June 2008: the One Show (almost)

[Essie3]

Amber- abdn concerned about DH going offshore again. And was not remotely implying you are pushy parent- was more comment related to silly NCT mum who made me so upset the other week. Her son the same age as mine and is walking, woofing and doing all sorts of other things.

Abdn ((((hugs)))) (all I can do for you.)

BDQ- I don't think that you would lose anything by trying cutting back that feed for a few days and seeing how it goes. You could always have extra milk ready first and last thing. If dropping the afternoon feed doesn't make a difference, you could go back until you feel happy to try again. Perhaps substitute with a drink of fruit juice and chocolate biscuit for the calories (I confess when Cecily was ill with tonsillitis, I took to getting her a double chocolate flake frappe thing from Cafe Nero to boost her calory intake)

woofing puree ? Doesn't the silly NCT mum know that your LO reads Private Eye, and mine rants about the BNP on FB?

I think you're right that I just need to give it a try. I'm surprised how anxious I am about it - I weaned him off all the other feeds and dropped night feeds/dream feeds without so much of a blink of an eye. I guess I'm still freaked out by the centile drop (no matter how many times I tell myself it doesn't matter).

Right I need to go and finish invites for DS's 1st birthday party and watch some tv for a bit. What are people watching now everything good has finished?!?! No big brother round at my house.

Neenz and other LazyMummies: One of my NCT friends told me she had been worrying about not doing enough structured play and letting her DD amuse herself too much of the time. Then she found some parenting stuff on the internet that advocates as much free play as possible. Apparently it is better for babies to explore in their own way and own pace rather than having Mummy telling them what to do with a specific toy. This is what I remind myself of as I surf the net from my sofa

Oh, and Essie - armpit hair is coming on a treat, thanks!

When does one become an "extended breastfeeder" BTW? I kind of assume it would be at about a year old. They are more and more like toddlers these days.

Just seen the photo that Sponge posted on FB. The babies look gorgeous, but the top I am wearing is letting me down somewhat . At least it was the one black bra I have though instead of a grey catastrophe.

Morning

Abdn - how are you this morning?

Puree - does he wag his tail too?

Morning Deb, and no, he doesn't (wouldn't I love it if he did!)

BDQ- centiles are just designed to freak you out. Don't let them win! Enjoy the invitation-writing- is S writing in joined-up letters yet?!. (PS- we have just bought the box set of The Wire and Dexter to watch as anti-BB here too)

LMAO at Essie and Ali cultivating their underarm hair. Next you'll be knitting your own yogurt!

[whispers....Cecily walked four steps yesterday!! She was sitting on the potty (it's more like a stool if you'll excuse the expression- we are NOT potty training) and playing the current favourite game of stand-up-sit-down when she just took four tiny steps towards me!! Didn't want to steal Sponge's thunder yesterday, but I was so chuffed.]

Good morning all!

Deb, would love to come and visit - was speaing to Ali about it yesterday and am v about her impending holiday with you. I just can't travel abroad when pg - far too paranoid .

On the subject of parenting, does anyone remember this article that someone posted on here last year? Benign neglect and childcare - my mantra . Yes, children need interaction, but they also need to spend time on their own and learn to entertain themselves - something kids are generally v bad at nowadays. I'm sure one of the more experienced mums on here supported leaving our PFBs alone sometimes (I obiouvsly don't mean unsupervised!!) and how much less time they'd get with us once No 1, 2, etc came along! I, for one, am v pleased that Alex knows how to entertain himself!!

And Neenz, do you not remember me telling you how my twin brothers hit their milestones much later than my sister and I? They didn't really start talking until they were well over two - well, you've seen one of them on the telly, no problems with talking now !

Some parents are so competitive it's hilarious (P&P, the woofing?! WTF?!) - go and have a look at the G&T threads on here if you want a laugh! It usually comes back and bites them in the end though .

And yay for Cecily - I wouldn't have minded you posting yesterday you daft thing!! Oh, and let me know what The Wire is like - have heard very good things so may order it on LoveFilm.

Essie, everyone seemed to miss my old name so I changed back! Seriously though, I still use my other name on other parts of MN as I want to start posting on the bf boards soon and, having had a couple of rucks with other delightful posters on there I wanted to go under a different name in the hope of getting better advice!

thanks for all the support, I know I'm being overly emotional about it since DH is a rotating machinery engineer, the part that failed last time was a rotating machinery part, he's read the reports, and he thinks it's safe. Amber nothing's happened, my DH is just heading back offshore today for the first time since the crashes and I'm feeling very fragile and scared. I know I'm being OTT about the whole thing . His flight is at half 9 in Norway so if the news reports are good at lunch time then I'll relax until his flight home.

puree good job cecily!

neenz the twins on the corner from us are 18 months and still not walking. Their mum has an older boy and she thinks a lot of it is because they're twins and they're so happy together. They are obviously light years ahead of Fraser in so many ways though - they talk to each other in their own language and play very complicated games with each other. Walking is just a small part of development, it's just that it's one of the more obvious parts.

