May 2017 #16 Sleep deprivation, mumnesia and first smiles

[crazyzooo]

New thread to celebrate the small things (like first smiles and eating steak with one hand), commiserate over the less fabulous stuff (poonamies, vomit eruptions and wind spring to mind) and someone to talk to at 4am

Not sure why there's a picture at the bottom of my last post.... I didn't mean to put it there!
Do I have to report my own post to get it edited?!

Baby W has been awake since about 4pm other than little naps. She's also feeding on and off and quite windy. Don't really know what to do with her! We are at my parents with my sister and her partner and although it's nice being looked after, I can't help thinking that all the people and fussing don't help baby settle.

We finally got discharged by the midwives today at 3 weeks. Baby W gained almost 300g in a week if the scales are right, and is well over birth weight. We asked about her posset and pain after some feeds but they weren't hugely helpful. They suggested talking to a pharmacist about infacol or other options, or waiting to see if it gets better.

@Barnes79 I'm not a huge fan of mine but trying not to think about it (and failing). I can't do much post section and I hate my belly at the moment, but can't see a way to deal with it!

No helpful thoughts on your DH just hugs!

I have had about two hours sleep because baby grunts constantly in his sleep and I am a very very light sleeper, all the more so since he arrived. I am a mess. (it isn't loud grunting, quieter than our cat miaowing and DH sleeps right through it)

Would it be ok for me to sleep with ear plugs in? I'm thinking that would still have the benefits of room sharing? I would still hear him if he actually cried out or anything. But I just can't lie awake for the whole of his three hour sleep between feeds.

Advice?

Cox I have done before as I have the same issue. I was more worried about the danger of me being so exhausted in the day, as like you said he's still in the same room plus husband is there too. Or sometimes at the start we put his basket on my husbands side of the bed when he was really noisy. Worked before husband went back to work as I slept easier when I was the closest (temptation to constantly check on him was removed) but husband did have to pass him to me for feeds.
Have got used to the noise more as the weeks have gone on I think!

cox baby sipper grunts & squirms like mad. Luckily she rarely cries, but she sounds like a warthog being choked! I've been wearing earplugs since day 1. I always wake when she starts grizzling for a feed.

I feel your pain though!

Morning ladies

Last night wasn't good, as it seems that baby nate might be suffering from diarrhoea, as he went through nappy after nappy. Not looking forward to today as will have pooey baby and toddler to look after while dh goes to stag do and will no doubt have a stinking hangover tomorrow for fathers day. Yay!

@Barnes79 I'm not sure how I feel about my post baby body. I now weigh less than before I was pregnant, my tummy has shrunk a good bit and I'm in my normal jeans. Which is all good but my boobs are huge (for me) and I seem to have lost muscle from my legs and arms so there's bits of me that look too skinny compared to what I'm used to. The midwife did remind me that it took 9 months to make a baby so it will take a similar amount of time to recover. I think it's important to give ourselves a break.

My DH is getting better with baby stuff, I think it's just because we've had more practice (and no choice but to do it on our own) and like @Tickyboovicki said to talk to them rather than bottle it up.

@CoxsOrangePippin i have trouble getting to sleep without some noise (usually a radio 4 podcast) so I've been sleeping with just one earphone in in case I couldn't hear her, so maybe if you're concerned start with just one 😊 sleepy mummy is no good for looking after little one.

@CoxsOrangePippin I'd worry I'd miss something with earplugs in. Do you know why he is grunting? A cot wedge has really helped us with possetty grunting. Is the room too warm or is there any other reason (like allergy) for the congestion? I just wonder if finding the cause might be helpful.

@jennymac31 is he poorly? Hope you get a nap before H goes out. Or perhaps he should stay home.

Busy night here too but it was very warm so I think BabyTea was a bit thirstier than usual. It's a shame as we'd had a run of better nights! Oh well.

Teainbed - baby's poos seem to be a bit stringy and mucus-like so think he might have picked up an infection but I'm not sure there is much I can do about it other than keep him fed and hydrated.

