May 2009 - loved-up new mums and/or sleep-deprived zombies this way please

[pulapula]

Here's a nice new thread for us to share our experiences with our new LOs.

[Belgianchocolates]

looby no wonder you're Hope your parents come soon. Anyone would be upset if their parents didn't take much interest in their grand child.

spangle know what you mean with the feeling jealous of that bottle. That happened to me with ds and dd1

C is being a pain again now. After a lovely morning she's decided she wants boob all afternoon. Thing is, she fed for about 15 min at 4 and then went into comfort sucking mode. If only I could detach my boob and put it in the pram with her . Knowing my luck she wont like a dummy, because it's not skin, IYKWIM. Time for the sling I think...

[llareggub]

I have now lost all patience. If my mother does anything else to irritate me I will not be able to hold in my reaction. Please pass me a cocktail, I so need it! She is really, really annoying me!!!

[pulapula]

whats your mum done llareggub? i'm curious...

belgian- the sling is a great invention. i should really put S in his but i am quite happy on the sofa for now. S does have a dummy but sometimes he doesnt want it which i assume is when hes looking for milk. it does help sometimes just to give your boobs a rest. i just wish i could settle him in his basket or somewhere not on me as i'm sure i have things i should be doing e.g. laundry.

[Belgianchocolates]

pula So nice to hear someone else is in the same boat. I was having a cry about it with dh just now, who doesn't seem to understand why I'm upset. Exept for this a.m. C seems to be wanting to feed all the time. I thought ds was bad with his 2h feeds, but C is even worse. She seems to feed, not go to sleep, be awake for 45min, then want to sleep but also feed. I'm never sure whether it's because she wants to suckle herself to sleep or whether she's really hungry, because I can hear her tummy rumble sometimes. She also seems to keep her feeds really short and so I'm a bit worried that she's only getting foremilk and that's why she's not lasting very long on a feed. I'm trying everything to keep her going during a feed, but it's not working. I've tickled her, blown in her face, taken her off and winded her. Nothing works to keep her suckling properly for a decent amount of time, it's soooo frustrating. On the other hand, there's no problem with her weight and she produces plenty of nice nappies.

Right, there she is again. Like I predicted, 1h 15min since last feed.

[Blottedcopybook]

I honestly feel ready to either seriously injure someone or just cry. DS1 is severely trying my patience by being a thoughtless twonk - in the last year, four kids on our street have had their bikes stolen when they've left them lying instead of bringing them in so F has had it drilled into him that the bike gets brought in when he's finished with it. I even let him keep it behind the front door so he's not having to lock it in a shed or anything! So, despite my very clear warnings about it he left his bike outside without me noticing while we went to the shops and now I've grounded him for it.

That's bad enough, but he's now gone upstairs and dumped all his school clothes, bag, toys and crap in the middle of the bedroom floor which DH and I spent hours today tidying, hoovering and shampooing so we could build the boys' new beds up tomorrow. I'm giving up my rest time to go and stand in the pouring rain tomorrow and watch his school sports day before coming back home and entertaining the three little 'uns so DH can build up the new beds and DS can't even respect that. DH has just had to give him into trouble AGAIN for squirting water all over the bathroom floor.

I give up. He's more work than the other three combined.

[llareggub]

It has gone from bad to worse. My mother and I have argued and she has stormed out, and has gone for good. Lots of things have been said and I think it will be a long time before there is a reconcilation. A big part of me feels very relieved that I no longer have to pretend at a mother daughter relationship.

Phew.

[pulapula]

belgianchocs- i know what you mean about crying about it- it's so frustrating. If S feeds for less than 10 mins then i know he'll want another feed in an hour or so, so i have started nappy changing mid-feed and then can usually get another 10-15 mins out of him. I also sometimes put him on the same boob again if he hasn't had a big feed so he will get less of the foremilk. When he's tired he also likes to suck so its hard knowing what he wants. When i tried to settle him in his basket at lunchtime i gave up as he was just getting too upset. He is however in his basket at the moment, but very restless so not sure how long he'll sleep. I've had to pick him up a couple of times and give him a few backrubs and he's only been asleep 20 mins! Guess that's what he's used to when he's asleep on me. Last night we co-slept and he fed 10.40-12 (on and off with me trying to settle him in the basket twice plus a nappy change), 1.30, 2, 3.15, 5.15 and up at 7am and i'm sure it was because we were both falling asleep and he wasn't having proper feeds. I was just too tired to stay awake and make sure he fed properly .

[pulapula]

llareggub- just seen your post. Sorry I don't know what to say. I really don't like it when families fall out, and I know you say part of you feels relieved, but a part of me hopes that now things have been aired, that a reconciliation can happen at some stage in the future. I am sure things will be very raw for a long while- sorry it has come to this. Look after yourself and your boys.

[Jennster]

llaregub sorry to hear you've fallen out so finally with your mum.

Blotted I'm with you on the frustration with the other dc. Mine are being little **s. I swear if they throw food and drink on the floor again, or blatently ignore me and do the opposite, or hurt each other deliberately, then I'm going to scream. Oh no I've already done that.

