October 2014 (including some september early arrivals) the wonderful and crazy newborn days

[fedupofrainydays]

Thread to share the newborn news and support each other through the 'eeek what do I do?' When the baby gets home and you stare at it in the car seat and think - help!!

Thanks, gun.

I'm really sorry to hear that you and me are suffering with anxiety. I hope you can both get it under control asap.

pregnant it must be incredibly difficult to get bf established if you don't have another parent/caregiver around to deal with the otlder kid or kids more or less full time in the first few weeks. I don't think anyone on here seems judgey either about not bf or persevering with it through pain and other difficulties. Everyone needs to make the right choice for them.

I agree that pregnant women need more warning about postnatal symptoms. I've found it much easier this time knowing what to expect. DS is 11 days old now and I'm just about pain free but still can't really tense my pelvic floor or stomach muscles and I'm nowhere near fitting in non maternity trousers. That's after a fairly easy and quick birth with no tears despite him being a big baby so there's no wonder those of you with long or difficult labours are still in pain.

Sorry to hear that you're struggling with anxiety gun and me. Hope your GP/health visitors are able to provide some useful support. Until then, have you tried progressive muscular relaxation, like <a class="break-all" href="https://www.google.co.uk/url?sa=t&source=web&rct=j&ei=tA9EVIKeEbG07QbPioHYBg&url=www.anxietybc.com/sites/default/files/MuscleRelaxation.pdf&ved=0CCQQFjAA&usg=AFQjCNEFI6PyC_yaUFUV2mCguPR46QMTDw&sig2=TuHKDJ4tRVyapUB0sU8lPg" rel="nofollow" target="_blank">this? Sorry if you've already tried it, I know it can be annoying when people suggest "solutions" when you just want them to listen, but I've found that technique helpful so thought it was worth mentioning.

I've just had my first success with a stretchy wrap. DS wasn't keen at first, but soon fell asleep leaving me with both hands free to clear up after tea, very useful! DD found it very amusing when I went in to say goodnight to her, she thought I looked like a kangaroo!

Gun that must be awful - I hope you get the CBT and it helps. Dealing with a newborn is hard enough without anxiety. I hope you have real life help to give you some breathing space.

Bugger wanting time away from small shrieky demanding incontinents is utterly normal! I love my two to bits but some days I'm very happy to hand my wee man over to the childminder!

Pregnant makes a v good point there are many ways to feed babies and FF is quicker at this age, personally its probably too much faff long term - but I'm a disorganised slattern who hates washing up and likes the fact I can't forget to take my boobs out with me. But other people (especially organised folk who like routine) often benefit from FF. I don't totally agree with the happy mummy = happy baby correlation as otherwise I'd be back on 20 Marlboro lights a day and drunk under the table on sauvignon blanc but when it comes to feeding I totally agree with it. I adore BF so know to just ride out the tough first 6 weeks but when its your first time its very hard to have that trust in the process.

From 2 months on BF and FF babies sleep equally well so don't switch purely for reasons of sleep as the science doesn't back it long term. It helped me get through it first time round when I read that the light sleep of the first 2 months of BF is a natural protection against SIDS, it helped me to know there was a good reason for it beyond just torturing Mummy. This time I know sleep will be so much better in a matter of weeks so I'm just trying to get thru each day and night until then.

I don't remember the feeling as physically battered after DD1, but I had been pretty ill before I had her and the whole birth/ week after is a bit of a blur still. I do remember feeling like I had been kicked in the stomach by a carthorse after DS though, I could barely roll over in bed the second night as my stomach muscles were so sore - I asked a MW on the postnatal ward who said it was afterpains but when I saw the MW who delivered DS on a postnatal visit the week after she said it was just sore muscles from the effort.

I felt pretty sore and achy days 3-5, but that is mostly gone now - I definitely feel it when I'm on my feet a lot and notice a big increase in bleeding - I properly lazed around this morning and had nothing for a few hours.

