August 2021 Babies - Running on Caffeine and Baby Smiles

[PurplePansy05]

Welcome to the chattiest post-natal club on MN!

We have welcomed 31 gorgeous new babies together 💖💙 ...

We have filled up several more like a hundred threads in the antenatal birth clubs chat...

...and now we have finally graduated and officially moved to the postnatal birth clubs chat! 🥳

Graduates of the August 2021 (and thereabouts) thread:

@Smurf123 & baby Sophia 💖
@wimbler & her baby boy 💙
@Jessicapebbles & baby Ebony💖
@Inmypjsagain & her baby boy 💙
@PurplePansy05 & baby Leo Alexander 💙
@WinterBabyof89 & baby Rosie 💖
@Winecoffeeteamum & baby Emily 💖
@Ready2020 & baby Rowan 💖
@Magik01 & baby Isaac 💙
@Hoares3 & baby Ellis 💙
@Daffodil21 & baby Elliot James 💙
@sarah13xx & baby Freddie 💙
@MrsB2019x & baby Ella💖
@biscuitcat & baby Rowan 💙
@Whatshouldbemyusername & baby Arya-Nyah 💖
@notinthestarsigns & baby Erin 💖
@Aaaaa1519 & baby Anum 💖
@Angelesque & baby Isaac 💙
@Millymay13 & baby Ethan 💙
@WolfMother326 & baby Alasdair 💙
@BertieBotts & baby Alex 💙
@RandomCatGenerator & baby Solomon 💙
@lucyrp & baby Evelyn Rose 💖
@HopefulB & baby Chloé 💖
@Mmr224 & baby Alasdair 💙
@Smallbean27 & her baby boy 💙
@Fran919 & her baby girl 💖
@Caz1226 & baby Dougie 💙
@Ava50x & her baby boy 💙
@dirtyfries & baby Frankie 💖
@ame88 & baby Lily 💖

Tagging @Dia12, @livingwithbees, @Sheisfee, @Alittlexmasmagic and @LottSE20 in the opening post so you know we're here as and when you wish to rejoin/share your updates 💐

Here we go!

@PurplePansy05 oh it's so tricky when they just want to be on you - really lovely but also a bit much sometimes. I had a really nice day mostly actually, but I think am a bit more tired than I thought - the veg for our stir fry dinner had gone off and Rowan took a little longer than normal to go to sleep this evening and it was just a bit much and I ended up in tears. Bless DH, he was so lovely and we ordered a pizza and had a G&T, now feeling much better! He's away for the next two night for work so I'm staying with my mum which I'm looking forward to.

@Daffodil21 I hope he's feeling better now - it's so easy to do, DS must have had countless clonks to the head! Enjoy your mum having cuddles so you can relax xx

@notinthestarsigns I totally agree about the weather making it harder to do nice things, a nice walk is much less fun in the rain! I know what you mean about pressure to enjoy mat leave - I'd say I am for the most part, but DH isn't working a lot at the moment and that's making it much more fun for me. Having another adult to talk to in the day is really important I think - babies are lovely, but they don't give much back at this stage so it can feel a bit of a slog otherwise.

Girls, I wonder if some of us have started feeling worse because we're now settling into this new life which is very different, as you said, all the excitement and novelty has worn off, less visitors and primarily worse weather. I am very susceptible to seasonal low mood and really need to remember to take my daily vitamin D. I've only just clicked that this, DS's vaccinations, being out of routine with feeding and an annoying DH might be a bit much. Weather is key though, we've not been out enough. I really felt on some days that I might have PND. Still unsure, but I hope I've unpicked why I've been feeling low and maybe it will pass with some easy to make changes.

@notinthestarsigns Hello! I posted on the earlier thread that I find baby classes really awkward. You're not alone. I wonder if most adults do, at least some others must do but pretend they're into it like me. I try but I don't think I'm not feeling the vibe. DS and I had a sing along to some classic tunes and a little disco on my lap tonight. I enjoyed it 100 times more than the classes 😆 but there are some advantages. @lucyrp I'm sorry you felt so anxious I felt very subconscious and anxious too the first three times I went, was panicking too as there's no car park, then my pram got stuck, I ended up late and it was pretty bad. I sat down with him all flustered and felt like crying. Then he started screaming, cue all the mothers of 6 month old happy babies staring at me with a 6 week old at the time 😂 Well, it's suitable from newborn so there you have it! I felt baaad and stressed about even making it there so have a lot of sympathy I am forcing myself to brave it out with him though, signed up to try a different class later this month. The more I di, the easier it will get I think and I need it to be able to think straight! xx

