January 2008 Shiny New Year Toddlers - first steps to mischief !!!

[Lilyloo]

Hope that's ok all

LOL Simpson at 'I love anything that keeps him quiet!' I always maintian toys are for parents!
Glad jabs were ok.

Hang on a tic - going to change computers...

LaT - I agree

DD's favourite thing is metal tea spoons ATM Odd child!!

She flings them in the air to hear clatter time and time again, then when she gets bored of that starts chewing on them!!

She has learnt a new word today "no"

If I move her away from anything, she says "no" then creeps back to where she was

Lucky - that looks good. I would prefer an apparment to a hotel any day really. Hope you have a good time. When are you going?

Madmouse - ugh. Sorry you're having a rough time in regard to DH. Has he not told you what happened at that meeting at all? I must confess, I'm more inclined to clam up with a problem, although I am much better than I was. DH is the kind who talks and talks out of nervousness when he's down and it's mad eme realise (with respect to your DH) how selfish it is to clam up. I hope he puts a smile on your face again soon.

Gingeme - gald you are alive! What is Paradise Park? Was it good?

JKS - I hate it when they start winding back the time at which they wake up. It's grim. I currently pick Sabela up when she wakes (at any time between 5.30 and 6.15) and persuade her to sleep on my chest for a while more. I don't sleep, but at least I'm horizontal and in the dark, which is much better than playing with a baby when everyone else is asleep - or an older child I presume.

Angechica - that bike trip sounds exciting! It's nice ot have misspent ones youth, isn't it? And, for me at least, it's also nice to not want to do it now!

Lilyloo- How's it going with DS? Is it going to be a football weekend? I hope not and if it is that it goes smoothly.

Sabela all AGAIN today with a cough. I guess neither of us have immunity to Spanish bugs. She's also teething again, poor love. SHe was having such trouble going to sleep for her nap today that I spoke to her seriously (which she does actually listen to!). When I'd finished she pointed to three places her mouth wa shurting, as if to say, 'Look mu, this is why I can't sleep.' Gone off to sleep easily now though after having eaten precious little today.

Feeling a bit down as we've put mum's house on the market. I saw the estate agent's pictures on the internet yesterday and felt just bleak. I can't decide whether to go back there for one last goodbye if it gets a seller before we're back - which I think it will. On the one hand, I know it will only make me very sad and there'll be a lot of faff as I have to fly with Sabela (DH has said the one thing I can't ask of him is to leave Sabela with him for several days. It was torture for both of them last time. Nice to be missed and needed!) On the other hand, the house was so uniquely hers and it will be my last chance. Most of her things will have gone though. What would you do?

LaT - I would definately go as you might regret it if you don't

See how you feel when a buyer is found and take it from there...

LaT i personally wouldnt go back i dont think. I find it hard to feel close to my mum though in any physical place iyswim even the cemetry. For me a house ould be even more souless without her things there , just an empty shell. And given the difficulties it would create for you to go back. I would be more inclined to maybe get a special plant and plant it on the day the sale goes through or similair. That would be more sentimental for me but it is a very personal decsion.

Simps glad they coped with the jabs.

Lucky ooh looks lovely i went to Salou with my parents as a teenager.

JKS yawwwwn hope you get better night tonight as do i had rubbish night here too. But dd wasnt eating yesterday so think it was hunger and she was freociously trying to bf but we pretty much stopped now so had to come down at 3am and fill a bottle.
Meet up looks good.

MM hope dh opens up to you soon. Must be hard when he cant share things with you.

Still undecided about ds at football. It just seems bit odd given he been at football club all week. He got trophy today for winning penalty shoot out I talked to his other coach on Monday and he said they grow out of getting too emotional not to worry. Its also good that he recognises how he is playing , even if he is dissapointed, he just has to deal with his frustration which will come in time...

We having film night here got 4 dvds from video shop for 50p each on number 2 now. Got blankets and popcorn , pringles and pop! Hope ds and dd1 sleep after sugar overload....
M in bed went to soft play today aaahhh was packed we stayed for lunch then left. Wont be going in half term again!

Gingeme - looks like you had a good day

Simps - well done on getting the jabs done. we love the thomas aquadraw here too
smear test will NOT be as bad as you think, had mine recently, was much better than i remembered from before.
I currently have dentists on my to do list, that'll be a while then!

