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May 07: The one where SOH gets her tweed clothes and LG&T doesn't get any...

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ShowOfHands · 17/10/2008 13:47

New thread...

OP posts:
Are your children’s vaccines up to date?
MKG · 17/11/2008 12:57

See that's what I keep saying, but dh loves Amelia/ Emily.

I am giving him all kinds of options and he won't budge. I think I'll have to have the baby while he's at work, and fill out the birth certificate before he gets there. Last time I filled it out while in the early stages of labor, so maybe I will get what I want after all.

elkiedee · 17/11/2008 13:23

TYG, congratulations on the toning up, most impressive.

Scoot, I don't know if getting a cleaner, maybe just for a short period, would make a difference to you but if it would it's worth considering. I know you have debts but you need your health to get through those.

Since my dp stopped working shifts (in social care - council residential home) because he's seconded as a full time union rep, I think it's made a difference of more than £100 a month to his take home pay. But the sleep-ins were stressful and the waking nights always made him ill - I'm now not sure when he last had an epileptic fit even with disturbed nights with D. I appreciate it might not be very easy for you to move out of the current working pattern which sounds like it's having a really bad effect, but if there's things you can do to alleviate it, do them.

anneme · 17/11/2008 22:36

Mkg - what about Emilia - a bit different?
I feel a bit of a fraud waltzing in with advice when I have been awol for so long....probably won't stop me though...

BTW - are all the LOs talking? S still just grunts and shouts loudly - mind you don't know if he can get a word in edgeways with me and DS1!

AM - if you were my SS last year it was a lovely pressie!

Aprilmeadow · 18/11/2008 00:53

Am pretty sure it was you but cant remember what i got you. I think i might have gone down the pamper route as you have 2 boys..... i used to have a great memory.

Have been shopping today to get some warmer clothes and saw so many gorgeous girly bits that i wanted to get for LG&T's bump. JAM i wish you knew what you were having then i could find something for him/her.

I could spend a fortune on stuff for the kids in the stores here. There is a lovely shop called Janie&Jack that i have been to a few times and they told me today they ship to the UK, dh wasnt best pleased as he knows how much stuff there was that i liked.

Jack had dh up at 4.50am. Ella woke as well but eventually went back to sleep until 8am unlike her brother who refused to go back to sleep. He managed all day without a snooze but crashed at 4.30 and woke at 7. Missed dinner and loads of cool stuff. Now got to keep him awake for a bit so that he will have a decent sleep.

Magic Kingdom tomorrow and lunch with Minnie & Friends. Its bloody cold but at least it isnt raining. Wednesday is supposed to be the coldest day.

TYG well done on the toning up.. Dh and i have said that we are going to join a gym on our return as he wants to bulk up a bit and i need to lose the love handles (yes i do have some!)

Scoot did you meet with Pink? How are you?

MrsJB, if you are there, how're things? How is H's face healing up? J's is looking better but still a bit red.

MKG · 18/11/2008 01:16

AM- Janie and Jack is sooooooo expensive. I don't know anyone that can afford to shop there, although their clothes are adorable.

largeginandtonic · 18/11/2008 08:30

Did you meet up Scoot and PJ???? We want to hear all about it. I need to know how long it took you to get there Scoot, i cannot believe i have not met Pink yet >

AM glad the holiday is going well, they do crash at the oddst times when they are all out of sync, i remember taking mine back to the hotel room for snoozes in between fun stuff. The children i had a character breakkie thingy, it was fanatastic! We got to meet loads of them and oh it was just fab I am soooo of you all there. I am a huge Disney fan.

Also farcking hell that site is amazing! They ship here too!!! I have never seen so many gorgeous clothes, it is all old fashioned i am stunned! You never find anything like that here. We have Rachel Riley who i adore but would need to become a millionaire to shop there regularly. The boys have lots of these smoked rompers They wear them with tights too

Pinkjenny · 18/11/2008 09:56

No, sadly Scoot didn't make it, M wasn't well, and she was feeling a bit rotten herself. And I had to eat the whole carrot cake myself.

