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October 2007 These Little Piggies chased the easter bunny..and stole the eggs

819 replies

TheLadyEvenstar · 17/01/2009 19:09

Hiya

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Mine · 20/01/2009 10:58

oh goodness, Inzi, LLL, Stefka , FT i am so very sorry for what you all have been through and in some cases are struggling through right now.
I wish i could be there and give you each a hug.
You all sound such strong, amazing women that i am so touched to know.
You will get through this Inzi with your grandad and both have peace.

Muppet - you're being such an amazing mum to Ollie. You know exactly what he needs. To me it sounds as though he might be a bit bored and a little under challenged in class (but i'm not a teach). Can not do something to stimulate him more in class and avoid the naughty behaviour....??

LES - its so amazing that Karl is going to have his poem published. He is obviously very bright and the other kids just feel threatened by this. Bullying is a horrible thing to go through at any age, but it does stay with you for a long time. You're doing the best thing possible by being there for him to talk to and do something about it.

News from me..........Eren is going through his terrible two's at 15 months! its driving me nuts. He has been doing so many cute things though to make up for it too .... like turning the vacuum cleaner off from the mains switch because its too loud and interrupting his play
On another note DH and i keep squabbling about one thing or another. Since having Eren we have been doing this more and more..... does anyone else know what i mean...?? I just think that maybe we are hitting a bit of a rough patch and can't seem to get out of it. Its making me really sad, angry and frustrated. We do talk things through al the time, never go to bed angry with each other, but i just find myself saying sorry all the time. I'm tired of it. I just want things to be back as they used to be.......

inzidoodle · 20/01/2009 12:14

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muppetgirl · 20/01/2009 12:58

Hi all

Very interesting reading everyone's experience of religion.

My mother (and her family) are catholic but my dad isn't anything so they decided to let us choose. We all went to a C of E school where I was (and still are) very happy with the existence of God. I did an Alpha course whilst at Uni but found that frustrating as the Christians I met although nice, very defensive about anyone asking questions. I have always had issues with the authenticity of the bible as we argue about the authenticity of music that was only written in the 16/17th century and have many editions of scores that are purported to be the 'original' Also the bible was written in retrospect way after Christ had actually died by people who idolised him which I do find slightly biased. Also other scripts weren't included that were written at the time so what did they say?

I worked in a Catholic school and they knew I wasn't a catholic but was more than happy to support the ethos. At first all was fine, for 2 years, till the head left and a knew one was appointed. She made it perfectly clear that as I wasn?t a catholic I wasn?t a member of the club and opportunities soon started drying up -management training was withdrawn and given to a teacher who was a catholic yet I had been teaching longer and had been told I was of high enough calibre. I had my music responsibilities reduced as not being a catholic I 'didn't know what music to organise' as it had to be 'liturgically correct' (ie music for assemblies and mass) The previous head was more than happy for me to plan and she would check...
I was told that I could organise the carol concert, teach, play and conduct which I found highly amusing as wasn?t Christmas the celebration for Christmas yet that was okay for me to do by myself????
I was asked to leave meetings as 'catholic' stuff was being discussed and the situation really became unbearable.

I do have my own spirituality in that I believe I'm here for a reason that I'm on a path and that I am being guided though I do have my own free will. I do believe that religion in its barest bones i.e. a set of rules on how to live with people focussing on how to behave and how to respect others is, in essence, a good idea but the religiosity i.e. how we interpret those rules hugely gets in the way. (Just look at the one bible we have and the many different religions based on it ?Catholic, protestant, and Jehovah?s witnesses. They all insist they?re the ones who got it right and the others are wrong) Being told that you've used the wrong cloth for a mass when you've never organised one before (class mass, had to do from scratch) is a bit picky in my opinion and not supportive, Christians (present company accepted x)looking down their noses at those the perceive not to be Christian enough or believing they are 'better' than everyone else. God is the ultimate judge and he will judge me as he will everyone else when the time comes. He doesn't love me any more or less than anyone else.

