Dec 08 mums - from rolling to sitting and everything inbetwean

[waitinggirl]

there i've done it - hope that is ok.

Films: have you seen My Man Godfrey (the Carole Lombard version) and The Lady Eve? Also for feel-good films I love the Buena Vista Social Club. Or Wings of Desire (again if you haven't seen it). No clue on recent films . We have Love Film and are watching the Sopranos.

Veggie can you ask your friend what kind of groceries she buys? I can't decided and everytime I do a shop online at Ocado I ditch it in favour of Tesco as Ocado comes out so expensive. It's the meat and fish (we eat loads of salmon and tuna) that bumps up our bill, and they rarely have offers on cheerfulness. I def think the produce is nicer so i'd much rather shop there.... Can I do an little poll and ask what everyone roughly spends on groceries per week or per month and then who you use? lol - skip if you can't be assed or rather not say!

Still waking at 3am here, but naps very well during the day - 2 - 3 naps anywhere from 40 mins to hour and a half to sometimes 2 and a half hours (one nap yesterday ) howeverI think the prob is what someone said JJ or Spot? I think he needs to be kept awake more during the day.....

argh, crap night again. I need some advice on how to deal with sudden multiple wakings. dd was only waking once a night and would feed back to sleep. now she is waking three times and nothing will settle her but a full feed. because she feeds better when sleepy she is now getting the majority of her milk during the night and is not hungry in the morning. It's been the same for three nights now. so what do I do? I feel that the more I night feed the more I re-enforce the pattern but I not what else to do. simple cuddles get her v angry. Help!

Pmk - we shop ocado but try to find the Tesco price match items. Also we get meat from our butcher. Our weekly ocado comes to about £90 for all food (incl a lor of fish), alcohol, cleaning products and nappies but no meat and not all our veggies (I buy salad and fruit locally).

We do all our online shopping with Asda. Never had any problems. Ocado looks really good but don't deliver here. We have had loads of problems with Tesco so just stopped using them.

Just a quick message to say hi to everyone . I am still here lurking occasionally (thanks for remembering me LadyT). I was hoping to be able to catch up properly this am while DD is at pre-school but once again I have run out of time. Hang in there all those with the non-sleeping babies!

arti She sounds like DS, 3 nights now of 3-5 wakings. On occasion he will be rocked back to sleep but usually wants feeding. The thing is I have cut back on the BF and DS has 2 sometimes 3 bottles a day of FF. I'm wondering if my supply is dwindling away and therefore he is not getting a good or full fat feed from me at bedtime IYSWIM. I'll see how it goes for a night or two more but may have to give him a bottle before bed, if my supply is going. It will probably signal the end of my BF but I think I'm okay with this. My boobs have gone a bit smaller in the past week or so and I very rarely have any feeling of fullness - anyone any thoughts??

I might be joining some of you in the TTC this year!!!

arti - that is EXACTLY what P is doing. She's been waking more and more at night and will not go back to sleep without a feed, then in the day she's barely touching her puree (2 mouthfuls max), and will BF for very short snacks if I offer it but she gets so distracted she's not bothered for it. I thought it was post-viralness but maybe it's more a development thing? I'm getting a bit worn down by it now She is 6 months old today and I guess I thought we'd be past our 2 hourly wakings, not moving to one hourly!
PMK we shop at Asda for our main shop and spend about £60 per week for the four of us, but need top ups of bread and milk (and chocolate!) through the week, and we usually get one takeaway each week too .
I've been to Tiny Tunes this morning which was noisy but fun - P seemed to enjoy it! Then we went to town and picked up out mugs that we made last week - well footprinted - for Father's day and my dad's birthday. They're so cute! I'm off to parent and toddler group now just to give p lots of stimulation to try to make her more active...more hungry...more tired...and sleep well tonight! Not holding out much hope!
And Cambridge ladies - watch out! The radio informs me there is a 5 foot friendly python on the loose!

OOOOOOOOHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!

My friend has just come round to do a PG test and she is PG!!!!!!!!!!! Due Valentine's Day!!! And she gets married on Saturday!!!!!!!!!!!!

