June 2008: Nine months in, nine months out

[Essie3]

Here's to the next nine months!

right getting no joy on my other post -so your thoughts.. do you reckon its going to be completely useless to use out of date ovulation sticks on my digital kit (they're not out packet as never got to use em cos edie arrived.. use by date of december 2008). I can't believe that their efficiency goes that much but i'm reluctant to bin them and spend another £20 if I can help it.

Not sure poppy, Dec 08 isn't long ago, so I bet they would still work but tbh whether it's for contraception or conception, you'd rather be sure the results you were getting were accurate wouldn't you? otherwise you could spend days agonising that you weren't ov-ing when you were, or vice versa

Just read the NCT stuff and think it is a bit short-sighted. Good for you Poppy for taking a stand against this nonsense. I bought into the natural birth thing but afterwards I wondered why I wanted it so badly. It was just very painful and I still needed forceps - I was too tired to push, prob cos I didn't have an epidural!

News here is we have chicken pox (not me, the DTs). Esther has the spots, Theo is just grouchy at the mo, E was closer to the baby they got it off so think she got it first. And did you hear the news about Medised yesterday? They are now saying its for over 6s only!! I spoke to the chemist today and she said the problems are with overdose and allergic reaction. My two aren't allergic and I don't OD them - I usually only give 2.5ml and only use it in dire circs! So the chemist said it was ok. I will only be using it very sparingly from now on then (not that I used it much before).

The reunion was great and we bought a trailer tent. lol at it being big enough for pils. Unfortunatelty they have their own camper so can just turn up any time! We pick the tt up in April and I told FIL we were going to go away the first bank hol in May. He said 'ooh, we could come up on the Saturday and stay til Monday' Nnnnnnoooooo!!!!! Don;t they get it? I do not want to spend my holidays with them!!! I told them last year we would go away with them in Whitsun half-term (my mum, dad and my sisters and their families are coming too so it will be nice family hol), well now they are going to Holland at the end of that week and are pretending they forgot we asked them to come with us. They are going to come for a couple of days but we don't want to go away with them any other time! Grrrr! And then FIL said 'and what about my master plan?' ie going with them to France. I said it will be a while before we go to France camping, I will probably have another baby next year. He said 'well I didn;t think a little thing like that would stop you'. I said ' it just takes too long because you have to stop every couple of hours with a baby, it would take three days to get to France,' then I said 'and anyway we told you we're not going away with you for a summer holiday, we;re going on our own for our summer holiday.' Then he acted all offended saying 'Pappy knows not to intrude!' Well it bloody doesn;t seem like it. Bog off!!!!! Grrrrr! DH said he would have a word so it is not a problem. He will tel them no way! If they can't take a hint we will have to tell them straight. Bloody hell, were they not young once? Did they want to go away with their parents/PILs? I doubt it!

Hi all - I can't keep up!!!!!!

Re epidurals - bollox. I actually thought I would have to chuck myself in the Thames if I didn't get one as I was in so much pain what with Lukes head being mahoosive and the wrong way round. Gas and air just wasn't even touching the sides.

Josey I wasn't crying sad tears - just got emotional. Your daughter has the prettiest eyes I have ever seen on a baby.

Someone wrote something really funny but I've forgotten what it was or who said it but PMSL anyway. erm...

Someone asked how my sis was and she is still preggers it seems and has a scan in a week and a half to check.

All is well here - was looking forward to seeing some Londoners on Saturday but can't come now - boo! Work is fun and Luke is adorable. he uses me as a climbing frame and can actually throw himself over me if I'm on the floor to get to the other side! I have to go into him pretty much every night now as he's standing up and making a grab for the baby monitor. He got hold of it this morning and shouted down the microphone which woke up Mark who had the listening side in the bedroom! Quite funny at 5.30am!!

Hope everyone is doing OK - Essie the councellor is great. You may not think it'll help about work but great for generally having a rant about anything.

Poppy, x-posted there - i think the OV sticks will be OK, they are not really that reliable anyway are they? Is it for conception or contraception? [nosey].

Sorry you're having a tough tim Essie. Hope talking it through helps.

Amber, turn the monitor off!!!

amber lol at luke and the monitor - i'm so impressed with how agile he is .. edie can barely sit up!
neenz for conception..am trying to do a couple of months of using the computer to see what kind of pattern i have - its ridiculous i know given I've got edie but I never did get an idea for when I ovulated in cycle despite loads of tests. given I'm almost certainly going to muck up the computer thingy this month with not knowing how to use it, going away etc I'll waste the rubbish tests on it first. Will keep you all posted on progress but am thinking I will not be that quick to conceive...

and your pils are gems.. (and cannot believe you are thinking of going for the 3 - good for you ).

got worst period pain since edie - do you think there is any pain relief that is equivalent to an epidural if I dose myself with chocolate and red wine?

glad I'm not just militant poppy re the nct thing - may compose an email to them. I knwo the clue is in the name but I dont see the point in being a hero for no good reasson.

and you're right neenz the sticks aren't reliable.. I hate to think of the money I pissed away (literally) on sticks that didn't work...

amberc I'm so pleased work going well.. really makes me feel happy re light at other end of tunnel when I go back (essie massive sympathies to you - I doubt I'd go back if had to go to my old job).

