May 2017 #16 Sleep deprivation, mumnesia and first smiles

[crazyzooo]

New thread to celebrate the small things (like first smiles and eating steak with one hand), commiserate over the less fabulous stuff (poonamies, vomit eruptions and wind spring to mind) and someone to talk to at 4am

@Sipperskipper I had a similar thing last week where LO was cluster feeding for ages and then started getting distressed and screaming and a quick bottle of formula shut him up. It only happened the once and I assumed he'd drained my breasts so was getting distressed that he couldn't get enough, quick enough. It's not happened since so I assume my milk production may have stepped up a gear (he's done a 5 hour cluster feed this afternoon/evening without any screaming or need for formula).

@Rustler74 This may sound like a silly question, but how do you know when a breast is empty? I've heard people talking about it and always wondered...

Everyone who mentioned bf and antenatal classes - I couldn't agree more! They made it sound like nose to nipple and everything would be simple. Is it heck! I was in hospital for 3 extra days due to bf problems and would have appreciated more info in the classes about problems people have eg. Mine wanted instant gratification so would do 2 sucks, not get milk, and unattach. I had to hand express into nipple shields so he'd get the instant milk and then keep sucking. I also had to do formula on first night due to him not taking to bf etc. I also had to express and give via a bottle during those 3 days so he'd get some breast milk. The antenatal classes made me feel so alone and like such a failure. A friend of mine had similar issues so now I know how common it is.

@Barnes79 your feeding experience sounds exactly like mine. I tried to continue but he had an 11% weight loss at 3rd day out of hospital and I was told to formula feed or be admitted back into hospital. I wish I could have BF and still be doing it now. I feel guilty everyday but as long as he's happy and growing that's all I care about. More support in hospital would have been nice but they were just so busy. There's an amazing BF support worker at my children's centre who's really tried to help but my boobs just aren't quick enough and now my supply is decreasing fast.

I don't envy those of you in the hot parts of the country, it's still 23 degrees inside here but not as bad as a few weeks ago. The only good thing about this weather is being able to get washing dried. Baby was sick over me, her and my/her bed then 10 minutes later projectile vomited all over her brother's bed. So much washing!

I got no support for breastfeeding in hospital, literally no one even checked I was doing it right. Though there were others on the ward that kept asking for help so I guess you had to be quite vocal to get the support. Getting weighed again on Friday so I'm hoping weight gain will be ok, she's being sick so much. She was above birth weight by day 8 though so fingers crossed. Plus she's on the 98th centile for weight

@Barnes79 you would feel it apparently but I haven't experienced it, and baby would protest, then latch easily to other breast. I'm told it's rare in the first few weeks.

Bouncing and Acorn I had help from about 12 different midwives and assistants in hospital but I guess I was vocal about needing help. They did at times give contradictory advice (one would say I needed a pillow then the next would say I didn't) and one was quite rude and snappish which was not helpful at all. They just wanted me to try everything about 5 times before getting the bf team to see me, and within 5 mins with them I had nipple shields and a LO that bf easily!

Morning all, bit behind what with sleep deprivation, etc! Hope all ok
Thanks for advice couple of days back-we've got less crying and squirming, and he's settling quickly after feeds, but...he's posseting, gulping, coughing and choking which is scaring the living daylights out of me. Often straight after a feed and anything up to an hour after. I was having a cuddle just now after a feed and nappy change. His breath gets caught as he starts to swallow down what must be regurgitation, then coughs and whoops to catch his breath. Starting to get really upset and scared- he seems to keep pausing breathing for a few seconds during these episodes and I have to grab him to prompt it. Also woke to find a little bit of dried blood around his nostril, which I've read is normal but still on top of everything else worries me.
Does this sound like classic reflux too? I'm scared to take my eyes of him today.
Incidentally I have developed stinging nipples, which I understand could be thrush/- has anyone had this and did it affect baby in these ways? Feel quite anxious and lost today, I hate weekends with no GP access...

@mightymouse76 BabyTea did that for a while. It's not dangerous but sounds very dramatic! Is he distressed with it? It settles once the muscle at the top of the stomach matures a bit. You don't need to treat it unless he's losing weight or very upset if it's very acidy. Where are you? There must be OOH GPs if you're worried you can always give them a ring today.

Ugh think we were up every hour last night. So hot! Cross and thirsty baby. I thought being off in the summer would be good!

I'm really impressed with those of you that are breastfeeding despite struggling. We never managed it but I am still expressing a few times a day.

I actually got a lot of breastfeeding support in hospital and he managed to latch on fine but I just wasn't producing any colostrum at all after a big blood loss giving birth and 12 hours after he was born he'd had no wet or dirty nappies so we gave him formula and has been on it ever since. My milk did come in on day 4 but I was still in so much pain I could barely hold him. Formula is working well for us. It can be quite annoying constantly having to sterilise everything and particularly difficult if we are going out for a few hours and not able to have a bottle prepared in advance but I'm happy he is gaining weight and it has really helped dh bond with him as he's been able to be really hands on with looking after him.

Thanks @Rustler74 I did try keeping feeding to one breast at a time overnight.

