Are your children’s vaccines up to date?

Set a reminder

Please or to access all these features

Post-natal clubs

Join our Postnatal Clubs forum to find parenting advice for newborns.

May 07: The one where SOH gets her tweed clothes and LG&T doesn't get any...

1000 replies

ShowOfHands · 17/10/2008 13:47

New thread...

OP posts:
Are your children’s vaccines up to date?
madeindevon2 · 14/11/2008 10:51

I just hope baby p's mum NEVER gets her hands on her other child born 8 months ago in prison who is currently being fostered. apparently she wants her daughter back....and thinks she will be home for xmas....

MmeJaffaB · 14/11/2008 11:00

Health checks for children could be made mandatory. Here, if we refuse to take our children to the scheduled checks or don't do them by a certain time then they will stop your child benefit. I believe some of the reason is for the protection of children. Now of course neglect and abuse still goes on here but at least children are not easily able to slip the net un noticed. Of course it is then down to the authoritys to act swiftly.

The baby P case was just terrible as are most cases of neglect and abuse but like you say lg&t I think it pulls strings seeing our little ones the same age.

TheGreatScootini · 14/11/2008 11:16

I vcant wathc the baby P stuff either..I think somewhere someone has been negligent ast social services..but I also know how over stretched they are..its just a whole sorry mess..Tell you what though.100'S od old people are being neglected and abused right now, lots die becuase of it.It never makes the papers
Even worse was that witch craft programme on the other night.Did anyone see?Dreadful.

PJ-Remember that things like stress and anxiety are conditions that you will probably always have-they remit and come back..you are doing great to even recognise it.I think what the others said about hiding the threads that freak you out is wise..and if you are really worried about your anxiety then go back to the Dr.(Am aware that this is the pot calling the kettle black as I am a total mess myself.Am home for the weekend but then will def go to the Dr.I woke up this morning and cried because I felt so tired and panicky about everything)Also dont dare to bake anything for Monday.I will bring Go ahead yoghurt break bars (fits in with slimming world and we will scoff those and pretend they are real cakes.Am so looking forward to seeing you..

Did you have the pictures yet SOH?If not just maybe wear jeans and white T shirt if you have one-and if not get a cheap 2 quid one from Tesco-always looks a classic casual look then..

Where is AM going?Have a nice hol love, if you havent gone already.

at the masters premiere.Sigh.You are so glam

Charley-still around over the weekend if you are free..know weekends are family time so dont worry if not Actually I think the copper would look nice.Walls you mean?Or glass?Really anything would look nice in that kitchen though

Gin and Jam..what are you exact due dates please?Sorry you are both getting the BH and the bump pains-pregnancy is such a beautiful time..not long till two more babies though!Is very exciting.Think you are right not to speak to your sister for a while Gin..you dont need anymore stress in your life right now.L is also acting up again..She is going through a lovely slapping phase at the moment.Its getting on my last nerve!

I have a huge bit of work to do that has to be in for Monday so will have to do today but at least after that am off till Wednesday.Dont like my chances today much though with the girls on the rampage.

Dentist went fine.My teeth fine, (if not very even but have learned to live with that by now), girls teeth fine and they let them ride up and down on the chair

DH in library.He says he is in 'the Zone'.Unfortunately hiom being in 'the zone'means he cant pick up after himself apparently ..roll on next Thurs when it will all be over for a while at least..

TheGreatScootini · 14/11/2008 11:18

My terrible spelling and punctuation is a homage to cod BTW.
Or else im just rubbish at typing.Take your pick

ShowOfHands · 14/11/2008 11:20

It may not be exactly the scheme you mean, but Home Start are a wonderful service. My MIL is a social worker and manages one of their local services here in Norfolk. My MIL works with the children who are close to being on the at risk register to try and prevent it escalating to that. A friend of mine who used to be a single, teenage Mum (also grew up in care, abused and on the at risk register herself for some time) goes in and talks to families in the same situation. I've even been in with Tank to help with showing positive ways of interacting with young children and to promote extended breastfeeding. I'm thinking of training to be a breastfeeding peer supporter.