Poppy, if you are just trying to work out your cycle then taking your temp is loads more reliable (although difficult when you are jumping up in the morn to go to a baby). I took my temps and it was great.

You just take your temp before you get up and when it goes up (by 0.2C I think but with a digital monitor you will know when it jumps) you have ovulated. Much cheaper than sticks too, just buy a digital thermometer like this#

There are loads of websites too where you can plot your temp and they tell you when you OV'd. I will try to remember which one I used.

It was this one

thanks neenz I had one of those (in fact two) and couldnt get on with it - it wouldn't register, work etc etc hence why I'd rather eat teh expense. I also had about 5 blood tests to try and work out when I ovulated -all of which were a waste of time...

systemsaddict I was the same when DS1 was born, my DH had to hold him and I'm mad that I wasn't able to get the pain relief I needed (begged for an epidural for two hours before they would transfer me from the midwife care to the labour ward). I'm so pleased I was more capable after DS2 and did feel safe holding him right away.

neenz my DH loves going away on hols with my parents because of all the extra hands... to give your PILs credit, they might have felt the same when they were young and genuinely think that you'd want them with you!

poppy my DH got very annoyed with the NCT for the same reasons that you did - mad that they are so anti-epidurals and obstetricians. We didn't do the NCT refresher class just for that reason.

I'm also not keen keen on the NCT. Two very good friends of mine were members and both had difficult first births and were made to feel an epidural was wrong by the NCT classes they adtended so they suffered much longer than they needed to.

Poppy I used ov sticks and found them comforting more than helpful as I knew when I ov'd. I also took my temp and even checked my cervix - I was totally obessed!!!

OOOOf! siblings!
DS gave DD1 a panic attack last night. A spider jumped out of DDs dolls house and scared the witts out of her. Later in the bath DS got bits of black thread from where? and told her it was spiders in the bath, she was screaming couldnt breath, had to sit hodling her for ages then do a tour of the house to show there was no spiders.
She slept with me last night and at 4ish woke screaming and hitting herself to get rid of the spiders
DS was just playing and broke down sobbing when he realised what he had done.

Got eyes tested today and needed glasses, might be able to read and post properly when I pick them up!

Epidurals I wish I had fkn time to be given one they should be compulsary lol. I have to say though I recovered much better and felt much better after Oli's birth where I had no pain relief, but it hurt the most and I think when it hurts more, you cant do what you are meant to IYKWIM.

I had to have a smear today and it took so much control not to scream get away from me before she even stood beside the bed lol!

Christ what a FKN great day ive had dodgy eyes and my lady bits scraped.

Got community Pead in the morning cant wait to show off Olis vid.

is it not time to hit the wine after a day like that josey? and poor dd (and poor ds as can't imagine he'd do it to upset her - he was just being a brother).

josey, your poor DD1 and poor DS! Siblings are great aren't they . Is your DH back so you can hit the wine in style? I never drink when C's away as I worry about what would happen if they needed me to drive them to the hospital and I couldn't.

lol Josey at epidurals being compulsory!

What's annoyed me most about FIL is he has forced me to say AGAIN today that we don't want to go on our holidays with them. We told them straight last year but they don;t get the message. Now I think I have annoyed him cos he got all defensive today when I said we didn't want to go to France with them. But he shouldn't have put me in that position. Grr.

Thanks for all the supportive comments, people! Should have posted earlier really. I was going to list all my woes on the work board, but I'm wary really because I don't know what it's like.

Poppy I was also furious about the NCT thing I read in the paper. Hopping mad. I get really annoyed about the stupidity of attitude - want a really, really natural birth? Bet you don't. Really natural means Russian roulette - will you live? Will you die? Will the baby live? If it's all natural, do you stitch up a tear? What about hand washing - how natural is soap and antiseptic (not at all natural). What if the placenta doesn't come out (happened to me) - let me take my chances and succumb to childbed fever? Refuse me the antibiotics which meant that I'm alive now? Natural childbirth was the biggest killer of women until the NHS. Until Victorian times the death rate was something hideous like 1 in 4 women. That's natural. Very annoyed.
And for the record, I had an epidural which didn't slow things up (I had been labouring for over 48 hours previously!) and which didn't lead to any intervention. Just me pushing.

neenz it should definitely be your DH who has to tell his parents! not fair for you to end up in that position.

essie hugs about your job... I completely understand what it's like to love what you do, but not all the circumstances in which you do the work. I had a really tough time back at work after DS1 too. People kept saying it was because I was all hormonal from having a baby, but it wasn't! It was that now that I had other priorities, I was less likely to put up with the crap I'd been swallowing before. I made enough fuss that they took me seriously and I was much happier. I don't know if you have that option, I hope so, but sending hugs regardless!

