November '09 and the months are flying by, our 3 month plus troop, and us, the knitted boob group!

[SirBoobAlot]

New thread, we chat so much!

Before I go for the night, just wanted to say if you haven't read 'The Time Traveller's Wife' yet, it's well worth reading. Just finished it, cried lots and lots.

Speaking of crying, does anybody else find that they get emotional about other people's babies as well as their own? I never used to care but since having one of my own I've turned into a complete sop!

lemontop with babies, you would lie them on your lap with their head slightly lower and give a good firm pat between the shoulder blades. I've done a few first aid courses

Pav hope your dh sticks at it.

Heading off to bed now so sending sleep vibes to you all

I watched the film of the Time Travellers Wife. I should have read the book first!

I get weepy at pretty much anything baby related now. Whereas before, i was not that bothered.

I watched The Time Travelers Wife this morning. The book is much better.

MUST go to bed, but before I do..

...lovely photos from London

... you have a bed big enough for 4 pav ...helips fingers crossed for you & DP & DD next week

I tried (and failed) to reclaim my 1 hour a week me time and go to pilates tonight. DH looked panic stricken when I said I was going and Isla had failed to go down. He lasted half an hour before I got a phonecall to tell me she was apoplectic. She did have her jabs today, to be fair, but I suspect most of the problem lies in her being far too used to being attached to me in one way or another of an evening...

the 30 mins I did get was good though. made me realise how far I've come since having DD1 on one hand, but how much I've got to do to even get as far as I was at 20 weeks when I stopped! Lying with both feet up at 90 degrees was a challenge too far

hobnob What happened was, the bed turned out to not even be big enough for 2 Reuben went into his basket, DH was not home, and DD was kicking me while sleeping sidewards, moaning she did not have enough room ! She was in her own bed before DH even got home! And she did not even complain!

Reuben has found his voice in the last couple of days. He has been doing very long and happy goooooooooooos and other sounds and it is just lovely. He has always made some sounds, but not proper talking sounds like this. He also does a squeal which I am a bit about. DD never managed to squeal for some reason, so i bypassed the whole squealy screaming thankfully (even now she cant do a high pitched squeal, although she makes up for it by shouting very loudly!) but alas this boy is going to be a squealer i think, if he can do it already

Another good night here. Reuben was assleep by 8:45pm (would have been earlier but DD would not stop talking!) through til 1:30am then through til 6:30am when he was woking by DD shouting 'its the morning! it IS it IS!'.

Bella just gave Reuben a cuddle and said 'your the best boy ever' then said 'i don't want him to go back in your tummy mama, i missed him when he was in your tummy and didn't have a name' [aw] she got the biggest cuddles! we are soo lucky to have such a loving sister for him.

Oh and sorry to hear you did not get to pilates hobnob . I have not yet succeeded in going out without DS other than to the shops. I am going to go visit a friend for a non-child related cup of tea this week in the evening some time, if I can force myself not to go straight to bed!

Pav your DD sounds gorgeous as ever.

Hooray for good nights' sleep. James did well - slept through from 9pm until 5am . But we have been up since then as he is a real chatterbox in the morning. His voice is so loud! This baby needs volume control.

hobnob Well done for at least trying to reclaim some time to yourself. I haven't done that yet... Next time maybe you'll get the full hour

WOW! 9pm to 5am! that is impressive ! is that normal? You must be feeling very happy with that. The chattering is lovely isn't it! Reuben is not waking chattering yet, he is waking by kicking his legs and snuffling!

No, not normal. It's the first time he hasn't woken in the night at least once for about a month (more often twice). Before that - in the golden days - he had two weeks of sleeping through from about 11-7 which was AMAZING. That feels a long time ago now though!

He doesn't wake chattering. He has a big feed, then lies back in his basket, nice and contented, and tells me all his secrets and stories.

i really hope he does it again tonight for you!

Morning all

Pav your dd is so sweet!!

Laugs hoorah on the good sleep.

[whispers] the sleep thing is improving here too, last night he went from 10:30 through to 5:30 with only a bleary dummying from me at 4 Am hoping we're on the home stretch now as he can last and sleeps well until 4 now. Am hoping a few more nights will cancel out the 4am wake and then it's just allowing him to push the 5:30 a little later.
Also, as I didn't have any sterile bottles last night, the 10:30 feed was a bf. Just proves that the hungry baby stuff does nothing this end to make him last longer and it was so much easier!! If I stop the bottle now, do you think that will cause problems later at the childminder? He's taken a bottle no problems since he was about 2 months - is that long enough for it to have stuck? I enjoyed the bf last night, esp as I am now on a countdown to leaving him for work

I have a night out baby free on Friday for a friends birthday so looking forward to that.

Tonight is dh and I's first relate appointment, am nervous but glad it's now come through and we can make a start on things.

Scarlotti best of luck with relate, hope it goes well x

Lots of baby noises here. He also wakes and chats to himself in the morning. It's a lovely way to wake up .

I'm having to contemplate work here. I'm very lucky in that Alfie sleeps from 9pm-7am most nights and has done for quite a while so I feel physically capable but not sure my brain knows how to function in the real world any more.

