Fab Feb 2009: attack of the zombie mums

[dinkystinky]

So here we all are, complete with babies and gro-bags under our eyes

sms Dd sucks her hand when tired and windy too.....could just be sucky?? i don't give water to dd....

Thanx Dinky Luke is an average size baby so not overly concerned like I was with ds1, he was bigger so needed that bit more milk. Ds1 was and still is on the 98th line but at one point came right off the chart and I had to actively cut his feeds which was awful. I'm sure Luke's doing fine, he was born on the 50th line and has remained there, think the mw from last week when she told me how I should and shouldn't feed him has left me a bit unsure.

herb x-post. That's what I think, just windy and when not, is comforted by sucking, but dp wouldn't leave off about it, and Luke wouldn't stop screaming, but think that was more that dp kept flinging him around, rubbing him and winding him when I'd already told him that burp wasn't ready to come out yet, so I got a bottle and Luke took 3oz 2 hours after he'd had about 4oz and wasn't sick or anything and fell straight to sleep, which made me think maybe he was and is getting hungry quicker, not 2 hourly though, that's what happened with ds1 and I fed him, which is apparently what made his colic worse, according to hv, and I've always wondered if that had anything to do with the reflux as he showed igns of that after I'd started feeding him more often so thought maybe an overload of milk stopped his stomach valve working.
Do I worry too much??????
Ok about the water. Have never known whether we should give it or not because the milk is food, but is still liquid, but then so i soup and I would have soup all day without a drink, but then will giving water interfere with how much milk he takes? I was giving water to ds1 before every feed to try to get him to not take so much, plus he was a summer baby and it was quite hot. Think I might leave it for now and start the water in a month or 2. Thank you

catstar big hugs, I am so glad you have all clear for menengitis, must have been so worrying.

I was just about to ask for sympathy for my Isobella as she has an infection, ermmmm on her fingertip! Puts things into perspective. I went into overprotective mum mode and took her into drop in centre and sent hubby 20mins drive there and back to after hours chemist!

SMS - mmm not sure about the hungrier baby thing. I know that DS went through a period when he was wanting his milk earlier and earlier (and was already taking a lot) but it was a few months in - I started giving him the hungry baby milk for his mid-morning feed and the problem was solved but I know with DD (and she's done it several times a day) that sucking after feeding is wind for her.

DD will take 4oz max at each feed 3/4 hourly and sometimes I've offered her more when she's whingeing and sucking even after a full feed. She has occasionally taken it but usually chucked most of it up - I think she wanted to suck but didn't need the food - it can sometimes be an issue can't it with ff babies as they don't get the sucking time that b/f babies get.

I was typing one handed with DD on lap earlier but with the water thing, I only started giving it a) when DS woke in the night when he didn't really want a feed and I wanted him to go back to sleep but that was a few months in and b) once we started weaning (but even then refused it often)....As far as I understand it (but I'm not great on what's what tbh) they don't need it at this stage as the milk is enough. Happy to be proved wrong though !...

DD has whinged her way through the day today. Don't know what was up (might be her cold which is still bothering her as she's still snorting and snotting) but at least she also had three nice long sleeps so the jiggling up and down whilst she howled in between that and feeding was fairly limited. She is now tucked up in bed quiet as a mouse and phew !!....We went over to my Mums house for lunch and she cooked us yummy roast beef whilst DD napped. Mum then looked after the kids whilst DH and I wandered down to the lovely town she lives near and DH bought me a pair of chocolate brown Emu boots (like Uggs). First time we've had an hour on our own since DD was born. I think it was his way of saying sorry for this morning....

I'm being brave and taking DD to London tomorrow for lunch with a friend....hopefully she'll have cheered up by then !

Have a lovely time Herbgarden. Hopefully your DD has got it out of her system today and will be good as good tomorrow.

Talking of London and meet ups Nkweto - I'm up for meeting up. Anyone else? Pretty flexible as to where...