Can I rant too? I just had the revised paper I submitted sent back to have it's format changed. Bloody two minutes of editing commas (there's varying reference styles between all the journals and it's a miracle if you can get it right the first time) but well over an hour of fighting with the f*&king publication software that never works. Like I have nothing better to do with my time... I bet it took the editor more time to write me the email than it would have taken her to change the files herself.

I'm with you Essie (though maybe not quite so soap-boxy as don't have the academic authority you have ) I'm all for the pain relief. I did NCT and can say I didn't get very much from it, other than meeting people but then I was quite confident about needing an epidural before I got to the class. The teacher did seem quite appalled by my determination but given that I was walking with a stick and takiing drugs for SPD pain I think she had very little room for manouvre. I'd do it all again exactly the same way tomorrow.

Speaking of which Poppy- want to start a ttc thread with me?!!!

Just got the fantastic news that a friend who has had two mc (one mmc only discovered at 12 week scan) has had successful 12 week scan and baby kicking like a loon. Made me smile and cry and hug babypearls like a loon.

Hello! I'm back from London town. Will try and catch up which all the chat. I see I go away for the weekend and you're all protesting against the NCT, half of you seem to be ttc and they've increased the dosage of medised to try and stop neenz getting her hands on some

On the medised stuff - I'm going to try and find the time to read what was actually said rather than what's being reported IYSWIM as I've not found any of the reports particularly clear.

I haven't read the NCT stuff or gone back through the pages to find out what's been said, but we were quite lucky in that my NCT teacher wasn't judgy at all about pain relief etc (although she was clearly pro the natural route). I always saw the birth as something quite functional that needed to be got through and if I needed pain relief then so be it. Don't know about anywhere else, but they dont give out any prizes here for drug free births . Obviously that's very tongue in cheek and I completely respect anyone who does want to do it au natural.

Oh also, bargain alert - I got this table and chairs for S for around £7 quid today instore at tesco's here They do a pink version too. It's still full prince online so maybe just an instore promo.

Poppy Im too tired to have any wine it would knock me out and poor Olivia would prob end up sleeping in a puddle of sick!

PMSL at the pissing away money comment.

Im afraid I didnt do anything like that just Shagged it too me my third turn ttc to discover about EWM and I got a BFP 2weeks after

Neeze yes I do think they should be and this comes from the mouth that has only ever had one after giving birth.

Its like going to some pre tooth extraction group and them saying you must have all your teeth out without any pain relief ok would not be the response because you WOULD know how F*kn sore that would be, the only reason these physcos get away with telling 1st time mums not to have an epidural is because we are so bambi eyed about the whole thing until the first F*ker of a contracting kicks in

Josey had better go before a drugs raid is done on her house for sounding so pro drugs, its only in childbirth I believe.....nope I didnt have that wine

Viva - Thanks, I thought it was eye snot too and my friend was making me feel guilty for not taking him to the Dr for it

SA - pleased to hear about Caitlin feeding

Poppy - casualty count today, 3.5. Stefan, Ethan and Nigel, I'm the .5, I think I'll be a full casualty tomorrow!

Ali - sorry to hear about the sleep, Ethan loves to clap too and will clap in the right place in "If you're happy..." - so sweet, no pointing here yet though, or peekaboo.

Essie - our sheep pen playpen/roomdivider has arrived. It is huge and doesn't fit in the room with all the panels, we had to leave 2 out.

Amber - I asked about your sister, glad it's still all going OK

Epidural, schmepidural. What you want, laydeze, is a uterus like a large plastic bag and a pelvis to match. Then delivering a baby is like blowing a lentil down a drainpipe.

Bit at all the broody talk. These babies are growing up too quickly.

I'm really trying to lose weight and I'm weighing myself in kg so I can see the general trend without being demoralised at how horribly heavy I am. When I think of all the chocolate I have avoided eating in the past two weeks, I am truly disgusted.

Essie sorry you're having a difficult time. Hope the counselling helps.

Neenz hope your DH can sort things out with your in-laws.

oh poor you Deb. Hope you're all feeling better soon.
Thea has eye snot at the moment too. (thanks for the gross phrase, Viva, which has now entered my vocabulary!)