November 2008 - Cooing babies, tired ladies

[LackaDAISYcal]

now I'm off to catch up.

Hello again

Bit of messing about at bedtime here- I think we were al missing DH as he is back at work today. I kept saying to myself 'I can't do this' (baby crying, children not being naughty just being littlees) then stopped myself and told myself I could do it, and felt much better, instantly. PMA, hey, Choc?!

DD1 is still not happy bunny. Such a daddy's girl, really, bless her.

merry thanks I was very nervous about it.Sounds like you had a lovely meet-up. Really looking forwaRD TO NEXT WEEK.

Eye colour- takes at least a year or so to get to their colour, as far as I'm aware. DS's were blue and are now green with brown in the middle, like mine, and DD1's are similar, though more of a grey green.

choc you sure you don't have haemerroids? They can be internal, but would give the effect you describe.

Dozy well done on the sleep thing. I can't believe DS was sleeping all night by this stage. Bliss. I really hope Imi does soon. Ithink she is dropping her 11:30 feed, as it's getting smaller and later. Here'shoping!

WEnt to Boots today and got some lovely clothes in the sale for next year, they had a lot of their gorgeous 'molly and jack' range on sale.

smiles all advice welcome! i actually have that cot toy thing still in the box.....must get it set up!!
as for routine, i have realised that GF is impossible (for me) to follow 100% so i am now happy to take on the principles and aim for the times she suggests which normally means im an hour before of after IYKWIM

yes fab advice, smiles, and choc definitely recoomend some sort of soothing music box- in time they will love it- DD1 pops hers on herself if she wakes (age 2.3) and snuggles back to sleep!

VBAB sorry just seen your message on buggies, we are going to france in May and I didn't want to take the travel system, I am finding the pushchair I had for my son which I am using for DD too heavy and big, my DH started to look on the net and found a really lightweight buggy which can be used from birth, lies baby flat and you can then gradually "sit" them up, it only weighs about 6 KG and folds down really small it is a petit star something or other, (off now to find it on the net for you)........

Back now, found it on the mothercare site although i think DH got it cheaper elsewhere, there is also a site with a little video of it being used and folded up and down to look at but he has buggered off to the pub so let me know if you are interested and I will get him to find the site - you can have a look at it on the mothercare site in the meantime - "Petite Star Zia Stroller - Black, Website exclusive: You won't find this product instore! Lightweight Aluminium Chassis, Suitable from birth, Unique Compact Fold" I got the footmuff to go with it and the raincover it is great for the school run (due to distance I have to drive to school and then walk a bit so it is easy and quick to use and baby is kept all toasty inside) I highly recommend this and am going to take it on holiday (everywhere), with me - hope this helps.

X

Smiles

Thanks Furry and chocolate I had my 6 week check and the GP didn't seem concerned - he just said it would take time to heal (but sometimes I am not sure how much GP's know ). Haemerroids sounds - I might try and get it checked out again then - perhaps get a private referral??

chocolate for the GF long lunchtime nap M often wakes after 30-60 mins, sometimes I have to go in and resettle him (shh-ing him but not picking up) and sometimes he cries for 1-2 mins and resettles himself. Make sure you give E a chance to do that before going in (I only go in if M cries for 2 minutes continuously). I find if M has a long lunchtime nap he is happy and alert in the afternoon but if not he is really cranky.

smiles - the petite star (was about £90) is the buggy I had first and took it back because couldnt fit a board to it and DS was too big for it when it was used by him. I got from Argos the m&p aria. its fab and was the same price as the star for the buggy, car seat, box attachment for car, 2 raincovers, 2 cosy toes and 2 bags! Just dont want to take the car seat. FYI ... the aria is currently ON SALE ON ITS OWN (not travel system) AT ARGOS FOR £47 ish and is a fantastic buggy. Light and so easy to push. Might just try A in it and see how far it reclines and how comfy she looks. Good idea?

