Septermber 07 poppers.....please meet here!

[dal21]

Hi ladies - cannot see a thread for the sept ladies who have popped. Thought I would start one (hope I havent been totally blind and missed one already set up)

we can share our trials and tribulations of our LO's here!

Hi All

You've been chatty over the last few days - not sure I can remember half that i've read, so just big hugs to all!

Just wanted to say to Chattyhan that you've made my day, your LO sounds just like Toby, down to the 2-3 hours awake during the day. Sometimes I'm a little worried that he likes to sleep so much, but other than when he has reflux when the gaviscon helps a bit, the other screaming I've now learnt is simply because he wants to go back to sleep! Generally he's only just woken from a 4 hour nap, so it took a while to realise that he wanted to sleep again!!!

Can't believe he'll be 8 weeks on Wednesday - still waking 1-2 times a night - no routine in sight. Tried with DD to get her into a routine, but he has to work around her committments, so just has to go with the flow. Consequently is much better than she was at being lifted asleep between carseat and pram and moses basket! But no routine whatsoever forming yet!

So pleased to hear the little Cerys is doing well - big hugs to you PLP.

Can sympathise with the HV stories - my one with DD told me I had PND and I was making my child scream when we went through a period of 8 weeks of daytime screaming during feeding. When I told my current HV this story she just laughed and immediately said it sounded as if DD had reflux, which I had suggested at the time, but had been poo-poed!! [I've had depression in the past and knew that although I was low, I wasn't depressed, so was pretty disheartened by this diagnosis!!] My current HV is fabulous - basically said that she's learnt that mothers know their children best and if they think something is wrong, they are usually right. also it's a free-weighing clinic - ie you weigh your baby and only see the HV if you want to, so none of this lip-sucking oooh not put on enough weight, time for formula etc etc that I had with DD - very refreshing!!

Having said all that, Toby isn't really feeding for very long at the moment, but when I expressed for the first time last week, I produced 3 oz in 5 mins, and then over 5 oz in under 10 mins, so he is obviously getting enough in his short feeds. He also took the bottles of EBM really well, so thankfully I'm not going to have the same problem I had with DD who refused a bottle until she was 9 months old!

Twit - glad you had a good wedding day, despite the ILs! Strange beings ILs - just had mine to stay over for the weekend!

toby waking so better go - xxx

Hi everyone.

PLP, so glad to hear that little Cerys are doing so well. It must be lovely to have her home.

Twit, glad you managed to have a good day in spite of ILs!

To everyone whose LOs have reflux or digestion problems, have you tried giving them thicker formula? We're using Aptamil 'Easy Digest' (requires medium flow teat) which seems to have helped Paul a little bit; he's less sicky, and seems to have fewer pains in his tummy than before. You can just buy it off the shelf, though according to my HV (who'd never heard of it ) there's a similar milk that SMA do, that you can get on prescription.

Very jealous of those of you who have got any sort of routine going. Paul's actually not too bad at night, particularly after his first night feed (which I try to do around 9pm, so I can go straight to bed) - he went a whopping 8 hours the other night, though usually it's more like 5 or 6. However, that depends on keeping him awake during the early evening, which can result in a very crotchety baby. But daytimes have no routine at all. I think part of the difficulty is that he's not very good at going to sleep during the day when he's tired - so he ends up knackered, and falls asleep during his feeds, meaning that he only takes a couple of ounces and then gets hungry two hours later.

Still, the good news is that he seems to have caught up with his weight gain, and is back to his original centile. He's put on 2oz a day for the last few days - I hope he doesn't get too tubby! I think he's about 10lbs now, which is pretty respectable at 7 weeks (from a start of 7lb 7oz).

Hope everyone's having a good Monday. I'm off to book Paul an appointment for his jabs .

I have been using Cow and Gate Comfort which is an easily digestible formula too, Ben has been so much better on it than the ordinary Aptamil we were using before. I can really tell the difference too, I still have a box of the Aptamil so have been giving him the odd bottle during the day, he struggles to settle far more after it

I had him weighed last thursday he had put a whole pound on in one week he is now 5 weeks and weighed 11pound 10 ounces and is on the 91st percentile, he was born on the 75th, I think he is going to be a chubster like his brother was

Morning all, just a quickie before picking up the DTs from nursery.

Purple - great news that Cerys is coming home, she is such a little star.

