October 2014 // thread 4 // a lot of night feed chatting!

[sazzlehopes]

Welcome everyone. You're doing a good job by the way. Remember that.

"Billy is blowing his trumpet;
Bertie is banging a tin;
Betty is crying for mummy
and Bob has pricked Ben with a pin.
The baby is crying out loudly-
He's out on the lawn with his pram.
I am the only one silent
And I've eaten all of the jam"

I've got a Monday deadline for some work and spent all of the baby's asleep time this morning trying to make microsoft word track changes properly instead of actually being able to do anything. Now I've stuck her in the sling to see if I can work around her head but she keep drooling down my front in a quest for attention. LIVING THE DREAM.

Quick update on the reflux/doctor saga : i had to phone for a phone consultation as i am still too sick to go into the surgery, baby is really constipated as i changed her formula at the weekend to aptimal "anti reflux" it has made a bit of a diffrence, so i mentioned on the phone to the doctor (who was diffrent from fridays one) about a pediatrician only being able to prescribe omprezole or rantinidan and he basically backed him up and said that the surgery "takes extra precautions" regarding prescribing babies reflux medication, so i asked to be referred to a pediatrician as i told him i cannot watch my baby suffer until she can take solids, then having endless trouble when she is actually on solids!!!

He also told me that going A&E wouldnt prescribe either of these either ? WTF?? I only live in glasgow so probably not far from most of you? Am i being bull shitted ?

Stigz they are bullshitting you to protect budgets. I'm in Fife and our GP prescribed, begrudgingly, omeprazole to my DS. I called NHS24 and got an out of hours appointment (rather than going to A&E, it saves you waiting hours) when Lil's reflux made her hoarse - she was put on ranitidine by the doc at OOH and our GP has continued the course. It would be against the hippocratic oath to take her off meds which are clearly stopping her pain. Call NHS24 (111) tonight if he's in pain and sort it that way.

Stigz that does sound bollocks eh, my friend is a nurse at Yorkhill (so handy!) so I've texted to ask her as well, I'll let you know when she gets back to me.

Nice poem tatty

stigz that's utter bullshit ! Call Ooh tonight x

Bad day for me and my little DD. 8 weeks injections, and check showed she has a heart murmur. Fairly common apparently, but they are worried as she's not feeding well and dropping percentiles.

Then went to see less than useless health visitor for weigh in, to find she's dropped a further percentile. So she was originally between 25th and 50th and now she's between 2nd and 9th. She was horrible and really accusatory about how i'm feeding her. Cried and argued with her. I am doing EVERYTHING i can to get as much down her, every three hours or less. (Feeds take up to an hour) Got told i need to implement a more aggressive eating plan, and that 'i was telling her two different stories'. By this point I was in tears and was trying to recap from memory he feeding amounts and times for the past 24 hours' and getting confused. Very upset, and think am gonna put in a complaint.

very not like me to get upset, am as cool as a cucumber and very strong, but this HV upset me so much

Betty, that sounds awful. There is no way your HV should be aggressive with you; they're meant to support you and help you, not judge and bully you. Put in a complaint, then ask to speak to another HV to work out new strategies for helping your baby put on weight.

Thanks badger. I have rung And left a message asking who to complain to. I saw her two weeks ago and she said she'd get the home health visitor to do a home visit because of This issue, but she obviously forgot because it didnt happen. I'm pretty ok with things like that as mistakes do happen, things do get missed - but after today i'm going to mention this also

betty that's terrible. Complain if you have the energy - but can imagine its not top of your priorities right now.
Can you start writing down what she eats and when - will help to understand what's going on and also get a new HV with a more constructive attitude

Betty, poor you :(

What on earth does she think you should be doing differently? How horrible for you.

My DS is 9th centile and dropping slightly off that curve, it's an awful worry I know.

Thanks both. Yep, i've got a phone ap and i'm trying to record everything. It just so happened that I'd entered the amounts for the past 24 hours but not the exact timings, so I was getting in a tiz trying to remember it all because I already felt like I was being judged. Will ensure i record it properly, as gonna go to the docs tomorrow to see what they say and I know it will be helpful to see what i'm doing

Betty that's awful. Have you had any support from a breastfeeding peer supporter? There will be one attached to your local children's centre and they were brilliant when my first baby wasn't gaining weight, really knowledgeable and supportive - they even helped fight my corner with the health visitor when she was suggesting formula top ups.