Cheers herb . Personally I'm not even thinking about hungry baby formula, thought about it for ds but hv told me it'd make colic worse. As for water, I know bf babies don't need anything else bar breast milk but think it may be different for ff, don't really know why......but think I'll leave it for now, it's not hot weather and while he's feeding every 3ish hours, if I gave water too, /i'd never do anything else but sit here with him and a bottle!
Have a great day tomorrow (or today really).
dinky I'd be up for meeting but not sure how to get a train into London with a tandem pushchair in regards to stairs. When preg and going to London, I used to get the bus but it takes about 2 hours and I'm not brave enough for that yet!

morning all
catstar hope all ok with Sam, thinking of you

SMS/LBB I can understand your thoughts about getting a part time job. I'm thinking along the same lines but only for my sanity. Problem is jobs here are very limited

herb your mum sounds fabulous, cooking you dinner and looking after kids

I'd sort of hoped DH would help out a bit with the cooking but he is completely useless and refuses to learn. Am really pissed with DS who is usually quite helpful. I was boiling some eggs last night for his and DH's egg mayonaise sandwiches and had to take DS upstairs for bath. Asked DS to let the eggs boil for another minute then turn off. You'd have thought that at nearly 16 with a few GCSE's behind him he'd have the common sense to do it. durrrr.
About an hour later DH opened our bedroom door to go downstairs and the whole house was filled with an evil smell. We rushed downstairs and the pan had boiled dry, the sodding eggs had exploded all over the kitchen and the pan had melted to the hob. During this, DS was sitting in his room which is downstairs next to the kitchen with both his door and the kitchen door open. How could he NOT have heard/smelt it? twat!
this morning the house still stinks, it is disgusting and makes me feel sick so will have to take DD and DS out for a long walk later.

morning. MOS the lingering smell of exploded egg and melted pan doesn't sound like a very nice start to the day, hope your walk later helps.

Bad night last night - poor Harry seems to be having real trouble passing wind and pooing, he cries and strains for ages beforehand. We also had a random mammoth 2 hour feeding session from 4 til 6 - I think feeding helps his pains. He is also developing an aversion to sleeping in his crib, maybe its the lying flat thing, Dinky you're right, he likes sleeping in his bouncer, but I don't reckon I can put him in that all night, even for the sake of a few nice long stretches of sleep.....

And finally (and embarrassingly) I am still bleeding, 5 weeks after my CS and it's started to smell and my scar is red and itchy, so I have to go to the doctors.

And so starts another day

Mos that sounds revolting!

Another bad night here too. Tarran similarly afflicted in the wind department.Plus fed hourly...Lots of babies don't like sleeping flat but i agree a bouncer may not be best fr night time though our downstairs bouncy chair recllines all the way back and is quite flat but our upstairs one is much more "buckety". DS1 had one of these and seemed to like it. Must get around to putting it up for Tarran.

Sorry to hear you wound's a bit yucky Pempe and you're still bleeding. I thought mine was stopping but seems to have started again..

Pempe, sorry to see that Harry is having probs with pooing. My Harrison has become the same, sometimes going two to three days without a pooh. Its horrible isn't it, you feel so helpless. I try rubbing his tummy which seems to help and I'm sure I read somewhere that giving cooled boiled water may help but not sure.
Your itchy scar may be ok. Mine is itchy and I think its because its finally healing. Best to get it checked though. Ref the bleeding, are you doing too much? My bleeding stopped then started again and I worked out I was bleeding a lot more when I was rushing around (how can you not with a baby and a toddler) try to rest a bit (with a nice cup of earl grey and your yummy sounding yogurt) and see if that helps

THOM, sorry you've had a bad night too. Harrison doesn't like lying totally flat so we end up holding him or propping him up most of the time. Must get a bouncing chair

Right, smell has got too much, must round the gruesome twosome up and take them for the promised walk to shops.

Pempe - my bleeding post-CS lasted 6 days, stopped for a day and came back for a further 6 weeks As MOS says it was definately linked to how much I was physically doing.