Twit - glad your day went well despite mental in-laws and sounds like babytwit is doing fab!

kinki - sounds like Liam is getting on well with the osteopath, glad it is helping him feel more comfy, must be a relief. I would be interested to see the link to the swedish pillow thingy - Millie mostly turns her head to the left and it is a bit flatter on that side, but will turn to the other side if I make an interesting noise - she is a nosey parker! Good luck with the potty training if you are trying this week, I gave up so many times because I couldn't be arsed and I think only persevered this time because the girls had trained themselves really realising mum was v.lazy and didn't have any accidents so all I had to do was give them a sticker!

dal - sounds like you are doing well with Ryans routine, hope he continues to be such a good boy. your mum sounds like a superstar - do you hire her out at all

Hi canadianmum - know what you mean about going with the flow this time around - routine was a godsend with the twins getting them a bit fatter and feeding and sleeping together. It is lovely with Millie to let her do her own thing and feed and sleep whenever, though she doesn't have a great deal of choice as she has to fit in with the other two. Its good to hear someone else has a baby that sleeps one day and is wide awake the next - sounds like our girls are keeping us on our toes!

It is great to hear how well all your babies are doing weight wise - must admit I haven't had Millie weighed since the HV did it at 2 weeks but she is looking very porky and has moved up to the next size clothes so will be interested to see what she weighs if they do it at her 8 week check on wednesday.

Not such a quickie post after all - have a good one everybody x

Hi everyone!

Ryan had his first set of jabs last week and aside from being more sleepy than normal the next morning, no side effects, thank goodness. He did scream after having them though, but he settled pretty quickly.

I havent had Ryab weighed since his 6 week check and not really too concerned about getting him weighed also. He is already nearly out of his 1-3 month clothing and into some 3-6 month outfits so I am not too bothered about what a set of scales will tell me.

Thanks all for you reassurances on routine. Sometimes I feel terrible waking him, but for the last 2 nights he has gone to sleep by 7.30 with no battles (3 weeks ago, was fighting us til 10pm) and this morning for the first time he was wide awake at 7.20 as opposed to be woken up by me at 7.30 - so I am beginning to see progress. Fingers crossed the nighttime wakings fall into place too.
I did the second night of wake to sleep at midnight (felt so cruel), but he settled back to sleep straightaway and didnt wake at 1 (but still had a battle at 2 though!)

Hammer - my mum is such a star, have no idea how i would have done this without her! Since DH works such long hours, have found myself spending 3/4 nights at mums at least once a fortnight, but it has kept me sane. The wright stuff last week had a section on PND, and one of the contributory factors they cited once again was lack of support structure. If I didnt have my mum (and also a DH that takes care of dreamfeeds) - I can easily see how this all could have overwhelmed me.

I asked her the other day if I have anymore how much we would need to pay her to give up her job and live with us. She thought I was joking. I think I was semi -serious!

Hope everyone is ok. Thinking of hopey/ plp/ sophus and all others not posting. Hope you are all ok.
xx

Hi all

thanks for thinking of me Dal - not any particular reason for not posting. Have been keeping up with you all.
PLP - Wonderful that Cerys is doing well, i hope she continues to progress.
Linus just had his jabs today and had his check up last week - he is 13lb 9oz now, and is a strong strapping lad. Although he's heavy he's very long (in the 98th for length).
I've been very busy sorting out mum's house and all her things - sometimes i get very sad but most of the time i just have to get on with it all and have my cries when i can. LAst time i had a little cry to myself, Linus took that opportunity to fill his pants so my grief was shortlived!
Our nights are generally okay, he has his last big feed at 7.30 and last night he went until 4am. Some nights he wakes at 1 and then at 6 but hopefully we'll get more of the 4am lot. He goes straight back to sleep after feeding so i am very lucky really as i do manage to stay on top of my sleep.
Have also started using resuable nappies and to anyone considering it i can thoroughly recommend it. Makes such a difference not having all that rubbish to dispose of, or always worrying about buying nappies.
Everyone sounds much brighter these days - it makes such a difference to be past those first 6 weeks of chaos. Although babies being babies i am sure it will all change again and again.
Right off to grab some more food before he wakes - feeding ol' lardy boy takes a lot of fuel on my part.
S
x

hi all, I agree with sophus about the washables, and there's always that slightly smug feeling when I walk past the nappies in the shops.
I'm glad you don't feel too tired on top of everything else.