Self-conscious not subconscious, my brain is gone 🤣

Oh @biscuitcat that's so thoughtful of your DH ❤ I'd take that dinner over veg any time! Hope you have a lovely time with your mum xx

@biscuitcat he is thank you - he's back to his usual self. I've had dinner and showered 🎉

Re maternity leave, isn't this one of those things that you look back at and focus on the good parts? The good parts are remembered more by most people, otherwise surely no one in their right mind would have more than one DC 😂 I think I like it sometimes but struggle other times. I'll probably have a different perception in hindsight when I will be going back to photos of tiny DS and our little walks and coffees etc. and I'll be missing it then. Even though my life isn't very flexible because he's so little, it's become flexible due to not having to work fixed hours - I love this part. Really wonder sometimes whether to overhaul everything and start my own business. xx

@PurplePansy05 I'm wondering the same thing and I'm going to give it a go but without too many/any expectations x

@Daffodil21 he is a cutie and you are a superstar! Very impressed!

Sorry to hear about all the partner problems! I can’t really complain about mine as he’s been pretty good, but he’s wfh and is quite flexible so he’s able to help out. When we first moved in together he called me a nag and that he never nagged me- I (politely!) said please don’t ever call me a nag again, I am asking you to do something that I am unable or need assistance to do and you’ve said okay, you haven’t done it and I’m asking you again- it’s not nagging. I said the reason he doesn’t nag me is because he asks me to do something and I do it-
Or if I haven’t and he asks me again I won’t moan he’s asked again, I can still remember his face as he understood it. anyway it’s been 6 years since that conversation and all good! I do get the urgency point though and it’s like Bertie said in the last thread, we’ll ask last minute.

@notinthestarsigns nice to see you posting again! Sorry you’re feeling isolated, I totally understand, I know my husband is around a lot but he’s still locked in the office and when he pops out it’s pretty much always baby related. My friends always talk to me about the baby as well and I want to say im more than the baby!!! I can talk about other things! Despite the rain we go out everyday for a walk, my Apple Watch tells me we walked 32 miles last week and we’re on 13 miles this week already, we go after lunch everyday and that’s a “routine”. I see the nct/peanut girls quite often, did you do any ante natal club? Or have you tried peanut? It’s totally awkward at first but it’s ended up being quite good. It’s also good because they understand if you come out with no make up on or if you’re late for whatever reason. Honestly I find this thread helps a lot, it’s harder to catch up on all the post these days but it’s so nice to have a group all going through the same thing!

I haven’t really thought about enjoying mat leave because I’m so pre occupied… I can’t believe I’ve been off for 3 months already..: I just think this is much better than working but then I found my job stressful and I think baby seems pretty chilled to be honest (everyday I wonder if today’s the day that will change!)

@Inmypjsagain That's seriously impressive, well done. Wish I could take Leo out daily now, alas it's blowing a gale here every day, it's gone pretty cold and as we're so close to the coast, it's been incredibly wet. Welcome to Wales 🙄😂 xx

@Daffodil21 @PurplePansy05 definitely in the starting up a business boat! Don’t want to waste all my maternity leave trying to set something up when I should be enjoying my time with Freddie without distractions but I really don’t want to get to the end of the 10 months, have no choice but to go back to work then hate every second of it. I was considering a soft play business or something tailored more towards babies. There’s been such a baby boom just now and if I saw something advertised that’s ‘good’ for babies to go to I’d be straight there! So I’m sure there is a market for a baby soft play and sensory type stuff, without me actually having to run classes. Buying a franchise for the classes they do local to me is another option but obviously they’re already covering my area so I’d have to teach it further away and I kind of feel that’s part of the reason I don’t want to be a teacher anymore.. I spend my day with young children and it takes any genuine enjoyment out of spending time with my own child (by the time he gets to that age). I love the kids I work with but you do spend most of the time kidding on to be interested in every little thing they’re doing, whereas with your own child you don’t have to pretend (most of the time anyway I’d imagine) 😂 I just can’t face coming in from work not being able to listen to another child’s story then having to play with my own child and not fully be ‘in it’ if you get me 🙈 I see videos even on vlogs of people going nice places with their children for days out etc and I just think that looks great but I’d still feel like I was at my work 🤦🏼‍♀️ So something that doesn’t involve actual teaching or participation from me would be ideal! It’s just the money that’s the small issue 🙈