Alfie has a squeal so high I think he communicates with the Bats.

scarlotti could you do a bottle for him at a different time of the day in a couple of days' time? Maybe this will show you if it stuck? Lucy refused the bottle a few weeks ago after I put her on exclusive bf for a while... but she was much younger then. Haven't tried since. Good luck with the counselling today - hope you manage to work things out soon.

laugs well done on the sleep! No such antics here, DD's longest stretch is from 7pm until 1am... Not that I take advantage of that one, just feels wrong to go to bed this early.

pavlov Bella sounds just the sweetest little girl

hobnob sorry your time for yourself got cut short.

This is actually something I was going to ask about: Lucy gave us a couple of sessions of histerical crying in the evenings when I asked DH to look after her. She would not stop unless I took her from him. I think it left him sad and unhappy that she doesn't respond to him. Is this just something that happens with them? I suggested he spends some more time playing with her and giving her baths (he works long hours and goes to gym and out cycling, so doesn't really get much time with her). I don't want her to rely entirely on me for comfort, but am not sure if it is perhaps too early to teach her to let go of me... What do you think?

Skorpion Alfie also has crying sessions with his Dad where only handing him back to me will calm him (he stops the moment he is handed over). These happen most frequently in the evenings and make dp very upset. Dp spends a lot of time with Alfie but if he wants his Mummy nothing will distract him and the screaming just gets worse and worse.

pav good luck to your dh on quitting the evil weed! Also, your dd sounds so cute, always makes me smile when you talk about her and Reuben!

Hobnob thats a shame about your Pilates, but like you say probably because of the jabs. You should definitely try again next week. Millie has her jabs on Thursday, I hope it doesn't cause her too much discomfort.

Well done to all the sleeping babies, for the first time in ages Millie slept from 7pm to 5am, whoop whoop! Hoping the jabs and going to Singapore don't mess up her sleeping patterns too much though.

scarlotti good luck with Relate, hope it goes well for you both.

Skorpion They all get a bit tetchy in the evenings and I'm sure it's nothing to do with your dh! How about you give Lucy to him when she's fed and happy so that they can have some fun time when she is not grizzly, then hopefully your dh will feel more confident dealing with her when she is not so happy.

It's a lovely sunny day again, might take Millie out for a walk shortly and make the most of it. Have a lovely day everyone!

I know, it's really heartbreaking and nothing will make it better, just mama. It upsets DH, too.

helips x-posted, good tip, thanks.

With DD, DH got very upset that he could not settle her, she needed mummy lots and there were times when she would scream in his arms until he passed her to me and then she was still and calm. This changed significantly at around 6 months, i think when DH was able to get actively involved in the weaning process and DD was less dependent on me milk only. He felt then that he was able to do more for her, and she responded much more to him, was able to be comforted by him and he felt she began to know him. Just so you know, it will get better for them, i promise! Funnily, this time around it is different. Reuben is happy to be calmed by DH, as long as it isn't food related, then the only thing that comforts him is milk. If he is tired, he will sleep on Daddy just as much as on mummy!

helips lucky you with the sun, its rainy and making the tv fuzzy during Jeremy kyle time horrible here!

Thanks for the well wishes.

skorpion it's around 4 months when they realise that they and mummy are actually two different people and so can be separated, hence the upset then when it happens. It's just a phase, albeit a tough one for daddies, so it will pass. Can you try getting him to play with her with you, then she'll always know you're there and will relax and enjoy it. Also explain to him about the 4 month thing as that will hopefully help him realise it's not personal.
Good idea re the bottle, am liking my new lazy nights!

We have a chatterbox here too, he's been rabbiting away for ages, but then his mummy is very chatty and hence so are the other 2 dc's!! We've thankfully now gone through the squealing stage - whilst it's funny to see them discover what they can do with their voices, it's also quite sharp on the ears at times!!

My boss just rang! Oh my god. The REAL WORLD is still there. She's coming to have lunch with me at the end of April as I am due to start taking on work in May. We had a really good chat about motherhood and my problems with PND. I am quite excited about starting working again. It'll be hard work but I miss that aspect of my life. Toby will be nearly 6 months by then.

I'm cooking carrots at the mo. Starting the weaning business. He's had some apple so far. He was really not sure what to make of it!

BBL great news, I remember working helped with my PND last time. Have also been quite excited since my work meeting at the thought of going back, will be tough leaving DS2 but the thought of something to tax my brain and get my teeth into is great!

Good luck with the weaning, hope Toby likes it!

Scarlotti how long did it take you until you felt your old self again when you had PND with your DS1? My problems began at Christmas so it is 2 months since I started not feeling right and I have good weeks and bad weeks (totally dependent on stress with Toby's skin or the chicken pox or DH's job, etc). I feel much better than I did in January but not my old self yet. Things aren't linear, which kind of surprised me as I thought once I started feeling better it'd be up and up. It seems to go in waves and some small down waves, some bigger, and the same with up waves. I'm so scared of the down times coming back though.

BBL mine started when DS2 was about 2-3 months and got steadily worse until I went on the AD's at around 6 months. I was on them for about 2-3 months, then went to counselling to support coming off them. I was probably 'better' by say 12 months ish. However, my dh wasn't very supportive and I didn't get any practical help so I was exceedingly sleep deprived. I went back to work full time when he was 6 months with a 1.25hr commute each way so there was a lot on my plate.
I too struggle with PMT and I think those of us that are susceptible to hormonal changes are more likely to suffer from these things. Look into herbal supplements as some can be really helpful. St John's Wort can help with the depression side of things, and there's a good one for hormones but I can't remember it - will try and then let you know!