'January 08 shiny new - year babies , Keep rolling , rolling , rolling !'

[lilyloo]

hope everyone finds it

simpson

def see CAB and have lots of questions written down to ask them.
all the benefits stuff will be a pain, but just keep filling out the forms and jumping through their hoops!
some mortgages have a kind of insurance thing when if the payer can't pay temporarily for some reason they suspend payments/reduce them - worth contacting company/reading paperwork.
get everything written down - from docs, CAB, insurance, anyone you speak to re advice & plans - for your own benefit (if you're like me and forget everything when you walk out the door!) and for the future if you need to prove something.
i'm so sad for you, the dcs and dh. glad your mum can help out for now, let the dcs think you're on holiday?
keep coming on here as much as needed to vent, cry, etc.

think all spiders in car gone now, dh 'removed' one more yesterday morning and no new webs have appeared - yuk & shudder, ewwwww.
ds2 loved being in his new seat and ds1 loved it even more - thought it was v funny

didn't feed ds2 last night, just resettled him (3 times tho!) so hoping he will get the message again, nervous about messing with his feeding after his temporary strike but he seems fine feeding during the day again.

ds1 off to nursery later, i've got lots to do if i can put my mind to it....
best feed ds2, back later.

Simpson, so sorry you're having to deal with all this, and hope the dcs are ok. I know the life insurance/critical illness cover we have alongside our mortgage has benefits for sickness, and ensures the mortgage will be paid, and I think most mortgage lenders insist you have sometihng similar.

Lucky, glad DH has come around

Filly, there are some meals that T totally refuses and will only have yoghurt and fruit, so that's what I give her. As long as your los drinking milk, should be fine.

LaT, aaargh teetihng driving us mad here too. Tried the ashton and parsons, which was great, really settled her although she tried to eat the paper. It did result in a massive exploding poo that went all over my bed and trousers though - normal?

JKS - well done on all the resettling, hope it works!

MrsMcJ and Lily - how's it going on the sleep front?

Morning ladies.
Filly George didn't listen. In fact he slept totaly different again last night woke at 3am for a bottle then at 6 for the day .Ah well I have to keep telling myself this is the last baby and he doesn't know what the time is does he?
Had my hair cut short short yesterday. Want to be a ginger again so had alot of the colour cut out. Bit too short though feel a bit naked. But my hairdresser(who I've been going to for about 9 years) said the only way to get rid of the colour is to cut it out. A couple of more good cuts and I'll be back to the original me
Off to Clown Town this afternoon. All the boys love it there.
Dh back to work tommorrow but hes on reduced hours because hes still not allowed to drive so he'll be doing 1-5pm back home for dinner and bath time.
Well I hope you all have a good day. xxx

simpson - oh poor darling

you mentioned dh being taken to hospital, will he be sectioned?

If you are separating ideally you should not be the one leaving the home as you have the children - but you have to do what you have to do and you are quite possibly not able to reason with dh.

tax credits will not be affected by you living with mum as such, it depends on how much she contributes financially to your household, ie does she give you money too. Certainly in the short term I would not worry about it.

At first glance you are entitled to Income Support due to age of dcs. Not sure on top of my head how living with mum will affect it, I think it will not as long as she does not give you too much cash.

Where do you live? I do get paid for sorting paperwork and harrassing authorities, so if you are anywhere within driving distance of warwickshire I will come down if you want.

So sorry to hear of your troubles Simpson.
Wish I had the answers to your questions but I don't I'm sorry. All I would say is that as far fetched as it sounds, I have always found the tax office very helpful when it comes to telling me of things I am entitled to, so they might be worth a call.

Post regulary to let us know how you're doing. Mental illness is so hard to deal with as there is nothing physical to see, so it's hard to have sympathy for it and you never know what the days going to bring or what will set it off. Hugs to you.

Simpson sorry
I think it depends what extra insurance you took out with your mortgage dp not around so can't ask for you. Do you have the paperwork to hand ? Then ring them and ask what you are covered for. This may cover the mortgage payments for you.
Again i think sick pay depends on employer as i know my job with the council pays differently.
Ring his employer and speak to them ?
The doctor may also be able to point you in the right direction.
The benefits office will be able to advise but doubt your mums income would be included at the moment.
Is he staying in the house ?