Evening

Smiles as Furry said, DS1, who is 2.6, still has his cot music toy and he still plays it every time he wakes up in the night (although he has now added his Thomas CD to the list of things he needs to get to sleep so he often has both going at the same time!) - he has had it since he moved into his cot and 6 months so that is 2 years me and DH have been forced to listen to the music 2 or 3 times a night....aaaaah!! We are definitely buying a new one for Sam as there is no way I am listening to that music for another 2 years!!

I dug out my GF book today just for a nosy... I had forgotten how prescriptive she is about the mum and telling us when to have a drink/lunch etc Gave me a bit of a giggle anyway. Her feeding routine is way out of the 3-hourly one that I thought was recommended for babies this age though

Am still trying to decide how to get Sam to bed at 7pm but still bath him with DS1 as they both really enjoy it. DS1 has his bath at about 6.45 for a 7.30 bedtime....so I guess I would have to bring bathtime forward by half an hour to get Sam to bed for 7 - not sure DS1 would be happy about that. Dozy do you bath all yours at 6 as GF suggests? What time do your boys go to bed then?

The argos one sounds great - not thought about the board bit as I don't really need one.

Defo think you should try it, they grow so fast and if baby looks comfy - I think it better for baby to be in a semi reclined position - don't like them to be in car seat for too long (ie my old 3 in 1 meant baby was in car seat for journey and in car seat still for wherever we were then still in it for journey back) IFSWIM? DD seems to be grumpy in the car seat - I think she gets trapped wind.

X

Smiles

Smiles Sam always gets grumpy in his car seat and looks really uncomfortable and all scrunched up so I always transfer him to the pram - for some reason DS1 never seemed to mind and never looked as uncomfortable so I used it as a travel system much more with him.

HI Ceebee74.

I try and bath baby just before DS. I am not prescriptive whether she has had a bottle before or after her bath, it depends on when she had the last bottle. Would like to get it so I can bath them roughly at same time (after she has had bottle) and then to bed for them both, we managed this the other night and had both asleep and we sat down on our own at 8pm which was fab!! Will persevere and try to get it to happen again.... and again ..... and again .....

X

Imi doesn't like being in the car seat, either. I have not missed having the 'travel system' adapters at all this time around- we just transfer her to pram or sling every time and she settles fine.

I think we only really used it if going to do a big shop, but now we have a huge boot we don't really need to save the space.

MIne do all go to bed at the same time, ceebs. I don't put them to bed before 7 as they wake ridiculously early if I do, so it's 7:30 ish in our house. Imi likes to have another poo and a bit more milky though so actually falls asleep nearer to 8:30!

Evening all!
Had a lovely time at Bluewater today with Obs and Autumnlady, they're both lovely and it was nice to meet up with the LOs and have a good chat
I think it was Betti asking about dribbling - we were discussing this today and all three of our babies are dribblers. Perhaps teething is starting or perhaps it's just a stage they're going through
Rutho pmsl at the poomageddon - E had one of those at Bluewater, I was gone for so long that Obs and Autumn were wondering if I'd done a runner! She then did another one as I was giving her a quick feed in the car before heading home so I had to change her on the back seat trying not to get the poo everywhere, lovely!
Smiles Thanks for the tips for settling - I just had a look online for the waterfall soother and everywhere seems to have sold out! Typical. I'll have to keep checking and see when they get some in. We're not doing too badly at night though - 11pm to 5.15am last night It's just evenings - E still seems to need to feed almost constantly between 6 and 11 with short cat naps in between. There's no way I could put her down at 7pm.
Hana Like Daisy I've found there are days when E needs to feed more than others, especially in the evenings and not necessarily at the times when growth spurts are meant to happen. I mentioned it to the hv yesterday and she said it was completely normal and seemed surprised that I even mentioned it.

smiles - been told since a board cant go on the aria either! But IS a beyond fantastic and CHEAP buggy in my opinion. A seems to be ok in the car seat but doesnt like the initial putting her in IYSWIM.
My aria buggy
Aria on offer (diff colour?) sale £48.93
I got the aria and all the extras I mentioned in my previous post for £99, I think it was a misprint in the sale brochure and should have been £199 but Argos had to stand to it and didnt even argue .

