July 2016

[primarynoodle]

Hopefully this works...

So we can keep in touch and pass on words of wisdom!

Perhaps someone clever could link to the stats?

Dats - totally understand your family of four comment and second time around enjoyment. It's fab isn't it? Oh went back to work on wed and I only slightly shat myself and wept pity-party tears for just a minute or two after the front door shut.

Cheery - Erratic feeds here too. Just going with the flow (& Dummies can be lifesavers).

Claudia had a dirty nappy every change and then nothing for THREE days until a poonami at 4am brought the poo drought to an end. The smell (yeasty chicken) actually woke oh up. I love my daughter!

had help from breastfeeding support today to work on the latch. not much help! i also asked for help with feeding positions when out and about (ie no pillows!!) & she advised me to take a bottle of expressed milk to save messing about(!!). showed me pictures of how baby should be latched which look identical to how dd latches but dd still doesnt draw enough nipple into her mouth so still lipstick shaped. she said that didnt matter as long as nipples werent cracking??? then said i had short nipples but it was basically nothing i can do about that as i have to work with what ive got but to give up shields as it makes baby lazy i suspect dd cant latch due to short nipples but "massive norks" (dats, 2016!) then got me feeding in an uncomfortable position which i could never replicate. so much conflicting advice!!!

That's such a shame that she gave you unhelpful advice. The comment about expressed milk is particularly unhelpful! Was she a peer supporter or someone with proper training?

When I'm out and about, I try and find something I can use as a footstool. I then use a raised bent leg as support for the baby if you see what I mean. Sitting with legs crossed can also work. A folded blanket is a good substitute for a pillow too.

I've used a little device called a Latch Assist to help draw the nipple out, it might be worth a try. There's also a technique called the exaggerated latch which can help to get a deeper latch. I think there are videos on YouTube that show how to do it.

I was trying to find the breastfeeding board today but ended up in slings and carriers! Thanks will try again!

It was a proper feeding person which was even more disappointing. I have seen exaggerated latch but can't manage it, end up moving and it slips. Good tip about cross legged on a footstool, could always rest on our massive changing bag! Thanks.

Indians the issue is still lipstick nipple despite tongue tie being snipped so baby has a shallow latch, however she does well with the shields as they are quite long so seem to get to the back of her mouth unlike my short nipples!

Will try that latch assist thank you for suggesting it. Feeling frustrated!

dolly that's very disappointing. I second to try someone else! And hope you get on better with them. I would be annoyed by the expressed milk comment! V unhelpful. I have often fed G in my car with him on my lap?!

That's helpful indians. Although none of mine have ever successfully self latched?! (Stumpy nips over here) I have to almost push the nipple area forward by making a V shape with my hand? Wish I could feed lying down like that!! Anyone have any tips?! Would be a dream for the 12am, 2am and 5am feeds

speak this latch assist you speak of sounds good!! .. Where do you get them from?

Welcome home cheery very happy for you!! Crazy feeding is totally normal!! Maurice is BEAUTIFUL!

dats you crack me up!! Norks totally the same thing happened when my milk came in. Just too huuumungous expressed some before he fed which helped loads, and my milk has settled down now and is fine. I've stored the excess in the freezer!

beaut how have your headaches been today?

On iPad so can't reply properly but I have lipstick nipple issues with no pain whatsoever and dd is gaining weight like a beast!

I also match dats' mahoosive norks and raise her ginormous areolas! Dd is never nose to nipple when she latches and never has the whole areola in her mouth...

Health visitor laughed when I told her my concerns re the above - "has Annie not read the rule Book? Oh dear " she said...

I.e. If it feels comfortable and baby is gaining well, don't worry if your latch/schedule/feeding length etc isn't 'textbook'

(I would also like to perfect the lying down hold but the mahoosive norks get in the way!)

cookies you can get the latch assist from mothercare, Amazon etc:

www.mothercare.com/Lansinoh-Latch-Assist/635648,default,pd.html

I could never master laying down to feed even after 22 months! That latch assist thingy, would a hand breast pump do a similar thing? I don't have flat nipples per se but when I was using my hand pump to try and reduce the old norkage, it obvs plumped up my nips at the same time.

Latching really can be tricky - I use the method in Indians pics too. It's just not always easy when they're this little to get them to open their teeny mouths wide enough at exactly the right moment and angle when you're poised to shove your boob in! It does get easier. I hold DS (oooh that's the first time I've typed that) around the shoulders with a bit of neck support and have his body very straight across me. So I can still get that bit right and that helps. But then I'm dodging and ducking and weaving and going 'open wide, open wide, open...oh come on babyyyyy!!' and rarely get him on first go.

Bluebell I stumbled across an article yesterday about the bloody bobbing fists - it used to drive me nuts with DD, too. Apparently it's because they can't see well enough, so they're actually seeking out your sore, tender nips with their scratchy little razor fingers ON PURPOSE, the buggers! And the way to stop it is to shove as much boob in their faces. I tested this theory today with mixed results.

Does anyone have any brilliant remedies for the pain in my bum? I'm not constipated and I'm not pregnant anymore so why oh why won't my fucking bleeding literally Farmers just do one? It's depressing. I can't stand up too long due to normal bruised undercarriage stuff, but I can't sit down too long because my bum hurts!

And my feet are grotesquely swollen and have been for four or five days. Can't get anything on them so I couldn't leave the house if I even wanted to. Anyone else of the nana foot persuasion? I look like I'm about to have a coronary at any moment :-/

dats xx

Thank you so much to you all for the advice and support re my headaches. I don't know if it's just coincidence but I needed a break so decided to give two formula feeds a day to Monty-Beau and breast feed the rest of the day. So far so good and no headaches for two days. So extra thanks to cheery for suggesting mixed feeding.

