June 2008 - The Olympics are here and Mums deserve gold medals

[ThePenguinProject]

Thought I'd start a new thread before we ran out of space! Couldn't remember the exact name suggestion so have paraphrased, the sentiment is still the same though...

Thanks poppy and agaboo. I think my feelings are compounded by the lack of sleep last night. I've been trying to express but I always end up using it during the day when A is fussing over a feed. Fingers crossed the medication I'm using with him now is improving the feeding today though and so I've managed to express twice. I'm going to start storing some up on the freezer so I can have a break when I need it

agaboo hopefully A will one day suddenly start having a 5 hour stretch like Arco! TBH 3 hours would be heaven

needahand sorry - i didn't realise you weren't moving till next week! Week starting the 14th is fine for me - fungle is that good for you? You never know, the new shops might have opened by then, but I think it's unlikely.

sybil hope you find a solution soon.

allnew i have found DH infuriating at times and do sympathise. Today he left a wet cloth nappy on my breastfeeding chair, meaning I had to wash the cover - and he didn't offer to sort it out. I find the best way to get him to help with stuff is to give him certain chores that are his sole responsibility. I'm a tidyaholic so I find it hard to ignore mess, but I grit my teeth as if I pick up after him he never notices. So he does the dishwasher and cooks dinner and is on duty in case she wakes when I have a shower in the morning and I feed Storm and settle her and change most of her nappies. DH also knows that if I need to dump Storm on him for five mins while I go to the loo he mustn't grumble and if I ask him to change her nappy it's cos I've had enough (esp when she goes through 3 in five mins)! If it's any help, I found things got much better when Storm started sleeping through and I wasn't so sleep deprived - gave me much larger reserves of patience...

allnew sorry - we cross posted. Re expressing, do you try to do a whole feed in one go? I started doing just 2 or 3 oz when I got a moment and found the reserves built up much quicker than if I expressed a whole feed (6/7oz) in one go a day as, like you, I just ended up using it all later.
Also, I don't know if you can bear it given your difficulties, but about a month ago I imposed a ban on myself on feeding Storm EBM until I had a day's worth in the freezer. Although it was tough to not use EBM for a while (about two weeks), it ultimately took the pressure off me as I then knew I could go shopping/ have a drink with a friend if I felt like it. I've only been out a couple of times, but knowing there's no emergency if Storm gets hungry at an odd time is very helpful. I call it my 'cinema fund'!

And yes, you will feel better when A starts sleeping longer.

allnewsounds like its not a surprise that you are a bit short.. I found expressing/not sleeping through a killer

tgf -left a wet nappy? I am no tidy freak (dh threatened to get me sectioned if I nested ) but even I'd be pissed off at that!

thanks greenfairy that's a really good tip re. the expressing. I think I'm resorting to using the EBM too quickly and you're right, it would be great to have such a large supply in the freezer! And at the wet nappy on your chair. I found a used disposable one on the floor this morning which was bad enough

UDC - I've given S cooled boiled water before, when it was really hot and sticky. Seemed to quite like it!

Paro thanks for advice on tummy massage etc. S started baby massage today and we did some of that and he liked it. He also did some great bottom burps today without discomfort which was fab. (What happened to my life - I'm being happy because my son had a good fart ).

Oh I hear S crying and DH not having any luck settling so will try and catch up on all the other posts later!

I find it puzzling that edie won't drink boiled water readily but cannot get enough of her bath water....

Aberdeen - what a nightmare for you with the dummy. That's pretty much why I refuse to let Luke sleep with the dummy right from the off. Have no idea what advice to give I'm afraid other than to sellotape the dummy to the baby's mouth (only joking clearly). Someone would make a mint making a safe dummy stay put device for bedtimes! Dragon's Den here I come. I wonder if you could gently pull it out once he's asleep? I think the action of it falling out is what wakes them so if it's not in there to start with it can't fall out and he's already asleep. Might be worth a try.

Thanks for the comment on Luke - appreciated! He does my head in but I do love him dearly.

PP thanks for helping me out on the South Bank - Luke went mental again on the train home and everyone stared at me and tutted (just like I did before I was a parent so I can't say anything). Still he was so knackered that he was asleep in bed at 6.45.

