Morning all,
Had a no sleep night, I think cos of poo in pants worries and too much laptop and tv just before bed. Tried to put a long post on last night and lost it, 6 hrs later would like some advice on how to start a thread.
Or I could just get some FMLs advice since it can be scary out there!
I went to DS1's parents evening on Monday, alone cos DH was ill (he took the day off which means he was feeling close to death). And we mostly discussed his toileting. He is 3.5 and has been out of nappies for a year ( I wanted to get him sorted a few months before the arrival of Pond aka DS2). He wasn't interested but after a week of wees in pants he got the hang of it. It has been up and down. Quite bad in the summer when if it wasn't wees and poos in pants it was bad behaviour at nursery. They asked DH if there had been any changes at home, I felt they were asking him if we were getting a divorce! Anyway I did feel a 3 month old may be causing him to seek attention in hitting and wetting/soiling. And again things were up and down, just when we'd have a few weeks of clean pants then we'd have accidents again. The HV gave me tips when DS2 was born, but I've never really felt that his problem was to get attention, I just think he doesn't care. Life is too interesting to go to the toilet,and someone will clean you up anyway.
So on Monday his keyworker at nursery said she thought he may have a bowel problem since he did it whilst playing getting lots of one to one attention, and then asked if I would mind if she spoke to my HV. I now feel I should speak to my HV. The keyworker said she would be getting worried if he was going to school in Septmeber but since he's a September baby we have 18 months to sort him out.
I'm just getting a bit wound up about it now. It's not so much the wees, it's more common for it to be a poo accident. If I ask him why he didn't say he needed to go he just says because I didn't. I think he has bowel control cos sometimes he doesn't go for days and 'sends it away' where he won't go on the loo. I think he's had dirty pants every day for the past week.
He did a small one at nursery this morning in his pants. But did a big one while upstairs with Daddy this evening. DH made him clean out his pants himself (he was in the middle of a DIY project) and he brought them down to me to put in the washing machine. It seems really mean, but I think getting him to sort himself out a bit after may work. DH put him in a nappy on Sunday after his accident but not sure the 'you can be a baby if you want' approach is the right way to go.
We've done stickers, in fact nursery still do them. And he gets loads of praise when he does do it on the toilet. I've even started giving him chocolate when poos go down the loo not the pants (something I thought I'd never do, reward with food especially choc). And we don't tell him off. I did pretend to cry this evening to show him how sad I was, but DH was cross with him and was dealing with it so I had to butt out.
Sorry for such a long ramble but lack of sleep has intensified things and both my darlings are going to nursery today. DS2 was tearful all last Thursday visit apparently so worried about that.
Would post this in appropriate place but can't work out how, and not sure if would get advice!
I'm sort of hoping he's had what DH has had ( and I had a bit), but it was stomach cramps aswell as frequent loo trips. But I did change 3 dirty nappies for DS2 this morning in the space of an hour, I think about 6 in total today . And it was over a week ago it escalated to a poo a day...