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Original poster

APRIL 2008 - The One Where They Can Eat Food & Shoes & Toys ........

987 replies

FrankenSoph73 · 21/10/2008 11:41

Thought as the messages were coming in thick & fast I´d start new thread. Don´t know if it´ll work though. Fingers crossed.

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Are your children’s vaccines up to date?
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ThePFJ · 30/10/2008 17:18

Wow you lot have been talking loads. Plus you made me curious enough to look up the word mooncup on the internet. Am so niave sometimes.

Oma I talk absolute crap sometimes, to myself, to baby, to cats, to mumsnet people who put up with me and to DP. Sometimes I get paranoid about it, but i think sod it... people have good and bad days and I'd rather talk crap than not talk. err.. is that making sense? Anyway.. please don't be afraid to talk on here ever! I love to read what other mums are doing.. it keeps me company.

Have spent most of the day indulging myself downloading music and sorting out the photos/vids I have taken of Jack. Kept me busy I guess....

Sal - How long are you going away for??! Just realised I am going to MISS YOU on here! (cling!!)

xxx

SalLikesCoffee · 30/10/2008 17:32

Oh PFJ, what a lovely thing to say! I'll miss you all so much too, not quite sure how I'll survive without my 5 minutely daily fix. I'm away for the whole of November, with no real internet access. The limited access is probably a good thing, else I'll be sitting there surrounded by family tapping away on my laptop!

re Mooncup research, hehehe. Makes for scary reading, but really is a good thing. Honestly.

SalLikesCoffee · 30/10/2008 17:36

I do (kind of) realise this is just a forum and that it's not strictly real life, but I've decided you're all close enough to real life friends to me! (To those of you that I haven't met in person, if you ARE actually a hairy trucker with a made up 6-month old breath, I'd prefer not to know Ignorance, bliss and all that.

LadyBee · 30/10/2008 17:46

huh, ds has fallen asleep on lap during pre-dinner feed.
how inconsiderate, doesn't he know I've already reheated his carrots?
OMa, I think if you're feeling not 'right' you should go to GP.
What did you end up deciding re formula now that dd2 is on solids?
I didn't get anti-depressants, my gp agreed that i would come off mini-pill and referred me to the counselling service, and as I improved a lot adter stopping pill, didn't feel i needed to go back for meds. Was a bit about counsellig - esp as felt it was chemical for me but has actually been hugely helpful. Thought I was "better" after stopping pill, but how I feel now after several sessions is a world away from how I was before starting. I was offered 6 sessions 1-to-1 and a PND support group - declined group.
Counselling has been an odd experience; v unstructured, conversational, but all about me -- probably only part of my life right now which is solely devoted to how I'm feeling, in itself such a release. Also v helpful in helping to clarify feelings and 'rehearse' discussing with DP - and because I've already done the crying in the session, means can normally stay fairly coherent in later conversation.

oh what timing...ds now woken,

anyway - I like you (and I've even met you ) and have been worried about you so am pleased that you've surfaced and hope you can get some help with how you're feeling.

got to go...there's carrot and squash to be smeared...

ThePFJ · 30/10/2008 18:14

HUG Sal!!!!

I completely think of you all as rl friends. After all, just because its the internet doesn't mean there aren't real people on the other end will real feelings. I do love that most of you have profiles with info and pics in because it makes it more comfortable to talk to you, and the baby pics are fab. I love having people to compare notes with

and LOL Sal.. I often tell nosey internet people I am actually a hairy trucker called 'Greasy Keith' to shut them up. You must have read my mind!

SalLikesCoffee · 30/10/2008 18:18

LOL. From now on I'll refer to you as Greasy Keith

EllieG · 30/10/2008 20:04

Hey all - I am officially a bit rubbish at Mning last couple of weeks. Molly has been poorly and teething and has been soooo grouchy. Someone has replaced my sweet placid little cuddly bundle with this mawling, sqauwling thing which just cries and cries.....

Never mind, tooth is through now. Don't want to her get any more mind.

Everyone else OK?

Will try catch up a bit now if possible

moominsmummy · 30/10/2008 20:31

hello all. Remember me? not been on for absolutely yonks but have occasionally manage to read all your news and how your LO's are doing.

scorpio1 · 30/10/2008 20:31

Hi Ellie

Yes Moomins i remember you

EllieG · 30/10/2008 20:34

Bloody hell you go away for a week and there are a million frillion messages.

Hugs to scorpio. Sorry you are having such a tough time. Sounds like you are making some really good decisions about what you want though, rather than his needs. Reclaim your life a little bit for yourself lady x

Incidentally though - my claim to fame is that Johnathon Rhys Meyers' ugly brother tried to shag me. About 3 years ago. Doubt he would these days [sigh]

And ladybee for being brave and clever. Therapy is good stuff - I've had bucketloads and am now Officially Sane (ish).

Hello to greasy keith LOL

And hugs to Oma too - hope you are feeling more yourself soon x

Hello to VS who I see popped in

And hello to sal and peachy and theshipscat and denny and knitter and MOM and chipmonkey and soph - I think that's everyone since I last posted - have read most posts but am now sleepy and cannot remember what anyone said, sorry.