Paro - what a lovely routine you have. Can you come and put me to bed one night (er..minus the bath clearly )

Allnew - I am with you on the support thing. DP tries but is a bit 'fair weather' and hands him back to me once he's bored of playing with him. I have thought of just buggering off for a day to let him see how hard it is and what I go through each day but I know he'd take Luke to his gran's and let her deal with him.

Poppy - I thought you might come to the london meet today - will you come to next one? Luke likes bath water too - even when he's weed in it!!

UDC we missed you today - look forward to seeing you in Wimbers soon.

OK ladies, you gotta slow down. So many posts! It's like when we were pregnant. Hopefully that means we're all coping better as each day passes.

Libra - Hiya, great to hear from you. Thanks for the redundancy whilst on mat leave info. Unfortunately if it happens, it'll be after my mat leave is over, unless I get preg again v quick! However if your HR dept has any vacancies, let me know!

Whinegums - I won't know anything for a long time yet! Nothing will happen until 2009 at the earliest and even then as I work in HR we'll be the last to be made redundant cos we'll need to deal with all the other redundancies first (turn the lights out when you leave situation). Your situation is sounding really good though, good luck with your meeting! And enjoy your belated birthday meal.

Ernest - bath every day...? I so want to say yes, but it would be dishonest. If we're staying in for the day I don't bother, I leave it for DH to do when he gets home. However that doesn't always happen so it's just a wipe down with baby wipes. BTW I'm referring to Ryder here, not me! I shower every day.

5gomad, Fungle & Paro - Thanks for sharing your bedtime routines, something to aim for...altho maybe not the Rolf Harris songs Paro.

Aberdeenhiker - My only tip would be of the bad Mummy variety of letting him sleep on/with you when he wakes. Then once he has got out of the habit of waking so often you could transfer him back to his cot....but I am sure the others have MUCH better advise.

Glasgow ladies - Ben and Jerrys, yum! Perhaps we should follow their lead London ladies...?

Allnew - I agree with Poppy, I never thought I'd envy DH's commute (on the northern line ). And he gets a lunch hour....! I think they find it very hard to understand that for us it is just so relentless. I sometimes have to make a real effort not to get caught up in "competing" with DH. And remember that he's happy to do anything but needs to be asked. Annoying, but just the way he is.

Amber - Anytime, Luke's so lovely it's breaks my heart when he gets so distressed, so I really sympathise with you. That's a bugger about the train home. I ended up walking home from Wim as the tram looked too busy...glad I did as Ryder started screaming on the mile or so walk home. Bossy PP alert: Go and have a nap now whilst Luke's crashed out.

amber would love to come to next meet up if I can..just let me know when.

para agree your routine sounds great -also use the nice calm songs (decided early on that would be sectioned if had to listen to kids songs) or audio book/radio.. am interested that fleur likes shower as might try that but can see it going down badly (maybe try after I've taken her swimming so she is more used to different types of water).. the thing I cant manage is leave in cot.. she either messes about smiling at me or is spark out so doesnt wake up... am pinning my hopes on tips from ambers nanny here (although suspect that half the battle with leaving to settle is to let them get qutie tired.. I have been stopping any naps post 4ish).

whinegums let us know how it goes on monday.. am going in to see people over next few weeks to discuss what I do when I come back - I am actually quite excited about it now as -I've said before- was pretty p'eed off with work when want on m.leave.Clearly having a baby made me more patient () as actually enthusiastic about going back to something different and throwing myself into it

Thanks, Amber. I was sorry not to make it today as well.

Agaboo, your five-hour comment! I've heard that before and had a similar reaction.

Poppy, bath water!

Allnew, a thought re expressing - if you can bear it, you should find you get a lot at about 2 / 3 / 4 am, and that leaves you time to make some more for the morning marathon as well! Could you possibly express and feed at the same time?

Aberdeen, 2 - 5 am sounds very difficult. Could it be something you're eating for supper or for lunch (= + 12 hours) which comes out at 2 am, and then unsettles him?

Can you believe we have come straight out of jabs and reflux and on to growth spurt? WHEN WILL IT STOP?

Today's feed times so far (I split feeds anyway because of the reflux so each is only one boob rather than two, so admittedly it looks worse than it is; each takes about 10-15 minutes): 7.30, 8.30, 9.30, 10.15, 11.15, 12.30, 1.45, 3.15, 3.45, 4.50, 5.45, 7.15 ...