[pulapula]

My older DCs are a bit of a nightmare at the moment. They've just had their 2 days in nursery so that means 5 days at home now! I spend a lot of time with DS2 and DH is in charge of DD and DS1 and sometimes i think he is softer than i would be and they are pushing the boundaries. That's partly why i want to settle S in his basket so i can help out rather than try and issue warnings from the sofa.

[Jennster]

pula I am being so unbelievably short tempered with mine. They've not had pudding 2 nights on the trot and went to bed without a story last night. I hate punishing them with no story. Probably something to do with this cold and lack of sleep.

[Febes]

Hi everyone. Well I have caught up with some of the thread but not everything. Congrats for all new babies. Blotted it sounds like we were at it at the same time. I love the name Greer too.

Well my birth story. Unfortunately it wasn't the quick labour most of you lucky ladies have had.

My waters broke at 10pm and I rang the labour ward and they wanted me in for monitoring so we went in at about 12.30 after DH finished watching his rugby show.
They monitored me and then again as they weren't happy with the first time and then they wanted someone to confirm the breaking of the waters. I was a bit as I bloody knew it had gone. Anyway as I wasn't contracting they said I could go home. We got home at 3am and on the way home I started contracting and they were quite intense and close together. I got home and tried going to bed but they were about 3 minutes apart and strong so after about half an hour of that I got up and we went in. They put me in a delivery suite and gave me the gas and left me to it. I carried on contracting strongly and at 6ish the MW came in to check me and used a spatulum to avoid infection because my waters had gone. She was really rude and said she couldn't see my cervix. I was completely gutted so rang my mum to come in as she had arrived the day before. DH went to get mum and dropped her off and went home to sleep for a bit. Mum came in and said stop taking the gas and start breathing through the contractions. The staff changed shift and my new MW was so nice and explained what was going on and the plan of action she examined me and said I was 3 cm. She left me to it and told me to get active so me and mum spent next 4 hours walking though the corridors, bouncing on the birthing ball and being active as possible. After 4 hours I was still 3 cm . I also took ages to dilate with DD and my sister did the same with her DS so maybe a family thing. DH came back in. They put me on a drip at 2ish to induce the contractions and by 4 I was 4/5cm I tried pethidine as I was knackered and sore and losing faith in myself. At 6pm I asked them to check me again and I was 7cm so I asked for an epidural and luckily he came really quickly and was amazing. I had an epidural with DD and didn't get on with it so well so this one was much better.
At about 7pm I started feeling like pushing and they said not yet but after not too much longer I was really feeling it and in the end had about 3 contractions and he was born. They put him straight on my chest and I feed him straight away. We didn't know we were having a boy so it was such a nice surprise. DH cut the cord. I had a slight tear but no need for stitches. So although I aren't good at dilating I think quite good at pushing .

Anyway glad that day is over but it was totally worth it. DS is an angel baby so far. My milk has come in with no probs and he is a champian feeder and calm and lovely. We co-slept last night which went really well.

Sorry no personal messages but will be reading thread more tomorrow and hopefully catch up then.

[Febes]

Sorry that was mammoth.

[LoobyLou36]

belgian pula I know what you mean about LO not feeding for long on the boob M struggles to feed for long without falling asleep but I really struggle to get her to settle in her basket afterwards. Night time feeds are especially difficult

My mum and dad did turn up after all they were an hour late but at least they made it. They only live about a mile away and its taken them nearly 4wks to come and see her.

[flippineck]

Hello all! Sorry I haven't been around for a while, my mum is here this week so I haven't realy felt able to get on here. Oh, and there's the new baby thing going on too, she seems to take up a bit of time! pula - lovely new thread, thanks.

Just a few bits of catching up:
llaregub - sorry to hear about the problems with your mum, but in some way it must be good to have that pressure off.
1stMrsF - well done on BF twins, that is impressive!
dandy - YANBU! Sorry to hear that you have been advised not to have any more, it must seem so final somehow.
interpreting cries - still working on that one! When I had DD1 I read loads of things that said you soon get to know what cries mean, I'm sure it took me nearly a year toget the basics and even now Ihave no idea some times. No hope for DD2, poor girl.
blotted - lol at your placenta! I haven't kept mine, but I did have a good look, it was fascinating, absolutely huge which made me laugh a bit for some reason. It felt really odd delivering it too, a very odd sensation.
wipes - cotton wool and water here too, and then once we start on the cloth nappies we'll use the reusable wipes again.

Well, everything seems to be ok here so far. A is well - I think! - and the CMW is coming tomorrow for the last (10 day) check. My mum is being sort of helpful, she's done loads of things, but odd jobs that I didn't really need/want doing; it's kind of her but not helpful - am I ungrateful?! She's also been entertaining DD1 loads too and I'm worried about what will happen next week when I'm on my own with the two of them.