I am so glad for this thread trace it makes me feels that DS is not on his own - he has plenty of virtual friends doing the exact same thing wearing their mummies out

BTW DS is VERY hit and miss with his food. When we started he loved Sweet Potato, now will hardly touch it

Re waking and feeding babies, can your partners take over for a portion of the night? I got fed up with trying to settle DS2 last night (he'd fed, he had a clean nappy, he just wanted to snack all night), DH got him to sleep in 5 mins once I'd gone downstairs. Worth a try?

arti, daisy, trace - yes yes yes!!! last night was the worst ever since she was 4 weeks old. in the deepest darkest depths i really felt i could do something bad to her, but didn't, of course. i'm not particularly enamoured of my daughter at the moment. went to baby massage, though, where everyone made such a fuss of my smiley charming daughter - reminded me she is actually lovely.

my plan is to try to feed feed feed as much as possible during the day, to encourage good sleeping during the day (even if that means going out less during the day) which should encourage good sleep and less feeding at night. if a few days of that don't work, i will start solids (which i feel passionately i don't want to do for another 2 weeks). if i can then get her on lots of solids, then i'll consider some form of sleep training (cc???) btw - what is coi which jj talks about.

if tonight is still no sleep central for me, i'm going to trynto remain calm (yeah, right), beg an nct friend to take her and get some sleep. dh told me that next week he is out at ungodly times on mon, tues, wed and thurs. oh, great. i know he is worried i am slipping towards depressiuon (been there before), but i know this is sleep deprivation, rather than what i've had in the past. it is shit. unconditionally and unbelievably shit, though.

Oh no wg that is shit. what is wrong with all our babies, hey? E is also waking more at night, twice a night usually rather than once. Fortunately he is going back to sleep easily so it's not so bad, but I am still tired.

Oh and I asked at HV about him waking up more and they said that is just a "developmental stage" and that he may be needing more milk but doesn't mean he needs solids. Which I think is what we all know logically but it doesn't help when you don't know how long the stage is going to last!!

Can you go to bed when she goes to bed? Eg at 8? Or is she being a pain in the evenings too? That is what i do when it gets really bad. Sorry if you're already doing that! Or get DH to help out a little like effie suggests.

I think jj may have been saying CIO which is Crying it out? i.e just leaving them to cry basically. I have no idea how I know that so I may have made it up!

whoever was asking about supermarket shopping, we shop at sainsbury's as it is the nearest, don't do online shopping, I tried it and didn't like it really. Not sure how much we spend a week, as some weeks we eat loads from freezer, some weeks we eat out a lot, etc, but I would guess about 70 quid, including my lunch but not DH's and quite a bit of booze, some but not all meat and fish.

Hello Nolda, my Eddie says hello to your Eddie!

trace thanks for python warning.

Oh and just to add I know jj was not recommending CIO!! I believe it's the sort of old school recommendation where you just leave them to cry. CC is meant to be a bit more structured where you go in and reassure them every so often but still leave them to cry a bit. I don't know much about it though.

I spent ages today making a Thai curry from scratch with all sorts of weird ingredients from the local chinese and indian supermarkets. And it doesn't taste any better than the one I make in about 20 mins from the ready made pastes!

DS2 has been waking ever since we started weaning. It was at 3 last night, I'm a bit fed up with it all now.

Our rabbit is here. She is just gorgeous!!! Will have to take some pictures soon.

Hello lovely ladies

I am still lurking but can never normally think of anything appropriate to say, particularly when others of you are so much more eloquent than I can be.

From what I can remember:

Verso - well done on the interviews thus far and fingers crossed....

Veggie I have often relied on your words of wisdom and have absolutely no doubt that you are an excellent mother!

Spot please can we sort out a zoo trip sometime soon? I will FB you - also if anyone else fancies it let me know!

On weaning, I only started this week and DD will be 6 months on Monday. So far I have tried baby porridge, avocado, a bit of yoghurt and carrot. Avocado seems to be winning so far.

Someone was asking what people do in the day (WG?). I try and go out and meet someone/go to a baby group every day. I have to do this because if I don't I get grumpy without at least some adult interaction. Also DD loves looking at the other babies. It helps that there is a lot of surestart stuff going on here (Southwark) so there is always somewhere within a shortish walk to go and best of all it doesn't involve spending money! I'm a bit worried about what I'm going to do once they all stop for the summer though....

I went to a sleep clinic today (was referred by the HV) and apparently CC is the magical answer to all our problems! I am feeding DD to sleep unless she is in the pushchair or the sling but to be honest I don't really consider it to be much of a problem at the moment. The HV was insistent that it's a bad habit (she likened it to smoking) that needs to be broken as soon as possible. In an ideal world DD would go to bed at 7.30 pm (rather than 10 pm as now!) and settle herself to sleep but since her sleeping is so much better than it was I'm reluctant to complain about it or to try and change things and am not sure whether I can do CC anyway!

Phew, that was a bit of an epic from me, sorry - will try to pop on a bit more in future....

Sorry to those being kept awake all night - little L has not been great this week( two hourly last night and snacking on and off all day so not sure when he will want next feed). It's funny really as last week I was starting to think he had turned a corner and he had some long stretches of sleep.
I was so tired this morning that I kept us in all day which is probably the wrong thing to do but I couldn't even face getting a bath (I've just had one now - v speedy affair with DS being kept amused by his mobile!)