The weather seems to have affected him too and constantly feeding since half 4 and not settling back to sleep for long without constant grunting and squeling noises!

@teainbed thank you that has reassured me (again!). You're right it is dramatic isn't it? And my sleep deprived state isn't helping- think I slept 10.30-1.45 then 3.45 to 5...feeling ugh. Did baby tea do the choke like swallowing thing too? It wakes him up in distress as he's drifting off (doing it in my arms as I speak). I tip him upright and he looks a bit scared when it's happening, but once he's recaught his breath he drops off again. He's taking years off me today, I tell you!

So hot here too- feeding every hour since 6, with all the added stress above thrown in 
My mental picture of wiling away the summer days in the garden with a placid baby couldn't be further from reality! More like hot, sweaty, tired, worried and stuck in a hot untidy bedroom, constantly feeding!!

@ClaireSunflower Well done for the expressing- I'm still finding that really hard. Re:formula when out, are you able to try the ready mixed stuff? This was what mini m was given when my colostrum and milk was late, and we've stuck with it since when needed despite it being rather expensive, but it's good for emergencies. I admire the bottle feeding prep- we're crap at it here!

@Acorncat Hope you have a less pukey day...!

@Sipperskipper And @Barnes79 Ditto here on feeding pattern. I think my supply is also regulating in the last day or two though, and he has possibly come through a growth spurt/developmental leap (5w4d today) in the last week, as he was crabby and insatiable for 3 days, and now despite scaring me with the above mentioned gulpy weirdness, he's much calmer and seems full after a feed.

How's @CoxsOrangePippin baby cox this morning? Did you manage to keep him comfortable? It was 27 in the room here so mighty was (and still is) in just a nappy.
V sweaty mum though...

@newbieho thank you for asking, first session is tomorrow! They have moved venue and the new one is just round the corner so no excuse not to go now!

@teainbed, sipper, rise, ticky and others re earplugs I don't think it is congested grunting, it's like trying-to-poo or trying-to-latch grunting. Usually he starts it about 15 mins before he wakes but sometimes it goes on for the whole length of his sleep! It is helpful to know I wouldn't be the only one to use earplugs. I used them for a couple of hours last night, I still woke as soon as he cried but I could sleep through the grunting. I do worry about the risks of missing something but then if I don't sleep when he does I'm more at risk of falling asleep with him on the sofa etc so I guess it's about finding a balance. It's tricky.

@barnes79 yes its harder in reality than the very theoretical antenatal class with the doll! The doll doesn't squirm or clamp down or anything like that!

@mightymouse76 his scalp veins have gone back down today so I guess he is cooler! I'm telling myself they've been at 37 degrees for nine months so they should be ok...

@clairesunflower you are a trooper with the expressing. I had a haemorrhage too and the only reason Pippin is bf now is that I had some antenatally expressed colostrum and DH spent several days hunched over the baby syringe-feeding him that while I was a mess.

Been trying to keep up but difficult to write responses as crazy-baby has been attached to my boob for the last 3 days...!! Hopefully it will be one of the "leaps" described in the wonder weeks and will pass!!

@rockyroad17 we have really struggled with nappy rash! Found that washing with water and cotton wool/cloths rather than wipes, trying different brands of nappies and most importantly putting a barrier cream on top of a nappy rash cream (e.g. the white metanium on top of dried yellow metanium cream).

@mightymouse - I am always sooooo hungry!!!

@Barnes79 - yes I am about 9kg heavier than pre baby (bit was very fit and BMI of 18.5) and I wobble!! Actual wobble! And having DP issues too. Yesterday I could tell he was getting grumpy I wasn't helping with the BBQ (I was breast feeding and had been for the last 3 days in constant clusters...).

@vanilla8. How's it going? Crazy baby was slow to gain weight as we were both on antibiotics and I had a major PPH. If youbare happy with your baby, would it be worth calling a lactation consultant for a chat? I found this article useful! themilkmeg.com/im-on-empty-i-need-more-milk-maybe/

@sipperskipper, @rustler74, @Barnes, and anyone else who struggled/struggle with breastfeeding - I think it's all well and good promoting breastfeeding but I feel staff need more knowledge so they can help when It's not straight forward!!

@mightymouse, we were there last week and I was tearing my hair out!! La leche league councillor helped me - I have a really quick let down and oversupply! So for me pulling baby off my boob to catch the jetflow and hand express until it calms down, feeding with the baby in an upright/sitting position and using one boob per feed (several feeds if short/very frequent feeds have helped). Have also tried to keep him upright for at least 10min after each feed and it's much better!

Sorry if I missed anyone out - this post is so long! Good luck keeping the sprouts cool! I am camped out in front of a fan with a baby and 2 cats!!

Fortunately it's not as hot here, sun is shining but there's a good breeze so we were still able to get the bedroom down to 20 oC last night.