Don't really want to stop dh from going out as it's a joint stag do for his 2 younger brothers (who are getting married 2 weeks apart) so all of his brothers will be out.

So baby vanilla is 3 weeks today and still hasn't regained birth weight. We have a tongue tie check appointment for Wednesday but HV wants us to top up feeds with formula this weekend to try get his weight up.
She also wanted us to go GP but I couldn't get a GP appointment and I don't think there is anything wrong with him, he's very alert and pooing and weeing in plenty of nappies.

He doesn't latch straight away and although I keep him on a breast for as long as possible (atleast 30mins) I don't think his sucking is getting the hind milk.

@Barnes79 my DH is the same, always wants me to help!

@vanilla I asked a lactation consultant about foremilk and hindmilk and she told me not to consider them as two separate types of milk. In fact they are trying not to use those terms at all as they aren't really helpful. The amount of fat in the milk increases gradually throughout the feed - there's no distinct difference. So maybe it's just purely latch related?

When LO lost a lot of birthweight I thought the hospital might suggest formula top up but they said this could impact on my supply. I gave expressed top up feeds every 3 hours and that did the job very quickly. If you were up for expressing maybe you could try something that? I don't know how you feel about giving formula - but I was glad to be supported in continuing purely breast milk as ultimately that was what I wanted to do long term.

@Rockyroad17 thanks for that, I have been expressing, and this morning we have given expressed bottle after I fed on breast and have started to express after every feed.
Have ordered some formula for delivery later today, and will top up the feeds that I don't have enough expressed breast milk for (only expressing around 60ml a day so far)

@vanilla I was in tears trying to express because I really struggled to get enough at the beginning. Some things that helped me were to make sure I relaxed, have a large glass of water every time I was feeding / expressing, massage the breast whilst expressing and avoiding citrus fruit (apparently this can reduce supply, not sure how true that is!) Good luck x

Vanilla do you feed one breast per feed? If so expressing the other one might work. And a first thing in the morning express is still much much more productive for me than any other time. Have you seen the haaka? Not tried myself but some other ladies get on well with it.

@vanilla8 hard to know without seeing you but it doesn't sound like you need to top up necessarily? It all hinges on whether your baby is failing to thrive or not. You don't sound worried. I think sometimes the birthweight can be a red herring or be artificially high if that makes sense? You might want to do a bit more reading before deciding but if your baby is gaining weight albeit slowly, weeing and pooing and alert then it might not be needed. How often are you feeding? I had similar with my DS1 and didn't top up, I just fed him every 1-1.5 hours during the day and we got there eventually. He 12 now and nearly as tall as me.

I have been away from MN for a few days so apologies for the long post. Lots to catch up.

@jennymac31 how is baby Nate feeling? Is he any better? That's great that you have some mummy's and babies session around you. I feel also much better if I can get out of the house. I found out that newbie boy can scream if he's inside but once we leave he calms down and goes to sleep. It's quite annoying that none believes me how inconsolable he can be in the house.

@CoxsOrangePippin as long as your DH can wake up when baby cries I would take a risk. Baby newbie grunts when he is uncomfortable/windy/going for a poo but it transforms into proper cry only when he is hungry or needs a nappy change. Did you manage to get to the CBT session?

@MrsJW15 Well done for baby W for weight gain and being discharged by the midwifes 💪

@Barnes79 I have lost some weight but need to lose more. The thing is I haven't managed to find the exercise time or prepare healthy meals from scratch with the baby on my lap

@Barnes79 @Rustler74. @Tickyboovicki my DH is quite good in parenting apart from dealing with crying. When baby newbie cries DH wants to do sth to comfort the little one and stop crying. He doesn't get it that babies sometimes cry when they are tired or overstimulated and it takes a while to stop them. Shushing/rocking/swaddling doesn't help baby newbie and I have to deal with crying baby and frustrated husband that is feeling helpless.

@Acorncat Baby newbie likes being in the sling but he is easily overheating in this weather (we are both very warm by nature). It seems to me that he is also lactose intolerant (like his mum) as when we switched to lactofree milk powder for topup feeds poonami&excessive winds have stopped.