My mum and s/dad have told me they aren't going to Greece this year for christmas because they want to stay here to help out, but I think the real reason is that she doesn't feel up to it.
I think babytwit is now settled into 8:30 til 5:30-6 nights now, which is great, and he is also on a growth spurt as all he has done is eat eat eat today.

Hammer, that pillow. In reality it just looks like a regular little pillow, but apparently the size, thickness etc has been much researched.
No time to chat. Only to say while talking about routines, I've got to nearly 39yo without a routine - so what hope have I got encouraging my dc to have one.

Hi all, am in awe of those of you using reusable nappies, well done! I have considered it but DH is NOT keen and Anna already gets nappy rash so will keep using disposables for the time being.

Anna has her first jabs on Friday, I am not looking forward to that. I sobbed all the way through it with my boys but hopefully I will be a bit tougher this time.

Went to a fun class today, called Mambo Mummies. There were about 8 women with small babies doing the cha cha cha, it was quite funny. Anna slept through most of it and then I held her for the last bit, she seemed to quite enjoy it . Hopefully it will help me shift a bit of lard.

I might do a post on the BF board, but does anyone have an opinion about when I should introduce a bottle? I want to fully BF for as long as possible but should I be introducing a bottle of EBM soon, rather than waiting until she is bigger ? She is almost 8 weeks.

Hello all,

First of all, thank you so much for all your lovely messages, you have no idea how encouraging they are and how much they mean! A special thank you to Chattyhan and MrsFish for your text messages too.

I can't begin to explain the things I have witnessed this week so I've decided to focus this update on the positive things...

It's amazing what these surgeons can do these days - Cerys's wound is only a couple of inches long and they've taken all the dressings off! Her heart is still swollen which is causing some valves to leak just a little bit but they said that is to be expected and that it'll take a few months for it to go down. The good news is that they can hardly see the holes (VSD's) now which is great! All of the nurses adored Cerys and one lady doctor in particular took a real shine to her and was even emotional when we left - she was very popular on the ward! The procedure involved putting two little clamps on either side of the tube and then snipping it in the middle so it won't ever work again - they let me see some of her x-rays and you can actually see the clamps because they are metal!

She has been a bit unsettled since we got home but that is to be expected less than a week after heart surgery bless her! We can already see the improvements though - her hands and feet don't get cold as easily because her circulation is improved; her breathing is lovely; she feeds much more easily (so now she has loads!) and lastly but more noticeably, she cries much louder and longer because she has more energy!!!! What is lovely is that she has discovered how to smile loads this week - she's soooo scrumptious!

We're going back to Southampton tomorrow to see the nurse to flush out her distal loop (lower bowel that she isn't using because of the bag) and I'm hoping to find out when they'll be looking to do the 'bottom' operation that she was meant to have done this week - it may be that it'll be a while so she can be on top form for it - I'd rather she was properly ready than rush it (plus I don't know if I can cope with another week away so soon). She then has a follow up appointment next Monday and then again in six weeks time.

I don't think it has hit me yet as I haven't had the time to think properly about it. DC's are pleased to have us home and they and DH have been very organised while I was away.

Thank you all again for your love and support - knowing you guys are thinking of us/praying for us, is what got me through this last week.

Haven't had a chance to read through the posts properly but will try to catch up later in the week... I can say that Cerys is the same weight now as when we went into hospital a week ago - starving her wasn't fun before the op and then they limited her feeds afterwards which was hard work to say the least! She is now about 8lbs 4ozs at 10 weeks old - she was only 8lbs at birth!!! At least she's making the most of all the tiny baby clothes.

We've been told to delay her immunisations for four weeks because of the op but as soon as she can have them she will. DD1 had whooping cough despite having the immunisations done which is interesting.

Love to you all!!!

PLP xxx

morning plp! welcome back. things sound absolutely fantastic with little cerys and well done DH and DC's for letting you come home to an organised household. Hugs to you and your whole family.

Am in awe of the ladies using rewashables! have no idea how you do it!

Canadianmum - ryan has been taking dreamfeed via ebm in bottle since he was 5/6 weeks old. I would recommend introducing the bottle sooner rather than later as I have read reports of some babies refusing it if left too long....think you should defo try by about the 12 week mark.

Sophus - good to hear from you. Sorry if I have been a little insensitive. My posts about my mum werent the most considerate considering what you are going through.