Sounds like we all have similar stories with DH's - I knew I wouldn't have to post any specific instances and you'd all just 'get me' (that be a face really)

Am royally pissed off at the internet again too. Seems like we are having the same problem just not as often. And it mainly seems to be when I have 5 mins to sit down and log on, no-one else Starting to think it is engineered by DH

DS1 has woken up loads in the night for the past 2 nights which is unlike him. 1st night it was every hour from 11.30 until 4.30 and up at 6 so am shattered. He's usually 7-7. Sam has also decided that he doesn't like to sleep in his crib for more that 1 hour at a time at night - yet happily sleeps on or next to us for 5hours at a time. He's fine during the day but I think he doesn't like the quiet at night. Any tips on getting him in his crib longer as I dont want to have to co-sleep again, really dont like it.

MoS Oh dear. That smell is disgusting isn't it? Hope you get it neutralised soon
Pempe Sorry you've had a rough night. Can you let Harry fall asleep in his bouncy chair and then transfer im to his crib without waking him, just for a week or so so you can get some sleep, once he starts waking up in it, he may start to feel better about it again iyswim.
MoS Is right about the cooled boiled water helping with poo's, think it's even better if you add a tiny bit of sugar. I gave water to ds1 when he had trouble, I never added sugar though. Luke only poo's every other day, but I've also read that not all babies will go every day and that every other day, or every few days or a few times a day can all be normal. Can't remember where I read that so I may be wrong.
Spotty We have a Winnie-The-Pooh night light/show thing. It projects images onto the ceiling and plays a soft tune, it's not very loud but enough for baby to hear, it's sound activated so whenever baby makes a noise, it'll start playing and was enough to keep ds1 happy all night. Other than that, don't know what to suggest. Luke settles better during the day than at night too, PITA isn't it?

The sun is out again. Not sure what to do this morning. I wanted to take them to the park for a burn out seesion so ds1 will sleep for a stretch, but Luke will need feeding at some point between 10 and 11 which means if we are in the park ds1 would have to be strapped back into his pushchair for safety. And if we went after Luke's fed and winded, by the time we got out the door and to the park we might only have 15 minutes before we'd have to come back for ds1's lunch.
Think the only thing to do is street walk this morning for a bit, and park after nap this afternoon, if it doesn't rain like it did yesterday.....what to do?

Oh yes, Catstar Hope Sam is recovering now and they've found out what's wrong. Thinking of you. xxx

Has everyone seen the fb page? DizzyBrummie had a baby girl last tuesday morning weighing 9lbs 13oz.
Congratulations Dizzy

Right, I have tried the play pen idea to keep ds from hitting baby, and all he has done is throw toys in there, which has got to be worse than a close distance tap iyswim. He's been doing it all morning and when he's not trying to throw toys in there he's holding onto the sides and shaking it. When I say no, he shakes his head and says no back but carries on doing it, I've shouted at him and he looks at the floor but carries on when he thinks I'm not looking, I've even tapped his wrist but he hits the air and carries on.......coming to my wits end with this.

Morning

Loads to catch up on....

Catstar....hope all is ok....how scary. Thinking of you all.

I'm with Herb and PT about the 6 week thing....a very difficult time (which I'm just getting to). I feel like I'm on this 4 hourly treadmill that I can't get off or alter and can't imagine another 6 weeks of it. I'm sure that is why babies start to smile at this time because a big smile from your LO just melts you and makes all the sleepness nights worthwhile. I cried the first time DD smiled at me....still waiting for DS though!

Also having fun with DH.....Sat night he got off the sofa at 11pm saying he was knackered and going to bed and I got to bed at 1.30am, only be up again between 4am - 5.30am for feeding and then again at 7am when DD got up.....and he had the gall to say in the afternoon how he had had a bad night and was knackered . I was very pissed off. However, E had a good night last night and I feel a bit more with it today.

SMS - I hardly bothered getting my DD weighed. When she had her jabs, I'd take her in (so 8, 12 and 16 weeks) and that was it. After that, I weighed her myself and filled in the red book. It was obvious her weight gain was fine though and I had no concerns.

MOS - I've hard boiled my eggs like that before........the smell is revolting!
Congratulations Dizzie 9lb 13oz! Good weight!

We also have the Winnie the Pooh nightshow, my DD used to love it and it did help settle her - not at this age though. We have a swinging chair like this for DS which helps keep him a bit more upright and he seems to be very happy in there.

