june09 Weaning the babies and shifting the Mummy Tummy!!!

[Tee2072]

Here it is, Juners! New thread!!

Thank you all for your support just a very small post as I have food poisoning (thanks Mum) and am really struggling through the day. So annoying as I had so much I wanted to do. Aaliyah is being a star though, enjoying all the bed cuddles and drinking formula nicely from her cup

Poor you MrsMcJnr - I hope you feel better soon.

DD is feeling much better, although still a bit of a grouchy monkey. She went through from 7 til 5.50am so almost back to normal.

Hope the rest of you are okay xx

Hi All.

AwwMrsMc Hope you get better really sooon xx
Ineed glad the antibiotics are doing their job!

I feel like a bad mother here-- no real routine- but sort of follows the same pattern- so I suppose a "sort of" self sorted routine!!!

Weaning- he has a mix of my food- mainly veg- will venture into meat soon--- Fish is a bit of an issue- as I don't eat it- as the smell and taste makes me feel ill!! I do eat cod in the fish and chip variety- or a fish finger! lol I woudn't even know how to cook it- DH eats fish- so he'd have to feed him it! It one of the things I'd love to eat- but just can't!! We have no teeth yet- so still having pureed food, I gave him a rusk the other day- he crumbled it and gave to the dog- Rupert has a friend for life now!!!

Thanks for all the kind msgs- re- my stupid brain- on the BF front- I haven't fed yet today- beginning to get sore now! I think I'm going to go down the route of not "offering" the breast- but if he needs me then he can have me- if that makes sense, then he will hopefully decide he doesn't like the breast anymore and it will be easier than me taking it away from him x

Hope you are all well.

Tee hope things went well today xxx

ineed - interesting to see you give a snack at 10.30 with water. I think I may start to give something small at 10.00.

june - dates are proving a huge hit with F. Hope C likes them.

gauchita - And sometimes you just have to read the situation. Once M gets used to going to bed at a set time, they can fall asleep within minutes. F is asleep by the time he finishes the bottle. The daytime sleep can be tricky when something like teething or sickness makes them wake after an hour or less at lunchtime because then they get so tired by 4pm and are crying and desperately want to sleep. I find if that is the case 15mins quick nap is enough to get him through to bedtime. Today he couldn't sleep long at lunchtime because of his sore teeth and so I he napped from 4.30 - 5pm - I didn't think he would be able to have supper without it, and so then he couldn't sleep at 7, but did fall asleep at 8pm quite quickly so no big deal. It is wonderful when he has a lovely big 2-2.5 hour sleep at lunchtime, because I get lots of work done and he is happy all afternoon and then collapses asleep at 7.

effielou - it sounds like you are having a great time. No routine is definitely not 'bad mother' - my problem was that I have children who love to be awake and hate to go to sleep, and so if I don't follow some routine, they just stay awake far too long and then collapse asleep at 4pm, which just doesn't work. Fish fingers are a gift from the gods. I try to get enthusiastic about cooking for children but struggle so fish fingers are a good way to tick the 'fish' box. Your approach to BF sounds really sensible, have a general vision, but take one day at a time.

Sadly F is so used to the bottle that he is a lousy breastfeeder now so I just express one bottle a day. I get sad about it, but I struggle a bit hormonally/weight wise while breastfeeding (I get soooo hungry) so in some ways am happy to be breaking free a bit.

bigcar - how is the new iron? Lean, mean and a joy to use?

ooops - gotta go. Long distance phone call......

Ohh amazing news - F is crawling!!!! I am stunned - he couldn't even competently roll over and back until Jan 6th and he crawled on Saturday....obviously the basic kind of lift bum up and drag knee around sideways and drag himself forward, but I think that is crawling, isn't it?

bye

strawberysam - how are you doing honey?

just marking my placeand a 'me me' message alert!sorry!A is not sleeping more than 1.5 in a stretch overnight, 4-5hrs total between 8-6, for the last 10 days.Up from 11-12 then 1-4 last night I am shattered. MIL is now here-a godsend. Don't know what it is, cold/teeth/reflux playing up/new cot/combo of the above? Downstairs neighbours complained about the crying

Will catch up tomorrow. Thinking of you all and hoping there are babies sleeping at your house, and you are all ok.