He's doing quite well with feeding himself though and he had an enormous poo today which had bits of red pepper and other food stuffs in it!

Supermarket shopping - tesco online. We spend about £60-70 per week although DH often picks up extra booze on top of that. Am planning to try out the other online ones to see if any better/cheaper!

Veggie - we had similar with DH's work. A few months ago they enforced a 10% pay cut in the American branch and asked the people here to do the same (apparently it can't be enforced over here). DH wasn't going to but did in the end as he was worried it may affect his career in the long term! The problem was we had budgeted with me not being at work so this has made things tighter. It's also annoying as DH really puts his all into his job and does lots of unpaid overtime/goes in at weekends etc. Since the paycut he has made more of an effort to be home on time as starting to feel slightly undervalued at work - but DS and I appreciate seeing more of him!

Can't remember what else I had to say and DH just got home. I enjoyed the fim Stardust too
and am ordering the twilight books!
I'm also planning to search mumsnet for threads on self settling as DS will have none of it. If I put him down he slowly starts getting more and more upset til he is screaming. Don't feel I can leave him to cry at the moment. I can rock him to sleep quite well but I often have to let him sleep on me during the day as he seems to wake straight away when placed in cot.

Hi thanks for the shopping input - I am going to try Ocado tonight as I hate that substitution thing and I've only done online shopping for food once (clothes and everything else I'm a total online shopping whore) I'm so torn between can't be assed to go to the supermarket, and wanting the freshest stuff from the very back of the shelf which I know they don't deliver you!
Will let you know how it goes...

Pingu great to hear from you again! I'm not sure i'll do the zoo, but if you meet for a coffee / lunch before i'll come along!

DS started this waking thing around the time we went away overseas which is understandable, however he didn't go back to sleeping through after being home a while, but having said that, we did start weaning a couple of days after we got back! He has only slept through one 3 nights out of about 3 weeks we've been back, and I feel like I've tried everything. I have noticed though (the same thing as some have said) that his appetite during the daytime has changed and he had one less bottle today and then I couldn't keep him awake after 6pm!! he has one less becuase the usual bottle at the usual times were strung out through the day. I think I have to make a conscious effort to ensure he doesn't snack and go back to doing the strict 4 hourly feeds. I became a litte slack routine wise during and after the trip away, and it is when all the sleep problems started.

Ok I'm waffling on now, must get on with this online grocery order!

Oh and I test drove the P&T today Everyone had said it was heavy but I didn't think it was that bad at all? Plus I have the carseat which is compatable with it which is a bonus - I had decided Arti you had solid advice to stick with the buggy I have until I need the double, (as dh said also)but my friend pointed out that when DS was born it was so cold and I have only ever used the buggy with the foot muff etc so the actual bugggy is in mint - as new condition which I would get a good price for. I'm going to give it more though and I'm sure I'll procrastinate enough that that will be the case anyway. but we'll see!

Kayz yay for your friend! and is it you TTC before the years end possibly too? it will be really funny to hear when someone on pour thread is PG again!

"our" thread - not "pour"

Hello everyone,

How awful all these waking babies and sleep deprived mums. WG It must be hard for you (and others like arti) who don't have a mum to call on. I wish I could do something practical to help. As it is, just remember that we're all here for a moan and even in the middle of the night it is likely one of us is awake. I find that very reasurring somehow.

trace Re L's birthmark, I think you are certainly saying the right things to her, which should help her feel positive towards it and not self conscious. Did your GP say whether it would be painful to have it removed?

verso Well done on the interview. 4 rounds of interviews, wow!

arti We are signed up for Lovefilm too. One of my favourite films ever is Pillow Talk with Doris Day and Rock Hudson . It is very funny and lighthearted. Rock Hudson is very easy on the eye!

zoe Poor you, that sounds just dreadful. One thought I had is whether you could reinstate the pram bit (the word escapes me but the lying down rather than sitting up bit) until DD gets the hang of daytime sleep again. You could use it just for when you desperately want her to sleep - take her on a walk or just push round the kitchen. I always find that when I have a magazine and a coffee ready DD wakes up. It is just extra infuriating.

NJAM LOL at your busy household! How do you feel about your DH being a SAHD? I think DH would enjoy the fun bits but leave the house in a tip each day!

Well DD has eaten . She seems to have taken to the idea of BLW as she guzzled banana and has had a bit of melon. Having so many teeth (six of them now ) she does bite off large chunks which is a bit worrying, but she spits those out. I watch her like a hawk though which must be very off putting for her. Anyway best go, DH wants to watch a film. Night all.