@WishIWasSleeping Lovely little rascal pic 😍 I love stretchy wraps too.

@Walkerbean16 @BouncingBlueberry Lovely pic 😍

@RedBlu hope you are getting better. I have got two bouts of mastits and it's crap.

@FoxMulder @teainbed morning shower is a must-do for me, it keeps me sane.

@savagehk I always try and offer both breasts every feed but if he goes a long time on one breast and sleeps I don't wake him for the other, so have been expressing that one.

@teainbed midwife was happy and discharged us but it's HV that is not.
I think his birth weight (8lb5) was inflated due to emcs and fluids I had during labour - he was quite bloated at birth and lost weight in hospital literally the next day. He is currently 7lb12.
I have been feeding atleast every 3 hours - in reality this has been around 1.5-2 hours in day, but have made conscious effort yesterday and today to feed more often so just camped to sofa with snacks at the moment!

Thanks for all your advice, HV is coming to weigh again on Monday.

HV thought the same with BabyTea a combination of diabetes and IV fluids on labour made him seem heavier than he was.

Anyone else got a hot grumpy baby today??

@newbieho - nate is still having quite a few poos bur they aren't as runny or mucus-like as they were yesterday so I think he's on the mend. He's been pretty happy with himself yesterday and today, it's just been a bit annoying that we were changing his nappies so often but there we are.

tea very hot & grumpy.

Been a rubbish day...so unsettled, won't nap despite me trying every technique! Escalated into full on screaming tonight.

I've expressed a couple of bottles, which she took well, but now im worried ive messed up bf - shes been screaming & getting so distressed at the breast today, not taking anything! I gave her a bottle of formula out of desperation & she downed it & settled! What could be going on? She's 5 weeks on Monday & we had been bf brilliantly.

Our little boy was weighed by the health visitor this morning and even if his weight was initially plotted wrongly onto the chart, he seems to have picked up and gone back to his original percentile line, 25th with 3.870kg (8lbs 8.5oz) That's one proud mama (and papa!) having achieved this with breastfeeding alone!
My HV seemed to be burnt on faulting me though as after plotting weight wrongly she said baby was still a bit jaundiced. Until she saw him in daylight... I was not overly pleased! She may be a newly qualified health visitor but perhaps also lacks the life experience and people skills some of my previous colleagues and friend HV have...

I wish I would have been told at the antenatal courses that BF is not an easy journey. I am pleased I stuck at it but I also know I'm blessed for having been able to do exclusively so. Those among my friends who haven't been able to keep bf: I now understand why!
Thanks all for keeping me sane! You're such a wonderful bunch x
OH has been feeling better now but as soon as he relapses I will speak to health visitor team. (Not mine, sorry)

@vanilla8 I've been told to not feed on 2nd breast unless first breast is empty. Knowing that hind milk theory may have been debunked I know what I feel at the end of a feed, slow thick milk trickling out. That is the 'dessert' containing more fat. Little rustling baby has been visibly thriving since the day he started feeding for longer but I swear to you I have no idea how he or I suddenly managed that. I'd like to try the haaka before I buy it so I can see what I gain as my other breast feels a bit engorged (jealous? ) at the end of a feed. Anyone got theories on that?

tea, sipper any tips on cooling the wee mite down? Our flat is consistently as hot indoors as outdoors so poor baby is at 27-28 degrees. I can see little veins on his scalp I hadn't spotted before, don't know if I just failed to notice them or if that's connected to how they regulate temp through their heads.

@jennymac31 good to hear Nate is on the mend. I think even when the little ones are ok the number of dirty nappies is enormous ;)

@Sipperskipper Maybe hot weather is affecting baby Skipper? Our 5 week boy is mixed fed and he switches between bottle/breast with no issues. My milk supply is also not affected looking at the number of breast milk leaks.

@Rustler74 Well done for the little boy for gaining weight! For me bf was also the most difficult thing that caught me by surprise. I think that antenatal courses should also mention bf struggles new mums may experience post labour.