December 2007 - Santa's come early for some of us...

[Housemum]

Thought I'd start off the new thread as I've never started one before - congratulations to those of you who are on here now - hope I'll be joing you in the not-too-distant future!

Lizzer - thanks for the pep talk! You weren't at all preachy, the reassurance is needed.
And that poem is lovely!
I intend to keep going with the bfing, and I keep telling myself it WILL get better, just hope it does before next week when DH goes back to work!

ditto bouncingturtle - keep waiting for that magic 'it will get better' phase. DH back to work next week after a lovely 3 and a half weeks off and feeling so nervous.

How will I cope with a new born and toddler?? Am panicing a little, at least I have the trusted Cbeebies.

Anyone else still forget they are not eating for two anymore? Just eaten (without realising!) a whole box of marshmellows while surfing.

Got the Baby Whisperer boo at home, but cant seem to stretch the times in between feeds to more than an 1.5 hrs - mw suggested 2 hrs between feeds but the only way I can make this happen is to take DD2 in the car for a short ride. Am sort of hoping this might just fall into place as DD2 is only about 3 wks

Suey - Freya had colic too at first and it seemed especially bad when i was on AB's for bladder infection - however since I\ve stopped she is far more settled now. We tried the Colosynth (?) granuals at first but they seemed to make her worse - good old Infrcol is now working brilliantly

as for toddler tv - our entire sky+ system is used up with Dora and wpobbleyland!!

Am now using dummy to settle at night with partial success!

Lizzer sounds like your LO is more dilated than Bea, although sonographer didn't actually tell me the measurement last week. She was 6mm at 20 weeks I think. So the ABs may have more relevance in your case. My friend's husband's family had a history of quite major kidney problems so when they saw the dilatation at 20 weeks they knew it was likely to mean quite significant issues and were prepared for her to need surgery etc. BTW she is now 7 years old almost 8 and completely healthy active etc and they just keep an eye out for the UTIs and have periodic checks. After you've had the apptmt if you want to bounce Qs off her I'm sure she'd be happy for me to put you in touch. I have found it very useful and reassuring to be able to talk to her.

Dummies are great! Feel so much better using them since some new research came to light suggesting that they can reduce the risk of cot death.
Trying a bedtime routine, have bathed ds and put him to bed in his Moses basket in our room. So far so good... wonder how longer it will last! Wish me luck!

That poem was lovely, made me feel guilty for tidying though and not pouring every minute into staring at my beautiful baby can't win can we !! Was gonna post summat but have absolutely no idea what, mind gone completely blank!! Blimey, I'm much more tired than I thought, off to bed me thinks. I think I picked up from the baby whisperer tv prog as I managed to notice what she wanted at each cry quite early by observing her body language. This has totally relaxed me and made it feel very natural this mummy-thing. So as I cannot remember what I was gonna post, I'll bid you all good night.

Evening

Lovely poem Lizzer. You sound really positive and upbeat - I'm not down but your posts have lifted me thanks .
Totally agree with the feeding, this time round I thank my stars I've not had the endless list of problems I had with DD (bleeding cracked nipples, poor latch/positioning, thrush, nearly mastitis) which went on for weeks. I realise I could get these things again but I'm lucky the first 2.5 wks have so far been painfree etc. I find it frustrating not knowing if DS has finished a feed, at home he's generally better at going 2-3 hours between feeds but a couple of times a day he'll be on/off boob every 30 mins-1 hr. We were out today and gave him a feed on a bench in shopping centre and he fell deeply asleep then 45 mins later in another shop he woke up screaming and was eating hands and rooting so gave him another feed but he didn't settle at all after it. It's at that point I'm so glad of having DH this week to hand the baby to and he can work his magic but from next wk with a toddler in tow I think I'm going to be finding it hard.

Got DS some lovely outfits in the sales today, poor soul didn't have any clothes as we didn't know the sex and everyone convinced us He was going to be a SHE so all DD's stuff was washed and folded in the drawers!

I think the ABs are working on my wound, it was so so sore today but think that was healing, definiately not as bad now.

Think I should go to bed now, DS finally asleep!

Hello,
So relieved I'm not alone with mixed feelings on bf. Sometimes I love it and feel really good about it and other days `i just feel like a milk machine and get so upset if she's had a really good feed then promptly throws it all back up, it feels like such a waste! My over zealous left boob still not showing any signs of calming down and she really struggles to feed well from it, i feel so lopsided as left boob way bigger than right!
Went to bf support grp today which was great so good to talk to and meet lots of other new mums and to pick up tips.

