August/September 2019 babies - #3

[Stroan]

Just spotted we were about to finish the last thread....

That sounds horrendous @Horehound. So sorry you and Arthur had such a poor time at nursery. Part of me does hope it was just a one off, and that DH and Arthur have a better time today. But if it was that bad a showing from the staff with a parent present, I can't imagine it's much better when it's just them and the kids.

That's what I said to DH @dyra. He isn't pleased about what I described but I understand he wants to try. He actually said we should do all four sessions but I told him just see how his session goes. I mean I felt so sick coming out of mine so if dh isn't happy with his one I think then we are flogging a dead horse.
I'm happier now mum said they would take Arthur for more days and for longer term than planned if need be. If I go part time I'll be taking Arthur to as many clubs as I can so that he is socialised.
Part of me feels like I'm too over protective and maybe I am. My brother said Arthur is a scaredy cat but actually bro isn't very baby friendly (he jumped out from behind his gf and made a loud noise to Arthur causing Arthur to cry quite badly.... thanks bro) and made it seem like it was Arthur being sensitive etc but like our household is fairly quiet. We live in a small village, we just had lockdown after I'd only been to two bookbug sessions and one hour at the village toddler group. So he really isn't used to loud noises or anything. I am quite a sensitive person with a lot of empathy so maybe I do protect him a bit too much but he's my baby!

Oh @Horehound what an awful experience!! My concern would be as Dyra said, if that's what they're like when you're there... I wouldn't let it out you off nursery entirely though - are there any other to look around? Maybe closer to your work rather than closer to home? Mine is genuinely fantastic all of the girls are lovely and DS come out tired but very happy.

Awww bless @Horehound. Alice loves a good game of peekaboo, but if she's not expecting it and startles badly, she'll cry as well. She's also not great with loud noises (drilling, vacuuming etc.). That's just her being a literal baby. It's what they do... She's definitely not a scaredy cat about other things. Silly of your brother to think otherwise.

Maybe Arthur might do better with a more intimate setting with a childminder, if he was that overwhelmed by nursery. He's got years before he goes to school still. It's not as if he can't go to nursery/pre-school at a later date.

Yes I'm now trying to find a childminder as a back up. Got a call from work today so part time has been approved with a 90day trial but it sounded like she was quite relaxed about it being a permanent thing.
Yay happy about that. So now just three days cover I need for him and I'm sure mum would do all three but I did think being in a nursery playgroup type thing would help development and I want him to have friends.

The nursery we picked is in the town we both work and there are a couple more so could deffo try more. But as you say, a smaller child friendly environment may be more beneficial to him.

Tricky!

I get his cake in Friday night, so excited. I'll post a photo when I get it.
In laws come tomorrow for three nights. They haven't seen Arthur since the beginning of January!

Ok so today's hour settling in with my husband went a lot better.
That'll be because there were only 4 littles ones in today and with me there was 11!
It was carnage that I had to deal with and my husband got the nice calm relaxed session haha
Anyway Arthur had a much better time today so I'm going to go along to the 1.5 hour session tomorrow and hope it's quiet. I'm Gona see if they do have certain days quieter than the other and send him in on those days. 11 babies is far too many imo in a small room.

Got my part time request approved Inc a 90 day trial bit I'm happy with that.

Happy Birthdays to tbe babies! Time is flying!!

Oh @Horehound that sounds horrible, I wouldn’t be happy with that either. It’s so difficult to judge childcare but if they are like that with you present then the mind boggles!! . Trust your gut. Are there others you can try?

I am dreading Felicity starting, I delayed my return to work-was going to be 1 September but now it’s late October. I am worried to death about it even though I loved the nursery when we viewed it and a friends child went there so have personal recommendation.
If I can’t stay for settling in I think I’ll cry!

I'm going back 1st sep @Megan2018 so lucky you for extending yours as it's really drawing near! I do have a fair haul of hols I can take plus part time plus they offer 5 hours a week (pro rata) for twelve weeks that I can just have off. So I think as I'll be part time it'll be 3 hours that I can take to go visit Arthur or look after him etc.

All the childminders I reached out to in a panic yesterday, are full. I'm seriously considering becoming one as there's obviously demand for them and also I feel like I'd be quite good and reassuring to new mums leaving me with their babies. Will see maybe I'll get used to my pay being back at work and the perks are very good. Lots to weigh up.
The thing with that nursery is we do know people with their children there and it does have great reviews, hence why we chose it. The girl did say to my DH today that yesterday was an insanely busy day (so I'm not sure it was a good idea making that Arthur's first session )
Will give it a good go and if it's shit again I'll deffo seek out another nursery. Probably the one I went to as a baby!