BDQ dear zoo is a favourite here too! We go to the library and the boys take books out every fortnight. It's a nice cheap way to find the books they actually like (we tend to buy the ones they love so it's perhaps not so cheap...) No idea about the afternoon milk though, but I have had to learn to ignore the centiles (I am refusing to get my boys weighed) and just go with what I feel is right for them.

essie and ali guess I should be growing my underarm hair too . I don't like the idea of being an extended breastfeeder, it makes me feel like I'm feeding my three year old rather than my wee boy who just learned to clap two weeks ago.

I am hugely in favour of free play here too. If they are happy on their own, I would never interfere and try to play with them. I miss my mornings at home just for that reason - I'd often get to read a book on the sofa while the boys played - but in the afternoons they're more tired and need more input from me.

The Wire is great, though takes a while to get into- has lots of threads that slowly knit together. A friend recommended needing the subtitler sometimes to understand the slang. We're onto series two so I could lend you one if you like (we bought the whole box set for £40 on Amazon)

Glad the Sponge is back. LMAO at needing anonymity from your oline persona!

@ P&P!

What can I say, I'm an argumentative old cow who never knows when to back down!!

Oh, and btw, I was a very early talker - so let that be a warning to all of you with your clever talking babies!

Yes please to The Wire x

Morning everyone,
Yep that free play thing is what I am doing here as well while I nap on the sofa/surf the internet!

I am so shattered at the moment, woke up feeling like someone had superglued my eyes together, fell asleep during my breakfast and then had to go for a half and hour lie down after breakfast, this was all before 8am!

BDQ - no major tips from me on the chicken nuggets, I never have much luck with reheating that sort of thing, stews etc seem Ok but I guess that is because of all the liquid.
Yes that does sound like the same book bag we got, tried J out with a lift the flap book and he was very well behaved with it (surprised me!)

Right I should be getting ready, we are off to the docs this morning, got an appointment for J as well, realised that he hasn't seen a doctor since he was about 3 months! Nothing much wrong with him but he does pull at/itch his ears quite a lot so going to get them looked at.

p&p Good luck with the clomid - you may get twins! Hope it doesn't make you feel to grotty.

I know quite a few people who have breastfed two year olds so it feel normal to me. I fed DD2 until she was 2 1/2, two of my friends were bf'ing children of the same age and it felt alright to us as we were all still doing it. Within a week of me stopping the others did too!

All of mine have been early walkers but I put it down to neglect.... If they want to get somewhere they have to move themselves there! There is nothing you can do to make a baby do something at this age, they will do it all when they are ready.

Oh, you have all made me feel much better about being a LazyMummy . It always felt right to leave them to entertain themselves but a little voice in my head was saying 'you only think that cos it leaves you free to watch TV and go on MN' Glad to hear I am doing best for them after all .

Ktpie, hope you feel better soon! Early PG is horrendous isn't it. My little sis is PG again (had a mc in January) and she is feeling terribly ill. She has had some spotting but doesn't seem too concerned (she is about 6/7wks pg now) - she doesn't use MN, I think that can be a good thing sometimes. She is just going with the flow.

Well day two of cow's milk has gone OK, E drank quite a lot at breakfast, but T still not so much. So I took the lid off his cup and he drank quite a bit with me holding it to his mouth, then he tried to do it himself and threw it all over the florr. Oh well, it was a good excuse to get the mop out - the floor really needed it. I bought a new mop head about a month ago and it had still never been used - so I mustn't have mopped the kitchen floor for about a month . So I am going to by T one of those cups without a lid but the non-spill type - are they sippy cups? Like the one Puree linked to.

going I think you might have hit the nail on the head - you had friends still BFing in RL - I'm once again the only one I know still feeding. I did feed DS1 to 17 months though and only quit because my milk changed so I'm not eager to quit yet, nor am I eager to continue IYSWIM. We'll just try to take what comes and let Fraser guide us. (He's already fine with skipping the afternoon feed if we're out and about, we tend to just forget).

I am not growing armpit hair though... phew! feel better after drawing that line in the sand...

I think extended BFing is over 1 year, but as mine are only 13mths and I am stopping now I don't think I qualify

You know, I felt funny about stopping but actually it has been great . Like this morning, instead of BFing E, I read her a story, for pretty much the first time ever. By the end of the book she was turning the pages by herself [proud]. So I am looking forward to stopping BFing at bedtime too, so I can sit them on my knee with a beaker and read them a story .