@sarah13xx Some really interesting points in your post. I'm ashamed to say I never considered what it must feel like for teachers. I can see now why you'd like a change. You have an extra benefit of school holidays and school hours now I suppose, but all teachers I know say they have to work extra a lot and itsa bit of a myth. Are you finding it as well? xx

@PurplePansy05 the main thing that’s kept me going until now is it’s a decent enough wage and good holidays. I teach infants so it’s not so much marking jotters etc that they’ll have to do at nights in the older classes but it’s extremely full on during the hours of 9-3 and I used to have to lie in a dark room for an hour when I came home 😂 There’s a lot of planning involved and excessive paperwork that’s of no use to anyone. I feel like I’m a terrible way the pandemic actually made me last two years a lot easier because the school year was interrupted and in the first lockdown my school really didn’t ask us to do much at all. In the second one they’d got round to setting up live lessons etc for us so we did more then but I feel like I would have struggled to have got to this point had I had to do my normal day to day job all that time 🙈 Then as soon as I was pregnant my mind was onto that and maternity leave, I was just counting down the days. I literally went back to work after last summer, came home with a splitting sore head every night the first week and suggested to DH that we have a baby so I can have a year off 😂 There’s just no physical way I could do it for the rest of my working life so it’s just a case of when will I do something else rather than if 🙄

Todag is going to be fun. Fell asleep on the sofa for maybe an hour or so last night and then came to bed and watched some tv and haven't been able to get to sleep since. Also been waiting for madam to wake up and feed as my boobs weren't letting me sleep either as she'd slept for a total of 4 hours 40😅 she's now feeding thank god so maybe il get a couple of hours sleep before I have to take OH to work at 7🥴

!DD just slept from 7pm to 2.30 am! I really wish she would have given us warning I'd like to say I slept when she did but I did not. She fell asleep on me at 7 and OH was out until 9pm so we transferred her to the bassinet down stairs. I got to sleep after 10 then woke up at 12.30 with leaky boobs and spent the next 2 hours wondering where she was as OH usually brings her up at 1sm.

We've moved the snuz pod a couple of feet away from the bed today in the hope we'll both sleep better. I can still see her but the side will need to stay up now as she's not next to the bed.

Vaccinations tomorrow!

Sorry to hear some of you are struggling with your DHs. I think a few of you hit the nail on the head- men don’t understand the urgency because when they need help they will ask in advance, whereas we ask for it when we need it there and then.

@sarah13xx the comment about him going to work and you only having be baby is out of order. One day when he is off I would literally give him the baby and go out for the entire day. Then come home and see if he would have preferred to go to work! My DH knows that I’ve got the much harder job looking after the kids, maybe that’s a way to get him to realise too? I wouldn’t be treading on eggshells either. Like @wimbler my DH openly admits he doesn’t really enjoy the first 6 months/year which I understand. You don’t really get a lot from a baby other than the odd smile, and the lack of sleep is difficult for everyone, but he needs to realise that he’s just a baby and he needs to get his temper under control and be a little more patient. He will need it when you have a toddler 😂

@Daffodil21 blimey that was one day you had! Your a superwoman doing all that with a baby! Hope he’s okay now and you’ve managed to get a bit of rest also.

We went to CBeebies land yesterday for my DS1 3rd birthday and it actually went well. Was slightly nervous about a day outing with a toddler and 8 week old but it was fine. I was quite comfortable feeding Isaac is public as well- even had a woman come up to me while feeding and say it was lovely to see and that I was doing a great job! Which really made my day actually. One tip for BFing mums I would suggest who don’t have specific BFing tops (I have none), but a vest top underneath the top you are wearing so when you left up one you can pull down the other and there’s no real skin on show. Also handy for when it’s chilly 😂

@PurplePansy05 you know I said to my husband I feel like I’ve run a marathon my legs are so sore, I genuinely didn’t twig all the walking did it! We go for 2/2.5 hours and I enjoy it so much I forgot to check how far we’d actually been.

@Ready2020 ooh long sleep, hopefully this is a start of a trend for her?

@Magik01 happy birthday to your first boy! Glad you managed to have a good time 😊

We’re going to the Cotswolds on Friday for a long weekend. I’ve just started assessing what we need to pack. Might need to hire a trailer to accommodate 😂 seriously we’re taking literally everything! Anyone have any tips… am I being OTT? We’re taking playmat, bouncer, nest, angelcare bath thing, travel cot, the Tommy tippee machine (!), loads of clothes (spit up issues), about 10000 muslins, 3 towels, blankets….Actually maybe we won’t take the nest and use the pram for daytime naps but I’m really questioning my sanity for booking a trip now. @Daffodil21 how much stuff did you have on the train with you?!

