March '13 - The One With The Babax

[Plonkysaurus]

New thread , and I can assure you all, it'll be a corker.

Worse might it be worth ordering some milk from amazon prime for next day delivery just in case?

Well done yummy! (For eco's benefit, that's 2.5kg, which when you think of it in bag of sugar terms is loads.)

Worse, send that man to the shops right now! Your health is a priority, remember.

The terrible twos appear to have started: Fartypants used "fuck off" in context yesterday. The man cracked up laughing - bad move! The grin on her face when she saw his reaction... she's totally going to do that again. Just not sure where she got it from - some bloodys and buggers slip out from time to time but neither of us really use that particular phrase.

Letter dropped through the letterbox today telling me that I have an appointment in a few weeks for DS's 2 year HV check. WIBU to call them and say thanks but no thanks?

plonky our 2yr check is tomorrow. There is no harm in it but it's up to you if you want to go.

worse why are you expected to go to the shops? Get dh or ask a favour of the nanny.

stormy it is amazing how much toddlers absorb.

Thank you all for your words of encouragement. We have had a nice few days with ds. He has matured a bit. He listens to my instructions and he is fun to be around.

plonky wwe are not bothering with the two year check (and haven't bothered with any other HV checks either). From what I hear the two year one is not particularly useful and has come with damaging advice from some HV not up to speed with their training.

Yummy the paranoid part of me worries that I'll have you knocking on my door if I fail to engage with HVs. Silly I know, especially as he goes to nursery, but they can be quite off putting with their interrogating ways.

rainbow the letter came with a behaviour survey thingamy to fill in, and as I was doing it I realised that he can do, or is starting to do, everything it asks. So I have no concerns about his health or development, and nursery haven't raised anything with me either. It just seems like a time wasting exercise for everyone involved. I'll never forget the HV who told me I was overfeeding DS at 6 weeks old, because he sometimes spit up a tiny amount of milk after a feed. I'm sure some HVs are great, but that one didn't exactly inspire me with confidence!

I find it amazing that two years in these toddles are developing in such pronounced leaps and bounds. DS is having great fun with names at the moment, and he has to know everybody's name. He's taken to striding into his nursery room and prodding other kids in the chest, saying their name and big ELLO! before walking off again. Hilarious. Will try to convince him not to be so proddy though. Proddy in the poking things way, not the other one, obvs.

Feel free to cancel the HV, Plonk, they're not obligatory. And nursery are well placed to inform you if there are any issues.

In other news, argh, CVs, why do they exist? Argh.

plonky if nursery were to raise concerns about parenting and make a referral to social services then we would expect some level of engagement with health visiting services. We will definitely not knock on your door if there are no concerns with ds development and you not wanting to engage with health visitors.

Got to go ds has come home from nursery...

Hi ladies
worse how are you this evening? Any progress?
betty for yesterday!!
yummy great news on the pounds lost. That must be motivating to continue?
stormy we've not had swearing yet. You're right the reaction probably means it will happen again! DS isn't as articulate as toddle storm yet though so sure it is a matter of time. Trying to watch my language around him..
wotta I had to waste spend money on my car this week which made me think of you! Agh. Money I could have done without losing.
plonk we got a letter saying that they no longer do 2 year checks as they aren't necessary (!) but we can contact them if any concerns. Like rainbow I don't think a huge amount of my HV (I've let others who are good) so I'm happy not to have the hassle. DS is doing well so I'm happy could do with fewer
tantrums though .
eco how are you? Have you been busy?
I'm on the wind down from work now. Only a few weeks left. I've definitely slowed down noticeably in the last 2-3 weeks so pleased the end is almost in sight!

Plonky I've had the questionnaire too, and we're being assessed next week . Oh joy. They're combining it with Babax's 6 week check, so I guess I'll just go with it, even though I'd rather not bother. Seems like such a waste of time.