LaT - yes we try and get T to cuddle up in bed for a bit but he's hyper at that time in the morning. rushes around, speaks faster than he can get words out:
'mummy, look mummy, look, i saw something...'
yesterday was a Christmas tree out the window - street lights i think
today was Diego rescuing someone
Bad luck with the bugs. we all have coughs and colds here, they flare up and down all the time. DH says he hasn't felt well since Christmas.
Re your mums house - I wouldn't go. there's nothing of her left there now. Maybe make up a collage of photos of her & you in the house, or something.

Madmouse - feeling any better today?

Lily - maybe give football another chance then. can you all go and if he kicks off you take him home? (yes i know that wouldn't be fun but maybe worth it in the long run)
The dvd session sounds fab - i look forward to those days when the boy are older
we have chickened out of play places this week, most places in fact!

H cried when i said NO very firmly to him earlier (he was hitting T's head while i was changing T's nappy). he got over it by the time i had finished the nappy change.
He is clearly saying yes, daddy and some others. And he's got a new clicking sound, like imitating a horse? he loves making it!

Oh, and he took his first steps today
(MIL said she saw some at the weekend but i'm not counting them as we weren't here!)
took a couple more after the bath. have to get DH to see some over the weekend.
he's gone off baths, again.

no real plans for the weekend. dh wants to get me a cycle helmet, and T a new one, then H can have T's. We got a trailer off eBay last week so want to all go out together. (Dh has an old fold-up bike that I'll ride as i haven't got a bike, yet.)

What's everyone else doing?

JKS - Sabela cries when I tell her 'no' sometimes too. She's definitely getting more strong willed too, but it does really seem to upset her that she has made me 'cross'. LOL at Diego etc! and to the steps. How exciting.

Lily, JKS and Simpson - thanks for the advice. I really am in two minds. Am a bit that the Estate Agent already has two people interested (no offer yet). In one day! It's all going a bit fast. I don't suppose it would be any nicer if it went slow. Those are nice ideas of ways to mark the occasion.

Lily - can I ask a really sensitive question? I'm sorry if it's out of order, but do you still remember your mum really well? I started writing a diary but I haven't kept it up. I'm now getting scared that soon I'll just start forgetting. I'm also very cautious to do anything that night distort my memories (like getting really upset if I go back to the house).

Congratulations H on the steps

Aqua draw a big hit...even DD worked out how to do some scribbles was looked puzzled when her finger wouldn't make the same mess!!

It's my Grandmother's 90th birthday party tomorrow so going to that. Her sister will be there (the one she found out about 6yrs ago!!)

Have met her & her husband a few times but still a shock to find out you have new family iyswim...

Some of my family coming back to ours afterwards as Ipswich Town on sky. DH will do kids tea etc and watch match in peace

Lilyloo - how are you getting on with films?

Film number 2 just finishing is sad so dd told me and ds crying!
They off to bed then is very late for them will likely pay tom.

Simps have lovely day tom.

Just putting dc to bed then will answer you Lat.

off to bed soon! Am actually working overtime tomorrow. Invigilating at big exam day for doctors.

we had a great day out on the beautiful Northumberland coast yesterday with some of DH's family up from Sussex. Holy Island and Bamburgh.

This week's the week DH was supposed to be helping with sleep training DS. But every night, for the first time in many moons, he has slept til 5-6am Typical. If after 6 we get up with him, if earlier we bring him in with us and he generally will go back to sleep for a hour or more. This has directly coincided with using a clip to attach his dummy to his grobag at night - it's a revelation!!!!!!!

Kitchen coming on Thursday. YAY!

What I would do is choose a special place instead, LaT. That's what DH's sister in Australia does to remember their dad. She has a tree she planted for him. Somewhere you can always go that might be significant.

Have good weekend all. Cycling sounds great!

I do remember her and if anything really improtant memories are really vivid.
These can be really stupid moments that mean nothing to anyone else but epitomise my mum.
I dont think anything concrete reminds me tbh. I have ornaments of hers , photos around the house etc.
I also have always told the dc of her , that she was their nan.
They talk about her and when they do it makes me smile. Although its sad i feel glad they have remembered her.

I sometimes feel we put pressure/guilt on ourselves to keep up the active memories , the flowers at the cemetry (the diary) but if i am honest those things mean very little to me now. I will never forget her , yeah her voice fades but i dont forget it its just blurry. Just because you dont keep up a ritual doesnt mean you forget.
I honestly think talking about them keeps the memories alive and remembering the good and the bad means you remember who they were.
Hope that makes sense...
I love to talk about her and rarely do so dont ever feel 'out of order' for asking

LaT can imagine your bleak feelings about the house. I was very happy for my father to remarry, but i found it hard see the house i grew up in get sold.Maybe it is easier to go back after it has been sold and it is lived in again. But that is very personal.