Hmmm... with DS1 we sent him to a nursery recommended by two sets of friends. Their children were a bit older and it turned out the previous room lead had left. He was never really seemed 100% happy. He did fine after a month but wasn't hugely happy there. I put it down to me being over protective because our friends' children had loved it.
We finally switched him to another nursery when he was 2. I wish we'd done it sooner. He loves it. Never any problems and comes home full of stories. I knew we'd made the right choice when he didn't even wave me off after 3 days of being there. 😂
It's always going to be hard for them to settle especially at this age but if you feel Arthur isn't getting what he needs move him. Recommendations are good but staff changes can make huge differences in the care.

Very true @iano. One friend actually has their child there in the same room and I think she is quite like me so I do trust her. However saying that I will be seeing what happens over the next two days and taking it from there.
I'd never let him be unhappy like that.

This is a life of worry now!

I'm seriously considering becoming one as there's obviously demand for them.

Heh. I said that once upon a time ago during a baby group. The ones around here have ridiculously long waiting lists. However, my house isn't even suitably safe or big enough for our own, never mind other people's that will be paying for the pleasure of being there.

I wanted nursery for Alice anyway. We had a choice of 4. One is on a military base, and miles out of the way. Another (unfortunately the best one) is in the opposite direction of the way DH goes to work, and would be a nightmare for drop off and collection. The third, the earliest they could offer a place is February 2021. So Alice is going to number 4, the worst one.

It's not too bad, the Ofsted rating is Good, but we weren't all that impressed with what we saw when we visited. The little we managed to glean from other parents (most send their kids to childminders or the best nursery) is that they have a real problem with staff retention, and have been known to send kids home due to not enough staff, causing dangerous staff to child ratios. Our initial visit was cancelled on the day for this reason. But we'll see. Worst comes to the worst, we have a place sorted for Alice at the other nursery for February.

Now I've got that off my chest....

I'm glad Arthur's second day was a bit better. Hopefully the first day was a bit anomalous (11 babies!?!) and tomorrow and Friday will be repeats of your husband's experience. Hooray for your part time request being granted. I look forward to seeing Arthur's birthday cake. My mouth is already watering.

@dyra oh that's a shame but hopefully it'll be better in reality.
I was reading that sometimes the ones rated "good" are actually better than "outstanding" because the ratings don't take into consideration the staff however, if they have issues with staff detention that's not great is it. You want the kids to build a rapport and close relationship with them. Shame

I deffo could do it, we have plenty space and forest walks and a playgroup and park all on our doorstep so it is the perfect location.
But do I want to do it...that's the question!

Can't wait for the cake! Layer 1 is raspberry and white choc and layer two is chocolate fudge.

I'm so hungry waiting for it hehe

There’s only 2 childminders in the villages near me, and neither take babies (they only do before and after school and holidays).

There are childminders in the two towns but neither are in the right direction for me for work and none started before 8am so not viable for us. Nursery starts at 7.30.

There’s not many nurseries either, but the one we have picked is lovely, all wooden toys and open ended resources and free flow outside space. They also have forest school and it felt right. It’s been consistently rated Good. But whether I feel the same when Felicity has to go......

If our house was big enough (it’s not) I still wouldn’t be a childminder. I couldn’t earn enough and I’m not that fussed about other people’s children. I know that sounds weird but one of the reasons I put off babies was that I’ve always felt indifferent about them. I adore my baby, but I’m not sure I want to look after others
But if I could be a SAHM I would. But alas not an option.

If we hate nursery the only option is for DH to give up work, but we can’t afford that either now I’m part time.

@Horehound hope tomorrow goes better! I can't imagine how stressful it was in that craziness. We're going to be sending Catherine to the same nursery her big sister goes to, which she has always loved and we're very happy with, and I'm still terrified!
So excited to see the RaaRaa cake though. Sadly our lo is more of a telly tubby girl 🙄 I'm not a fan but she just loves it. Had fun making a paw patrol cake for her big sister last week though!

I'd say today was ok. He did have a couple of cries when I was there but I had distanced myself. One wee boy crawled up to Arthur and sat right beside him with his face very close to Arthur's and it freaked him out a bit. I decided to leave and go get my work laptop all sorted and by the time I was finished it was the end of Arthur's session. When I got there I could see he had been crying but the girl said it wasn't for long and she thought his teeth were hurting him.
Tomorrow is a two hour session which j think my husband will do.
Arthur's Keyworker seems nice but there is another girl there who I just don't find very loving towards the babies. A bit tough wiping faces and stuff. Maybe I am just very sensitive though.

