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May 2010: All the babies have arrived, welcome to the other side!

986 replies

rachelfruitloop · 16/06/2010 14:21

Here we are ladies, a new Postnatal thread! I wonder if we'll fill this one up as fast with one-handed typing?!

OP posts:
Are your children’s vaccines up to date?
alexw · 30/06/2010 10:44

Hi sorry to hear about growth spurts/lots of feeding/waking. Hopefully they will all settle soon. Repeat the mantra it's just a phase. Any of you near NW London or Bucks/Herts? Am desperate to meet other mums with babies of similar age but am very shy so have not braved any groups yet...

mollycuddles · 30/06/2010 11:09

Little sleep again but I'm ok. Slept from 12-3 (which is great for us) but then up to 5, slept until 6 with poo explosion, slept again until 9ish but I was up with dd1 talking to her. Her latest jealous huff has passed. She can be vicious and very personal when cross with me and I'm not good at coping with it at the moment.

HBmummy - completely understand the reliving and grieving. Don't try to squash down the feelings. Allow yourself time set aside each day to face things and have a good cry if you want.

Ande - love the name. Any doctor who connection?

Sassles · 30/06/2010 12:09

Thanks for the support over the in-law thing. Compromise is that DH taking the days off work to be here and they will come on wed and leave sunday. Still exhausting when u are already exhausted but will just need to be a big girl about it.

ande I've known 3 rorys' and they were all lovely lovely guys. Brill name. Were you tempted with the name Bob due to the possibility of intervention from the bobbies?

katey I'm in Scotland so guess bit far for a meet up?

memory Poor DM. Hope she will have another go soon. at the desperate latching. Sam was not happy with DH giving bottle, but happier on 2nd go.

tomlin LMAO at ur DH. Mine does that with cat food packets. On floor beside the bin!

homebirth molly [sad} at the disrupted nights. Babies may sleep for ages tonight tho??

Oh. Wee monster awake again. /that was a 10 min nap! Thinking growth spurt!

MoggMum · 30/06/2010 12:16

After two good nights Sun & Mon, my LO wanted to feed every two hours last night and now just wants to cry all day today (except when he's feeding!).

Just to top it off one of my cats has been sick all over the lounge carpet - yuk

first1 · 30/06/2010 14:40

Hi everyone,

As usual am crap with keeping up on here. But for those of you who are aware of my situ, this is the latest...

Last Friday I found myself sitting opposite a £230 p/h lawyer listening to her talk a million miles an hour about divorce. Yup, (D)H has TOLD me that this is whats happening. What a sweetheart. Perfect timing, 5 week old baby doesnt really seem to ring any bells in his selfish head. He's already moaning about child/spousal maintenance, think he thinks divorce is a complete cut off to all responsibility. Found out on Friday that for the past 2years he's lied to me about his salary!!! God knows why but makes me quite sure I dont want to be with a liar.

Anyway..me, am on my THIRD lot of antibs as 3rd degree tear still not healed. 3 lots of antibs = RAGING thrush, am going spare!! Went back on the pill on day 21 (now 34) having stopped bleeding but have been bleeding again now this last week. Doc says its a period and the pill hasnt synchronised yet. "Bloody" fed up of bleeding now though.

Chloe - She's doing well, rarely cries (really feel for you newmomma, am about 45mins away from you if you ever want a helping hand ), is on 4oz about every 4hrs, does gorgeous gummy smiles now too!!

Havent managed to read the past 4 pages of posts I seem to missed, but will do so very soon.

MoggMum · 30/06/2010 15:00

first1 really sorry that things have come to this for you. Hope you heal soon but glad to hear that Chloe is doing so well

newmomma hope you're ok - my LO has been crying all day and that's bad enough. Hope things get easier for you soon.

homebirthmummy4 · 30/06/2010 15:22

oh first1, i am so sorry to hear your news, my ex and i split when dd3 was 2 weeks old (he woke me up on day14 at 2am with his teeth in my arm!!!) and it was bloody lonely, so much so that after 3 months i took the violent man back in and then spent 6 years trying to get rid as he hadnt changed . anyway, what i am trying to say, is that i do understand a little bit, and if you ever need to rant, i am listening, i can give you my email if you like?

i tried my babasling just now, she looked all folded in half! but she fell asleep in about 45 seconds hmmph, going to browse youtube for an instruction video, i must be doing it wrong.

moggmum, hope your day has improved a little.
gotta go milk bank lady is coming in a minute to discuss donating. hope it works out.

pigleychez · 30/06/2010 15:33

first1- Such a shame its come to this. Hope you have plenty of support around you.
ouch on the tear not healing well.