Morning All- 3 days in a row not bad!!! lol

Snow sounds like your having abit of a rough time x sending lots of sleepy thoughts!! Hopefully you will get some rest now your MIL is here- then you'll be able to cope with anything! As for the neighbour- its not for ever and they can put up with it- if all else fails buy them some earplugs!! With Rupert ( he had reflux ) I raise up the end of his mattress ( using some old bedding/towels) it seems to keep him comfy- it also helps with colds as t stops them from getting so stuffy! My friends baby ( shes 3mths now) has had a constant cold and hasn't slept- I suggested se buy a vapouriser- she did and has had a whole weeks worth of sleep!
Hope things get better soon xxxx

daisy thanks for the lovely comments! BF yesterday consisted of 2 5 min feeds- 1st at about 4ish- then 1 in the evening!! I gave him one this morning- purely to relieve the "pressure" So its going quite well- I'm not feeling dreadful about it- so that the main thing and Ruperts not hating me for it!! Its such an emotional thing i find- I feel like I'm letting him down- but on the other hand- I've nearly fed him for 8months- which is the longest I've gone- so I'm happy with that!!! Its also that lovely mum and baby thng that noone else can have- but as my gp said- hes had all the good stuff and whats more important keep BF or for my kids and DH to have a healthy Mum but I love it!!! Boohoo xxlol

Hope you are all well xxxx lots of love xxxx

afternoon all

gauchita, you had sun! we had a lovely shade of grey, much the same today, wonder if it'll snow again tonight, what is it about wednesdays? Did you get that dummy holder in the end?

MrsMcJnr, hope you're feeling better today

ineed, pleased to hear dd is much better and sleep is returning

effie, we only have a routine of sorts here too, it's harder when you have other kids to run around after and organise and one day isn't the same as the next. Why is it we get so emotional about how we feed, the babies never seem bothered?! Love that top photo on your profile and all that red hair in your family, it's gorgeous

daisy, actually it is a pretty good iron it's a steam generator one as was the one that died so zips through everything fairly quickly. It has it's own disco lights well, actually it's supposed to be mood lighting and gently changes colours that shine through the water tank thing. Totally pointless unless you iron in the dark, but it was cheap in the sales, wonder why Still hate ironing though I get really hungry when bf too, I'm certainly not one that gets back into shape quicker bf, although you could say depends on what shape you mean, a round sort of shape maybe Well done F on crawling

snow, what mean neighbours you have! A sounds like he's having a rough time at the mo, hopefully it's just a change in routine that will settle fairly quickly

tee, how'd A get on?

skill, how's work going?

strawberry, did your new bed arrive in the end?

Dd3s new moulds turned up and thankfully look fine [relieved] they are red glitter in a clear mould so not the solid red I thought they may be! Still won't be letting dh go next time. E had another unsettled night again, I think it's just the ear infection, don't know how some of you lovely ladies manage this on a regular basis.

waves to all

so annoyed - paid £7.95 to ensure some extra In the Night Garden plates etc arrived at PIL whilst DH was still there to bring them home and the company tried to deliver them but FIL was in the shower so missed it and they were told that they had to wait 24 hours for it to reach the mail collection depot what a waste of money and just my luck and how do i deal now with 2 children without plates, cups, blowers and party bags

Hi all!

Mrsmc, oh how frustrating for you! Are DH and DS on his way back now then?

Bigcar, well, sun on Monday but yesterday we had fog ALL day It looked so odd! 12pm and fog all over Yes, the dummy holder arrived on 21st December the thing is by then we had already complained to the lovely lady, who had no idea of our order of anything and so placed another order then and there. Soooo, now we have 2 Glad you liked DD3's moulds! (poor DH otherwise!)

Effie, hi! Glad to hear the BF weaning is going quite well. As Bigcar said, it's always us who worry too much and babies don't even seem to notice

Snow, ((hug)) You must be exhausted, pleased to hear your MIL is there to help now so that you can catch up on some sleep.

Daisy, I was actually quite surprised to see how just after a few days the new routine would fall into place and she was OK with it. It's still like that BUT during the day only nights are still a bit off, but I'll stick to it! Well done F for crawling!!