Right, friend and her DS will be here soon, so must get going.....

Pempe morning....sorry if TMI but are you saying you think the smell is the bleeding? I was still bleeding 5 weeks after my CS too although it's only just trailed off but now I think I have my period ...anyway, that's beside the point and I digress.... on the smelling issue, is your wound itching and discharging anything at all ? You might find that the smell is fluid coming out of your scar (that might be what you are saying, sorry if I misunderstood) but I kept thinking that the bleeding didn't smell nice but in fact it was the oozing from the wound which was unpleasant. My anti-b's have sorted it out now though. I have three more to go and my 6 week check tomorrow so we'll see what doc has to say then.

We had a bad night last night. DD still has a cold....it seems to have gone on for a couple of weeks now but she clearly is very blocked up from behind. She woke at 1.45am (earliest from her 10/10/30ish feed for a while) and took a good feed although I'd gone to bed late - typical. She did go down then. She then stireed at 3.45am writhing and farting which sort of wakes her but often doesn't - although she then started to breathe really heavily with it and the blocked nose obviously then upset her and well, it was game over !....I tried a cuddle, the dummy, walking around. Then I did feed her and she took more and went down again by 5.15am after screaming through the snorting for an hour. Every morning when she wakes upshe then snorts and a big bogey comes out - poor little thing I just don't know what to do to make her more comfortable.

MOS I've burned a boiled egg before after forgetting about it and wandering off to do something else and the smell is horrible.....boys eh ?!

Lovely day here although quite cold and windy. Off to pack the car up for my trip to London....I am praying there won't be traffic as DD does that "stop the car and yell and yell" thing. I end up revving the engine at the traffic lights !

Have a good day Herb.

Have you tried the saline drops for DDs nose. I use them for DS just before a feed. It softens up the bogies and then I poke a tissue up his nostrils to get them out. He screams, but it does the trick.

My DS is still choking and puking phlegm....its very distressing (for me mainly) as he can't get his breath, and then pukes everywhere.

Herbgarden it's not the scar that's leaking, that's fine just a bit red and itchy. It could be my period that's come, joined on the end of the normal after-birth lochia thing, and it's that that smells . I've just called my gyno and he said he'll see me on Friday.

Totally with you all on the snotty baby thing - I have been using saline drops in Harry's nose, they help for a while, but then it gets bad again - LMN reckon I might try the rolled up tissue thing.

SMS - I have tried getting him to sleep in his chair/my arms, but he goes rigid and cries as soon as I transfer him to the cot. I've even tried to be tough and leave him for a while to cry and then fall back to asleep but he's having none of it.

herbgarden - I was on exactly the same routine as you last night, weirdly even bearing in mind the time difference. Maybe our babies were sending each other pyschic 'be-a-pain' signals. When Harry wakes up crying before he's 'due' a feed (I'm not on the Gina Ford thing, don't worry...) I try to resist feeding him, but sometimes dancing, jiggling, burping, changing, singing are a waste of time - he just wants more milk it's very confusing.

pempe.. aaron also hates his crib, the only time he spends a few hours in there is if he's asleep in my arms in the evening and i pop him in there as i'm going to bed. he doesn't always stay asleep but if he does i usually get 2/3 hours before he wakes. during the day he usually sleeps very happily in his bouncer.... it reclines back pretty well so i think it's safe enough and he seems to love it.

that said i think he was picking up on me feeling rotten yesterday as he spent the entire day in my arms... cried if anyone lese took him or i put him in his bouncer. we had a good night though, not counting 5am when ds1 was crying due to snot issues and aaron was a bit windy but thankfully they both settled within half an hour.

my boob seems loads better today, still a bit tender and red streaked but no engorged and i'm not feeling fluey today so thankfully the mildest dose of mastitis i've had to deal with.