On early waking, E has been waking at 6am recently, and yesterday I thought it was cos her door was slightly ajar and she could see that it was light outside (from the sun coming into the landing from the bathroom). So last night I shut all the doors on the landing so it stayed dark and she stayed in her cot till 7.45 this morning. She was awake but just played, I think she still thought it was nighttime. So maybe something to try for early wakers? Make sure there is no sunlight getting into the room, even from the door!

Going, my SIL is still BFing at 1yr (tho her LO is allergic to cow's milk so she kind of has to) and my sis BF'd till 14mths and it definitely makes a difference to what feels 'normal'. I have had no qualms about carrying on to this stage and only had a few comments, which didn't bother me. It's funny though that you all gave up at the same time - do you think some were thinking 'I can't give up yet cos Going hasn't given up yet'?

Ali, I never even noticed your top on the photo! It's funny how we see pics of ourselves very differently to how others see them. You look fab and Peter is just gorgeous!

Right I am stepping away from the computer, that's the fourth (or is it fifth?) post in the last 30 mins

Neenz I think it was more a case of it feeling normal as we were all doing it, we all realsied it was time to stop and one stoppping just gave the others courage to do the same. I just got sick of it as she was a constant feeder, it was really easy to stop - just told her the milk ran out and she was fine with it!

OK, I'm doing it again - should be preparing for a big presentation I'm giving in a couple of hours, but I'll prepare in a minute...a lot happened on here since my last post. But I did go to bed at 9.45!

Armpit hair, well, Abdn, I'm able to use it to draw lines and waves in sand now... My comment was only because someone thought I was all hippy and I realised I can't really casually mention bfing now to most people in RL as they react weirdly! (Ali I thought your top on fb was ok, and no armpit hair peeking out so clearly a bonus! You look fine! And Peter is so cute - where did all that hair come from? Haven't seen either of you in a while I suppose.)

BDQ can't really give any qualified advice on the afternoon milk. But I can on centiles: Iestyn is in the minus numbers, and I gave up worrying. I get him weighed because I want to know when he's ready for a forward facing car seat. LOL, I think he's too big for my pocket now! But anyway, as I've said before - Iestyn will not drink milk during the day from anything, and it's having no ill effects on him. How about you make sure that his afternoon snack is something like weetabix (so he gets the milk) or oatibix to please neenz? That's what I did, but now I'm past caring, you know, the whole careless attitude to parenting.

Just a quick question though. On a safety subject. Iestyn's favourite place to play is at the window - I have a low window on my landing, 6 inches from the floor (I live in a barn) with a step in front of it. He happily bangs the window and stands up leaning on it. I've put a lock on it, obviously! But double glazing - is it safe? Could he break it? It's wooden framed double glazing.

Right got to go to prepare this presentation.

Random question. And stupid too.
Iestyn is having his first haircut tomorrow. I want to save his golden locks - but how do I do that? Is there some secret parent skill which wasn't handed over to me with my newborn?

Don't know about saving hair Essie (I am not one for sentiment in that way!). Can't you just put it in a plastic sandwich bag or something?

I am sure Iestyn wouldn't be able to break the window but I would stop him from doing that cos what if he goes round to someone else's house and does that and the window isn't locked or isn't double glazed? I'd play safe.

So I put the twins down for their lunch nap without and BF. T didn't notice but we had about five minutes of crying screaming from E, but she dropped off eventually and is still asleep over an hour later so that's all good!

The young girl, Anna, who is going to be looking after the twins when I first go back to work came round today to see them, and they loved her. Even though T has been quite clingy recently (wouldn't go to MIL the other day) he went to her no problem. She is a lovely girl and after today I feel much happier about having her look after them. I had a bit of a panic at first thinking 'can she cope with two toddlers' but I think she will be just fine. She is just doing 3 weeks then we go on hols for two weeks then they are going to the CM.

I have been getting into Twitter today - anyone on it?

Going, I love that... 'the milk ran out'. Brilliant!

LOL neenz, I thought I was unsentimental - 'sandwich bag'!!
Hm, hard to know what to do about the window - they also have one at nursery which is where he got the idea from!! He likes to look at the sheep and cows at ours, and he's happy there so I get to drink tea in bed...
neenz on a personal note, are you watching your boobs? It's a gradual cut down, right? I had to be very careful.

Aw, that's sweet Essie - watching the cows! What are you going to do with the hair then? Did you not like the sandwich bag idea? I meant then put it in his memory box or soemthing

My boobs are feeling a little fuller than usual, but not really engorged. They didn't tend to have that much at lunch anyway. I am going to BF them before bed so that will 'relieve' me, and by tomorrow my boobs should be used to just one feed a day. Then next week I will cut that feed out too . I am actually feeling quite good about it - I didn't realise BFing took up so much of my time. Only about an hour a day I suppose but that's still an hour that I can now spend on the computer doing something else .