Moggmum- yuk on the cat sick- how very inconsiderate!

Sassles- glad you managed a comprise with DH.

Molly- glad DD1 is over it (for now anyway!)
I dont think they realise how hurtfull they can be to a hormonal new mummy.
Her turn will come!

Alex- no were near im afraid. Check out Netmums.com they have local met a mum boards on there. Ive made quite a few friends through there. We still see some we made when DD1 was only 12weeks.... we are seeing them sunday for her DDs second birthday!
They also arrange group meet ups if you feel nervous one on one. Ive met mums for coffee before and could tell we didnt 'gel' as such so just didnt meet again. Worth a shot though

Alle- we had 11-5 too... quick feed then till 8. DD1 didnt wake till 7.30 either so i got an extra hour there too

homebirth- know exactly how you feel thinking the birth is yet to happen. Odd isnt it. I get odd times where ill see something and think oh ill need to pack that for the labour. I really wanted a waterbirth this time but there really wasnt the time in the end. I remember being wheeled past the birth pool thinking... oh i want to use that.. until another contraction distracted me! Still wish id been able to experience it though... maybe next time

Ande- great that your little man now has a name.. and a fab one it is too

Pamlet- With you on the growth spurt. Lucy is little and often at the mo.

Tomlin- Congrats on the house sale Hope you can manage to choose between the two soon.

Think DD is abit under the weather as she was actually asking for bed at 11.45am!
Wasnt really interested in Lunch, just kept asking to sleep. She went for her nap at 12.40 and is still asleep almost 3 hours later. Her nose is streaming today so guess shes got a summer cold.

Nonstop washing here today. All bedding from DD1! She had a leaky nappy over her bed then came into our bed this morning and spilt her drink of milk all over our bedding!- good job the weathers nice and it can all go on the line!

alle01 · 30/06/2010 16:12

first- i'll say it, what a bastard and good riddance! karma will get him somehow. take it easy and take care of yourself, and little one. if you need anything...

Den26 · 30/06/2010 16:36

Hi All...

Alex - good news about your dad, he sounds like a real fighter!!

Ande - lovely name - it was one of our choices too!

First1 - i'm so sorry your having to deal with so much right now, please vent on here ...

Sorry to all those having trouble with LO's settling.

Re DH/DP - same boat here i'm afraid, bloody useless!!! Why is it i have to ask him to do things - he shouldn't need telling, he should know

In bit of a panic today, Rian had 6 week check. You may remember issue with shape of his head when born, was seen by 2 paediatricians in hosp who couldn't really give me a straight explanation and sad to wait for GP opinion at 6 weeks. GP now wants to refer him to paediatrician as she is concerned that she can't feel his back fontanelle and his front one seems small. Possibly bones have begun to fuse so may need them separated??? What the hell does that involve??? Now waiting for an appointment to come through I'm so worried and feel completely helpless. Have posted on developmental thread too to see if anyone has similar experience.

Carikube · 30/06/2010 16:57

first1 I'm sorry your DH has turned out to be such a t* but it definitely sounds as though you're better off without him. And at least you've got Chloe

AnAngelWithin · 30/06/2010 17:03

hombirthmummy i have the babasling too and feel the same!! don't think i'm doing it right!

first1, i am sorry you are having such a tough time. bless you.

we went to hospital today for dd3 to have her ultrasound on her hips which she didn't like. They will write with the results.

memorylapse · 30/06/2010 18:38

Tomlin..the house was amazing..she looked like Ameera from Eastenders

Den..dont know much about the skull bone fusing thing but have heard of it

some more info www.nhsdirect.wales.nhs.uk/encyclopaedia/c/article/craniosynostosis/here

molly..hows the dizziness??