Ineed, good to hear DD is feeling better

Tee, hope things went well on Monday.

Hi to all Juners!

After a horrible night Monday night when M was up 6 times! last night was not that bad and she was up only 3 Oh well...

Hope you have a lovely day ladies! Nap time now! (for M at least )

Waves!!!

Actually, just worked out that it is called 'creeping' and not really crawling. DD never did anything like that. Basically he moves something like a slug crossed with a caterpillar.

Hello, I hope you do not mind me joining you all late in the thread.

My dd was born 8th June 09, I also have a ds who was 2 yesterday.

Things are going well. Poor DD does not have much of a routine tbh, she has lots of little naps in the day, as she tends to get woken up by ds a lot, but she sleeps well of a night as a result I suppose. She does not have a set bedtime, although she does tend to settle downstairs as soon as ds has gone to bed, and then I take her up with me, as we co sleep, and even if she wakes she has a feed and goes back to sleep.

She has started weaning, but she still nurses a lot. Although because she has started on solids, i really miss those no smell bf poops lol.

Hi All

Welcome TheArcaneMommy My DS (3rd child( was born on 1st June and we are the same, sleeps on me until I go to bed- i give him now a FF ( trying to wean off the breast ) and then sleeps from 11pmish to 7am ish!!! I too miss the smell of BF poo-- this morning it was green sludge, thanks to Ellas Kitchen Spinach, pear and peas!! yukki!!!!

Hahahahaha guess what- I was asked for ID yesterday when I was trying to buy a bottle of wine in tescos!!! lol- She said I have to look older than 25-- I was 35 last week!! I'd had a bad day and went to a PTA meeting- so on marks instructions- he said get some wine to wind down!!! ( mum issues again) but I came home with just some apples as all I had was my maternity exemption card and a toysrus loyality card!! If it wasn't so funny- the girl serving looked about 18- i would have been cross!! lol Instead I had a bottle of pear cider and now a dreadful headache!!!

Hope you all are well- wish this wet snow would go away!! lol

afternoon all

MrsMcJnr, what a pain, do none of the supermarkets nearby sell that kind of thing, Asda and Tesco do here. Hope they're not too upset.

gauchita, that sounds a bit of a performance, I suppose at least she tried to sort it for you eventually. How's the sleep going? E slept through last night, fingers crossed we are back to normal now!

daisy, I'm sure it counts as crawling, just not by it's strictest definition E made it into the kitchen today, he got past his chair that I put across the door so I followed him to see where he went, should have just shut the stairgate we have over the door

TheArcaneMommy of course you can join us, you are most welcome A belated happy birthday to your ds. E (ds2) is constantly woken by my older dcs, afternoons he gets a nap when dd3 is at nursey and then I can have a cup of tea in peace!

effie, you should definitely be most flattered that's great, unfortunately noone would mistake me for being under 25, shame you didn't get the wine though! No snow here for once, never thought I'd be pleased to wake up to rain but I couldn't face telling the dcs school was off again, they've signed up for school dinners on a wednesday and have missed 2 already, ds1 was not amused last week, wasn't bothered by school, just wanted roast lunch

strawberry, glad to hear you made it to your group and the bed people have finally sorted themselves, we got a mattress cheap in the sale from argos but their delivery was great so maybe try them next time lol Hope the work situation sorts itself out so you can just do 3 days, do you have family to look after L? The important thing for now is that the bills are paid and you have some money to do nice things as a family, you never know, things may change in the future and you can reassess your plans.

Dd1 has her last uni interview today at Chichester, well it's actually Bognor for her campus, right next to Butlins apparently, she was convinced it would snow like it did when she went to Canterbury! She should be in the interview now, fingers crossed this one goes as well as the other two I've been meaning to wd40 my pushchair for about 7 months, it's been sticking and hard to put up, FINALLY did it at lunch time, got a few odd looks outside school doing it but I'd found the tin of wd40 in the car. Small things make me happy

waves to all

bigcar Good luck to your DD1 in her interview xxx Its really wet slushy snow here in sunny Swindon I've had enough now!! it takes sooooooo much time to get DS1 dressed up and Rupert swaddled in snowsuit and raincovers! Hes now out of the carrycot- so I have straps and all sorts to contend witlol I was hoping we'd have a big covering of snow before we woke up- then DH would have had a snow day!!