I think that unexplained things do happen, Inzi you and dh had one such after the birth of Angel and I believe you had it for a reason. LLL, your dad, who was not a believer, was comforted by what he saw and in his final hours he found peace which is an amazing thing for him and your family. I know I will see all those I've lost again and have long chats about how I lived my life and the choices I made. I do believe that I will get the chance to say things I missed and asked questions I never had the time to, or the inclination. So Floria I believe you will have the chance to say all you needed too and more to your dad and he will hug you and tell you how proud he is of you but above all how wonderful it was to watch Alex group if only from above. My granddad is above still commenting on how messy I look, my Nan will be giggling with her pink cheeks after her one whisky and my friend who died will smile at me with an inner peace she never found whilst actually living.

muppetgirl · 20/01/2009 13:15

Blimey that was a bit long!

Henry was up for 2 hours last night screaming we think due to teeth dh had to go to Asda (his idea of torture ant time of the day orat night!!) at 12 midnight to get calpol. Henry was fine with me (picking my nose and grabbing my teeth whilst giggling ) until I tried to put him back in his cot. Not wanting food really so I'm trying to give him extra milk.

inzidoodle · 20/01/2009 13:34

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muppetgirl · 20/01/2009 13:40

Inzi I think the letter is fab and that you're telling them of how great they've been but that you understand things are bad but your looking forward to what is left.

Teething's crap isn't it??????
Henry ust wants to be with us but that's fine if he went to sleep but no, he'll grab noses, poke eyes and giggle his head off. Great he's stopped screaming but WE'RE TRYING TO SLEEP!!!!!! Makes me think too.

alicet · 20/01/2009 17:33

Also thought your post was brilliant muppet!

Inzi I personally am totally happy to give Adam nurofen / calpol when I know he's teething. He sleeps better so is happier and a very beneficial side effect is that so am I! I don't see anything wrong with giving drugs to numb the pain if it is so bad she is screaming and upset without it. Adam usually gets it for a couple of nights before the tooth is through and he is then much happier. understand your concerns but I think they do have a role here. good luck.

Mine dh and I struggled to adjust after Sam was born. I think there was resentment on both sides - from me as I did the majority of the night shifts and from him as he saw me going out with friends and doing nice stuff on my days off. I think he really 'got' it when Adam was born and he had time looking after Sam on his own and more latterly them both. And realised that it is actually bloody hard work never mind what you are doing to amuse them and you. There is much les resentment on boh sides now and we are both happier. Could this be an issue for you? I imagine it might be accentuated if you are a fulltime mum as well. I think it is very hard to see that you both are having a tough time adjusting. Good luck sorting it out.

Hello everyone else! I am at work on call but its not very busy as you can see! just off to check on one of the patients I have admitted now but I might be back later depending on what I am up to.

Take care xxx

muppetgirl · 20/01/2009 18:29

Inzi - Ollie was 'calpoled' quite a lot as he seemed to really suffer with his teeth whereas Henry seems to only suffer occasionally -hence we ran out of calpol something we would have never done with Ollie! I just think Like Alice really, if they are in pain and I can do something about it then I do as I know it won't last forever.

Mine - The transition from couple to family is hard and I think it is underestimated by everyone having children. Dh and I hardly ever argued until we had Ollie and then it seemed never ending (remember the 'what line??? That fucking line!!!!! argument?) It does get easier xxx

I have stuffed Henry to within an inch of his digestive system so trying to do as much as possible to help him sleep. For tea he had 2 eggs scrambled, a third of a tin of rice pudding, about 20 rasberries and some syrup cake. Stodgy though not necessarily good for him he then had 6ozs of milk to top it all off.
Nurophened him just in case as I felt like shit this morning and so much he after 2 hrs of screaming in the night! (Him not me )

Have booked him in for tumble tots on Monday -anyone else gone before? Just to see if that'll help him get moving. He wants to stand and comes to you for help and LOVES it when he does so we're making progress...