Had a very grumpy windy baby last evening properly screamed her head off and we couldn't do anything other than hold her and talk to her. This is what my DH finds hard because he wants to fix whatever is wrong. Infacol is helping but I'm now having to try different positions to burp her, mainly because she's now to big and wriggly but not quite able to hold her head up. So this morning after I've fed her I've laid her flat on her back for a couple of minutes then sat her up... random theory that allowing her to stretch out after being scrunched up helps to release the wind. Also looking at where I sit when I feed her trying to make sure she has enough space to stretch out. I'm not sure if any of this is making a difference but we'll try anything 🤔

Baby Rise is also supposed to be going through her first leap so I'm wondering if that was also making her grumpy 😳

I have a different DH quandary in the speed at which he does things, I'm trying really hard not to nag at him to go faster but he hasn't quite realised yet that with a baby you have very limited windows to do things so he'll try and do irrelevant things when what we should be doing is putting her in the car so we can get out the house 😣

Hot water tip... apparently if you put a bowl of cold water/ice cubes in front of a fan it will blow cold water. Off to try!! (Apologies if I read this on here - my brain is boiling...)

Hello everyone, it's been ages, I've been reading but struggle to post as mainly need both hands to feed as doing breast compressions.

Yes to DH issues!
Yes to bf issues!
Yes to feeling like I can't cope and whole days when I cry loads!
Yes to not being very good at accepting help!
But also yes to having the cutest most delicious baby ever

Anyone else camped out in MIL's hot stuffy spare room bf whilst everyone else is sat in the garden having a lovely Father's Day and eating yummy food??!

@Badgerbird yes! Everyone was enjoying a BBQ and I'm fairly certain nobody except my husband knew I wasn't there. He kept a plate of food for me though!

@Badgerbird Not quite - my DH is outside enjoying the sun whilst I'm inside with LO keeping him cool and/or bf. 😒

@badgerbird yes, was at my parents for a bbq feeding in the bedroom (they have an ac unit - bliss!) and then my dad tripped & impaled his leg on a metal rod. Ended up covered in blood & my dad being whisked off in an ambulance! (He's fine by the way...gross wound though!) We didn't even get to start on the burgers!

skipper what a shame! Hope your dad is ok.

We had my family over for father's day BBQ today and I did indeed spend most of it feeding in front of the fan in the dining room. Baby Bees has barely unlatched all day. My toddler is not reacting well to the heat and is being a right Mardy bum. Looking forward to this heat wave being over.

@mightymouse76 can't remember how many weeks your LO is but BabyTea is 9 weeks now and doing it a lot less.

We've also been feeding constantly today. And not napping until mid afternoon when he fell asleep in the pram on the way home from a fair we went to. I can't understand in this heat why sleeping on a hot person would be preferable to a nice cool cot? 

@CoxsOrangePippin it is very tricky but you sound sensible! The only thing I would add is if there's any hint of illness then I wouldn't use earplugs. You'd wake for a proper cry but the feverish whimpers and wheezes of an unwell baby could be very quiet.

Big hugs @Badgerbird and @Sipperskipper for your dramatic afternoon!

@teainbed that sounds wise, thanks. I'm not sure I'd actually recognise those whimpers and wheezes though, I've never looked after a baby til having my own! This is definitely the project I'm least qualified and trained for in my life so far. For now I'm just checking his temp basically every day because of this heat and his occasional slight diarrhoea. And DH is going on a paediatric first aid course in a couple of weeks.

Thankyou @teainbed, he's 5+4 today, so guessing the next couple of weeks will see some changes.

Nice to have you back @Badgerbird !

@Badgerbird and @Rabbitykins55 that was me yesterday! Stuck in dark lounge feeding for 2 hours whilst our friends ate in garden. I did usual one handed shovel of food into mouth, dropping lots on both of us! I wish I had the balls to just fap a boob out in the back garden, but it might be a bit much for the neighbours as it's a terrace with a bit very private back yard.

On the upside today I did manage a sort of nap, sweating buckets in the spare room whilst having weird anxiety about BF and FF

Worried sick about t this bloody heat- 27 in our bedroom again- Baby very sleepy which you'd normally celebrate, but now I'm just scared in case he gets into trouble...fan arriving tomorrow, thanks argos. How is everyone keeping babies cool? I'm going to run the fan all evening tomorrow before we put him down, and do the ice pack thing near the fan.

@RasperryInAMelon Hope you're feeling a bit better? you know where we are if not

I know @mightymouse76 the heat makes me nervous. We have a fan and it's been on all night with lots of open windows but still too hot here.

Baby W slept 12.30-7 Saturday night which was lovely but also a bit scary at 3+3 so we've woken her up to feed. Yesterday she was very sleepy in the morning but then cluster fed and barely slept from 1ish for about 12 hour! Some combination of heat and leap I think.

I have been just getting my boobs out everywhere really! She ate a lot in a restaurant yesterday and then also in a friend's garden. I'm sure some of our guy friends saw too much nipple when she unlatched but it was too hot to cover myself and somehow despite body anxieties I'm just dealing with it!

@Sipperskipper that sounds very dramatic! Glad all is ok.

@1004Rise yes to speed of DH doing things. And getting distracted by random pointless tasks!

Yuck another horrible night. 25c in our room and not much cooler today. Obviously I know it's not his fault but we were starting to be in a bit better routine with BabyTea at the end of last week and it's just gone to pot this weekend.