I genuinely dont know what I should be doing differently. i know why she is loosing though - Feeding every three hours or less, but she takes a very varying amount, anything from 70 to 140. She doesnt meet her minimum criteria in a 24 hour period. Its a struggle to get anything past about 60 really but I battle on. She just starts chewing the teat instead of sucking, or pushing it out of her mouth or just sits and looks at me with the teat in her gaping mouth. I change positions constantly, wind her all the time, and put her on the floor until she wakes a bit, if sleepy.

She isnt tongue tied. She has a bit of reflux, but doesnt seem to be anything major.

Sorry for the rant ladies. Just feels good to get it out, until poor Dh gets home!

Sorry, should have said - am formula feeding. was doing combo of breast and formula until 6 weeks and now she's just formula

betty and stigz I really feel for you! It's so hard when the "professionals" let you down, they should know the way that all people want to be treated never mind us exhausted mums!
I had my 8 week check with dr yesterday and the gp was horrible told me my bp was too high and I was overweight!! A bit of a knock to my confidence as I now fit into pre pregnancy clothes! I think some have no idea about bedside manner! Rant over ...

Betty that sounds awful, definitely complain. Puts my HV rant into perspective - I stupidly mentioned today that we were cosleeping for part of the night. Got an earful. I know they have to but still...

I ended up saying that everyone I knew had coslept at times and that everyone just lies to HV. She told me tragic story of local baby who was suffocated by toddler sibling when cosleeping. It clearly wasn't very cheering to hear the story and also cannot be applied to the very safe way I am cosleeping when I do. I wish the UK would catch up and teach safe cosleeping methods as opposed to have a blanket no approach. For what it's worth I really don't like co sleeping but am doing it for second half of night as would otherwise be up at 3am every day which in my opinion will lead to a level of sleep deprivation with greater risk involved. Agh rant over. Just hate feeling judged by HVs.

Thanks girls, just phoned nhs 24, waiting on call back.

I can't believe how some of you have been treated by HVs/ doctors, think I would've cried too. Awful people.
We've had a good day- only one episode of red faced, real tears screaming. Then just sat feeding and got attacked by the cat. Cue me smacking him off and yelling, scaring E making her squeal and DH threatening to kick the cat out for good.
Anyone know how to stop the cat getting jealous? He's been pretty good for 8 weeks but I see him getting grumpy and he can be quite aggressive

Good luck Stigz. I hope you get some proper, useful help.

STIGZ hope you have some luck. I would use the thinking of stopping BF that Yellow suggested & generally just loose the plot a little. Be strong & determined in 2 days with right meds you could have different baby.

Munday no advice, just keep bedroom door closed my MIL suggested they like to sit on babies head if jealous! :(
My poor DS is not well, upper respiratory tract infection causing him to choke & feed very poorly. I have been in agony with boobs all day so bought a hand pump and bottle earlier as I didn't like the waste this morning. Dumped approx 4 or 5oz. Anyway DS is 11 + 3 & thought it would be a battle to get him to take a bottle but no! He took to it like a duck to water. :) :) this means I can express & get DH to feed if I want a night out or for next hairdresser trip. Delighted.

Haha, my boyfriend just did an ace job of getting her to sleep at 8.30 (I'd been failing since 7 - first night of trying proper bedtime)... she's still asleep but he's left her lying in our bed, precariously on her side, head on pillow, under the duvet. Such s shame I'm going to have to wake her up to move her and probably feed her. She looks well cute though.

Good luck Stigz, hope NHS 24 are more helpful.

Hope your drs appointment goes well Betty. Are there any nice health visitors you could see? It sounds like it would be helpful for someone to watch her feeding so they can see you're already doing everything you can.

betty Have you tried moving up a teat size? DD2 is the same age as yours and she has just moved up as she was starting to take forever with feeds and really fussing. Also, I've found that HVs are really overly particular with centiles even when the baby is presenting as perfectly healthy - DD2 was born on the 90th but has now dropped to just under the 50th despite being FF from birth. But, before I developed GD she was measuring 50th on scans so I think she's just found her natural line.

whippet my son screams like mad at the drs and they just think hes a fussy baby! Eventually one of the younger gps said silent reflux and possible cmpi, how the hell they thought full on rage screaming was normal i'll never know
fate not only am i incredibly impressed by your routine but that your lo goes in a sleeping bag! My ds only sleeps when held so i thought the sleeping bag would make him feel more snuggled but he goes bat shit crazy, flinging his legs in the air and kicking constantly :s strange boy!