Well I am a little exhausted this morning. Did the last wake to sleep and midnight (fingers crossed Ryan doesnt wake at 1 tonight) - but he is now waking at 2am - where it takes til about 2.50 and 3/4 visits to settle him. Then he was up again at 3.30 and I had to stretch him out til 4am before feeding him. Last night I wondered whether it was all worth it, the easier option at this rate is just to feed and settle him at 1. But now I know he doesnt need feeding with that frequency, am determined to persevere and leave the 1am feed as dropped and hope he eventually realises there is nothing worth waking for....may take a few weeks but he has to learn.

Hugs to all, hope everyone else is well.

Put that kettle on dal, you deserve it. Mine's milk, no sugar.

About feeding, I feed Liam when he wants it. I did this with the others and they clicked into their own routines at 2 and 3 mths old where they fed regularly and slept through. I'm nervously hoping Liam will follow suit. Any day now then .....

hurry up kink - its getting cold!

Not wanting to wish the early days away, but one thing I look forward to when this lo is older is having a hot cuppa or hot dinner again!

I think I am a selfish mum. DS goes into his chair and watches me make and subsequently drink my lovely cuppa in the mornings. Dinner - I am with you. Toast is my dinner unless someone is at home with me to hold my grizzly bear.

I am going to keep at the dropped feed and see how things pan out. it may be that I am trying too soon. But I then keep reading/ hearing stories of DC's at 12 months still waking at 1/2am! I would go mad on sleep deprivation if things went on that long!

That's where I'm very lucky dal, I don't need a lot of sleep generally. I get by on just 4 or 5 hours a night, so waking up to feed is no big deal for me. I know I'm really lucky in that respect. I must admit I shudder though when I hear that some kiddies are still waking at night, as you say, at a year old or more. I'm not sure I'd be able to go on that long without a good night's sleep.

Wanna hear something funny? Liam threw up a whole feed down my cleavage this morning. Yukko.

Eurgh! God we love our kids, I dont even blink when ds misses the muslin and gets my tops.

I just want to get to the stage of having a little quality time with DH. At the mo, he walks through the door at 8ish, and takes over. I go to bed by 8.30 (earplugs in) and DH is on duty for dreamfeed - settling/ winding etc and then I am back on by 11. Last few nights have been tough as have been setting alarm for midnight to do wake to sleep, then been up from 2 til 4.30.
Am hoping tonight will be better as am not needing to wake at midnight....but I dream of being able to sit at the table with DH and have a nice dinner without needing (a) mums help and (b) thinking I'll pay for this late night tomorrow.

Maybe my expectations are too high, but all you read about is babies sleeping through from 6 weeks and how I wish!

does anyone else spend whole days [or week ends] just feeling really angry?
I now resent dh [lol] for being able to leave it all when he returns to work.
I then feel guilty about the life the dc's have with me. [not much fun tbh]
And then I feel sad about it.
Then its bedtime and I'm so knackered [not through lack of sleep mind] I feel really ill.
Its all 'I need to do this, do that, do this, do that' all day and I can't moan because, hey I did this to myself. I should go and get a job, not be so lazy etc.

Anyway am being stupid so am off to do something else now, or I'll feel bad about that too.

twit - think something is in the air. out of the blue am having a bad morning.

envy DH masses - he gets to go to work and escape the needy bundle that is our son. he openly admits that he couldn't do what i do.

i couldnt leave DS with a stranger, but i finally have some empathy with those women who openly admit to not enjoying motherhood, leaving their LO's with nannies and going back to work.

this is without a doubt the hardest thing i have been through. think 9 weeks of interrupted sleep is catching up.

when talking to my mum, she was telling me how she didn't understand where i was coming from when i said i want my life back. not in a bad way. when i asked her what she mean't she recounted her days with my brother when he was a baby. he was born in india and she had her whole family around her. she had nothing to do but look after my brother. when he napped during the day, she would sit there fanning him and staring at him. she said she was blissfully happy. when she told me that i truely envied her for having found such contentment through her children. made me wonder why i couldnt find the same level of contentment with ryan? are my expectations too much? have been pondering on it since i got back to london.

am not a happy bunny today, but know it'll pass.

I am in agreement with you both. As much as I love Arben, i would love some days to be able to go back to work and not have to look after him all day. Dh wakes and heads off to work, comes back tired after working, driving all day and theres me saying what a hard, tiring day i ahve had! I then feel guilty
Ihave made a point of now3 doing the food shopping by myelf, i get that 1 1/2hrs to myself, even if it is wondering around tesco's. DH is left holding the baby who usually sleeps the whole time!!
I had a really horrible evening last night. ate dinner and proceeded to throw it straight back up again, spent rest of night feeling very sorry for myself with headache and bad nausea! thankfully DH was around to look after LO so i could go to bed

Morning all!