Please post here for any support you need , we are all good listeners as well as good talkers!

No just as bad here last night but co slept again so don't feel to bad hope she is ok going back in cot when dp back

just got hair cut, finally! only been meaning to go for months, last cut was 1st may - think i like it, much shorter than usual

right, jobs jobs jobs.....

JKS, getting my hair cut and coloured tomorrow. Haven't had it done in months. I have the root re-growth from hell![ blush]
I was due to get it done last week, but school decided to close for the day I had it booked so had to cancel. Arrghhhhh!

Hi all

Things a bit better today. Have spoken DH today, he seems better but does deteriorate as the day goes on...

DH has rung his work and is going to the doctors later today. My mum is taking him. I don't think it is a good idea for me to see him ATM but obviously can't abandon him.

DD at least slept through the night last night which is something and her diet has gone to pot, all she is eating is jarred stuff

We do have some insurance for mortgage re sickness so need to get into the house when he is not there and get paperwork.

My dad drove DS to playgroup today so he has some normality have had to tell staff though incase we are late and that DH can't be allowed to pick him up

Don't know what to do re DS's pre school next week. Do I find one near my mum or wait?? Guess time will tell and just take each day at a time...

Sorry for no personals....

Simpson - I had no idea what pressure you were under. So sorry to hear about your troubles. Mental illness is such a terribly difficult thing to live with and around. SO glad you've got supportive parents. How far is the school? You've probably got enough on your plate ATM than to think of schools? How concerned are you about him going or not? I'm sure it won't hurt for him not to go just yet, especially ATM but really have no clue about this sort of thing. And don't worry about the jarred food FGS! One thing at a time, and I would think that was pretty low down on the list.

MM - how's Nathan today? DH always likes to hear news about him!

Fragolina - I think teething upsets their tummy anyway. Sabela's nappies are certainly a bit unpredicatble ATM.

Lily - When is DP back? How are you today? We didn't have too much trouble getting DD back into the cot although I'm a bit worried about it this time.

JKS - you sound busy . I think we're going to give up bf at night soon.

MrsMc - why shattered? Did I miss something? Is Xavier being s tinker at night?

Betterhalf - hello!

Gingeme - welcome back to the land of gingers!

So! Got so fed up withthe havoc caused to the whole house's sleep by Sabela's failure to do so that I went to my GP this morning. She's a mum and speaks quite good sense and I also wanted to check that it really has been teething thta's been upsetting Sabela so much and it has! Once her teeth have come through, though I think I'm going to follow her sleeping advice which is to try in stages about a week apart: giving her a solid feed when she wakes around 9.30pm; stop bf in the night; controlled crying. I'll stop at any stage which actually works but I think it's time for more drastic measures. The GP was a bit about the solid food afte the official bedtime but she said it had worked with one of her nightmare sleepers and not to tell the HV! Now, I like a GP who says that.

LaT - school is 30mins in car. Could delay his start though. Am sure I could. But what would I do with DS then? He needs to mix with other kids (ok I need the break!!)His playgroup would keep him on I am sure but that is no nearer than the school.

As my mum says, take each day as it comes...

Hi to everyone

Simpson i suppose it depends how long this situation is oing to continue i guess.
Will you eventually move back home with or without dh ? If so i would just delay his start date.
If you thinking of staying at mums long term then maybe contact a couple near her and see what they say. An hour round trip for school is a lot for you and ds!

Simspon So sorry, I had no idea that things had got that bad for you. Stop worrying about non-essential stuff (like dcs diet for a few weeks!) and try not to get distracted by the jetsam...sounds like you have enough on your mind. If your dh normally gets paid sick leave then you should be fine for a few months anyway, assuming the doctor signs him off properly. I don't know what happens when you get to the end of the sick leave period (I think its up to about 6 months full pay) but I imagine that would be when the insurance things kick in - so check with his workplace as it may be you don't need to worry about the rest of it quite yet. So glad you have supportive parents...and please remember we're all here for you as much as we can be!