Amazing progress today - I think the antihistamines are kicking in . Woke this morning to completely clear skin, which had me running round in a hyperactive way proclaiming myself cured. Unfortunately I'm not, I was hived up again by lunchtime, but relatively mildly. This level I can deal with. I'm itchy, but it's manageable, and my face looks slightly acne-fied rather than full on scary.

DH has done his last toddle bed time duty for a week as he's off up north again tomorrow, so I'm making the most of a rare moment of free time. I probably ought to go to bed though as tomorrow is going to be tough. The nanny has the day off too. I am so going to miss her when she goes, but hopefully her hard work getting Babax on a sensible 3-4 hour feeding schedule will make my life relatively easy. Here's hoping....

Excellent, I'll call the hv today and tell get to do one. Politely, of course. It does seem like a huge waste of time, and there'll be another parents evening at nursery soon.

So Worse have you decided to carry on with breastfeeding for the foreseeable? You could always try mixed feeding if you need some respite. Hope you continue to respond to the antihistamines anyway. It sounds a grim situation. And omg is Babax really six weeks already? Good grief, where does the time go?!

Shattered it must feel good to be winding down at work. Are you taking the full year's leave?

Ds seems a bit sad at the moment. I'm sure it's because DH is away, although he's not really asked about daddy. Apparently he could only be cheered up yesterday by doing a lot of painting. He also fell off a bike at nursery and cut his lip open. And to top it all off he's going to have to learn to share me. massive guilt!

worse glad to hear you are feeling better - do the antihistamines make the breastfeeding manageable? Useful to know that there are some that can be used safely while feeding. I'm hoping to qualify as a lactation consultant in the future so useful to hear such a wide range of experiences. Out of curiosity how do you get a baby on a 3-4 hour feeding schedule - what happens when they get hungry off schedule? I always wondered as DD has always been on demand fed and had such a massively variable schedule and would also make herself know very audibly when hungry!

shattered must be nice to know you are winding down and there is an end in sight!

Yes Plonky, still bf-ing. For some daft reason I just can't stop, for selfish reasons as much as anything. Probably has something to do with my not liking the whole maternity nurse thing. The other day I cried when I saw another mum with a tiny baby out shopping, because Babax was at home and not with me. It hurts almost physically handing him other, but on the other hand I'm not daft. I can see coping with both when DH is away would be hellish.

Try not to feel guilty, we've gone through exactly the same transition here and the toddle is fine. DH is away every week, I'm constantly feeding a new baby, and she's often made to wait for my time and attention. We've had a few hurt looks, and sitting in the corner looking woebegone, but now she's got to grips with the new set up she's totally fine with it. The end of a bf means toddle cuddle time and she comes hurtling over to claim that, and I also keep other times free for one on one with her. Bath time, bedtime story time etc. All her's.

Skin clearish again this morning, so I should have until lunch until I feel horrible again. I'll take that as a good day

Rainbow cross post. I'm on cetirizine 10mg per day, which is a non-drowsy one and completely safe when bf-ing. Babax has not suffered any side effects. The improvement for me has been massive. If you google hives you'll find some pictures of people with completely scarlet swollen skin, no pale patches. That was me. Now I'm largely spotty with a few large patches, so I'm uncomfortable, but it in an unbearable situation.

The 3-4 hour schedule - I think her years of experience with a large number of babies has given her an insight into why babies are crying. When I'm on my own I latch him on when ever he wakes crying, as I assume if his nappy is ok he is hungry. He's not. When I was doing this he often had green nappies as he was snacking so not sucking deeply, hence getting too much sugary fore milk, and not enough fatty hind milk. She has worked out that in some cases he wakes because he is in an uncomfortable position and is crying because he is tired. Not being the mum hence not milky she can settle him down to sleep again. Since starting this routine his nappies are always yellow, never green, he is much happier, and his feeds are good ones. He sucks deeply, doesn't get distressed, gulps less air, and is noticeably more settled. Based on that I'd say she knows what she's doing. It's funny really, as so many times I've said he's hungry far more often than every 3-4 hours, and he really hasn't been. That said, occasionally he is. When he is it is obvious, his crying is different. It also tends to be after a poor feed, when he has been too sleepy to take in enough milk. A proper feed (for him) is 40 mins (proper deep sucking for at least 20 of that). I'm just beginning to learn this.