Hi all. As usual I haven't caught up but I really need to post....

Ever since finding out I was pregnant I have intended returning to work part time. All day Tues, Wed & Thurs. We have a creche on site and I have booked him in for those days.

My line manager (LM) says my post can not be reduced to part time hrs. I agree. However, I look after 2 distinct areas and so I believe it could be made into 2 part time posts for job share. Some work would need to be consolidated but it is not much at all (1 - 2% once a month) and I am mature enough to volunteer to do it / draw straws. My LM disagrees but has said, all along, that I mustn't worry, the management chain will find me a part time post.

So I've booked child care for Tues - Thurs and told everyone I'm returning, to a different job, part time......

I officially requested part time hours on 1st Sept.

Today I received an email saying they wouldn't make my job part time NOR job share. The job share reasons are a little wooly and might not stand up as 'good business reasons' (but I'll go down that route if necessary). Anyway it goes on to say that 'as per my statement of intent' I will have to repay my enhanced maternity pay if I don't return for 1 month full time and GET THIS they will try to find a PART TIME job for me to work so I can do 18.5 hrs a week for 2 months!!!! So they'll try and find a part time job for me to work my notice?????!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

There is NO mention of 'don't worry, they'll find you a part time post'....... All the assurance is now missing.

I rang the HR people who said to ask him to put the line about finding me a job in. SO I've emailed him that - a direct challenge for him to either admit he lied or that his LM lied.

I have left a message for the unions.....

I know that by law there is no obligation to provide a part time post but to reassure me I'll have a post and then send this is disgusting!! Of course I don't have this written down so it'll be my word against his.

What really annoys me is that he's a lovely bloke and I trust(ed) him completely - so who's lying to me?

I guess I'll have to consider going back full time until I can find a part time post (rarer than star dust) or leave completely.... Not a good idea in the current climate.....

after DS's massive milk expulsion into the bath he was sharing with DD and DS1, I always feed after bath!

I forgot to mention earlier in my lame-brained fogetfulness.....I fed B at 10.30 last night and was in bed by 11. He was asleep by midnight and slept till 3.30, fed and then that was him until nearly 8 this morning......How's that for progress?

Well done on talking to the GP Pinky; if you are anyhting like me, I always feel better after unburdening.

We got a buggy from Toy'R'Us that is really lightweight, but goes almost flat. I had a look and can't find it now, but this one looks like a good buy. I saw this in mothercare though and it looks really compact. it's nice and light as well.

choco...it could, as pinky suggested, be internal piles. I can send you some anusol suppositories if you like? dead glam, me

rutho...half a stone in a week!!!!! What's your secret?

can't think what else I read and there have no doubt been loads more posts since I started this.

Rutho PMSL at your comments on the lovely GF (alcoFrolic, huge-haired, misery guts) and Tracey (who, sadly, is dead. No really - she is!)

PinkyFurry love the new name!!

Hmm - I have been trying, REALLY trying to do GF. Promise. Even called the lovely choc today for chit-chat about it. My little Plum just prefers going to bed a little later than GF suggests.

So last night I sat in the darkened nursery (again) for 2.5 hours. In the end, I admitted defeat and came down to eat. Then went back upto bed with her at 9:30pm, asleep by 10pm - AND she slept through til 6:30am!! (with a very wet nappy I might add!)

The night before was very similar, I gave her a "dream feed" at 4:30am for 10 mins, then straight down again.

So - she can clearly make it through the night (as that bearded crooner krisKristofferson once sang).
So, as DH pointed out tonight, why are we trying so damned hard to get her down at 7pm?