Gingeme - haircut sounds fab, if a little drastic! Can we have a London gals meet up sometime soon so that I can admire it? Even if its just you and me and JKS I know where Barristermum lives so we could stage a 'sit in' on her doorstep until she opens up and shares Cerys with us!

Ugh. Brain not in gear. DS finished nursery at 3pm today (latest so far)...is now having a 'rest' and chatting away in bed. Play date arriving in 20 mins so actually (unusually), I hope he doesn't fall asleep now, otherwise he'll just be grumpy

Tamara out for the count - she ate most of a Hipp pasta & cheese jar last night , not home cooked but at least it went down. Then no breakfast at all (MM - I tried keeping weetabix and fruit apart, and even tried just fruit, but no joy...) but she did eat almost all her (home made...yay!) fish/veg/pasta mush for lunch. I'm convinced she's teething as she's rubbing away like mad and has a bunch of small spots around her cheeks, but I can't feel anything going on inside her mouth and ds didn't teethe until 14 months ! Anyway, at least she's eating again...for now...!!

Right off to put the kettle on and sort out the laundry before people arrive

Hi Simpson as everyone else said one thing at a time. Deep breath. Glad dh is seeing sense as far as getting in touch with work etc.
Don't worry about jar food. Don't forget it is mad especialy for babys George has a mixture depending on where we are and what we are eating at home.
filly a meet up sounds good. Once DH is back to work and I know his rest days,holidays etc we can arrange something. I can get to where Barristermum lives quickly and easily. It happens to be where Dh's train station is
JKS a hair cut is good for the soul isn't it? I popped into a beauty salon today (not as extravagaent as it sounds) I have wanted to get my legs and ahem other hairy bits waxed forever and the prices aren't nearly as much as I thought they would be. The beautician said I need about two weeks growth on my legs first could I go that long without shaving. DH would think I was becoming a lesbeen what with my mega short hair
Anyway I have been baking Thomas cakes with ds3 and I think theyve cooled enough to ice now.

I wanna meet up too!! Bit closer to me though please?

Maybe we could try to rearrange the midlands meet up as well?

Thanks Guys for all your ideas/help

Have got internet access sorted at my mum's so at least can get on line.

Madmouse - am staying at my mum's in Ealing. Ideally DH would leave our house but there is no where for him to go (unless to hosp or my family) I would not expect anyone to live with him ATM.

We are having a family meeting tomorrow to see what to do.

One option is to send him home to Ireland (his sister would come and get him) The care in mental hospitals seems to be much better there. This is what happened last time.

Another option is possibly for him to move into my brothers flat and my brother move into ours with me and Dcs (would be a squash but doable)

Another option would be for him to move to my mum's or dad's place and me back home with DCs but as mentioned think he would be hard to live with.

Main problem ATM is he is getting agitated when we try and get Dcs stuff out of house. He wouldn't let my dad take any toys for DS today. I don't drive so desperately need the buggy board.

On a positive note have had a great afternoon with Dcs in park. DD went on a swing and loved it Went to £ shop and bought DS some cars so he is happy

Well done you for having a good day with DCs Simpson.

Filly - glad dd seems back on track.

Gingeme - that's what's always put me off waxing.

Sabela is eating again too! Tonight she had two adult teaspoons of soft cheese, a grated tomato, half a 'Plum' pot of lamb and sweet potato and almost a whole pot of Organix rice pudding. Does this sound like quite a big meal to anyone else, or am I kidding myself?

Simpson i am glad you got a chance to smile today.
I am so sorry this must be so difficult for you. I have very little experience of mental illness but it can be very isolating and hard for the partner.
Have you checked out the living with partner with mental illness on here ?
When you say he is agitated is this because you have gone ? Maybe when you know he will be out at an apt get your dad to get your stuff.
Was this a shock or has it been building up ? You said things were tough in Ireland but i had no idea it was so bad. How are the dc's with it all ?
Hope tom goes ok and you get something sorted , thinking of you and dc's.xx

LaT - sounds like quite a big meal to me

DD eat a hipp organic jar for every meal (except breakfast) but its usually half a savoury and half a sweet one. Sometimes has a small fromage frais too.