Yesterday I had got myself into a frame of mind where I was calm and relaxed about the haircut and thought I'd just deal with one thing at a time. Hair first. Outfit second. Photos third. There were already indications that events were conspiring against me: M had only had 6 hours sleep the night before and woken up with a streaming cold that was becoming progressively more green as the day continued; a viral rash was creeping across her chest and face; the artwork afforded by a permanent marker she found in the study the night before was still adorning her ears and neck and all manner of scrubbing wasn't helping, in fact was only exacerbating the worsening rash. Still, I got ready to go out hopeful that my hair may still be tamed and one of the photos might come out well. All ready to go, I couldn't find my money or bankcard. In his infinite wisdom, dh had taken my wallet to work with him.

It at this point becomes frighteningly clear that dh doesn't have the sort of workplace where you can just drop in and request to see him. Herein follows a transcript of my conversation with Norwich City Centre Custody Sergeant:

[Woman red-faced and panting, dragging small, snotty child behind her bursts into the custody suite]

Crazy lady: Er... I'm looking for my husband... he... er might be here... or he might be out...

World weary custody sergeant: [picking up relevant form and chewed biro] What's he done?

Crazy lady: Um, no he didn't do anything. He's... er... it's not like that... he's not done anything wrong, it's his job you see.

[small child, perked up by mad dash in cold weather is climbing over the custody desk shouting daddy]

Custody sergeant: [trying to remove small child from pot of biros and paper copy of Norfolk's Most Wanted] Is it something I can help you with? Is your husband here or not?

Crazy lady, still panting and panicking: I don't know where he is, I mean he's usually here I think. It's just, he's taken my money.

[small child is breaking into a cell still shouting daddy]

Custody sergeant: [wiping snot from his desk and removing toddler saliva from his best pen] Was it a large sum of money?

Mad woman with terrible hair which still needs cutting: No, he's not taken it taken it, he's just taken it if you see what I mean

[small child has fed several biros under the door of a cell and is drawing on the floor]

Custody sergeant: [reaching for his "Wives of Criminals : What to Do When He's a Wrong Un" leaflet with a sympathetic smile] Is this a formal complaint?

I eventually managed to expalin through my panic that dh is in fact a policeman and I just wanted my money for a haircut. Said sergeant found this all very amusing and took great delight in broadcasting 'Oi PC MrSOH, your wife's in custody' across the airwaves.

I was about 5 minutes late for my hair appointment, red-faced, apologetic, worried and not in the frame of mind to look at myself in a mirror for an hour. DH had to come to the salon with the money which caused a great stir. With the buzz of hairdryers and chatter it wasn't apparent why a policeman had wandered into a salon, bent down for a word with one of the women there (who is red-faced and incoherent still and to all intents and purposes looks like she may be on the run and hiding out in a hair salon) and then left again just as quickly.

I had bits cut off my hair, the hairdresser talked about wanting to leave his wife and run away to the continent and eat cheese (I kid you not) and I tried my hardest not to look in the mirror/breathe in the coconut stench/drop my cup of tea/cry.

I went to collect my manic child from her grandparents, she's still awake and getting crazier by the minute and I decided to try the shops suggested on here. Peacocks didn't have the lovely dress TSM linked to, Primark was like hell on earth, so busy you couldn't see and most of the stock was strewn on the floor, so I tried TK Maxx. I tried on a 36E bra. Too small. Norks have now reached epic proportions and won't be shoe horned into a cheap bra. No money for a nice bra, time is running out, so I trudge home to iron my favourite homemade skirt and floral top.

It's 4pm, M has been up for 12 hours and is saying 'bed... cuddle... blanket... milk... bed... mummy...bed... sleep... night night...' over and over again. Five minutes from the photo shoot, she passes out.