memorylapse · 30/06/2010 18:40

tsk..that didnt work..will try again

here

alle01 · 30/06/2010 18:40

oh den, it does sound scary, hope it is actually really simple and routine... it makes my scare look silly, monday oscar was breathing really funny, and hyperventilating, as severe asthma runs in the family, i pulled dh from work and rushed him to the gp, perfectly fine, probably the milk went the wrong way, mixed feeding babies get confused, and choke a bit with the bottles. but i am allowed to panic, the gp had a laugh, i seemed so composed and in control for my 6 weeks check only last thursday... he discovered that i am human after all

MarquiseDeMerteuil · 30/06/2010 18:51

It's been a busy couple of days on here - does this mean everyone is gradually getting acclimatised to life with their newborns? Hope so!

cupcake - I'm usually a big reader too, but for some reason I've hardly read anything since Felix was born. I've read the whole booker longlist each of the last three years, which is announced in July, so I'll have to get back in the reading habit again in time for this year's list!

molly sorry you were denied your day with just Molls and DH. I hope you get another opportunity soon.

angel you must be thrilled to have your washing machine back at long last !

newmomma i really feel for you with your DD's relentless crying, it must be incredibly frustrating and distressing for you not knowing what's bothering her, especially having tried one remedy after another. I'm afraid I have no advice to offer, but it sounds like others on here have made some good suggestions. Keeping my fingers crossed that one of them, or your HV tomorrow or BF'ing clinic today provides some relief for your DD and you.

Homebirth - how did the meeting with the milk bank lady go? Next time you want to embark on an ironing marathon to take your mind of things, you're welcome to come and tackle mine!! I don't do ironing as a rule, as I find that folding things up immediately they're finished in the dryer works a treat. But these days if Felix is mid-feed when the dryer finishes, I don't always get to it straight away, and then things get crumpled. Very annoying, especially since it's currently linen-trouser-weather!

SK don't feel bad about your eldest two feeling like they're missing out. They'll benefit in loads of ways from being part of a big loving family.

I read the last two days' posts with lots of green face moments, especially at Alle and AlexW! Alle because you're in Brighton! I love Brighton (my wedding dress came from a shop there!), it's a fantastic place and must be especially great in this weather (although probably overrun with tourists). And Alex, because of your 6.30-6.30 sleep!

Alex - it's fantastic to hear that your Dad has taken a turn for the better, fingers crossed that the improvements continue. How was the BCG jab this morning? We've just had a letter through with a date for Felix to have his, but it's two days before we go on holiday, and I'm in two minds as to whether to postpone it until after we get back. How did Julia react to it? My Dsis is in South Bucks, so not far from you probably. She mentioned that there are lots of classes for things like baby massage, baby signing etc. at local surestart centres, that are either free or just have a nominal charge. I'm quite a shy person too, and hate going up to people I don't know and starting a conversation, but find that it's a bit easier in a class type environment where people expect a bit of chat and won't thing it's weird, and also where there is a ready-made thing to talk about / comment on as a way to starting conversations. It might be a gentle way for you to meet other mums in a friendly environment.

Pigley - glad to hear the baby massage had a soporific effect on Lucy. Felix and I are starting our baby massage class tomorrow, so hopefully it will have a similar effect on him!

sassles - I can sympathise on Sam's catnap day - Felix has occasional days like that too, but seems to go back to normal a couple of days later. I think it might be when he has a growth spurt and just wants to feed constantly. It's frustrating, isn't it, because you can't get anything done. On days like that I end up with loads of half-finished jobs around the house, like washing that never makes its way from the machine to the dryer, a half empty dishwasher, and half-eaten food!

kateyjane - I know what you mean about feeling like you know everyone on here despite never having met in RL. Like you, I'm also pretty knew to the chatting online thing!

ml - can't believe you're back at work already, are you wonderwoman or something?! WAG party sounds fab!

tomllin - had to laugh at the actions of your DH. Mine is usually a complete star, but last night managed to do something really annoying. While I was feeding Felix before putting him down to sleep for the night, DH popped out to get us each a beer to have with dinner. I asked if he had his keys on him, and he said yes. 5 minutes later, the doorbell went, and I decided to ignore it as Felix was just dropping off to sleep and I knew DH would be home any minute and could intercept whoever it was at the door. But then a few seconds later I heard an apologetic and rather embarrassed voice coming through the letterbox. It was DH, who had somehow mislaid his keys. I still don't know if he had them before leaving the house or if he just hadn't checked his pockets and automatically said he had them. Needless to say Felix woke up when I went to answer the front door and then wouldn't go to sleep for another hour. DH was very sheepish and pretty contrite!