Wish me luck for tonight!

(The good news is despite the tremendous volume of input, there hasn't been any oral output!)

Evening all, thanks for responses, like i said before, I don't want to moan about lack of personal response, I think it just sometimes gets to a lot of us if we are feeling a bit low anyhow ( with this new baby malarky!), I think sometimes a bit of paranoia sneaks in....lack of sleep dosn't help.
Which brings me onto Amber - your Luke sounds exactly the same as Isla, I can't ever see her sleeping a longish stretch, she has around 4oz at 7pm, then another 4-5oz at 11ish, which she wakes for,I dont wake her. Then again around 2.30 - 3 another 4oz. She is quite a big baby too, roughly 13 1/2 pounds at 9 weeks. I do wonder if it's habit rather than hunger and I don't dare leave her to cry through fear of waking DD and of her waking too much and not going back to sleep. She sleeps in our room and will do until she sleeps through the night as we only have a 2 bed house. Was thinking of moving the cot to the other side of the room next month in an attemp at some distance. I know as soon as we put DD in her own room at 3 months everyone slept better.
School Tomorrow!! Laura, they do have a mamouth settling in period, quite up the wall until mid Oct. Maybe then we can start a daytime routine!?
Paro, couldn't do teaching. Hats off to you!
Sybil, you havn't ignored me, thanks for kind words, I too am normally only online once a day, I know its hard to keep up! Hope DD enjoying school.
Allnew and Whinegums, my raincoat is from Boden, expensive, but I think it will pay off. Its quite hardcore, zip and buttons, nice and roomy for a big jumper underneath.
Needahand - hope the move going ok? I think you and GF should go ahead and plan something, let me know when and where, but with the long settling in period at DD's school, I dont have full days free to give me a chance to get over to Bristol and back for a while. I may be able to get childcare, but will depend when you meet. Unless you guys fancy a day trip to Bath? We'll sort it out soon though, would like to meet up.
Right, need to get the iron out of retirement to iron uniform!
Have a good eve all

Poppy I'm so with you on finding lack of non-baby related adult interaction hard. I really enjoyed studying this week for the first time in about a year (I probably got more done in one sitting for the first time in about a year too ) LOL at Edie drinking her bath water!

Right that's me caught up on reading everyone's posts. Sympathies to those with feeding/sleeping/not sleeping/unhelpful DH's woes.

Am off to check out raincoats at Boden and then cup of tea and cake. Have had lovely day - 1st baby massage class then walk in sunshine - but now knackered!

Sybil At least he fed well from you when offered formula, must have made you feel a bit better. Do you think you will try formula again or just perserve with the best. I had been expressing for a week and just feeding her with bottles and she didn't really bat an eyelid when I gave her the formula, I was a bit as I think formula tastes crap but maybe my bm is even worse, yours must be good stuff. I'm sure things will improve soon.

allnew My dh is the same, I am absolutely exhausted when he gets in (usually about 8pm) and after changing goes off out for a run etc. I know he needs to keep fit and what can I say but running around after a toddler and baby I could do with a bit of adult company when he comes home or god forbid some me time! Dh also hasn't offered to do one feed and now I'm ff he could do it anytime.

UDC what a feeding marathon!

fungle really appreciate all your advice and comments. I hope Mia gains some weight now she's ff at 3 months she is a real titch at 11 and a half pounds.

Evening all

Just back from aerobics, left Dp to do bedtime routine he did a fab job but then she wouldnt settle for him to sleep,so he got a bit stressed out and i had to step in, Bless he gets so upset and worked up

Thanks for kind words bout routine,(expect PP whats wrong with old Rolf !!!) it is a lovely time that i spend with her

Allnew - re sleeping im finding im alright in the am but by pm im dead tired. Ive started taking her to bed with me for an hours kip in the pm on our bed seems to work and she hasnt refused to sleep in cot or alone yet. Will sort it out later if she starts too, at mo i need some sleep

BDQ - youre welcome! but think originally ideas were given to me by TGF and someone else when Fleur was having troubles. Hope they work

Poppy- we listen to ronan's nothinag at all, bryan adams everting i do robbies angels!!!!!Also i put Fleur in when she is just starting to fall asleep, also i find that if Fleur doesnt have a doze or 2 past 4pm she is overtierd by 7 and wont sleep! Past 5pm she dozes in chair in sitting room and i make sure lots of noise so she doesnt go into deep sleep!!