My mum died in December 1997, when dh and i got our first flat. she missed my wedding . I do feel she is very far away now. Although I will never forget her I feel she dies just when we were starting an adult relationship. Plus she was not the easiest.

DH is lots better, very huggy and cuddly, so i am better too.just very tired, not sleeping well. just too many memories, wondering if i need to get more therapy. What keeps haunting me is that I was holding Nathan and did not notice he was not breathing, it was dh who pointed out that he was blue. It makes me feel so bad still. Wish I could move on

Lucky well done on hols lovely to go away together.

Ange yey for kitchen, you must be counting the days until it is all over

JKS bet you were so happy that H took steps for you too well done H!

Simpson glad the jabs were ok

Nathan laughs when I say no and look serious. Hilarious apparently . He keeps hitting me in the face with his raisin box, so then i take it away for 30secs and he cries and keeps pointing at it. so i give it back and he hits me again. repeat at nauseum

His cm took him to coffee morning in church and he made his way round all the old ladies eating all their toast he is insatiable! Had a whole jar, a slice of toast and a pot of yogurt for dinner. He has such a fat tummy!

lily when did your mum die?

MM you dont really sound your old self.
I guess you have to look at what happened with Nathan as an unexpected. You were innocent and couldn't have been any different.

Hindsight is a wonderful thing but you were never going to have that so you cant beat yourself up about it.

Even if you did it again knowing what you know wont make you, or expect you, to forsee any problems that can arrise with a baby.

If more counselling will help you you should consider it definately.

Madmouse - glad Nathan has fat tummy Molly's eating is back up today. For tea she had tuna, mashed potato and veg and a jar of banana rice pudding.

Dietitian told me no jars for DD although i do cheat and give her the pudding ones...

Have to be a bit sparing with her ff as I cocked up and ordered it a bit late and won't get any more till Monday afternoon.

Councilling might be the way to go...do you think it is because you are worried about it happening again, not that it will

She died in July 2001 i was 24 my sis was 21 and my youngest sis just turned 16(party in the hospice) before she died aged 45.
Was a shock and she never got to be a gran which i feel sad about.
Ds was born following summer.

That must have been so hard Lily, my brother was in his first year of uni and in a way I think he was hit hardest. Mum was only 50 annd although she first had cancer at 40 it still was unexpected.

I do not feel my old self I am normally such a happy bunny. I am talking about things lots though, which helps me deal with it. Have long chats with a friend on facebook about it, he is a good listener and has been through alot himself. and dh is a great help listening when i go on about it again. he has his own memories too.

Simpson it probably will not happen again but dh and the rest of the world better find a hiding place when I manage to conceive again. I will be one stressed out bunny for nine solid months.

Lilyloo - DH very that his dad passed away before DS was born.

DH had always told me even before we were expecting DS that his proudest moment would be to take his first born child home to Ireland and put her/him in his dad's arms.

His dad passed away in June and DS was born in August.

DH also says its smells that remind him of his dad ie Christmas tree smell will suddenly remind him of childhood Xmas's when he least expected it which he found comforting...

Also certain dinner smells as his dad did all the cooking when he was growing up.

MM i know what you mean will be a worrying time for you , glad you talking about it though.
So about your mum.

Simps i know what your dh means i think its those memories that are most important.

Madmouse - sorry you are not yourself..you certainly haven't seemed as up beat as normal.

Glad you have someone to chat too and you have us

Can't believe we will all (well most) get to meet in RL soon too Can't wait!!

I kniw will be weird meeting next week given we know so much about each other yet i have no idea what you all look like
How will i find you all ??

We will be the rowdy bunch at the back with the noisy well behaved children!!

Oh can soon remedy that

LOL will have martha the escape artist and Molly the whinger strong willed one!!

Morning all

Lots of s in last nights posts, but it is good to share.

Nathan is currently having his two weetabix PLUS TOAST

Lily we will find each other I am sure.

Just gather round the sand coloured Phil and Teds with the beautiful blond boy not many of those in Coventry

I know Lucky and her friend's faces pretty well by now and certainly will recognise their kids. You wil be recognisable by having three beautiful kids in tow, the simpson plus mixedmama combo will be easy enough to spot at the station, I know what JKS looks like from facebook, we will get there.

Anyone else joining us? cmon gals you dont want to miss this!