August/September 2019 Babies (Due in Sept 19)

[IVEgottheDECAF]

Couldnt see a post natal group so have taken it upon myself to start one! Will obviously still keep up on antenatal also until babies have all arrived!

Shall we start a list of arrivals?

IVEgotheDECAF - DC5 - boy - 07/09/19 - 9lb1oz

Those that are BF but also expressing- how much do you need to express for one feed?
I’m going to need to leave DH with bottles eventually so I can ride. How much milk do I need per feed and how long might that take to pump? I have zero leaking although BF going very well so not confident I’ll get much out! Would be leaving her 2-3 times a week for 3 hours from about 8-12 weeks so might find it easier to use a bottle of formula. Still not used a single breast pad and we are day 18

@Megan2018 I express 3 - 4 times a day and what I get varies considerably at each time. I can get 90 - 120 ml off each boob within about 20 minutes first thing in the morning but in the afternoon I might only get 60 ml off each after about 20-30 minutes. To use breast milk exclusively for a bottle feed I would need at least 120 - 150 ml. When expressing I generally get much more, much faster off my left boob - interestingly this is DS's preferred side too.

@Stroan interesting - do you find it has a cumulative effect too or do you notice a difference after one feed? I think I will try it tonight!

@happydays00 thanks that’s useful to know, so potentially I could get enough for one bottle by pumping once a day and could possibly freeze some so always got a couple of bottles worth!i hand.
I’m not sure if I can be bothered to be entirely honest but might give it a try with a cheap pump.
I’m spending so much time feeding as it is I can’t face adding hours of pumping in too!

@Megan2018 I express from one breast when I feed from the other but as you say, you may find just one pump in the morning gives you enough for the time you are away. If I haven't expressed enough and DH is left in charge we just top up with formula, works well for us.

@happydays00 Felicity likes both boobs at every feed so not sure what she’d make of it if I pumped one? Do you still feed off the pumped one?

@megan2018 I don't leak at all until I start feeding on the other side, but I'm getting about 3-4oz in the haaka silicone pump overnight. We give it to Ru as the evening feed but I could stash it in the freezer. I could get more during the day but can't be bothered, it's so much easier through the night. (As long as I don't nod off and let it fall off!)

@happydays00 I think it might have more of a cumulative effect of we gave it for every feed but I don't want to express more.

I loath expressing, Although I get plenty, and have never managed to get a baby to take a bottle so I can't imagine I'll bother this time! I do like the hakaa silicone pump though- it's pretty low tech which suits my half hearted-ness...
@Megan2018 by 12 weeks I've definitely been able to leave babies with their dad for 2-3 hours without starvation. With DD I was doing Pilates classes (so an hour and a half away from her) on my own by about 8 weeks. So you might find you don't actually need much in the way of bottles. With riding can you pick your own time? There might be a time of day which emerges as her least hungry time anyway. I keep thinking of your horse and cat! Are they ok???

I've been totally blindsided by unexpected broodiness! If I'd had a c-section I would honestly have asked to have my tubes tied, but now I can't bear to think of not being pregnant again, or getting rid of newborn stuff as it's outgrown. Wtf?!?!? I had this with the others, but I felt that way during the pregnancy too, and this time I really felt DONE all the way through. And there is no way I could cope with 4. 3 feels dicey enough!

Ah @DustyDoorframes it's the hormones! Remember you are super fertile too

DH is going to have the snip. I suspect that I will be hit by a period of broodiness/mourning before it happens but it's the right decision for us. I'd have been happy with one, over the moon with two, but can't do pregnancy again.

I had my 6 week check at the GP today, he really listened and supported me throughout the pregnancy and I felt a little emotional telling him just how much better I am now. I feel happier and more calm than I have in about 10 years, so night and day from pregnancy.

@Stroan no fear, maritals are not resuming just yet so no chance of an accident!
I'm so glad you are feeling so much better! You had such a beast of a pregnancy!!!!
I'm even feeling nostalgic for the GD. Crazy hormones.

@dustydoorframes the Dr asked me if we had contraception sorted. I managed not to laugh! Maybe when I have 5 minutes without a baby glued to me or when the 3yo isn't pretending to be a baby to get some attention or when the house is clean and I'm a bit bored?