Stefka · 20/01/2009 18:49

Not been to tumble tots myself but have heard good things about it.

Had a bad night here too - Dareh was very restless and kept waking up then was up fro 12-3am. I didn't get to bed until just after three. He's gone down tonight so fingers crossed it's a bit better.

Alice I didn't watch that hunter programme because I knew it would be too upsetting. Can't deal with stuff like that these days - way too over sensitive.

Inzi I think a letter is lovely idea - that way it can be re-read anytime and will be remembered more.

Muppet I am really shocked at the way you were treated at that school. That is really disgusting - work bullying really. One thing I noticed when I was in the church was they hated people asking questions. One of the many lovely demons I apparently have is a spirit of rebellion which I had because I asked too many questions and challenged some of the teachings of the leaders. I also questioned some of the things in the bible. It's a very interesting book but having now studyied it at bible school it is full of inconsitiencies and some of the stuff is just down right offensive. I really think that the church is institutionally sexist and the bible is used to support a lot of that and don't even get me started on the homophobia! One of my dear friends was driven to a complete mental breakdown when the church tried to 'cure' him of his homosexuality. He ended up in hospital.

Some of the people were amazing though - really living the life so to speak - very gentle and humble and I have a lot of admiration for them. Sadly I feel the spiritual abuse going on was far greater than anything else.

muppetgirl · 20/01/2009 19:02

Steka - I totally agree with the spiritual abuse idea and the sexisim really annoyed me. I remember the priest sitting in my class talking to my year 3's and saying that his greatest regret was not having children and he hoped that things would change for future priests (looking at history there's no reason to think it couldn't change again, throughout history they could marry, then they couldn't, then they could -another inconsitency!) I remember being shocked as the new head told the whole school that our school was better than any other because we had the holy spirit...
I was told I probably went to a 'proddy school' as I didn't genuflect at the altar..
One teacher was openly telling of her affair whilst another was living in sin which was all fine becasue they were fully paid, bona fida members of the club. I wasn't and would never be and she made that perfectly clear. One of my dear friends used contraception before having children for years but this is okay as she went to church every sunday. I don't get the picking and choosing element.

muppetgirl · 20/01/2009 19:09

...have to say though the nuns were the most amazing bunch of women you'd ever want to meet!!! The school was attached to a convent whcih the missionary nuns (kick arse, convert the world and do good at the same time type nuns) were great. They would try to get the boys to climb up the trees to pick the fruit as it was a 'crying waste!!!!' I would be writing on my board and I would trun round to find 2 sheepish children standing holding their books and when I asked them where the heck their table was they just said 'sister Tess took it...' They were quiet and very nimble with the determination of 1000's of Jack Russells. Shame they all came to die though...
and they also always sent us out of date chocolates at Christmas for all of the staff!

Stefka · 20/01/2009 19:13

Lol at the nuns coming in to nick the tables in your lesson! They sound fab!

HeinzSight · 20/01/2009 21:42

Hi everyone, sorry I haven't been around for a while. I'm all over the place and don't know where I belong! Still can't believe it!!

Inzi, I just wanted to say how sorry I am that you're going through this, you sound amazingly strong. Look after you x x

alicet · 20/01/2009 22:07

Hello Heinz - have been thinking of you and hoping all is well xxx

Muppet and Stefka I think both of your negative experiences of religion sums up one of my main bugbears with it. I know this represents such a small minority of people but unfortunately I think that what they do spoils it for everyone and alienates many more people than are persuaded into faith by people who act in a way I would consider Christian.

Hope the christians on this thread are not feeling as though they are being ganged up on though! I have plenty of respect for different beliefs to my own and am very interested to read everyones stories so far about how they think as they do

Well my on call was boringly quiet. All good for the people of Ashington but boring for me! I did get a couple of hours chilling in front of the telly which is always nice when you have 2 small children but having said that I would have preferred to be busy. Oh well never mind! i have my 2 days with the boys now and I'm looking forward to it. no plans for tomorrow - we'll do some bits and pieces and just see what happens really!

inzidoodle · 20/01/2009 22:31

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Stefka · 21/01/2009 08:53

I hope so too alice because like I say it wasn't everyone - I was just unfortunate to encounter a pretty toxic combination of people\churches.