A feeds roughly every 2-3 hours at the moment, not ideal in terms of sleep but I can live with it for now though. She seems to be quite colicky now, it started two days ago and she's really disturbed and uncomfortable between about 11 and 2 every night. Any top suggestions? Positions for winding? I've got some Dentinox colic stuff to try tonight.

I'm feeling ok, my stitches seem to have healed really well - I had quite a lot of trouble with my stitches after DD1 so was nervous about them this time.

[pulapula]

hi flippineck- the only winding positions i use are the over-the-shoulder with arms down your back or the up-like-a-soldier as the MW described it- you put your hand under their chin and push their back in to make them as straight as possible. I've read for colicky babies you should also lie them across your knees.

[Blottedcopybook]

Llare - I can empathise with the Mum situation. Hope you're okay and not dwelling on it.

Jennster and Pula I'm so so glad it's not just me. DS2 and DD are playing up a bit too but nothing unmanageable for now. DS1 is just doing my head in - I expect a little more from him because he's going to be 8 in a couple of weeks but his Dad & paternal Granny keep babying him so he's just so "Duuuuuuhh" half the time.

DH spent this evening digging a big hole, tipping my placenta in and potting a cherry tree over it. I swear I am so lucky I found him, he really does take all of this new age bollocks in his stride

[Momino]

llareggub, sorry about your mum. hope you're ok.
looby, glad your parents finally made it.
febes, lovely birth story. MW put harper straight away on me as well. what a lovely memory, my eyes were closed but i felt her warmth and she was yelling healthily .
spangle, hope you had a good night out.
older DC's - mine were pretty good today luckily but have generally been miserable, hard work. i think they're testing me or resenting me from spending so much time with new baby . pula, like you i've got the DD's 2 days at nursery and am so relieved for the break and it's good for them as well.

[SesHasFinallyBecomeAMum]

Finally found post natal thread and the time for a quick post!!

llareggub - sorry to hear about situation with your mum. Doesn't sound easy for you but from what you've said, I can understand the feeling of relief too.

feeding - I'm with those of you that feel like a permanently attached feeding machine. DH is also feeling frustrated that he can't help out with the feeding and if I make any indication of frustration or pain when DS latches, DH now just tells me that I could FF instead!

Don't know how those of you with older DC manage, I really don't! I know we'll want a 2nd at some point and as I'm 36, won't hang around too long but honestly, how do you cope???!

[Momino]

just a quick note to say hello. trying to post between both threads and now forgetting where I've posted!

Had more sleep last night but more tired today... that doesn't make sense . Harper took a bottle of expressed last eve with no prob , so i'll be able to delegate one of the feeds to DH. maybe i should pick the 2am one for him!

gotta get out of bed now so i can throw on clothes before DDs wake up and take up all my time and attention. hope they're as good/co-operative as they were yesterday so we can make it to nursery in time for the 930am snack .

hope all of you and little ones are well and will catch up a bit later.

[Momino]

Ses, having a 1st DC is a huge adjustment and you have no idea how you'd manage a 2nd LO. but if/when DC2 comes along, somehow you do manage and you can't imagine life with just the one anymore. Now, with DD3, I know, somehow she'll fit in and we'll manage fine.

i think with each arrival, my sleep was just as deprived, my patience may have been a bit stronger with just DD1 but it really is all relative.

aw, go on. I'll have a 4th .

no really. just kidding. really [pleads with fate].

[Reggiee]

FEBES what a lovely story, despite it being a bit longer than some on here.

LLARE hope you're feeling ok. Don't know the background but you need to do what feels right for you. Big .

SPANGLE did you get out last night? How was the film? And did you keep thinking you'd left someone behind somewhere....

FLIPPIN I use the exact same winding positions as PULA described. BTW swaddling worked wonders for us during the really unsettled periods.

Like many here, I feel particularly tired today. Yawn. Think I'll take a gentle stroll later to M&S to top up on their meals for a tenner deal . Would you believe B is exactly 4 weeks today . Can't believe how time has gone. Got him weighed yesterday and he put on 1lb 5oz in a week - that's 3oz a day!!

Hope everyone has a good day!

[Reggiee]

FEBES what a lovely story, despite it being a bit longer than some on here.

LLARE hope you're feeling ok. Don't know the background but you need to do what feels right for you. Big .

SPANGLE did you get out last night? How was the film? And did you keep thinking you'd left someone behind somewhere....

FLIPPIN I use the exact same winding positions as PULA described. BTW swaddling worked wonders for us during the really unsettled periods.

Like many here, I feel particularly tired today. Yawn. Think I'll take a gentle stroll later to M&S to top up on their meals for a tenner deal . Would you believe B is exactly 4 weeks today . Can't believe how time has gone. Got him weighed yesterday and he put on 1lb 5oz in a week - that's 3oz a day!!

Hope everyone has a good day!

[Reggiee]

Excuse the double post. Trigger finger....

[emmabemmasmom]

Oh fun! I didn't know this was here lol

Just bookmarking, and looking forward to finding time to read the posts

Just posted on the other thread about my struggles...