Lets hope her sleeping is good tonight.She went through last night 6.30pm till 7.30am

Have twigged that if I give her slightly less for tea at 4.30 she will take more milk at 6ish. Doh, talk about obvious and its taken me 2 weeks to work this out

simpson seems your spirit is a bit higher today. Can i say that your family sounds amazing. And so do you, taking care of everyone. Ealing is a bit far for me to come down, but any help I can give with paperwork etc shout you can email me at [email protected]

Susie I don't know how big thse pots are, but it sounds like plentiful to me . Nathan is doing ok with eating, had a good dinner. I cooked cheesy pasta with courgette, carrot, onion and a bit of garlic and he loved it. also finished off some rice pudding and is drinking better and better from the doidy cup. He seems to like hipp jars (eats about half a large one at one meal, and a little bit of something for pudding sometimes) but they all seem to contain so much carrot and tomato that Nathan is permanently slightly orange and he has some mild rashy thing in his neck that I blame on that.

he is really a lot more solid now he is eating solids. A little fat over his ribs even and a bit of a tummy at last. and a double chin

how nice of your dh to still ask about Nathan, I know he did in the beginning too . Nathan is working hard at physio. The current hate thing is having to lie on his left hand side, which he feels unsafe and unhappy about as he cannot use his confident left arm. I am doing it while cuddling him face to face but he still cries a lot, although he has started hitting me with his right hand which counts as progress . Physio due on Friday morning, then on Friday afternoon meeting boss to discuss part time work. Have to take Nathan into Birmingham but admin gals have agreed to play with him during meeting

Hope you all have a good night

simpson- my heart goes out to you. my sister has suffered from manic depression for 17yrs its only in the last 5yrs that she has realised that she can't come of her meds. it is so hard to watch someone go through it, there wasn't much i could do, it makes you feel competely helpless! it sounds like you've got lots of surport make sure you use it!

wow how are you guys getting them to eat so much dd dosen't each much at all 6 mouthfuls if i'm lucky eevn less if its a jar. i've tried all sorts letting her have the spoon ( exteremly messy, poor curtains ), finger food and jars and having food of my plate. nothing seems to work i suppose she will when she's ready but i can't help but fell like i'm failing her as she is on the 9th centile.

so much to catch up on, haven't been on for awhile dd full of cold and teething no sleep.

poltesco Nathan is on the second centile and only just back there after a dive towards the 0.2. He was born on 25th, but has a very small head, is skinny and superactive. They are all different. Nothing wrong with the 9th. Imagine her on the 99th and I bet it would look wrong for her.

Lilyloo - things were tough in Ireland TBH I just thought we weren't getting on and he was being a bit (ok, VERY ) unreasonable about things.

He is in A & E ATM with my mum who bless her has been there with him for 4hrs. He has been given a sedative to help him sleep and got people coming round tomorrow to assess him.

I have posted on that thread thanks Lily!!

He seems agitated about things he can't control ie my mum says he was agitated waiting in hosp. He gets agitated when Ds calls him by his name instead of daddy...If I am in the house he takes it out on me and starts bullying, throwing things around house (including me on 2 occasions )

Madmouse - thanks for that Will email if I need anything definately!!

Cooked some salmon for my dinner and have some left over for DS and will try DD but doubt she will entertsin it, chewing too much like hard work!!

Poltesco - don't even know what centile DD is on any more Very bad bad mummy!!

Sorry to hear about your sister. This is my biggest fear that when he starts to feel better he will stop taking any medication. But will cross that bridge when we come to it...

Bathed DD in sink this evening and put too much water in it so when I put her in (she only just fitted!!) she went mad splashing and it went all over floor and DS who was "helping"

Oops good thing I have spell check as I nearly posted I bathed DD in sick!!

simpson sounds like you had to get out alright, and not just for the children

have uploaded two pics one from hols and one eating weetabix in bumbo. have a look. this proud mummy says he is getting cuter still.