Pamelat - hope you had a better day today after your awful disturbed night last night. Also hope your DH recovers from his op quickly.

Ande - congrats on finally choosing a name - and a great one it is too!

Moggmum at catsick on carpet - yuk! Hope you found it before the hot weather got to it!

First1 - So sorry to hear your latest update. It really can't be easy to go through that at any time, but especially right now with a newborn. At least Chloe sounds like a little angel.

den I hope you get some answers to your question on the developmental thread. I'm afraid I can't provide any enlightenment.

DH just texted to say he'll be home before 7, hooray! That's very unusual, it's usually closer to 8. (Pigley and kateyjane I can sympathise on the commuting DHs). We only live 6 miles from his office but in London that's an hour's commute - 30 minutes on the train (which goes in a big loop) and then a 25 minute walk from the station to his office. Fortunately we're only 2 minutes from the station at our end, otherwise it would be a nightmare. I'm not looking forward to having to do that again when I go back to work next year. Not sure how I'll make it back in time to collect Felix from nursery as most of them seem to close at 6 or 6.30 and I never used to finish work before 6.30 at the earliest, usually closer to 7. Things will have to change. But I won't think about that until much closer to the time, as I'm planning to have a whole year off!

Hope everyone has more settled nights tonight. Sorry for mammoth post!

pamelat · 30/06/2010 18:59

Love the name Rory

Alex is often and lots really struggling today (and last night was obviously awful) but yesterday he was so good.

Today he has basically fed or fretted and that was with my DH around to help too. Giving him napppy off time on his play mat now though and he isnt crying ! .. yet.

rachelfruitloop · 30/06/2010 19:10

Evening ladies!tomlin congrats on the house sale! I'd be keen on option 2 as well! lol about your DH's absent mind, this is making me feel a lot better! I hope everyone's having a good day. I am, Eric slept from about midnight to 4.30 am, so not bad! Whilst visiting the in-laws in Wales, I met up with racquelwelsh and adorable George today! It was so nice to see you, Racquel! Alex I live in Bucks, at the end of the Met Line and would like to meet up! Are you on the FB group? first1 that is terrible news about your divorce. I'm so sorry. It sounds like you and Chloe are better off without him. HBmummy I'm sorry that you're feeling down. I know what it's like to not have the birth you hoped for, as things went awry for me when I had DS1. It took me quite a long time to work through my feelings. Feel free to vent here! Den that's very worrying about Rian's skull, I hope it's all ok. molly it must be tough dealing with a child with more sophisticated emotions, I'm finding it tough dealing with a jealous three-year-old so I can't imagine your DD is easy to cope with. Sorry, there is more I intended to respond to but have run out of screen space on my mobile!

OP posts:
alexw · 30/06/2010 19:33

Thank you all for your lovely mesages about my dad. Rachel, am on Met line too. Let's try to arrange something! Am not on facebook. You could email me [email protected] would be great to see someone with lo the same age. Wishing lots of sleep vibes to LOs for tonight.

memorylapse · 30/06/2010 19:55

first1..so sorry to hear about your DH ..he sounds like a complete twonk

MDM..sadly I wish I was wonderwoman !..drawbacks of running your own business

alle..very scary that..I would have panicked too..yes its true that breastfed babies can gag on the bottle...Olivia does..its because they have to work harder at the breast so get a shock with bottles as it comes out quicker

ande..yay! on the name..

Angel..fingers crossed that the x ray is fine

homebirth..your feelings are not unusual..so sorry you are feeling sad though I think you could do with talking it over though..can you make an appt with the hospital to discuss your labour?

I know this doesnt help..but please try and focus on the now..you have a beautiful DD..so the outcome is still the same...I do understand how you feel as my DS2 nearly died at delivery and was rushed to SCBU..I developed PND as a result.

Pamelat..Olivia was really fretful last night..and was awake a lot too..we seem to take one step forward and 2 steps back

Alex thats wonderful news about your dad..he must have been a cat in a previous existence!