dp has self diagnosed himself with pneumonia again so is still in bed. last night i did most of the cleaning for him downstairs before bringing the kids up for baths and showers (despite feeling like cow poo myself) not to mention cooked dinner with a cranky baby hanging off me and trying to wade through the mountains of laundry that were piling up.... do you think i got a thanks? nope.... torrents of random abuse because the asshole was cranky coz he can't smoke

anyway... yet again i'm rambling on about myself

catstar.... you'll be surprised at how quick sam gets well when he turns the corner. they kept telling me in scbu that babies get sick very quickly but they also get better overnight and by god it was true with aaron. hope you're getting some rest and dh and little o are coping well enough without you.

mos... yuck! hope you made ds1's life miserable for that astounding feck up. i'd be raging having to live with that smell..... do the crazy saudi shops stock oust and fabreze? not normally a fan of airfreshners but by god they'd be better than burnt egg smell.

pempe, i bleed for 6 weeks after each birth so the bleeding alone isn't out of the ordinary but he smell and wound infection sound dodgy alright, hope you get it sorted.

SMS, when dd was trying to 'give' ds1 toys we used to tell her 'that's lovely dd, how sweet but ds is too little to play with your toys, they're just for you because you're the big girl' not massively effective but i found it helped me as much as her to focus on the good aspect rather than launch straight to giving out. it's so hard with that age gap as they really are too little to grasp what's wrong with 'playing' with the baby but you're in protection mode for the newborn and tend to see red. i found it helped to remind myself that thousands of people have young kids in the house with neborns but i've never heard of serious injury being done to the baby by the toddler (i'm sure it happens but it's not common) so maybe the problem was me getting overly upset about it rather than just dealing with it calmly and trying to (repeatedly) explain what baby likes [kisses and soft cuddles] and doesn't like [chunks of musical plastic landing on his head]

have fun today herbie, i'm sending no traffic vibes your way

ds1 is driving around on his tractor with the kitten in the trailer

Sorry, another post from me

I have a question for people - when I go out shopping in the town where I live, it is far easier to take the baby in a carrier on my front, rather than take the pushchair, because (a) the roads are being dug up to install sewers (nice smell) and look like something from a war zone and (b) shops have narrow aisles here and I don't want to leave my baby unattended outside.

If any of you also do this, how do you carry your shopping? My question is....would it be reeealllly sad to get one of those old lady trolleys? What about when I get heavy stuff like bottles of water? Do I sacrifice my uber-street-cred for the sake of my arms? It's a genuine dilemma...

i use a sling pempe but as i live 5 miles from the shops i don't have to carry shopping home so not much help i'm afraid.

you can get quite fnky granny trollies though i think so i'd be very tempted to do that

Aaaargh - lost internet access for a while there!! Sam is doing well, thanks everyone! We hope to come home tomorrow if blood cultures are ll negative. He's alert, feeding well and lots of wet/dirty nappies. Got a rash all over body but it's 'blanching' which apparently means it's ok. Have got more supplies from home so plan to strt writing out thank you cards this afternoon.

Was just going to try to put down what health visitor advised me about DD's behaviour, but just been told doctors are on rounds so will do that this afternoon. Like the new name "Somemightsay". I'm bored with my name so will do some thinking this afternoon. Have plenty of time for thinking at the moment. Actually, it's nice spending lots of time with Sam - at home he tends to get a bit side lined and kept out of DD's way.

Better go, he's squawking and docs are on way!!!

ciao for now!

so after going to bed not talking to each other due to dp's need to be a fuck head and heap abuse on my because he was in a bad mood he comes down just now and demands to know in a cross voice how much money we have.
'not much as i'm on my way to pay the rent' i reply, 'why, how much do you need?'
.... 'i dunno, i need money to buy you a birthday present so need to know how much is there... and don't sell yourself short as usual, i want to get you something decent' (still in grumpy voice btw!)
so i say 'but i don't need anything expensive, i'd just love for you to buy me something yourself for once... that doesn't mean it has to be expensive, something for a couple of euros would be brilliant as long as you bought it and not me!'
to which he replies 'well i have something in mind, don't know how much it costs but it's probably not cheap. it's something you'd never buy yourself'
feeling the need to change the subject at this point i ask him if he's heading to the docs now (as aparently he has pneumonia again in his expert medical opinion)........... 'no, i'll go tomorrow if it's still not better'

we need an exploding head emoticon