Anyhoo I have also contacted another nursery, the one I went to as a child actually, and will hopefully get a viewing there next week but it certainly sounded like they could accommodate

We would have the room to child mind but I know I couldn't/ wouldn't want to. I'm abit like you describe Megan. Although only since I've had my own baby. I have no desire to be around other children other than my own anymore lol. I'd definitely not be able to child mind other children and E at the same time. My instinct would always always be to go to him and it just wouldn't be fair.

Glad the sessions seem to be going abit better Horehound though good plan for the other nursery for a back up if you're still not totally happy.

I was really worried about his settling in session, especially as I wasn't allowed to stay but he looked so happy when I collected him it's made it all seem much easier to cope with. 2nd of 3 sessions booked in for tomorrow- hopefully he's as happy tomorrow as last week

Hope today's settling in day has gone/is going well @Horehound.

Hope yours is going well too @db92.

Well we went to see a different nursery whilst Arthur was at his session.
Much better feel so I think we are going to move him.
When we went to pick him up he had been crying.
God it's blummin heartbreaking really and on his birthday too!
But he has been spoiled rotten. The in laws are up and haven't seen him since Jan so they've refurbed the rocking horse my husband had as a baby and they made a wooden walker for him too which he is living being carted around in. Plus tonnes of books and money etc

Lucky boy indeed.
I am soooo tired though. Because we are hosting we stayed up late, drank too much and I am feeling it today.couoled with driving 40mjns each way to the nurseries and entertaining I'm just pooped. Having a lay down in bed before I have to drive 50mins to get the cake!

Cake photo!

Ooooh gorgeous cake!

For whatever reason I completely believed today was the 20th.... Happy birthday Arthur! Happy first mummaversary @Horehound. ❤️

When will you be able to move him to the new nursery?

Hehe thanks

From next week. We will take him in on the evening on Monday and then he will have a settling in day every day for the week so he will then start officially the week after. Eeeek

But it is a fantastic place..i was so impressed and made better by the full refurb and outdoor space they have put in.

But still I feel sorry for him. I just want to be with him always. But prob just be two days a week so that's alright isn't it?!

Long time no post!

Happy birthday to all the babies. The year has flown by hasn't it although half of it gone due to covid. Still living in lockdown here at the moment.

Fantastic cake @Horehound. Ra Ra is cool, very catchy song. Don't blame you with switching daycare, you have to trust your gut at the end of the day. Two days sounds perfect for him, he will soon get used to it. Prepare for a knackered baby though!

Nothing really going on with us. Nate been teething. Still only has two. Last week he was shocking with the whinging but we're friends again at the moment, lol.

Aw that's good Nate seems over the worst of whichever tooth is coming in! It's a wee shame for them giving them so much jip! t's crazy how things happen for each baby...Arthur has 7 teeth!
He's taken steps since aug 3rd but not often although I think he's started doing it a little more so I think he will walk in the next month.

Yeh that's right, I just have to trust my gut. When I looked through the window of the baby room at the new nursery which was actually through a toddler room so the care staff couldn't see me, I could actually see her smiling at the babies she was helping to feed. I was so happy seeing that because at the current nursery they didn't seem to help them eat at all and they weren't overly smiley!

What are the covid numbers like with you @Geegrl19 that's a long lockdown. Poor you.

Hey @Geegrl19! That really sucks you're still in lockdown. Almost a month. Has there been any indication when/how it's going to be lifted? Also very glad that you've had no other excitement other than teething woes. I think your June/July was more than exciting enough to last you for the rest of the year.

That's incredibly quick @Horehound! If I wasn't already on the waiting list for the other nursery, it wouldn't be until June at the earliest I could change. From the sound of the new nursery, you're right to trust your gut and move Arthur over. Alice is still on two teeth, but her two front teeth are cutting through together, and it won't be long until they're out. The lateral incisors also seem to be on the move as well. She seems to teethe in pairs. Luckily she's being pretty good about it atm. We had one horrible night a couple of nights ago, but she's slept pretty well since then.

Praying that Birmingham doesn't go into a local lockdown. That would be the vast majority of my family unable to visit for Alice's birthday. In-laws can no longer make it, so we could have just the one aunt coming to her birthday.

Oh that's a wee shame @dyra. Fingers crossed for you there's not local lockdown.

I actually turned down a planning job at the 2 sisters food group factory which is about 25 mins from me. All staff there are in a total lockdown so if I had taken the job we wouldn't have had the party today! So lucky. There's 71 positive cases from that factory alone there. Eek.

Party went well Arthur has not been phased by all the people at all. He's actually been amazing!!

I guess the nursery thing is a bonus of living in Scotland where there's not so many people lol