DH has gone on the stag do. I'm pretty pissed off and have made my feelings clear. It was ok up until late last night. M fed between 9 and 11.30pm. Poor Teddy fell out of bed and i had to leave him for a while as M was screaming. In the end I have just woken so had a 4 hour sleep. Hoping to get a couple of hours after this feed before Teddy wakes. DH has been messaging all night that he loves me blah, blah. I haven't really replied. I don't think I want to go to this wedding Monty-Beau will only be 4 weeks old and I just think it's too early to leave him.

Indians I love Kim she's so funny. Also loving Hallies hair. My first two had lots of hair but the last two are pretty sparse.
So pleased that the tongue tie snip has made such a difference for you.

Cheery how crap that DHs paternity has all but gone. Could he take some holiday.
Are you using plenty of Lansinoh on your nips to help with the soreness. I put it on after every feed and when I get out of the shower I reapply.
Maurice is so gorgeous.

Cookies I keep having a chuckle to myself every time I feed. Offering the poor boy my big sweaty boob. So mean.
I don't know what to wear either. I only have a couple of breastfeeding specific items of clothing. I'm going to have to get some more.

Julfin how are your headaches now? Any improvement or explanation as to what's causing them.
With regards to feeding it takes me a while to latch on Monty-Beau as he doesn't open his mouth wide enough at the start. I just keep brushing my nipple over his lips until he does open wide enough. I use the cross cradle hold to start, using my other hand to squeeze my nipple so I can get more of it in his mouth. Once he's latched I switch my hold to the cradle hold otherwise I get arm/shoulder ache.

Bird thank you for your reply about my headaches. Hope feeding has improved for you. You sound like a pro.

Dats I do love reading your posts you make me laugh. Pleased that feeding seems to be going well for you despite those massive norks of yours.
My feet, ankles and legs are ridiculously swollen still and I'm now on day 15

Well health visitor yesterday and Monty-Beau is now 8lb 13oz. Birth weight 7lb 6oz so I'm really pleased. He has gained the most of all my babies.

Not caught up properly yet but thought I'd post a picture of Ben. 4 weeks 2 days old, just chilling to the sound of Mary Berry's voice.

Becks he's so cute. We have those vests but he's grown out of them now.

Thanks Beaut , Bens grown out of lots already. Just in the 0-3 stuff now. I must get him weighed I'm sure he's put on lots!

Monty-Beau is in the up to one month for now but it won't be long for the 0-3. That means I'm going to have to start selling the stuff I'm not using. End of an era

Yeah me too, Ben is definite our last. I think il going to save it up make it into bundles and do either a boot sale or try and sell in FB sites. I've got a friend who's son is the same ages as DD and she's just had a little girl so are going to swap our clothes then once they've grown out of it we'll sell it.

Beaut do you have any tips on how to deal with older siblings. DD is 3.5 and she's being quite naughty and more worryingly she's being rough and intentionally trying to hurt Ben, pinching, hitting, poking and being rough. Ben's very good so I do spend time with her and we've been out every single day since he was born!!!! Telling her off doesn't work, if anything it makes it worse! She's also started trying to hit the cat!! She's usually so placid and gentle. She's really struggling but can't put it into words.

Becks are you getting her involved with the Ben. Teddy is 3.2. I ask him to get me the nappy, wipes and cream from the change box whenever I do a change. I'll say things like "oh wow you're so helpful what a great boy". During the day I'll also say things like "you are such a great big brother", "Monty-Beau really loves you because your so good for mummy". He isn't good all the time and has tried to hit him a few times. I just firmly say "no we don't do that". I also distract, distract, distract. So if I can see the start of a tantrum I'll ask him if he wants to do stickers or playdoh or give him a choice of activities eg "if you're grumpy then you won't be able to choose if we watch a movie or play cars". Basically just keep going with that sing songy voice and try not to rise to the tantrum. We do put Teddy on the bottom step now if he's really naughty it's our time out step. He has been OK as he's not too interested.

With the Ben?? With Ben obviously

Any toys that will act as a distraction will help. So some new books, DVDs, playdoh, colouring books. Anything that she loves that will keep her occupied.

The best thing we bought Teddy was a boy baby dolly. So he looks after him and copies what I do with Monty-Beau.

Thanks all :) I would get a second opinion help but all the "help" I've been offered by "professionals" so far is so conflicting or poor in quality I'm not sure I can take any more, I felt very frustrated after yesterday.

Thanks for the photos Indians, very helpful especially chin position thanks. I think half the problem is I can't see whats going on down there!

Thanks PrimaryNoodles - that makes me feel so much better! Giant areolas here too so no chance of getting it all in! Makes me feel better your midwife saying that about the text book.

Does anyone know what the issue is with feeding with shields is it because they aren't very efficient and baby can get lazy? I feel like we are doing OK with them, feeding is just slow and she seems less satisfied with a bottle of expressed milk! All the professionals were keen for me to do away with them but she doesn't do lipstick nipple in them as they are quite long so think she actually gets the nipple more or less to where it is meant to be.

Becks - I involve DD in the process with DD2, she loves binning the nappy bags and putting blankets on the baby. She needed to be taught exactly what gentle means and sometimes is still rough (unintentionally though) our DD was good with the baby but so out of routine in the first 2 weeks she played up every time we had visitors over, it was exhausting. Once we got more strict about her routine again she seemed to improve, is that something you are already doing? Hard with a new addition I know! PS - Ben is gorgeous!