KaffaCakes · 30/06/2010 21:14

Hi all! Wow, its been so long since I have been on here. Time at a premium and all that, but things are finally settled enough for me to him down for five minutes while I try and catch up! It's great to hear all your news about your babies and how you're all doing. There's far too much on the thread to catch up with it all, especially before my little one wakes up in a strop again! He hates the hot weather.

first1 So sorry to hear of your predicament, it;s a nightmare scenario but sounds like you're coping fantastically well despite all the sadness. I hope things work out for you and Chloe, without that heartless fiend of a husband.

peaky and carikube My DS (how weird typing that!!!) also has the nice habit of growling and twisting, which of course yanks my nipples in every direction. Ouchies. And grinding himself into my breast whilst kneading it with his little fist. I ask him nicely to be gentle but I guess there's just no reasoning with a hungry newborn!

Besides that the feeding is going great, though I have had mixed success with expressing. Now I've read your tips about different flow during the day MDM then hopefully I'll fare better with my experiments tomorrow. I have a bottle ready for my DP to administer in the morning when he gets up for work, and having spoke to the health visitor on Friday have decided to replace Albie's last feed of the day to formula in a bid to fill him up. He's very greedy! So far the experiments have worked and he has slept for three hours after that bottle. He really has no sleep routine at the moment, it's hard. Initially, he went down at 11 and slept until 2.30 or 3ish, beofre going back down for two hours then up until 10am ish. Now he is totally unpredictable. Do you think it's worth keeping a note of feeds and nap times over the course of the next few days to see if a pattern emerges? He is six weeks tomorrow and apparently this is when a human's biorhythm kicks in, so all being well a routine of sorts will emerge over the next week or so.

The good news little Albie is getting ever so big! He was weighed on Friday and was 9lb 12oz- that's 2lb 4oz on his birth weight! I am so proud of myself for doing it all on my own. BFing is tough at times when I've been up all night and Albie never seems full. Luckily he has settled down feeing-wise the past few days and is going a couple of hours between feeds, spending the rest of the time snoozing, napping, smiling or vibrating in his rocker. Going to get an activity mat tomorrow so he can have some quality tummy time. He already has been holding his head up since birth and is always taking everything in around him. Nosy little bugger.

hobnob we had to get Albie's hearing checked twice as he had pooed on the way out and every orifice was stacked full of meconium! Poor little man. He passed fine too

pigley Love your outing to the chinese! we took ALbie to Nando's last week, they gave us the whole top floor to ourselves so we had room for all his gubbins and I could breastfeed in peace. Lovely!

Anyways that's all from me for now. I'll try and check back every day to keep up. It's so great having this online support group like you say, kateyjane, I love it here! Especially as none of my friends or family have babies. Lukcily my DP's sister had a baby three months before Albie was born so she as well as you lot are my baby gurus!

Hobnobfanatic · 30/06/2010 21:42

Busy, busy, not posted for yonks blah blah, but a two-minute quickie while I can! So rushed, juggling life, work, LO and DD1... Arghghghghhtg!

Anyway... Kaffa - my DD pooed in the womb too - I hadn't thought about the meconium being in the ear. Interesting!

FIrst1 - so, so sorry to hear your news. I struggled to save a failing relationship in the early months of a newborn. But when a tosser of a partner gets cold feet, there's nothign you can do than get on with life and be thankful he'll no longer be in it. You and your daughter deserve so much better. Really sorry to hear about your tear, too; it's all you need right now.

Tomlin - I'd opt for the house you prefer too. location, location, location!

Gotta go - will finish again soon!

Den26 · 30/06/2010 21:59

ML thanks for link

Alle - its all very scarey isn't it.

DP been looking up info on net and its making me feel physically sick. Can't bear the thought of wee man having to have surgery on his head ....

Hobnobfanatic · 30/06/2010 22:12

Den - you must be so worried. I hope you get an appointment soon, to put your mind at rest.

alle01 · 01/07/2010 08:25

den, stop googling!!!
in serious medical matters, you will only scare yourself, get an appointment with your gp to explain everything involved and the consecuencies of doing it and not doing it. i used to have apnea in my sleep, basically you stop breathing while you sleep and if you don't wake up you die, sounds terrible, chat with the gp, all explained, turns up it is not so easy to die that way and there is degrees and factors affecting, in the end i didn't even needed the operation...