I get told off because I'm wearing the 'wrong colour'. It's a family shoot and apparently we're supposed to be colour coordinated. I feel awful, frazzled, haven't eaten all day, old crap clothes on, red in the face from the hot studio lights and feel like a naughty school girl. After an hour of photos M is still asleep so I wake her up. She's got a temperature, snot running down her face, she doesn't know where she is, various family members are juming up and down trying to cheer her up (bad move, she needs to be cuddled by mummy and woken gently but they're all pleased to see her and don't realise they're making the situation worse). Try to have photos taken with M, she screams and tries to hide in my shawl. I ask if they can photograph her feeding (to calm her down and because I want a photo of it). ILs all mumble about 'why would I want that as a photo' and all stand and watch while I struggle to get my boobs out with a screaming child, hot lights and hating the camera pointing at me. I realise my tummy hurts. Too late, becomes horribly apparent that af has turned up 3 days early, I hadn't noticed. Run to bathroom with with screaming child. Blood everywhere. Cry quite a bit. Try and sort me and M out. Try for more photos in damp clothes, washed in a tiny sink with no way of drying them. All goes wrong. M doesn't want to know, I've got nothing to stop the bleeding. Give up.

Cry to dh that I want to go home.

Photos will be online in 2 weeks. I don't think I'll view them.

Wasn't the best day.

OP posts:
ShowOfHands · 14/11/2008 11:26

Of course is all nothing in comparison to the Baby P case. Scoot is right though. It's the one that made the papers. The threads on here are to be avoided. I know I'm a pinko liberal, but the itchy pitchforks and cries for capital punishment do nothing to inform an inherent malaise in social care. I understand that the abhorrence causes such a visceral reaction but the baying for blood I see on MN and other sites atm is disheartening.

OP posts:
TheGreatScootini · 14/11/2008 11:31

Oh bless you SOH....>>hands over gingerbread

TheGreatScootini · 14/11/2008 11:37

It may be the case that some social worker was being lazy though.It will all come out in the end.That happens all too often too.But it is a problem because social care in underfunded and under celebrated as a profession.And because of that it sometimes doesnt attract the brightest and best.There are tons of amazing social workers.But equally there are some that you feel like advising to go and work in Tesco if they are as not- bothered as they seem.
The whole system needs to be re thought and some money spent in the right places.And where people are doing a great job they should be aknowledged and where they are not there should be no second and third and tenth chances.Its just too important.

gets off social care soap box>shudders to think what might be going on in her services as she types

ShowOfHands · 14/11/2008 11:41

Scoot, you're right. Social care is struggling, underfunded, poorly structured and ill-supported. You must see it too often, the struggle to provide in difficult circumstances. You know all to well that you can't split yourself enough ways.

Good, natural pictures? We'll see...

OP posts:
ShowOfHands · 14/11/2008 11:43

Venture's the devil's work. This was at least a local snapper. We think we might go back just the three of us.

ILs aren't that bad. Just very different to me. Loud, demonstrative, hyper, outspoken. In some situations it's brilliant. BIL2 and FIL are wonderful in particular. Very like dh.

OP posts:
MKG · 14/11/2008 12:31

Good morning all.

SOH- I really feel for your saga.Getting photos done with children is not fun. They are good for the first year, then it isn't fun anymore because they cry, talk, walk away and generally don't cooperate until they are older.

LG&T--Glad you are still pregnant.

I'm over the virus, but unfortunately have just woken up with a cold. Welcome to winter!!

I am currently trying to mentally prepare myself for Thanksgiving and the mental anguish that is Christmas. I just want them both to be over.

Pinkjenny · 14/11/2008 13:01

Oh SOH. And I thought toothgate was bad. L also has a cold of manic proportions.

TheGreatScootini · 14/11/2008 13:13

Is Thanksgiving this weekend MKG?Have always thought that two major feasts so close together must be a bit of a mare..are you busy doing odd things with sqaushes and candy0ing yams? (How do you candy a yam anyway?)

MKG · 14/11/2008 13:18

Thanksgiving is on the 28th this year. But still organizing it with inlaws is a nightmare. I'm at the point where I would rather just tell them to come to my house and I'll cook for 30 people, because they are idiots.