Hello Pingu! I reckon your HV was talking bollocks, many advocates of CC (and I did it with DS when he was 15 mo) say it isn;t a good plan under a year. And there are other things you can try. There's Pick Up Put Down which is the baby whisperer one, also there's the No Cry Sleep Solution idea of taking them off the boob just as they're falling asleep to lessen the association with feeding to sleep. Why is it such an awful habit to have for the baby? A pain for the mum, yes...

Having said all that am listening to DS2 grumbling on the monitor, he isn't hungry as he's just been fed and he's tired but does not want to sleep in his cot. Am standing firm (for a few minutes anyway then I;ll give him a cuddle)

it's amazing how sleep deprivation can warp your brain... i was so delerious last night that i even mentioned to dh that mil should come and stay next week to help me out when he's out mon-thurs. don't worry, i soon came to my senses (to be fair dh also thought i was insane for even suggesting it).

do you know, she has rung up twice since dh's recording on sunday and on neither occasion has she asked how it went or indeed, even mentioned it. it is all tuppence this, tuppence that, tuppence blah blah blah. don't get me wrong, i do love my little madam, but i find my mil's sentimentalising of her granddaughter at hte expense of her own son utterly infuriating and hurtful. i wish i could call her and remind her to ask about her son's achievements, but i suppose it isn't up to me.

makes me appreciate my dad and his ladyfriend more and more. everytime i get back from my pil's, i call dad and tell him to keep taking the vitamins - please don't leave me all alone with them as my only remaining family.

Oh WG, I wish I could come stay with you. I wouldn't be much good but would make you lots of coffee.

I've been lurking today but never got around to posting, now I can't remember everything. I will try to respond to what I remember but if I miss anyone sorry. Oh hang on just gotta get some chocolate.

Right Daisy, when baby does suck on the boob it reduces the supply, whether it's due to expressing or introducing formula. You seem quite happy to let your supply gradually decrease so I would just keep doing what your doing and let nature take it's course, rather than just going cold turkey. Though other with more experience of weaning onto FF might have better advice. By the way 6months, well done. I know your stopping at 2 are you a little sad that's the BF is ending now?

Trace, could you talk to her teacher about the best way to deal with it? Though you sound like you are doing ok yourself.

Already I have almost eaten all my block of G&B butterscotch.

PMK I'm not sure what she buys but I think she gets a lot of the waitrose own brand range which is good value. I love their fruit & veg as they are decent sizes and often from the UK. We get DS1's meat from local farm shops but our weekly shop is about £100 but that is all we get we don't do any top up shops anymore (I get loads of milk from ocado & put it in the freezer) and as DH works from home a lot it feeds all of us fulltime, DS has no meals at nursery. Dh & I also get a few treats to stop us going out to cafes too much during the day.

Pingu, your HV is a bit of a wally. I really find this whole babies forming habits thing totally bizarre, the only habit DS1 has ever formed is telling his mummy he loves her quite often, which is nice.

We had a chilled day today. DS1 was tired after nursery so we had a picnic lunch in the garden then just hung around a bit, watched some music on demand videos. DS1 is quite into U2 at moment. Amazingly DS2 had a 1.5 hour sleep at 4pm this afternoon so went to bed a little later. DH rang and told DS1 his bedtime story which was cute, I put the phone on speaker for him and DS2 heard his voice and got really excited, I'm sure he recognized his dads voice. Will be nice to have DH back tomorrow.

Effie I love your FB photos so cute.

Right I can't remember anymore and my chocolate is gone.

Sorry that should have read when baby does not suck on the boob. Sorry bit confusing.

Also NJAN nice that you DH wants to be a SAHD, I have always suspected that DH would be a much better SAHP than me, but then he also earns money better than I do too so will stick with the current arrangement.

Spoke to DH tonight he has decided not to agree to the 12 day voluntary pay cut thing, he and some other guys on his team have worked out that if they try to renegotiate contracts which is what they have said they will do with employees who don't agree they will refuse and then they will be forced to offer redundancy with a nice little tax free package and DH is constantly being called by other companies and agencies looking to offer him work so he figures he can afford to be disloyal. He is lucky, but the sad thing is many people who work fir this company have very specific skills that only this company needs, so they have no option but to agree to the pay cut. The most annoying thing is that the company isn't making up for loses it has just cone under it's projected profits so is trying to make up the short fall. Working for the NHS was annoying, stressful and at times probably quite bad for my health but I would take it over a big company any day.

Veggie: good for your DH. If nothing else, being mucked about by your employers is more than a bit depressing.

NJAN: DH looked after DS1 when I went back to work for the first few months, then did a day a week. Would love for him to be able to do the same this time round but may not be possible. I found it really good and DS1 got a lot of balance from doing things Daddy's way. It's taken a lot bit of adjustment to go back to the SAHM WOHD roles.