Also, I’m starting my Christmas shopping soon- I have 2 1 year olds to buy for, anyone have any idea what to get them? Would it be easier to just get their parents vouchers? I just don’t know what 1 year olds like!

And @PurplePansy05 I meant to say in my last post that the wet and wind does not sound appealing at all!!

Also those of you talking about your own business, I would love to do something but I’m utterly clueless. I’m just hoping for a lottery win… bound to happen eventually, right 😉

@Inmypjsagain packing light with a baby is impossible 😂 I've always been a heavy packer and baby just gives an excuse to carry on! We went to my mum's for two nights the other week and very nearly couldn't fit everything into my car, and it's a big car! Cotswolds will be lovely I bet - hope the rain holds off for you!

@sarah13xx I can't imagine teaching while pregnant, must be exhausting! I used to teach secondary - I left and now work normal office type hours with only 6 weeks leave a year and it's still fewer hours overall than when I was teaching (though I do miss the holidays... not enough to go back!)

Funny to hear about your DHs not liking the first year of having children so much as my OH keeps saying how he doesn't want her to grow up and wants her to stay tiny 🙈 although he did say he can't wait until she's big enough to throw around 🥴 poor DD😂

@Inmypjsagain I probably wouldn't take the playmat or bouncer and just use a blanket for DC to lie on and take a handful of small toys

Yes I think my DH loves the first year as well. He's always chatting away to DS3 and remarking on what new skills he's noticed etc. It's adorable. He is doing pretty awesome with DS2 as well handling all the toddler madness. I would say I don't know what I'd do without him, I've been a single mum before so I know I'd cope because you just get on, but it's a million times easier with his support.

My DS1 is 13 today! crazy to think I'm the mum of a teenager.

@biscuitcat oh wow, I think sooo many people were teachers but that tells you something about how crap the job is 🙈 I was just kind of ticking along because I knew maternity leave was coming up. I’ve now been ‘working from home’ since May and off since the summer holidays so haven’t seen anyone in work since then but I’m in no rush to even go in and see them, I just don’t miss it one bit 🙈 I either go back until I have another maternity leave (probably aim for 3ish years between babies) then quit after that or I find something else asap but I don’t know what 🤦🏼‍♀️

@Magik01 I know, it’s like he was joking but really it wasn’t a joke 🤔 I dont think he has any concept of how hard it is because I actually quite enjoy it, don’t ever moan about it and he is a relatively easy baby I think but he’s away out to work able to eat lunch in peace etc while I’m lucky if I can grab something by 3pm most days! We’re still not talking, only because I haven’t given in or told him how to apologise for once so itl go on for weeks at this rate 😂

@sarah13xx teacher here too my kids are between ages 4-6. I love it most of the time though I would enjoy it even better if I could teacher without all the never ending paperwork. It's sen also so extra added in from that too.

I thought I had loads of time to sign up to a creche for dd. Where I am they are never fully booked... Normally! The one beside ds school has just emailed to say they don't have availability in the baby room in July. I can't afford to stay off on maternity until the summer. In reality we were thinking of me going back in Jan but definitely Easter if we managed to work out finances (my wage is our main income). Now I don't know what to do. Ill definitely be having to change dd to this creche from end of August as going forward it will be needed for handiness to school and I suppose I didn't really need childcare for July and August anyway but I hate the idea of settling dd somewhere for a few months and then having to change her.

@BertieBotts can I ask a car seat question? Dh and dd were in a car accident today; thankfully not hurt (just shaken) but the impact was fairly big. I know I should replace dds car seat especially since the impact was on her side but the iso fix base for ds car seat was in the car at the time. Is it recommended that it should be replaced too? We’ve spoken to the car insurance company and they need pictures but there’s no visible damage but I’ve read they should still cover the cost of replacement?

@wimbler Yes, replace everything that was in the car. They prob want pictures to prove you do own the items or something like that. If you have any trouble with the insurance, ask the car seat base manufacturer for an attest saying that it needs replacing too.

Glad they are OK! That must have been scary.

@BertieBotts thanks. Checked our cover and they are covered so that’s good. Very scary to get a call from dh as I had to go and collect them. I arrived to 3 sets of flashing blue lights including 2 ambulances. Paramedics gave them the all clear thankfully but dh is very shaken and feels v guilty