Worse you're like an actual real life superhero. A DH a long distance away a lot, a toddle and a BFing squish. From now on you're my inspiration. And I've suddenly developed disgusting oily spotty preggo face. Not hives, admittedly, but y'know. I'm trying.

I've been trying to gently introduce the idea of another baby to ds. Admittedly he's not one for abstract thought yet but as he'll be 2.8 when the new baby arrives I figure that he can actually engage with it as a good thing if I approach it correctly. Does that make sense? But he looked seriously hurt when I told him there was a baby in my tummy. Although it could have been gas.

Rainbow what a fantastic ambition! I'd like your services in tap from November please. Skype would be a good way of doing this!

Rainbow I fed on demand for the first few weeks......no idea how many......eight maybe......Anyhow, ecobaby soon settled into her own rhythm where she demanded every three to four hours regular as clockwork. I guess babies are different in their efficiency and requirements. I suppose her early patterns have led to this situation we currently have where she never ever asks during the day for milk now. From our breastfeeding and beyond group it seems she's fairly atypical for an 'extended' breastfed baby but fed she is and as a consultant to be it's great that you are trying to build a picture of all the normals out there. Tell us how your journey goes. I'm very unusual in my new area for breastfeeding past six weeks let alone breastfeeding at two years. No idea what the demand for a consultant would be but it sounds interesting. So pleased you're feeling better worse. Sorry that you've got a sad baby plonk. He won't be sad by the time number two (we need a better name....do we have one?) arrives.

All this feeding talk is going a bit over my head, and not just because I failed at boob juice. We never fed on demand, because Fartypants never demanded. I feel as though I missed out slightly.

Anyway. In better news, the man finally went to the doctor's for the results of last year's blood tests. Hyperthyroidism, probable diabetes, and suspected Graves disease (whatever that is). Worse dear, could you remind me of the benefits of fixing a wonky thyroid so I can present him with some positives to a lifetime of medication?

eco "consultant" is probably too fancy a term - its more about providing peer support but with proper training to provide guided support. Basically it's about filling the gap where there is little or no NHS services (as in our local area). I'm hoping to do the next course run by our local breastfeeding support group but that depends on my being able to leave DD in the evenings which is not feasible yet. She is definitely the typical full term breastfeeding toddler in the sense that breastfeeding is essentially her comfort blanket. Having said that we rarely feed in the day these days and it's more an evening, night and morning activity. I love it on days when I am out all day at work but some days it can be pretty intense. I know I will miss it when she weans though and she is such a big girl now that I am just trying to enjoy these feeds because I know they could end at anytime.

worse sounds like your nanny is wonderful - the experienced support must be invaluable! I guess if we all still lived in extended family units we would all have such support and guidance from the experienced female family members who have been there already (although having said that both my mum and gran did things so differently from me that I doubt they would have been of much use in that respect!)

Oh dear Stormy, no wonder he can't sort himself out if he's got all that physical stuff going on. It explains a lot, I think. If he's refusing medication just google Graves Disease and show him the results. It sounds horrific. Or just point out that if he's diabetic and not medicating he won't see his child grow up. Surely that will do it? Long term medication is free too, so money isn't an argument against it.

eco yep DS has 7 months to turn his frown upside down :) Hmm number two isn't the nicest name is it? When I was cooking DS we referred to him as Zippy. George is obviously not a contender, name wise, so I guess it'll have to be Bungle or Geoffrey? Both a bit wet after Zippy though, who is always playing with his twanger.