It's funny you say that, the other day I was wondering what my blood sugars were! Madness!

@DustyDoorframes
Horse recovery is slow but positive thank you, back in the field but wound still healing slowly. Much smaller and starting to look good but its a slow burn. I am eternally grateful to friends who stepped in (and the insurance!) but have been back to stable duties this week. Enjoying it but tricky with a newborn in tow!
Cat fortunately recovered quickly, it was likely a virus of some sort.

Riding will be weekend mornings and one evening a week to fit around DH and friends, I’m in no hurry to express but Felicity screams the house down for a feed when I’m gone just under an hour at the moment. So depends how quickly that improves!

Any FTMs here? How are you? This is so much harder than I ever imagined it would be, especially on the emotions! I love my little Lyla so much it absolutely kills me when she's crying, although I know logically it's always because she's either hungry or messy nappy but my irrational brain just always feels like she's hurting. I can't wait till she's a bit older and I can distract her more. We had a long back labour spanning days, we were home one night then back in hospital with jaundice, she had to go under the phototherapy lamp all night which she hated and made me distraught to watch her in there, and she's only 6 days old today! We've tried breastfeeding a few times but went on to formula to help combat the jaundice, and my nipples are really sore from what I imagine was an incorrect latch at the beginning . I feel so guilty sticking with formula now, I've been trying to give her boob sometimes still for comfort.
I have to physically hold tears in all the time . I'm in awe of those of you that have a newborn and toddlers and manage it all. Literal awe.

@maternityleave234 it actually seems like he is happiest to take from me weirdly. He won't take it from dh and I have tried leaving rook or not even being there at all..still won't.

@Struan yes it's a very hard teat. I tried him with a Tommy tippee one which he did drink some from but it's a slow flow and I think he got frustrated.
If he managed to take from medala calma yesterday from me no issue but had refused with husband. Tried again at night and it's an absolute no no. He gets very upset! Also seems like last night he wanted to be on me 24/7.he's not usually like this at all. Was all very stressful. He's just woken so I've fed him boob and know he's fallen back to sleep all happy. I always feel bad if he's had a bad time for a feed.

stroan dusty I had my 6 week check on weds and my GP asked if I was back having sex yet! Errrmm have you not seem the twins plus toddler sitting next to me?!! 😆

Senners it is really hard. I think it's such a shock to the system but it will get easier. And don't worry when everyone says newborns are the easy stage. Not all newborns are easy. I found my DS1 extremely tough and hated the first few months!!

Ah i wonder who will be first from the thread to make a next baby 🤰 With threads i have been on in the past it usually only takes a couple of months Any takers?

I'm feeling very broody and would have another if I could but as ruby was a happy accident and me been 42 and OH nearly 50 There is no chance he would let me it took a long time to get his head around us having ruby but part of me can't help thinking it would be lovely to have a brother or sister to grow up with with us been older. She has 2 older sisters(both old enough to be her mum ) and a 9 year old brother but they don't live with us and my older girls haven't been in touch so far I'm mmmm dying to mention to OH how I feel b it I know what his reaction would be lol x

@Senners you're story is similar to mine. I had a 72 hour labour, started with a view to homebirth and ended up in hospital day to birth.
We were discharged an then readmitted 3 days later as baby lost too much weight and was jaundiced. His levels of jaundice were so high he had to have 2 lamps on him and almost needed a blood transfusion. I didn't hold my tears in! I wailed and wailed especially when I saw him with his mask on for going under the lamp.

I chose to pump milk and top up with formula so he ate 50mls. At hospital when I used their pump I got max 15ml altogether and took about 1.5 hours to get that. When we got home I bought a band pump and on my first go expressed 150ml! Bam my books felt much better! I still had a hare time latching as my books are so big. Even now it's still hard sometimes but now I want to bottle feed occasionally so I can leave him with grandparents but he is refusing it and only wants boob! Honestly nothing is simple! And yes, hormones and emotions all over place. I'm week 6 now and feel better. My mum said to me "no one tells you how hard the first few weeks are". you'll be ok xx

@IVEgottheDECAF we've just upped to 6oz bottles as she was draining the 5oz ones. Usually goes three to three and a half hours in the day and longer overnight. She's getting rounder and rounder.