I keep stressing that we're not in any kind of routine yet (think it's cos my Mum is coming next week and I know she's going to disapprove of our laid back/feed/attend to on demand approach) Kaesha is 4 weeks today, in some ways feels like a life time and in other ways has flown by in the blink of an eye.
She is having a really fussy day today, only wants to sleep leaning on you upright and just moans and frets if we try to put her in the crib.

can't remember who said they feel like they should be supermum already I totally know what you mean, i feel like i should be so capable and together(god knows why, i've never done this before!) but i too am rarely out of my pj's before lunchtime and the washing up/tidying/cleaning/cooking goes untouched because she is my priority and the hours just get sucked away feeding/changing/interacting and before i know it. it's nearly midnght and once again we've failed to get to bed at a reasonable hour!

God sorry for huge ramble but really needed to get this stuff out of my head.

Hope that your LO's give you a good night.

xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

Morning all.
I really hope our bfing confessions have proved to be carthatic - certainly have for me!
Had a good night with Daniel! After we put him to bed he didn't wake up again until about 11:30, fed him and he settled back down. He then woke up every 2-2.5 hours to feed, be winded (plus one nappy change) and again settled right down! He and daddy are currently sound asleep upstairs, and I've been able to get a shower and put some washing on and have breakfast! Hope he keeps this up!
Wish me luck, off to see the PILs today, FIL is a PITA and he may get a bit arsey about me bfing. Dh will hopefully keep him in line if he does. Then we're going to pick dss from his mum's, going to try and make that stop as short as possible as she smokes plus she always heats her house to sauna levels!

Loucee - hope the abs kick in and your wound heals quickly.

Loucee - HOpe you wound feels a bit better today

Mixedmama - Goodluck, see you over here soon

Ethan slept most of yesterday so i had myself prepared for a bad night, but he had his bedtime bottle about 10 and slept through until 3, quick feed and change and was back asleep by 3.30, woke at 7, again quick feed and change and is asleep again
I feel so much better for having a decent sleep the past few nights.

We are going into town today with my dad for a few hours, i need to get Ethan some clothes. We bought him a few outfits when he was born but he's outgrowing them, and the rest of the stuff that he's got is too big. The things we kept from ds1 were from when he was about 6 months so they are no good yet either.

Well ladies, can I just say that if you want to shed the baby weight, just get this tummy bug. Have lost 8lbs since tuesday. Only 7 to go before normal size.

Am trying to get a semi routine going for DS now, following the books and all that. Why does it keep going arse over tit because he can't get himself to sleep. Am breaking all the rules letting him sleep on me. Last night he was tired and trying to sleep from 4.30 until 6.30pm.

poor you wizz! I am happy to be a fattie rather than go through what you have!

Thanks for the advice beanster- the infacol seems to be working and i am massaging her tummy. Also had a curry and i think the mlk may have got her going! Will keep an eye on what i am eating from now on

weather shite so staying in- although i would love to goand buy some cute clothes- been given loads but all 3 months plus

real bummer- can only get underwired nursing bras up to 34H in rigby and peller- anyone found them elsewhere? i am a 32K

hey everybody

phew - glad it wasn't just me who had the why can't I be a supermum already guilt complex!

Today is definitely a better day - have washing machine and dishwasher on, DS fed, clean and fast asleep and have just had baby gap clothes arrive as very belated present.

OK - so I'm still in my pyjamas but a girl can't do everything!

Think it has a lot to do with DS sleeping midnight until 6.30 am with only one grumble during the night which the now trusty dummy sorted out

Wizz - hope you feel better soon

Right - am off to have a quick shower before he wakes up

Have good days everybody!

Sarah, that is very impressive!

don't be too impressed!
He's just woken up
I knew it couldn't last!

I am really not gloating at all but I have opposite problem...Lily seems VERY settled - she sleeps loads very rarely screams other than when her feeding is delayed - is happily content when awake....and am little concerned that there is something wrong - had to wake her up for feed yesterday as my boob was about to explode and even hand expressing a bit off didn't help...am desperate to wake her up now as would like some baby time before she feeds and goes back to sleep....
Now don't get me wrong we have had the odd bad night and day (but not a lot)and she feeds almost constantly on and off in the eve...she is 2 weeks today....and we did have a screaming fit on my first trip out to M+S (other than school run which is 2min walk only)....she is nothing like DD1 and must admit to being paranoid..she failed the hearing test in hospital on day 2 and is due to be repeated on Monday and am little panicked that she is so calm cos she can't actually hear anything though she does seem to startle???
Oh sorry for disjointed ramble suppose should be grateful for this baby as not sure how I would cope alone with a difficult baby....oh and another those with older children are they feeling bit neglected at all ...my DD1 age 6 told me that I only paid attention to Lily and wasn't being kind to her at all

Wizz, i'm with suey on the 'i'd rather be fat' front, poor you i hope the bug has gone now..