Dal - i really admire this routine you're doing and i hope you benefit soon. Me! i can't do anything in the middle of the night but feed and get alex back to sleep. Last night we woke at 4 and were back to sleep by 4.30! I know it's not ideal and ds1 was still waking for milk every night until he was 1. He still wakes once every couple of weeks at nearly 3 and asks for milk and i'm afraid he gets his milk and i go back to sleep! Whatever works i suppose! You are not selfish for drinking your tea in peace! And dinner i sympathise, if it was just me i'd probably be eating toast too! We eat with ds1 at 6pm and alex usually screams through it! either protesting from his swing or more often on my lap! A big clap for your DH! My dp has still only changed 4 nappies and done 2 ebm feeds. Alex is 8 weeks and has been having 1 ebm feed a night for 2 weeks! As for quality time even if it's just one night a week try to have some time together And sleeping through from 6 weeks in RL my stats are 1 in 20!

Kinki - puke in the cleavage! i've had that pleasure too!

Canadianmum - introduce the bottle now! I did with alex at 6 weeks and with an avent bottle he just couldn't do it! It took 30 mins for him to take an ounce! So we tried tomee tippee closer to nature and he takes that fine. Perserverence is the key. one friend had real trouble getting her lo to take it and ended up skipping the bottle and going straight to cup at 4 months! I'm giving alex 1 ebm feed a day in the evening so i can have a couple of glasses of wine! or maybe even go out one of these days! A friend does her feed in the afternoon so she has more freedom to go out without having to bf in public.

PLP - yey! No need for the thanks it's nice to hear cerys is doing great. It was interesting to hear all about it and her weight is quite something! I don't know why but i hadn't even thought that she wouldn't be gaining like the rest of them but of course it's only realistic with her body concentrating on getting well! I'm sure she'll continue to go from strength to strength. It'd be nice to squeeze in that lunch date before christmas maybe with a bit of shopping at festival place!? Let me know when you and cerys are up for it

more than once I've left the table with babytwit, letting the others get on with their tea alone .
Dh goes to be mollycoddled all week and just thinking about it gets me going as I know that after work, he goes to his other home and gets looked after while I am still doing this doing that etc til I fall into bed. He has a laugh at work, he phones and tells me about his good/bad day and complains if I tell him I've had a bad day.
Dal, I'm of your mum having that lovely time, it is hard not to feel as if you have missed out somehow on the newborn phase when you feel that you have to get up and get back to normal asap.
and then the ils and the house and school and dc's............................

I'm sorry, I'm just feeling sorry for myself.

ok just missed those posts but i must agree with you!

I think we'd be hardpressed to find anyone who doesn't agree!

I envy DP for having a job, being out of the house all day, being able to pee alone, being able to take a lunch break and not having to do everything putting dc first.
I get angry at him for being selfish but wish i could do anything just for me!
I love being with the dc at least 80% of the time! But look forward to when they can go and visit grandma for the weekend. i even envy my neighbour whose a single mum and her ds goes to visit his dad every other weekend! i regularily treat dp like he's been sat around doing nothing all day when he's actually been working hard! As for his dj job we regularily argue about that because i have to struggle with dinner/bath/bed and no company and then in the morning he won't get up because he rolled in at 3am! he argues he has to work 2 jobs because i'm a sahm so i can't have money and company!

Kelmcd - hope you feel better soon! we've got stinking colds and for the first time since alex was born i'm resenting bf because i want drugs!

twit - you have way more on your plate! i keep telling myself a corner will be turned soon! I envy my mum too for that experience. Have been trying to figure out non stop since that conversation what switch I can flick to find the contentment.

I know I am incredibly blessed and actually - he is a very good baby. so I do feel guilty for feeling this way and expecting so much too soon. I think of the women who struggle to conceive and who would read my posts thinking they would give anything to me in my situation. That soon gives me some sort of reality check!

Chatty - thanks for your lovely words. I hope I see a benefit too, but am equally starting to see the positives of doing what you do. I could feed/ settle within 30 mins too. Oh well - lets see what the weeks bring.

Kelm - glad I am not alone!

ah life could be worse - we may not have fellow mnetters to support us through the highs and lows! do you think we will ever look back at this period and laugh?

lol chattyhan, my friend gets a weekend off every other week too.