Other than that, things are going pretty well here. I'm FF because of meds (I wish I didn't feel the need to always add the reason, you'd have thought I'd have got over it after 3 DC) so DH and I are splitting the night feeds at the moment, and to be honest DD2 is still sleeping a lot so it's not been too bad so far, she generally feeds about 10:30 and 2:30 at the moment, but by previous experience that will change!

I'm dreading DH going back to work as well though, I have no idea how I'm going to get us all up, out of the house and get DD1 to school and DS to preschool. The first week DH is back is half term though, which is a bit of a relief as at least we don't have to be anywhere.

I'm sorry to hear you're having such a hard time gun and me. We're all here for when you need us but make sure you get the right help in RL.
My news is that Etta's stump fell off today- 1 week old today. It's gone by so fast. Think she's due a growth spurt as very tearful/ clingy and feeding almost every hour. Think it's going to be a long night!!

yellow I agree with a lot of the points you make a happy mum does not make a happy baby, I would imagine that bfing in the long run is much easier and less hassle, and most of all switching to ff is not guaranteed to give you a baby that doesn't cry and sleeps better. I remember with my first when I swapped to ff she cried a lot (so did I) and struggled with tummy ache and constipation which was heartbreaking and not what I needed in my fragile state I felt so guilty.

I don't think there is an easy solution to this feeding malarkey, and everyone tells you it's the most natural thing in the world makes it all sound so easy!! Like buggery it is

Pips stump fell off yesterday, and we couldn't find it! Ended up appearing at the neck of her vest about 5 hours after we'd noticed it missing.

Similarly clingy child today. Met her cousins which was very cute but vrry loud, she doesn't seem to want to sleep. Feeding every hour for half an hour. Slightly worried about tonight ss I'm struggling with tiredness today.

I didn't want to breastfeed if you remember, but it still seems the easiest option right now. I'm not sure I could work out formula and sterilising in thissstate of vegetable-brain.

Tonight my boyf, who has been ace all eeek, id working his way through a bottle of wine and has skinned up a joint. REALLY? I had to bring Pip to bed with me before well... raaaah

Sorry to those of you going through tough times. Here's to a good night for everyone.

Frau birthday snap! Hope you had a nice day - we went it for a IB lunch and then had friends round for afternoon tea.

For a pub lunch that should say

Happy birthday guys!

We had our first day out today too. Met my family for lunch so Dylan could meet his cousins. They all loved cooing over him when he eventually woke up! He was very good in the car and slept most of the time we were out.
He's just woken up for a feed thank goodness! Took my brain off and began dripping from both boobs. Lush. I hope he's hungry!

I've got two good friends in France where virtually everyone has epidurals and FF - they don't have the daft mummy guilt we cripple ourselves with here, over perfect births and feeding. Maybe its the lack of the Daily Mail!

I love BF and whilst I'm seemingly unable to carry a baby beyond 35 weeks and can't get them out in the right position - BF is something my body does easily through no effort on my part but that isn't true for everyone. And it isn't a case of trying harder. I couldn't have delayed my waters going or happily sneeze-birthed my b2b if I'd tried harder! Some things are easier for some bodies. My nipples have never cracked or bled and my tube of lansinoh only ever gets used for nappy changes. If I had to persevere like some of you ladies are with BF - I'm not sure I'd be so brave as you are being.

V has been feeding pretty much non stop for 2.5 hours. Why won't she sleep I'm so tired!

Lilla has perfected the stink eye. Her Daddy has just changed her bum in between sides - mid feed - how very dare he! She then furiously tried to latch onto my forearm whilst giving him evils.

Our bedroom is in the eaves - you can hear wind and rain beautifully up here - its a wild one tonight! I quite like night feeds on nights like this. Even if after tanking up she's still waking every 2 hours .

Goats I'd struggle not to snap about that. Is he a lot younger? He sounds like he's got a bit of growing up to do.