Do any of you live in north wales or nearby? I am going there for xmas. Though I imagine most MNers living in London for some reason, in sort of trendy urban mummy style. Probably you are all in Islington and spend your days going to baby einstein classes. But if anyone does live out north wales way - fancy meeting up?

Hey - check out my profile - have put on a luverly photo of my luverly girl eating toast today. Ain't she cute [proud mummy emoticon]

scorpio1 · 30/10/2008 20:35
EllieG · 30/10/2008 20:36

Oo hello moominsmummy I remember you

I love the halloween emoticons, am going to use them as much as possible

You alright tonight scorpio?

scorpio1 · 30/10/2008 20:36

Ellie she is so chubby!! In a baby beautiful way of course!

scorpio1 · 30/10/2008 20:37

No, i'm not today, i am trying so hard not to bring it up with him again. i just want him to go away

EllieG · 30/10/2008 20:39

We never got as far as phone numbers scorpio - I just remember him saying he'd like to come round my place covered in baby oil

Then said, hmm not sure my husband would like that very much, and he strangely enough retracted the offer. Considering how that marriage worked out, maybe I shouldn't have bothered refusing! But he was defo the ugly brother. Very spindly and thin. And tiny tiny. Little irishman-in-my-pocket.

scorpio1 · 30/10/2008 20:40

LOLOLOLOL

esp PMSL at baby oil. you could of got in there, and perved at his brother at family do's etc...who knows??

EllieG · 30/10/2008 20:40

How does it end when you do bring it up with him?

Yes I know - she is a gorgeous chunky monkey

scorpio1 · 30/10/2008 20:41

oh he tells me whatever i ask him, and says sorry etc. just dont wanna keep doing it, yknow? Wish he never did this

EllieG · 30/10/2008 20:47

Do you think he is being honest with you? Will take a while to get trust back - so give yourself time. I would be raging if this was me, and I think you have the right to be too. Give yourself a bit of time to rage and be angry as you need to be - personally, I find I can't draw a line under stuff until I have really explored it in my own time, and at my own pace.

Have you thought about going for some relationship counselling? Forgive me if am saying what a million other people have. It's just I was him in my first marriage, if you see what I mean. I sometimes think if we had been able to really talk honestly about our problems it wouldn't have gone so catastrophically wrong as it did. We stuck a band aid on and ignore the signs that there were problems - I think really honest relationship counselling would have really helped us deal with it.

scorpio1 · 30/10/2008 20:50

I think i know why now; so don't really want to explore that anymore. Just want it all to stop . I think he is being mostly honest, yes.

EllieG · 30/10/2008 20:52

You are being incredibly brave and strong, and is really hard. It will stop, but is not going to feel ordinary for a while, and that is tiring. Can you get away at all for a few days? Leave him look after the kids? Sounds like you need a break. Even if is just for a day and a night out would be something. You've been doing all the family stuff recently and perhaps he needs to give you a break.

scorpio1 · 30/10/2008 20:54

I don't feel ican trust him at all to be left. I have a few girly htings planned this next week or so so thats good. Though will be worrying all night about his sodding phone.

EllieG · 30/10/2008 20:57

You have to trust him or you will go mad sitting in the house. And you constantly sitting on him is not going to make him be faithful - he is the only one who can do that. So go out, let you hair down and try and enjoy it lady.

I have to go - Mol is squeeking - will check in tomorrow.

Get some rest hon - thinking of you x

SalLikesCoffee · 30/10/2008 21:25

Hello moominsmummy!

Ellie, Molly is gorgeous! Love the cheeks.

Scorpio, this is so easy for me to say (and I probably wouldn't have been able to listen to my own advice if I was in your shoes), but you have to trust him (or at least pretend if needs be). If he knows you're checking all the time, he would just go on secretly if he wanted to - it really is SO easy to keep something secret if you really want to. If you say you leave this in his hands, that you're not going to keep on upsetting yourself by checking, and that, if he wants to make this marriage work, he should make it work, I honestly think you've got a better chance. By checking, you make it obvious that you don't trust him (which is perfectly understandable, but not really good for the future).

Glad to see you on here tonight btw, have been thinking of you today again. xxx

VictorianSqualor · 30/10/2008 21:51

Oma, I one hundred percent get where you are right now, probably as big part of why I'm only posting sporadically. I'm not depressed, or even struggling, just a but flat iyswim. I think you have my email if you want to talk.

Ellie, she looks gorgeous. Peachy is in wales.

Scorpio, please don't let knowing why (which I agree you do esp after our chats, I really do think that's why)mean you brush it under the carpet. It won't go away if you do honey. You don't ever have to talk about it again, just send him for that help, right? It's not just for this reason he needs a chat with someone is it? He has a few issues that can't be put to rest without someone else helping him, in more ways than one. But remember, it has NOTHING to do with you, NOTHING, or even her. It's a classic 'blame the parents'. I won't say anymore, I hope I haven't already said too much, but please listen sweetheart, before it's too late.