Tonight she finally went down at 8:30pm in nursery. So now, do I let her sleep til she wakes? Gina Ford doesn't explain how you adapt if baby takes 2 hours to go down...

HARUMPH!
P.S. She took the EBM bottle today from DH - first time in days!! Hooray! Thanks choc for advice! We gave her a cheeky bottle at 5pm when normally she would get breast.

Re. huge babies - Plum is gigantic. A bit like James and the Giant Peach. It's Monkey and the Giant Plum.

P.S. rutho congrats on masseeeve weight loss!! Good on ya!!
I went to gym Monday and did 30 min run outside this morning (in the dark)! Fortunately I have a DH who is around to hold the LO whilst I indulge in fitness stuff.
Still eating loads of sh*te though.

Thanks monkey/daisy monkey you know what I'm going to say.. go with your baby, not book! sounds like you are all doing really well.

8Daisy*I actually felt a bit guilty about alking about it. I still feel paranoid. It is very silly

I did half an hour on the Wii fit on Monday and again this evening. I like the step aerobics, but am pretty unco-ordinated. that and a bit of walking has made a difference to me this week.

Can you amend things on the Wii? I somehow managed to put in the weight of my clothing as zero but was wearing heavy jeans and a jumper and it told me I've gained 6lbs since Monday and has plotted that on the chart!

Bumble is sitting in his chair talking to a picture of DS1 that is on the shelf; very cute

sounds like you have all had lovely meet-ups down south this week. I'm really looking forward to next Friday, and may even get a hair appointment before then so I can look a bit more yummy than I do at the minute!!

Hi all!
Was so great to see lovely Merry this aft!! Your babies are gorgeous Am sat here finishing off the biccies Glad you liked the flat - is rented but hundred million times better than our last flat which had rats in walls (scratch/ squeek) and damp cracked walls and ceiling - bah!

Am feeling cautiously happy - got W down at 9.30 and heard him crying (full on WAAAAH) a few mins later but left him for a minute (literally - standing outside bedroom )
and he stopped and haven't heard anything since (that's blown it then!!)

My dh is away in L.A for work having a loverly time no doubt - bit scary but day 2 and coping o.k. I think. Was tearful mon/tues before he went - anticipating horrific times ahead but just decided that if W is warm and fed that's all that is important and trying not to expect too much.

re: Postnatal check - have not been either. Got W's 6 week check but I also feel fine so don't feel the need really. No need to discuss contraception here either - think the wall is doing a fairly good job at preventing further pregnancies I guess we'll be sleeping together again at some point tho.

mummynic at your work situation!! Sounds like you are doing all the right things to try to get it sorted but still. Awful when you work hard for someone and they take the mick. Is it even legal?? Hope it gets sorted.

barbareebaa sadly I think it is legal. I was full time and have requested to go part time. Their legal requirement is to consider my request. HOWEVER they must have GOOD business reason(s) to refuse. That's where they fail. It can't be a part time post but it could be job share - the excuses not to do job share are:
My incompetent assistant (he's awful) - not my problem - sack him or move him and get a good assistant.
The consolidation of some work - as I wrote above, there is little work to consolidate the accounts at month end and forecast time - we could take turns doing it, the hard work is done within the 2 distinct ares first.
The travel to units for forecasts once a quarter - I have already addressed this and checked my husband can get on the base to drop J off and, if the visit requires travel Mon / Fri then my Dad will look after J.
Oh and the last excuse was 'lengthy handover' of work IF there was a delicate issue!!!! EH???????!!!!! Clutching at straws an that one.

SO I don't think there are any GOOD business reasons against job share.

I shouldn't have this crap whilst trying to bring up a baby.

A couple of years ago I had to do a grievance as I was being bullied and I took it all the way. I think they (not my immediate LM) see this as a way of getting rid of me - I'm 'trouble'. I shall sue their arses for constructive dismissal if I leave. (My bullying claim has been proven by others being bullied since).