I am not going to enter that site AM, I cannot control my spending habits at the best of times. I am going to Primark at the weekend to stock up on t-shirts etc for L as she just covers everything in muck, which I then can't get out. So cheap and cheerful will need to be the order of the day for a while.

charleymouse · 18/11/2008 10:09

Morning all still not catching up properly sorry, trying to be good and keep on top of house and busy at work this week. Have a presentation on Friday which I need to prepare for and first aid at work refresher course Wed/Thur. Aaaaagh. Also electrician is coming sometime this am to "finish" ahem the electrics off. AGAIN. To be fair tho DH has asked for 6 extra sockets and I wanted a plug putting in behind dresser area in kitchen area, you don't know what you need until you are living somewhere I don't think.

TYG well done you. woohoo that is brilliant, DH and I are back on the diet, have put 7lbs on since being back at work, have to get in cossy at new year so diet it is.
LG&T are your feet up and legs crossed.
Scoot get a cleaner, and rest up, hang the expense. You are the Duchess of Devonshire dontchya know. Didn't get in the end, pottered at home, let me know when you are going and will come with you; alone
PJ hope you had a good meet, congrats on the job, hope Ls cold is better.
MKG how about Emmaline/Ammeline (sp?)Ooh two lovely dinners to shop prepare clean up after eat
SOH sorry your photo shoot went pear shaped. Did you manage a BF one in the end or not?
AM very jealous of your hols, begining to wish DH would fly. So many places I would love to go to and can't afford the luxury of Orient Express.
Anneme hello, how are you, welcome back?
Hi Elkie how are you and the bubba?
Jam are you resting as well, sorry about the vom fest, not good.
Pebble tssk blardy school, well done for not losing your temper.
TMAM thanks for doing the SS, hope you are back online soon.
AL how are the kids can you keep them in check with threats of no santa yet?

Hello everyone else, hope you are all well.

PS
Has anyone heard form Lupins since her crisis posts? Hope she is well.

Pinkjenny · 18/11/2008 10:11

If one more bloody person on this site tells me that controlled crying is cruel, I am going to throw this computer through the godforsaken window.

charleymouse · 18/11/2008 10:12

No PJ do not throw it you might pull a muscle or something.

Pinkjenny · 18/11/2008 10:14

Ha ha. Grrrr. I need some sleep, L needs some sleep. Nothing works. What else am I supposed to do? Watch Mr. Tumble at 3am every night to avoid a tantruming child who wants what she wants?

As you can see, I've had 4 hours sleep. And she's not ill, or in pain, she just wants to come downstairs. There is no method I can possibly use to break this habit that doesn't involve crying!!

charleymouse · 18/11/2008 10:14

PJ step away from the thread.

charleymouse · 18/11/2008 10:16

Not this one obviously. the other one.

Pinkjenny · 18/11/2008 10:16

I am going to argue with this lady. And probably SOH too, when she comes on and tells me that I shouldn't be so mean.

I'm not usually so abrasive! OK, actually I am, I just hide it well on here!

largeginandtonic · 18/11/2008 10:21

Let her cry, short term pain (for you) and long term gain for BOTH of you.

I will hold you hand, it wll all be ok.

CM nice to see you! I am not resting. Have done the usual school run, hoovered and just finished cleaning both bathrooms and the ensuite sinks. I cant bear the mess.

She is still in and am not niggly at all, i have a good feeling about this girl. She is going to behave.

Must eat breakfast am starving. When i return i will save you on the thread PJ, link me please

Pinkjenny · 18/11/2008 10:34

here

I'm so sad. I've tried to 'respond to her needs', which has resulted in watching Mr. Tumble at 3am. Over and over again.

twelveyeargap · 18/11/2008 10:42

I am not a fan of controlled crying either. I think it just extends what could be all over in a couple of nights of "extinction". Tell them what you're going to do; "You need to go to sleep in your cot now and Mummy will be back in the MORNING when it's time to get up." Then close the door and put your fingers in your ears.