2 days with the boys sounds nice - hope you enjoy it!

TheLadyEvenstar · 21/01/2009 11:41

Ladies, I have a dilemma...

You all know that i recently had a meeting with my brother. well there are arrangments for us all to meet on my birthday next weekend. I don't know if i want to go! My mum gave him one of my dads rings for him to keep and it has left me feeling odd....i don't know maybe it is anger? I do want to go but i don't at the same time iyswim?

OP posts:
Stefka · 21/01/2009 12:01

Sounds tricky. Are you able to indentify why you want to go and why you don't want to go? I think if it is your birthday then you should do what you want to do!

TheLadyEvenstar · 21/01/2009 12:36

Stefka I want to go as he is my brother and I have not grown up with him I want to get to know him, what i have seen of him there are a lot of similarities to my dad in him if that makes sense...I also want to meet my niece and nephew.....however they are not going to know who i am and for now are going to be told we are old friends as he does not want to confuse them which is fair enough they are still so young. I am not sure why I don't want to go...I think part of me see's him as reminding me of my dad and I do miss him so terribly much especially on or around my birthday as he made it so much fun. I want to meet my sil as well.

I think part of me wonders what took him so long in getting in touch.. maybe it is bitterness because he left it too long to see my dad again and i know my dad always missed him, more than his daughter i think.
I think today I am just tired as for some reason I am not sleeping although i am going to bed early and Zachary is sleeping all night as usual.

OP posts:
Stefka · 21/01/2009 12:42

Maybe arrange it for another time so you can relax and enjoy your birthday. Sorry to hear you are not sleeping - that's horrible. Stress? I am getting the same thing - go to bed exhausted every night and then just lie there unable to relax enough to sleep. Really frustrating.

inzidoodle · 21/01/2009 14:15

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NeedCoffee · 21/01/2009 18:31

just popping in while i can make sense at the moment-am taking champix to try and stop smoking and it is making my head very fuzzy and really sleepy, this mornings has worn off a bit so can actually get my fingers to type! I'm having to try and take it after i have got things i need to do, done as i just can't function properly within an hour of taking them, especially driving, and i sat at college all day yesterday not taking anything in-hope my body gets used to them soon!

muppet-lmao at the nuns!
Inzi-how are things going? am thinking of you.
FT-thinking of you also, I hope you're OK
LES-I think you should go, you may regret it if you don't. Still coming down this Sat? DD1 can't decide whether to stay or go to her Dads, am going to show her your pics on FB later.
Hi Heinz, sorry you're struggling to come to terms with everything-thats what we're here for though-to give you support and also to nag you to dish the dirt!
Alice-hope yuo're enjoying your days off

On the subject of teeth-DD1s grandma has DD2 on a Tues while i'm at college, and found another tooth on the bottom yesterday-which means she has 3 on the bottom and 1 on the top strange child!

On the subject of religion-I don't practice any religion, and don't know enough about any of them to make a judgement, saying that, its unlikely I would judge anyway-each person have the right to believe what they like imo.

D'you know what I love about you lot-whenever I see other threads where any of you have posted, I never ever see any of you being judgemental or nasty which makes me so happy i was due in Oct-dunno who i would have ended up with on an antenatel thread if i'd been due a different month! You really are all amazing individuals

muppetgirl · 21/01/2009 18:33

hi all bad day with Ollie so if anyone's bored can you take a look at this please...

my son's deteriorating behaviour

muppetgirl · 21/01/2009 18:36

..am hoping the person who has just copied my post, put it into paragraphs and re posted it was just trying to help and not someone from pedant's corner

NeedCoffee · 21/01/2009 19:10

think she was trying to be helpful muppet not sure why she felt the need though..