We did bottle feeding on demand. That's bloody frantic in the early days when you're trying to make a bottle and cool it before your baby has a melt down and refuses it altogether. I hope I can entirely avoid it next time, so thanks Rainbow, you've given me the nudge I needed to write 'Find BF support' on my prenatal to do list.

Stormy tell DP that getting the correct treatment for my thyroid condition was like someone handing me my life back. I went from feeling physically and emotionally out of control, to being happy, healthy and full of energy literally over night. I was a super fit long distance runner in my teens, but by my twenties I couldn't climb the stairs when I got home from work. One tablet was all it took to get me back on the running track. It's no more hassle than taking a vitamin.

stormy My TSH level was 5.14. GP said it was .14 over the normal range and think this is an anamoly (sp?) and want to retest. I hope they get to the bottom of why I feel so tired. Iron levels are little low but still in the range. It's frustrating. My point is if your dp wants to feel well and spend quality time with his daughter he needs to take his medication and in a way be grateful he knows why he feels they way he does.

worse so lunchtime has passed. How do you still feel?

shattered are you due in May? Do you have nickname for baby number 2? Everyday is a step towards your maternity leave so you can relax and potter about. If you can with ds around.

rainbow good luck with your training.

plonky zippy is a great nickname. How is the nausea?

We went for our 2yr check. Ds didn't play ball and was stuck to me because he was shy. He wouldn't even take his coat off. Health visitor took my word about his development being well and off we went.

Ds has settled well into the toddler room this week. He fell asleep before lunchtime the other day but I suppose he will eventually get used to the new routine.

That's the way I view it, yummy - it's not "oh no, you're decrepit and buggered", it's more "now we know why you're decrepit and buggered, we can fix that!" Which is a positive thing, I think.

Plonk if you're taking votes I reckon Bungle would be an excellent name for a bump.

Four weeks until FP starts nursery too. Still apprehensive!

It's crap when people need long term medication Stormy, but it'd be even crappierer if there wasn't even the opportunity to get medication. My friend got DVT when she was 26 and is very much of the mindset that shit happens, but she's lucky all the same.

FP will be grand at nursery. The key is to say goodbye, tell them you'll see them after they've played/napped/had dinner and get the hell out of there, let the staff get on with settling her in. It's tough but you'll come to love nursery days!!

Yummy Nausea isn't bad at all tbh, it's subsided quite a lot. Hopefully for good! I can drink tea, which is a big comfort when I can't have a glass of wine and a dirty fag. I did cry at Masterchef last night though. Durrr.

Yummy you have illustrated exactly why it is so hard to get a thyroid condition quickly diagnosed - the normal range used in the UK is so wide it fails to appreciate that what is 'normal' may not be 'normal' for you. 5.14 is high, and in fact according to this website :

www.thyroiduk.org.uk/tuk/testing/thyroid_blood_tests.html

is actually outside the normal range. If your TSH levels are high, even borderline high, and you are exhibiting symptoms then you should be referred to an endocrinologist who can properly assess you. Go back armed with research from the web (google, there is loads out there), ask for a retest to see if your TSH is consistently at the upper end of the range. Request a referral.

Do any of these wound familiar?:

Symptoms of Hypothyroidism
Fatigue
Weakness
Weight gain or increased difficulty losing weight
Coarse, dry hair
Dry, rough pale skin
Hair loss
Cold intolerance (you can't tolerate cold temperatures like those around you)
Muscle cramps and frequent muscle aches
Constipation
Depression
Irritability
Memory loss
Abnormal menstrual cycles
Decreased libido

If yes, you definitely need further investigation. PM me if you need any further help.

Well I haven't been able to stop crying today. No reason (no, def no pg) and feeling very overwhelmed to the extent ive booked to see my gp on tuesday about depression. But maybe it's just my thyroid ! Quite fancy one pill making me feel instantly better!