But, that's just the mean mummy side of me coming out.

I even do it with O to a point. I go in and settle him a couple of times, but once I know he definitely does not have a burp to do or anything, then he needs to be left to fall asleep, even if he cries a bit. I think it's more unfair to keep letting him fall asleep in my arms, only for him to wake up in his cot and get a fright and start crying. It's swings and roundabouts.

Letting him cry for 10 or 15 minutes and then him having a lovely long sleep is far better, imo, than snatches of sleep here and there over a period of hours, just because I'm determined he won't cry. Plus I end up stressed to bits doing that "tippytoe to the cot with sleeping baby" thing, only to have them wake up and cry 5 minutes later, just as I sit down to dinner.

Tell it like it is and stick to it. L is a blinking genius at playing you, PJ. Won't take her long to work out that controlled crying means "If I cry for longer, Mummy will come back."

Two or three nights of extended crying, while you're feeling "stong" is far easier to deal with than two weeks of controlled crying where your resolve weakens as time goes on.

Just my opinion though. In my house, whatever gets everybody the most sleep in the shortest time possible is what works for us. Just depends on how much you can man up! I find it hard to stick to anything for long...

twelveyeargap · 18/11/2008 10:44

Oh, cross posts there.

"Responding to her needs", is teaching her how to fall asleep alone and stay that way until morning.

She has no need to watch telly, that's for damn sure.

Boundaries, boundaries, boundaries. That's what she needs.

Pinkjenny · 18/11/2008 10:45

Thanks tyg - you are right. Again. I'm sorry to bore you ladies with this same topic. Again.

She definitely is playing me (sorry SOH, but she is ). There are no tears, no extended sobbing once I do whatever it is she wants. I think you may be right tyg, because when I am going in to her, she isn't stopping crying, she is shouting at me, 'go away, go away', because she knows I'm not going to do what she wants me to do. It's horrible. But I'm not sure if I could do 'extinction'. I'm just not sure.

What I do know, is that I am not being a good mother by letting my toddler get out of bed in the middle of the night and watch TV. And some crying will HAVE to be involved to break the cycle.

largeginandtonic · 18/11/2008 10:50

'Responding to her need' arf. Her 'needs' are she is fecking tired and needs to go to sleep. That is it. Her main aims through the day are food, drink, change me and SLEEP.

I am with you TYG. I have been reading Gina Ford sleep as a friend had been jumoing up and down about how great it is (she had her 4th boy almost a year ago) however she has just said in hindsight the stict routine is now killing her, the baby will not deviate from the routine at all. He screams for lunch at 12 and demands bed at 1 even if she is out and about.

I couldnt do it. The other kids would suffer so much.

I have posted PINK.

Pinkjenny · 18/11/2008 10:50

Thanks LG&T.

largeginandtonic · 18/11/2008 10:54

Stop apologising to SOH she doesnt care a jot. She has stayed here a few times now and knows it is not child cruelty to put a child in their own bed, just DIFFERENT to what she does. Anyway Tilda is a fecking genius and sooooo calm and sweet, honestly the girl is so placid. If SOH had a different kind of child next she would probably respond to it differently. They are not all the same.

SOH knows you are doing a fab job, she does not judge. She wouldnt stay with me if she did We are all just doing what we can to get through this lovely stage with babies/toddlers enjoying it as much as possible.

Pinkjenny · 18/11/2008 10:59

It's obviously just a hang up on my part. I admire SOH so much, and the way she parents Tilda.

L is a wonderful, spirited, feisty little bundle of mischief. Placid? Nooooooo.

Can't think why she's highly strung? I mean, I'm so easy going...

largeginandtonic · 18/11/2008 11:02

Yes Beau shares that 'feisty' personality too, it is lovely. Sometimes.

The tantrums have us howling with laughter atm, trouble is he manages to donk his head of any surface available when throwing himslef to the ground. He looks like an ad for Child Line.

ShowOfHands · 18/11/2008 11:03

I'm not going to post then. I've never said anybody is mean.

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