I will be on here lots next week-- DH goes to London all week- and DD is away on a school residential from wednesday- so it will be just me and my boyz!! needless to say I am dreading it!! lol

Bye for now x

strawberrysam - it is really strange how conflicting emotions can be with a baby. As you say, you can be completely in love with being a mother and find it the most fulfilling & rewarding 'job' ever and yet at the same time can be very low and have trouble seeing how things are going to improve. I felt like that, but it's so hard to explain and really I didn't want to say anything to people as it sounded as if I wasn't coping and in fact I thought I was doing an amazing job - as DD was quite challenging at first.

I don't want to sound like I'm preaching, but several things helped:
try and find a way to get some more sleep (sleeplessness was at the heart of my problems)
starting to get out of the house without DD - going out with friends at night or simply to the movies - maybe just once a fortnight get out for a couple of hours - it lets you get some release from the subconcious stress of constantly thinking/worrying if baby ok/about to need something etc etc (especially if your husband isn't working as you can get out for long walks without baby)
exercise and make a little time for some hobbies
long baths when possible
for me a routine (I know you don't want one). It doesn't have to be that regimented, but it actually gives you more freedom as you know that you can go out and do stuff (because they are feed/watered/changed and alert for a couple of hours) and I truly believe now that they are happy knowing what is going to happen and when - with a little flexibility

Just some ideas from a second timer. It's really odd but I went away for a long weekend when DD was 16 months and I was feeling a bit 'swamped' with it all, and I came back wanting a second child because I felt so refreshed and so much more capable after the relaxation (and very proud of what I had acheived)!!

Thank you all for the welcome.

I was originally due back at work the first week in Feb, but I have extended my mat leave to the full 52 weeks, so I go back at the end of May, which is quite a relief.

I was diagnosed with PND when dd was 4 months old, we had a shaky start when she was born with breastfeeding, as she had a tongue tie, that made feeding her a big issue, and it felt like we had to fight to get it sorted.

My DH was home till just before Christmas as he was made redundant in April, but luckily he started a new job, at first I think it helped him being at home, but the longer it went on, the more I left most of the care of dd to him. She was also a bit of a shock when we found out about her, we had tried for over 2 years for ds, and then when he was 8 months i fell pregnant with DD, despite ds being breastfed and i had not had a period, i was still on Mat leave! i was only back at work for 3 months before i went off on mat leave again!

i hope to go back part time! it is strange, as you say StrawberrySam, despite studying at uni to be in the career I want, and years of working towards it, now all I want is to be able to stay home with my children! Not an option really, but part time is, so im going to negotiate that soon.

Morning all!

TAmommy, welcome to the thread! Happy belated bday to your DS.

Daisy, tiredness is awful and it does affect you even when you think you're fine, you're so right there.

Effie, we'll be seeing you loads next week then LOL at not being able to buy the wine! But bigcar is right, take it as a compliment

Bigcar, hope DD's interview went great Glad to hear E is sleeping better

Strawberry, oh I hate hate hate when deliveries keep you waiting for things and stuck at home but glad to hear you now have a lovely bed The return to work issue is a minefield indeed, as you say. Everything crossed here for your DH to get a new job soon

Hi to all Juners!

Well, over here we didn't have a good day yesterday. M was grumpy a lot during the day for no apparent reason, no temperature, etc and had good spells during the day so I didn't know what to make of it. THEN bedtime came and it was hell She doesn't usually have a problem going to bed per se... but she yesterday she was exhausted but refusing to go to sleep. I spent 2hs trying to put her to bed and I was losing my mind, ladies DH wasn't here, he'd gone to a friend's house to watch a football match, and I just felt sooooo tired I decided to put her in her cot, sit beside her, stroke her face and try to see if she'd fall asleep that way (I read it was one of the "methods"). Oh dear... she cried and cried but I felt I couldn't go back and pick her up as that would probably send the wrong message to her and it'd backfire so I just stuck with it... she finally fell asleep 51 mins later (Daisy, you were right, their cry is different along the way).