If we had a bigger house I'd like another, but we just do not have room at all and realistically it's not doable financially. I also hate people carriers. I've got my 6 week check next week but I can't take hormonal contraceptives and the copper coil worries me as I know if it didn't agree with me they wouldn't take it straight out. So that leaves us with condoms. In all honesty though dp still not remotely interested so god knows when we will ever have sex again anyways.

Easter how old is your little one now? BabyDECAF is four weeks tomorrow. I think i might try a 6oz tonight.

@Senners it can feel overwhelming at times and as someone has already said (boodles I think) not all babies are easy. I absolutely hated the newborn stage with my DD, I found it impossibly hard and like crying 24/7. This time round has been completely different.

@IVEgottheDECAF I would gladly have another immediately but only if we could afford a night nanny 😂 I'm feeling incredibly broody and DH also is: we had agreed he would have the snip after this one but now he's saying let's wait and see as he may want a third. I've had a pregnancy with migraines and hypremesis and a pregnancy with polyhydramnios so who knows what would happen in a third pregnancy 🤷‍♀️

I'm tentatively throwing my name in to have another. Always wanted at least two. Though, I'm not sure if we can even afford this one. Not sure if I would cope with a newborn + toddler as well.

Either way, it's going to be well over a year before I think about it. If I have any say about it, I am never being in the third trimester during the height of summer ever again.

4 weeks in now. Hormones are still a sod. Feels like I've had her forever. My Google history is a varied list of how to look after a newborn, newborn ailments and how to diagnose them, and what to expect next. Nothing seems to be coming naturally to me. Looking forward to when it's not just an endless cycle of feeding, changing and napping. Also, me getting to sleep for more than 3 hours at a time.

FTM here @Senners and feeling hormonal constantly. I knew having a baby wasn't going to be a walk in the park but I seriously underestimated just how much I'd struggle with the lack of sleep. I love babyDB more than I can put into words but cannot seem to shake the thoughts that I'm just not doing a very good job.
BabyDB is very colicy, sometimes up every hour during the night and at the moment o fee helpless. I've lost count how many times I've cried this week let alone since he was born.

We tried breastfeeding but latch wasn't good and couldn't bare seeing him get distressed while we spent time trying to fix it before finally caving during the night feeds and giving a bottle. Expressing didn't work either so the best option for us all was formula
Mums of more than one - the feeling useless and crappy will pass right? Please tell me it'll pass!

@db92 yes, it passes. You'll barely even remember it. You just remember the good stuff.

The first weeks are HARD. You are learning what your baby wants and needs, hormones are going mad, no-one is getting enough sleep. It's really not fun. And the guilt. Stupid, irrational mum guilt. (It doesn't go away, you just find new things to feel guilty about!)

I absolutely hated people telling me everything was a phase because that's no comfort when you are in the middle of a crappy one, but it's true. It does get better.

@boodles101 is your GP a man?!

stroan no shes a woman, but relatively young and I'm guessing probably doesnt have children of her own!

Definitely no more babies here! It took me a year to persuade DH for a second one and we ended up with #2 and #3. He pretty much booked himself in for the snip at the 12 week scan!!

I'd love another but ideally with a few years gap so will deffo be having the contraception talk with the gp - is the pill ok with bf? Don't want hormones or anything passing through or affecting supply?

We're having an adult night tonight!! Staying in a hotel with my dm in another room to babysit whilst we go to see Russell Howard - like actual grown ups 😁 I'm going to wear a non nursing bra 😂

I think dh is feeling a little out of the loop as I'm bf, I didn't express for tonight as we had some ready made formula left over but I will deffo do this once a week or so going forward so he can give a bottle and I can nap.

Last night was the first night - 4 weeks in - that I could have cried - ds slept from 10pm til 3am but then was fussing constantly from then. Was getting maybe 20-30 min naps in - worse than actually being awake I think. We've had a really busy week though so hopefully he's just a bit unsettled and we can get back into a better routine next week 😬

Didn't try the bottle again in advance as he has the same make dummy so 🤞 also he never refused it at the beginning.

Can't believe 4.5 weeks have passed so quickly!!