too soon! Touch wood... but DS is currently sitting on the potty reading a story with DP with a nappy in the potty (which has convinced him to try a poo in there.)

Fingers crossed! :)

Oooh hope it continued to go well Bertie?

We're still poodling along with about 1 accident most days. One today, 1 yesterday, none over the weekend.

I think he's ok when you prompt him or take him because we're going anyway but the accidents come if you leave it to him to tell us. So if he's engrossed in playing he won't remember. He does sometimes say he needs it, but often that is when we've asked him.

Still I'm sure we'll all get there (eventually!)

Have some and - sounds like we all need it. In fact I'm forgetting, just because I'm preggers, everyone else could probably do with some !

Well he didn't actually do the poo but the fact he was willing to try was a BIG improvement.

I have noticed something in the last few days related to other things - he accidentally hurt me the other day and DP asked him to say sorry a couple of times. I told him not to push him into it - he was doing the defiant I-am-not-making-eye-contact-now thing. So we left it and then an hour or two later he came up to me completely unprompted and said "Sorry mummy" I was confused and said "Why?" and he said "For when I climbed on you." and I said "Oh! That's okay. Thank you for saying sorry. Shall we have a cuddle and then in future we can try to be

And similarly, the other day he had an apple and left the core on the floor when he was finished. I asked him to pick it up because it goes in the bin, he refused and ran off. So I left it on the floor and every time he came into the room I asked him again to pick it up and put it in the bin. Eventually left it on the side in the hope he would and I think DP ended up throwing it away when he was in bed. The next day, he ate a kitkat and just dropped the wrapper ignoring my instruction to put it in the bin. I was all grrr to DP saying I need a strategy to get him to listen to these kind of instructions, because I don't tend to punish directly for disobedience, and then today he had an apple and when it was finished he announced "I've finished, this goes in the bin!" and toddled off to put it in there And it was then that I thought, hmm, he seems in an agreeable sort of mood, so I asked him if he wanted to see if a wee would come out to see if he could get a jelly bean, and he said yes. So he sat on the potty and that was when he jumped up because he said there was a poo coming and he didn't want to do it there. So I think because he was in an agreeable sort of mood he was open to suggestion, but normally whenever you prompt him or try to get him to do a particular thing he really massively resists against it so maybe we need to be more hands off.

Ah that's an interesting observation - I notice that same sort of behaviour with DS sometimes. You know how normally if you tell them to say sorry for something they will but on occasion,m it turns into a huge issue with DS> The original misdemeanour probably wasn't so bad but we have ended up having a proper fall out over whether he'll say sorry. And he does that avoiding eye contact thing too!

Kinda glad it's not just mine....

And great progress that he would at least sit on the potty though - I think it's all about the small steps!

I really avoid battles over things like that, I think they're counterproductive. Of course there are things he doesn't get to decide, like getting in his car seat, but generally they are enforceable by the adult strength winning out...

Ah I fear the days of my strength winning out are numbered! I can carry him etc when he's being compliant but if he's gone all floppy / uncooperative then it's game over pretty much!

DS is pretty good most of the time, but they all have their moments eh?

Aha!! We have had success with the cheerio in the toilet technique! Looks like it's standing-up wees from now on!