I couldn't help but start crying afterwards, DH arrived just then and I was just so sad (and tired). What made me feel even worse was that she woke up twice afterwards (during the night) so now I think maybe it didn't work? I didn't know if I had to do the same if she woke up so I just fed her and she went back to sleep.

I guess it was only a matter of time until the lack of sleep caught up with me so...

Does anybody know what is best now? I thought I had to do the same tonight but now I'm not sure I thought maybe those of you who have tried a similar method might know...

Anyway, lots to do so waves to all!!! Hope you have a lovely day!

xxx

Hi All

gauchita ( just worked out you were Naat-- lol ) I read a book when Flynn was a baby called the No Cry Sleep Solution- by Elizabeth Pantley- www.pantley.com/elizabeth/

She writes about how to get the baby into a routine and NOT to do the cry thing!! It was a great way- I tried the cry thing with Flynn and it made me so upset that i was letting him cry!! By the time I'd found the book, Flynn was a bit too old- sort of old dog new tricks!!! The book seemed so much kinder on the baby and of course the mum. I will re-read when Rupert goes into his own room in a couple of weeks! It might be worth looking at the book- the library might have a copy of it!! Amazon have copies too! I hope that helps a little bit!! A lack of sleep is torture! But she will get there in the end- honest!!!

I went to see my mental health nurse today- only to find the appointment is next week--- what a numpty I am!! got the right time tho!! lol

i have a stinking cold today- so off to make some sweet tea!! would like to go back to bed- but no chance!!

take care all of you xxxxxxx

gauchita - It's so hard to really understand over the internet. I only had to do it once, after she wasn't drinking in the night anymore but was waking and crying to be cuddled. Once I had tried everything else and was on my last legs I let her cry and it broke the habit.

Do you get a gut instinct about what feels like the right next step for you?

Effie, thanks for that link, I'll have a look as soon as I have a min

Daisy, I'm just confused... Yesterday I did it because I didn't know what else to do, DH was not there and I was really tired. I knew it was going to be hard but stuck with it. The thing is she woke up 45 mins later and then twice more... If she had slept for a longer stretch at least I guess I wouldn't feel so confused. Everyone I know that has tried the method has seen results immediately (either that night or the following one) so I don't know. Yesterday I thought that maybe I was being too over-protective and that maybe I was just not helping her... Ugh, I'm rambling and I don't think I'm making sense here, sorry! On a different note, today for the first time she took a long nap after lunch (1.30hs) And I just passed out in the rocking chair (she was in her cot).

Gauchita jusy quickly wanted to post that we're having intermittent problems with sleep too, very tiring.
C just fell asleepp in my arms after no nap since her (first and) last one at 10:30 (for an hour).
if you find solution let me know!!

hey to everyone else (including newcomer arcane ;)

I suspect it will take a bit longer.....she needs to get better at taking a really good nap at lunchtime....and just to get used to all the timings....and keep taking her to her bedroom at the same time each night, feed, turn off lights and then cuddle or whatever you usually do (but in the dark)....in time I really really believe she will just want to fall asleep at that time, especially as she takes more food in and gets more exercise - it may just take a bit longer. Are you putting her to bed at 8pm? What time does she wake and nap at the moment?

gauchita - I feel a bit uncomfortable about giving advice on the internet. I should probably shut up about my routine. It just happened to work wonderfully well for me. It still took time, but when they started sleeping 30-45 mins (2 - 2.5 hours after normal waking time) and then 1.5 - 2.5 hours (2 - 2.5 hours after that - at approx same time each day) and then going to bed approx 4-5 hours after that - at same time each night) - eventually going to sleep at night just became so easy as they were naturally tired and just fell asleep in my arms.

But you always must do what feels right for you at the time and taken into account what has happened in past 24 hours, whether you think they are teething, a bit poorly etc etc. Sometimes they might want a 5 min nap late afternoon just to get them through to bedtime if they didn't sleep well at lunchtime etc.

I hope it's going well and last night was ok.

Now I shall shut up about me and my routine (I promise).

I have two slightly unwell children and am very very tired so may not be online for a few days, as want to nap as much as possible at the weekend. Have a lovely weekend all and hello arcane