V has now been awake for 5 hours and feeding for 4 of those. I hVe to be up in just over 4 hours as it's school day tomorrow

Does night 2 of breast feeding usually entail no sleep?! Still at hosp, had various suggestions from them but nothing works. He screams when put down, just wants to use me as a dummy (as only Colostrum still no milk). Can't help feeling there must be a reason but maybe not?! He was particularly windy today but during the day managed feeds every three hours and sleeps swaddled in the cot.
Am desperate

I feel your pain happy I was in the same position last week with DD. In the end I asked if a midwife could cuddle her for an hour or two so I could get some sleep. And I asked them for a bit of formula cause she was obviously starving. I had to be quite insistent with that but because my ds was on special care when he was born and was discharged from there as a bf baby who had one bottle formla a day with meds in, I felt confident that I wasn't ruining my chances of establishing bf. Or the nipple confusion thing. Might not be for you but it saved my sanity the other night, she had two tiny 10ml ff and it took the edge of her hunger.

Not lots younger, just sometimes s bit of a div. He has some odd ideas about what is reasonable gor a man pushing 40.

The other day Pip got a really good latch on my nose.

Happy ' I had the midwives take her away on my last night in hospital. She was going nuts, wouldn't feed, screaming.... they gave my 2 hours sleep then brought her back - still screaming but fully winded. This was our breakthrough eith breastfeeding - I took her into bed with me and lay down to try and feed her, she sucked away for nearly 2 hours. I was worried that she wasn't going to get much but another midwife was quite good about trying not to worry about that. Sometimes they don't feed mulch for thr girst 24 - 36 hours, so just do what you can.

Urgh growth spurt or CMPI kicking in (I'm expecting the symptoms between her due date and 1-2 weeks after)? She fed every hour last night after cluster feeding all day. And made me grateful of a two hour stint of sleep!!!! Thank gawd my wee manny is at the CMs so DH and I can get stuff ready for the GPs coming up sleep.

Happy birthday for yesterday, fatpony! We didn't leave the house, but had lots of visitors and cake and dd drew me several really sweet pictures.

happy day 2 was really hard for us too. Ds was in a lot of pain expelling the meconium, but things were a lot better the next day. It's funny how excited you can get when you see the first yellow poo!

My mw has been proved right - told me to expect a growth spurt around days 7-10 and on cue ds cluster-fed from 10pm until 3am last night. At least my engorgement has subsided and I can finally latch him well on both sides.

I can't believe it. After two nights of cluster feeding hell, Baby Badger slept properly last night. All night. I gave her a quick little feed at 2:30 but apart from that she slept from midnight until I woke her up for a change and feed ten minutes ago. Apparently she really liked being swaddled for the first time. Take heart, sleepless ladies! It can happen!!

Badger congrats. Baby M also appears to like the swaddle-he escaped the grobag company swaddle in a nano second and would escape eventually when we tried with a light flannel blanket so we ordered the Houdini proof Miracle blanket and so far no escapes! Cried first couple of times, now seems accepting of his fate...

We're just swaddling in a knitted blanket my Auntie made for him and he loves it! Keeps him snuggly!

I'm just lurking (still only 39+1) but wanted to recommend the 'Wonder Weeks' app to those of you struggling with what is normal(ish) behaviour in terms of growth spurts etc. Not necessarily for the first few weeks but after the fog has cleared a bit

I had a terrible first 6 weeks (engorgement, nipple shields, vasospasm, low milk, failure to thrive diagnosis - he dropped a lot of weight, formula and expressed milk top ups) but then everything settled down, I was able to to drop the formula and DS started to sleep, during the night at least, in regular chunks of time. Despite all the bf problems I had at the start I loved it and my son only self weaned at 2.5 years old!

Pinkie yes that app is awesome (though I found with a prem it never really fitted his behaviour regardless of using adjusted or actual age). Other pals swore by it.

Oh, and I had my son in Australia where (as another poster mentioned) everyone swaddles from birth. It did my head in to start with as my son would get out of the stretchy wraps I had but once we started using these it really helped

www.ergopouch.co.uk/swaddles.html

www.cheekyrascals.co.uk/love-to-swaddle-up-original.html