October 2014 // thread 3 // Maybe we'll get some sleep soon.

[MundayCakes85]

Last thread is full so here's a shiny new one

Kirsti very true - I wonder where they're redeemable? Listening on R4 it was trialled in a deprived area where BF rates at 6-8 weeks were just 30%, its so sad rates are so low so soon after birth and the folk who can least afford it are forking out for formula. Apparently the letter accompanying the voucher recognising the hard work and pain some Mums had gone through was also very motivating. I can believe that, it can feel thankless in the wee small hours of a growth spurt and there's constant "oh just give a bottle" from the well meaning if you mention tiredness which is often meant kindly but can undermine confidence and make BF seem unachievable or abnormal.

Ooooh, pebble, those are exactly the things I worry about. Really, though, when I'm being sensible I know it's fine- the feeding and the changing and comforting are what bonding are. And I wave a toy at her sometimes and read two pages of a book before she starts to shout at me, but reckon she's too small to know the difference between play and not play- all interactions are firing up her little brain. But although I tell myself those things I continue to suspect I've failed at motherhood already and she's probably irrevocably damaged DOOM DOOM DOOM.

Pebble if baby will happily sleep off you - be happy. Its not a sign of a bad bond just a good sleeper. My two both sleep pretty well at night but daytime sleep tends to be in the sling or pushchair because I get cabin fever and have never cracked napping in the cot.

I think it's one positive of over 2 weeks in special care. She had no choice but to sleep in her cot all day and night.

I don't have toys for her yet other than some teddies. Like you say, everything is new and interactive at this stage.

Pebble Jonas was like that after 5 days in the billi bed for jaundice. I let him sleep on me so much once I could hold him, I broke his daytime napping off me skills! So be thankful. As for entertainment they can only focus 30cm away and see everything upside down so the world is trippy enough at this stage. You'll have years of "I'm bored plaaaaay with me"

I've only got things bought for her by my friends- so for eg a rattle in the shape of a chicken drumstick and the world's most terrifying psychedelic bunny rabbit.

Haha, I had no idea about the upside-down vision. Imagine how trippy the bunny would be then!

Like this, but more so.

Sorry to all having it tough right now. Today I had my first ever bf in public awkward moment, in of all places the doctors surgery! My ds was having his 8 week check during which he decided he was hungry which was,fine I went with dd into waiting room and started feeding day. The nurse who done the check said how annoying he needs a feed I think you will be more comfortable in the baby changing room after me saying no thanks I am fine here the nurse just stood next to me staring and saying repeatedly the changing area would be better. I felt so awkward I left and fed in my car I am now annoyed with myself for not standing my ground more. To make it worse there is bf welcome stickers plastered all over the walls and the literature on the tables was all about the benefits of bf. Why did I not just tell her where to go?

Just realised I had a bit of a rant there, sorry about that

Ooh horsey I'd be tempted to let the surgery know about her!

Gosh Helen that sounds awful. I would have thought a doctors surgery was understanding.

So I just carried my baby in a sling around the house to get some chores done. He was ok for about 5mins then got bored and started yelping.

Hoping he will enjoy the sling in future as it felt great for me wearing him :)

Thanks pebble I probably should, just wish I said something at the time.

Horsey complain. That's out of order and she needs told. Intimidating a new Mum to feed outside in the car is not BF friendly

Horsey that's horrible, sorry you experienced that. My friend who has a young baby got shouted at in a cafe by an apparently pro breastfeeding woman who said that my friend wasn't feeding discreetly enough and therefore might be putting off other potential mums from breastfeeding in future wtf?! People really are strange...

Wow today has been fun. My little boy really does surprise me more every day with his complete ability to resist sleep. Managed three 10-15 catnaps today and he resisted sleep in pushchair, car and sling. I was so relying on the slings and carriers but now he won't even stay asleep in those. Anyway, my DD stopped napping entirely by 18 months which I was very relieved about as it was such a battle. Only 16 months left to go then! Wouldn't mind if we got more than 2-3 hours at night or he was 'happy awake'.

Anyway I don't recommend dealing with screaming overtired baby whilst trying to get three year old to doctors for her jabs at the same time as your relatives arriving and standing aimlessly in your very narrow hallway as you try to leave house. Oh and did I mention that one of the relatives is your strange socially inept stepbrother you're meeting for the very first time...

Sorry, long rant over! Anyway this time round I'm trying to laugh about things more than cry as I really don't want to spend my maternity leave stressed out. Managing it most days...

goats- sorry to hear your day has been full of screaming too....did your plan to get to bed at 7 work? Typically DS has fallen asleep on my now....15 mins before DH is home! I'm sure they've planned this between them!

My DS must have known it was my birthday, he went down at 7:30 for the first time ever!
I have had a Chinese & 2 glasses of red wine & I feel tipsy! I hope he stays asleep for at least 2 hours or I'm going to have the serious guilts about breast feeding! Ooohhh! I love red wine, that is the first guilt free glass I have had in a year! Happy Birthday me! :)

Captain that is def a new one! Sorry you have had a stressful day, my dd was never any good at sleeping in the day either. Yellow I think she got me at a weak moment I fed dd until she was 2 and never had any bother and thought if anyone ever said anything I would give them what for.

excited- Chinese and wine....sounds like a good night! Especially as your DS has gone to bed at 7:30 hope you've been spoilt!!

Well I spoke too soon- the crying started again. Poor little man has a sore tummy again. Even when he's asleep he's squirming round and keeps waking up with a high pitched squeal. So glad DH is home from work to take over for a bit. Not sure what else I can try- DS already has Colief and infacol

If anyone is swaddling when are you going to stop? Think he is feeling his arms are restricted but the startle reflex is still there...

I stopped swaddling after a couple of weeks of being at home, H likes to lie with her arms bent and hands up by her head and has a wee sook of her fist (she won't take a dummy), she doesn't do the startle thing in her Moses basket for some reason?

Same with him Kirsti but I have heard him startling in his basket this evening so not quite sure what to do.

I only swaddled from under her arms, and now she's in a grobag with arms out (long sleeved vest and babygro) - still has cold hands, but any attempt to cover them causes strops.

Boyfriend did ace job of putting sling on and wearing her around tonight, so no screaming while we ate dinner. Also she sat in the bouncy chair on the kitchen unit while we cooked, and happily smiled and chatted, so we've had a few hours break from her lung testing. Ramped it up before bedtime, but now fast asleep. I feel growth spurt in the air - my money is on a 1am wake up call!

Tatty that bunny would give me nightmares!!
Helen how awful that your nurse acted in that way, I bet you were shocked. I'd say something to the practice manager.
DD being very clingy and cottage cheesy sick tonight- she's like a ninja puker so I never know when I've got it down my cleavage!!
Wanted an early night as off to the in-laws tomorrow for a stressful weekend, never mind!

The screaming is in full flow here. Poor baby. Trapped wind and tummy ache is horrible.

goats my HV said not to worry about cold hands. My DDs are so cold they look a bit blue but got told as long as she's got one extra layer on and socks she's fine.