Amber- LOL at putting you to bed!!!

UDC- glad no output and hope 2night goes well

Fungle- that is a big settling time ours just go straight in the first day think its better too mum and child get used to it quicker!!

Waiitng for telepizza to arrive now as bad mummy i am didnt get anything ready for dinner!!!

PAra that sounds quite tasteful.. edie got quite a taste for what is known as "dad rock" round here - went to a mark knopfler concert when pregnant and she went mad kicking.. this has now become something that makes her smile/happy... along with various other type things that make me think I ought to dig out my stonewashed jeans

Hehe! Poppy Dp says its awful cheese she also loves sugababes, pink, red hot chilli peppers and some golden oldies like t rex!!!!

the other day I caught him making her do the air guitar...

UDC good God, woman! D must be 20lb with all that feeding! Great that she's been keeping it down though. And we missed you today and hopefully see you next time. (I still haven't replied to your e-mail - sorry, so rude! - but only because I still don't know when I'll be back.) And Poppy too. Are you on the e-mail list going round? If not, let us know!

Amber sorry you had a tough time on the train. I had a nightmare with settling Iestyn - solid screaming for 1 hour between 7-8, including during a nappy change and during a feed (he didn't shut up when I tried to stuff my nipple in his mouth, but it muffled it a bit!) and then again 9-9.30!! I think he and Luke had a little chat when we weren't watching them.

Fungle new Boden mac, eh? Does this mean {whispers} lost all the baby weight...?

Hi to everyone else. Tired and going to bed; wedding on Saturday and away for a long weekend.

p.s. I'm not going to talk about my expressing habit, due to my monster supply (although it's definitely settling down now). Ironic, really, that I've found something I'm really good at, and it's expressing breastmilk. I mean, I can't get on Britain's Got Talent with that skill, really, can I?

p.p.s.
I mean to post about my 'friend' who wasn't speaking to me and made me depressed when I was pg (mainly because she had issues and couldn't conceive) but she is now pregnant. To cut a long story short, in order to demonstrate my superiority I invited her and her husband to dinner, and they came. My God, she was really arsey about pregnancy and babies! (Not helped by Iestyn's screaming as they arrived, 7pm (see above) which demonstrated that (a) I'm not a very good mother and (b) I can't breastfeed properly - well, he was giving every impression of that!) Totally condescending about washable nappies because she knows more than I do , and, even more annoying, really superior about breastfeeding! I asked 'are you hoping to breastfeed' and she gave me a dirty look, said 'don't be stupid, of course I am'. DH kicked me, becuase he saw that I was about to say 'let's hope it works out for you because it doesn't for everyone'...

Sorry, needed to bitch a bit there. She really was mean to me when I was pregnant.

Wow can't believe how any of us have children starting school. My DS1 starts on Monday (he's nearly 4 1/2) and most definately ready for it however, he will only be going afternoons (from 12.30 until 3pm) until January when he will go full time. I don't remember being eased in gently. Plus it really buggers up my days as I won't be able to go to Unders 1s, Baby Massage etc with an older child in tow as these all occur in the mornings. And DS will have to have his lunch at 11.30 in order to finish it and for me to get him to school on time . I know when I was at work we sometimes had to do spilt lunches and I always hated having to go at 11.30

Hmm lack of personal responses, someone asked a question I replied no acknowledgement

it hurts which is why I was going when I left

Good luck to you all and now I am finally flouncing

Sorry you're finally flouncing Sophie, don't suppose you'll be looking to see this but if it was me then I'm sorry. I have the time to lurk and read posts but by the time it comes to replying I usually forget half of them, doesn't mean that replies aren't appreciated, and we all try our best but with the pressures of RL then we have to be realistic! Good luck with everything.

UDC - I really hope your night was better than your day - you poor thing.

Ernest - how's the brave boy today?

Everyone else - hi, hope you had a good nights sleep.

Went to the spa yesterday for Ethan's 1st swim - see profile for pic - he loved it but of course we couldn't get one of him smiling!! He was looking around as if to say "hey, what are you doing in my bath?"