It sucks having Christmas 4 weeks after Thanksgiving. It's so stressful. Oh well in a few weeks time it will all be over.

Thanksgiving is my favorite though. All the good food, with no gift obligation. Perfect.

I hate candied yams, so never bother to learn to cook them. I prefer them baked with some butter and garlic powder.

twelveyeargap · 14/11/2008 15:16

SOH, I don't know what to say. I hope you are putting your feet up today with some gingerbread and vast vats of tea.

ShowOfHands · 14/11/2008 15:45

DH working till 5am tomorrow so am on my own. Tild poorly. I think I'm getting her cold and have period pains from hell.

Still, QI's on tonight.

Wish you all lived a bit nearer.

OP posts:
Pinkjenny · 14/11/2008 15:46

I do too SOH. We could bundle our poorly babies together and drink copious amounts of tea and eat gingerbread men.

L's cold is bloody awful. How's Tild doing today?

largeginandtonic · 14/11/2008 15:55

Blardy hell SOH what on earth happened to that little outing! It always amazes me how the simple things in life can truly wreck an entire weeks worth of planning.

Were the family any help at all? I would hole myself up with tea and biscuits for a few days till i had recovered.

MKG 30 people!!! Is that normal? Will that be Xmas too? No wonder it is so stressful. Do you make a few dishes each and take them to one base house? Nightmare.

I am not reading any nore about that baby, it is too upsetting. The tears will fall Scoot you are so right about the abuse elderly people recieve, my mum is a care worker. The ones that go in to their homes and clean/bath/shop/dress etc... she is mainly mental health now. It is scary how awful their own families are to them

She does tell me some hillarious tales sometimes though, real pants on your head stories and hidding the money in the toaster stuff

I am taking it easy, sort of. Blardy Cod has linked to a game. I am going to share so it may drive you all in sane too

here is the blighter

ShowOfHands · 14/11/2008 16:18

When they moved my Grandma from her house in Derbyshire to nearer my parents in Norfolk they found £9,000 under the floorboards/behind the immersion/under the mattress. Doesn't trust banks my Grandma. Still does it now, we have to keep checking her hidey holes.

Tild's bunged up. She's trying to sleep and breathe through her nose. The noise is incredible. She'll cough again in a minute and wake herself up. Black rings under her eyes. She's tired as anything. Not keen on food either. Bfing lots but struggling with that too. It'll pass. She does wipe her own nose though so I don't have to chase her with tissues as have done previously. She's on my lap, nodding.

Can't play that game, no mouse on the laptop. You should try the God Tower. I also like point and click escape the room type games. Infuriating but good fun.

Move here Pink. Still ing at your news.

OP posts:
Pinkjenny · 14/11/2008 16:19

Same here SOH. T'is the time of year. And I am trying not to panic that my friend's baby is in hospital with broncholitis (sp?). See, not panicking.

ShowOfHands · 14/11/2008 16:24

Crimson room is a good escape the room type game.

The God Tower, riddle/mystery type game that's maddening.

The Asylum is a psychiatric hospital for abused cuddly toys. Your job to fix them. Very cute.

OP posts:
ShowOfHands · 14/11/2008 16:31

Bronchiolitis is a bugger like any virus. Tildy's had it twice. Their immune systems can fight it. Bit of help with steam/cot tilting/decongestant. Sometimes babies need a wee bit of help with oxygen but most children don't struggle with it.

How is dd Pink? Any reason to think she's not managing?

OP posts:
largeginandtonic · 14/11/2008 17:32

Bronchiolitis scares the living day lights out of me. Older babies are fine with it though. It makes me nervous having a tiny baby in the virus 'season'. The girl will be BF and kept away from sniffly strangers at all costs, siblings excused of course.

Not more games!!! Noooooo.

I am supposed to be out tonight, pamper evening. Am broke and withonly a handful of hours sleep last night not sure i'm up to it. Poo to it all.