You'd think I'd be safe - I work for the Government!!!!

Morning all,

How are we all feeling this morning? Yay Friday! I am chipper as I got up after Fin's 6.30 feed and have hit the ground running - in other words, I have managed to make coffee and drink it.

Fin slept from 11 til 6.30 - good boy! Okay, so he weed all over himself when I changed him this morning and then became hysterical, but mostly successful routineing there.

Mummynic - for you - bloody management. Have you checked with ACAS or your union? Government and local gov are awful, you get some right b*stards... If they are using travel as a reason not to jobshare on the grounds that it might be hard for you as a mum then surely that is sex discrimination?

Barb, mine is doing that with the dribble and the chewing his hand thing too! I am terrified in case he gets teeth before he can hold a teething ring as my life will then be reduced to sitting here holding a teething ring in his mouth all day. Plus, bfing so ow, bitey.

Monkey, are you doing foodfocus? I can't remember as I haven't had enough coffee yet... It's more or less stopped me from eating junk food as I then have to "confess" it and see it on the graph in lovely colours.

Poomageddon be damned - ladies, twas the Poopocalypse! Up to his neck, it was. But it made him so happy.

Routine - gosh I feel bad about saying those things about Tracy, Godresthersoul. Shoot me. However, I am now going for the routine today so wish me luck. I think the main things for me are getting up at set times and going to bed at set times, and all the stuff in the middle is a little more flexible. Right, off for my 8.09 shower...

After a lovely day at Bluewater yesterday, with Cricri and Autumlady - where no actaull shopping was done, becasue we were too busy gassing - and the time just FLEW,
I returned to my dh, who announced, he wanted a seperation.
I know things are bad, but I hadn't realised that things were that bad.

Obs and very for you - was he serious or was he just trying to shock you?? Did you talk about it at all? Surely he realises that things are like they are because of the issues with M?

Rutho good luck with the routine..I am also loosely following Baby Whisperer in that I am feeding Sam every 3 hours and letting naps etc happen in the vain hope a routine will emerge itself....it did with DS1 so you never know.

Mummynic for you having to deal with this sh*t whilst on maternity leave. It sounds like you have got everything covered and know where you stand so you don't need my 'expert' HR advice! However, if you do, let me know and I can give you my e-mail address Or start a thread in Employment Issues....Flowerybeanbag is a complete HR guru and much more knowledgeable than me and could probably help you.

Glad you Southerners all had good meet-ups - I am so looking forward to next Friday although I have realised that Sam has his jabs on Thursday morning so will probably be Mr Grumpypants on Friday!!

Have got Sam's 8-week development check today....have noticed on the paperwork that one of the things they look for is a 'social smile'...damn boy is still not smiling properly - will he get referred (or whatever they do??)

Obs I don't know what to say, Slightly stupid question but how do YOU feel about that? I mean obv you are but do you think it may give you both time to put things into perspective?
Sorry don't mean to be nosy but you have been through such a time if it lately. Big massive hugs to you.

Rutho I can't follow GF either Jay feeds every 3 hours and nothing will change that!!
I too try to gt him up at 7 and in bed preferably sometime before 11pm.
Last 3 nights he has been in bed at 8ish asleep between 9 and 9:30 and hasn't woken until 7AM.

He is a right spotty little thing now but on the up side it doesn't seem to be bothering him and he doesn't have a temp etc. AND the doc said yesterday he def won't be infectious by next Friday so I can come to the Trafford Centre - Yay!

Mummynic [angy] at your work thats really crap! Hope you get something sorted - Can they really MAKE you work your notice or pay your enhanced mat leave back if they can't offer you a suitable post .

Vbab My mate has the twin Aria and has used it from birth for her LO and he has been fine so you should be OK!

Daisy does the wii keep telling you off and saying you must concentrate on the other miis feet to keep up??? It does me

Pinkyfurry well done you telling the GP hope it helps.