Macdoodle, i would try not to worry i'm sure she's fine, i have heard of these 'quiet baby's' before, they do exist, so hopefully you've just got one of them The Buddhist (not that i am one) way of thinking is that the child picks you as its mother so maybe your dd thought she'd zoom into your life and be chilled and happy as other things are so hectic for you right now...

BT, yeah i hope we've let it all out. Cathartic for sure

loucee, thanks for the compliment, i'm not always upbeat but i'm trying

Ambi-LOL, You're so right, we can't win!

amani, eating for 2 here still, the hunger and thirst that comes will b/feeding (or is that just an excuse?!) Been good so far today,porridge for breakkie and sushi for lunch, now trying to avoid biscuit tin but its calling me from the kitchen. I can hear it......

Have a lovely weekend everybody

Amani, I wouldn't worry too much, IME they tend to stretch the time out all by themselves. DD fed every 40 mins to begin with but by 8 weeks was every 3-4 hours-I didn't dothing to change it, she just started going longer. The last couple of days ds seems to be going longer too but I know a growth spurt will soon change all of that!

On the same note, Wizz, I think the books are great as a starting point but don't stress yourself trying to follow them to the letter-at the end of the day you have to do what suits you and your baby. Rory is still very little and I don't think you are doing any harm by letting him sleep on you if thats what he needs for now-he isn't going to forever! Obviously when he gets a bit older you can try to enforce good sleep habits a bit more rigorously but for now it won't spoil him.

So just being nosey, who is following a routine already, who intends to, and who is very firmly in the laissez faire camp?

We seem to have accidentally fallen into a kind of routine-still very much feeding on demand, rocking (well more walking and bouncing!) to sleep but ds will usually go back to sleep after his first morning (ie after 7am-anything earlier is NOT morning in my house!) feed so I then get up, get dd up etc. Feed whenever he wants it during the day (mostly every 3 hours at the moment but 2 days ago was every 1-2!) then he tends to wake at around 6 every evening so I then bath him, sleepsuit on and feed him. He is then usually asleep by 8 so into his crib. DD goes to bed between 7.30-8 so in theory we have the evenings to ourselves-woo hoo! Except I'm so knackered that I'm going to bed by 9 myself! DS will then wake between 10-11 so I'll feed him, change him etc then pass him to dh to settle him to sleep, then whenever he wakes in the night (usually between 1 and 3) I'll do the same but have to settle him myself. That's the killer cos it often takes him 2-3 hours to settle at this time which is why I feel absolutely no guilt at dh having to do the earlier one! He sometimes also wakes at 12 and usually at 6ish but takes less time to settle then and doesn't always wake. That's about as much routine as I can handle really, I find them really hard to follow! It's all what works for you though isn't it, a friend of mine is always horrified at my ish attitude to timings-her dd has fixed times for all meals, naps etc and she follows the routine religiously and both she and her dd are happy and relaxed doing so.

Macdoodle sorry to hear of your concerns, hope all is ok

Macdoodle - my 5 year old is also being difficult (or more than she has ever been before)..I think it is the combination of the new baby starting school again and so is very tired.

BTW I definatly do not have a routine...I don't even have one for me except the 2dds needing dropping and picking up from various schools.

Hello all!
I've popped my baby out. Blimey, what a humungous shock to the system that was. Thank goodness you get a cute baby at the end otherwise what a traumatic experience.
I had a little girl by the way. Had to be induced, screamed like a banshee as i'm sure all women do (?) and it was all over in about 11 hours.
My breasts feel like lumps of concrete at the moment.
I've just had 3 brilliant days in a mother and baby unit, being looked after and shown how to do stuff. If any of you are South West based near Exeter, I cannot reccommend Honiton Mother and Baby unit. Fabulous. Like private health care but on NHS.
Anyway, just wanted to say hi to all. I'll start reading back and see what you've all been up to and will begin posting once again next week.
Love shocked but happy Neuro! X

Ooops sorry i meant: I cannot reccommend the unit enough!

Macdoodle - don't stress over the hearing test - Freya failed on the day she arrived when in the hospital (apparently the majority do - which begs the question why do they bother) but was retested at 2 weeks and it only took 2 mins to pick up all the required activity.

Also, I remember my sister saying her DS2 was far far more chilled that her first - remember they do pick up on whether you're more relaxed etc - I'd just enjoy the peaceful time as no doubt it'll change soon

Actually going out tonight (wee sis baby sitting) and so felt need for new clothes today - just gone for new jeans and posh top but all the same - just haven't had the confidence yet to try them on!!

Hope you all have a jolly weekend and that we all get at least 4 hrs sleep tonight

Neuro congratulations to you.

Fifi We had exactly the same night as you last night with the timing of the feeds. Lois hasn't been awake really today and I start getting nervous that she'll be awake all night. How she can sleep through the noise in this house I will never know!