Still tis the weekend! No school run or lunchboxes tomorrow

God my life is sad.

twelveyeargap · 14/11/2008 21:49

Sorry Tild is ill. Thanks for the Home Start info. I think that may be the very one I was on about - I was just under the impression it was council-run. If I was going to do something, I prefer to give practical help. (Note earlier comment about finding neediness annoying). I couldn't be a counsellor or anything, but would be very happy to get stuck in with hands on stuff. I see you get matched up with families you can be of use to. I may have to wait until at least A is in nursery, otherwise having them both minded for an extra few hours a week would make volunteering pretty expensive. (Not sure how much use you can be with two under-twos in tow.) Will contact them and see if there's anything I can do in the mean time.

Pebblemum · 14/11/2008 23:16

Evening everyone

AM Hope you have a lovely holiday

Sorry to hear some of you and the LO's have been ill. Hope everyone is soon feeling better.

I had a great day yesterday. All week Ive stayed in but yesterday Dh had to start work early so I got him to drop me at the shops so I could enjoy a nice quiet look round (Alana was asleep in the buggy) while the boys were at school. Managed to buy a few Christmas presents but hadnt yet managed to buy the food we desperately needed when Jordan's school called to say he had fallen over and hurt his left arm, the same one he fractured last month and that it was swelling up so they felt it needed to be looked at. Cue frantic phoning around trying to arrange lifts and someone to collect and look after Ethan, all the time thinking I knew I should have stayed at home. After sitting in A&E for almost 4hrs we came home still unsure if any damage had been done, they couldnt tell if the fracture on the X-ray was a new one or if it was still the original. They have given him a wrist support and we have to go to the fracture clinic at 9.20am Monday to get it checked out again. He had a school trip today, to watch a horrible histories stage production so I sent him to school, he really wanted to see it and I wasnt going to waste the £15 it cost by not sending him. I sent a letter in with him explaining what had happened at the hospital and that he had an appointment for Monday, at 10am I had a phone call to say he had been allowed on the trip but could I collect him at 1.30 as they didnt think it was safe for him to be at school After all that trouble last week with them labelling him a truant for having time off last time he fractured his arm they then tell me he cant go to school again. Bloody hypocrites (sp?)

In respect to their lovely letter I tried discussing it with them but got nowhere so before I lost my temper I walked away and have decided to write letters to both the school and the EWO explaining everything and demanding to know WTF they think they are doing. I expect I will have another letter next week moaning about him missing school yesterday and today lol. Another gripe Ive had to sort out with the school is J's PE teacher made him play basketball Wednesday even though the doctor at the fracture clinic said all contact sports or any other activity that could damage his wrist was to be avoided for 6wks after having the plaster removed (the 6wks isnt up until Dec 2nd) I was not impressed when I found out.

Anyway on a lighter note, well sort of, everything is fine with baby although I have low iron levels so am waiting results from a blood test to see if I need to take anything for it. Im really hoping it turns out to be ok as I had low iron with J and had to endure having blood taken every anti-natal visit until he was born, and I had needles Ive been getting strong BH's and sometimes it feels as if the little blighter is trying to force his way out through my rib cage. Im finding his movements to be quite uncomfortable at times, Ive still got just over 9wks left so god knows how i will be feeling by the time he gets here. Im also suffering with sciatica and leg cramps again, oh the joys of pregnancy, Id forgotten all about them lol. I do know im absolutely bricking it everytime I think of the labour. Silly I know, Ive done it 3 times already but with Alana the pain was horrendous and I barely got through it. I cant have G&A (makes me want to throw up lol) and normally by the time I get to hospital its too late for anything else. Any suggestions???

E has gone to my SIL's for the night, its been sooo quiet although Alana decided to be a bit of a bugger earlier so she made up for his absence lol. Hes been waiting all week to go and made a big deal of saying goodbye to all his friends, Im sure hes planning on staying there longer than one night Im going to make the most of his absence in the morning and go to ToysRUs to stock up on Ben10 toys ready for Christmas.

Please create an account

To comment on this thread you need to create a Mumsnet account.

This thread is not accepting new messages.