December 2011 "Mummymummymummymummy.... it's MINE!"

[NorthernChinchilla]

Combining our catchphrases...sigh...

Oh dear. I hope it doesn't ruin Christmas for you all figgy, and that your poor little boy feels better soon.

Just popping in to say happy Christmas.

Sorry to hear some are poorly.

Merry Christmas to everyone, and especially all the new thread babies that have landed this year. How're you doing seven?
And that sounds awful figs, are you going to have that parenting rite of passage and call the oooh doc on Christmas day?

Merry Christmas all!

Merry Christmas everyone

We've had a lovely day, DS hasn't quite managed to open all of his birthday and Christmas presents as he got so much and wanted to play with each present! His toy shopping till from Nanny was a big hit along with his lorry that carries cars!

Happy Boxing Day! Had a lovely Xmas day, DS was a bit crazy at his other GPs by all accounts
My poor Gran had a massize heart attack two days before Xmas though, but is still hanging on. Hope she makes the New Year.

Sorry to hear about your gran Northern hopes she gets better

We've been to panto ds fell asleep I can finally eat

Sorry to hear about your gran northern :(

Things haven't been great here. I still have depression and not coping brilliantly, me and DH are having problems too.

Sorry to hear that northern dh and I are tearing strips off each other up at my parents i would quite happily let him head home tomorrow by himself and ds and I stay here forever

Well, my Gran is still with us. Despite it being, quote, a very big heart attack, she's playing scrabble. Though discussing Do Not Resuscitate orders on Xmas Eve takes some beating Just no idea how long she's going to go on.
Really sorry to hear of the unhappiness with OHs, the time of year does not help. Is the medication not working properly seven, do u need another trip to the Docs?

Sorry to hear about your grandmother Northern, and sorry things are tough seven.

8 hour journey to get home, urgh. Bobbing into work tomorrow but then the rest of the week off for potty training larks

Forgive me for being very me, me, me but I'm going to get this off my chest before I catch up.
I've come to the thread many times, and then backed away - in embarrassment, I guess - because I am fickle and feel rather ridiculous.
The last time I posted, I was probably saying how good things were between DH and me, and how we may be beginning to fix things.
I was aware that there was bound to be rose-tinted glasses, caused by loneliness, and by being apart from Boi. But I felt that I'd learnt from what was wrong, and so could think about steps to right wrongs.
Then I went to the Christmas do at work. With DH. And late on, someone else flirted with me and showed interest. And oh how easily was my head turned.
Since then, and subsequent discussions via (Lync/communicator) our company's instant messaging software, I've obsessed about this other guy.
It had been planned that DH would spend Christmas at home. He decided to arrive earlier, on the Monday evening. I'd actually packed my overnight bag, thinking I might actually chat to the other man (OM) and organise a night at his.
(Something we had almost gone ahead with the week earlier but our consciences stopped us.)
So i didn't chat to OM, I rushed home, put my hair dryer and straighteners back in place in a panic, and put up and shut up.
I didn't go back into work.
DH spent Christmas here. But any possibility of reconciliation had been ruined. Instead, our communication reverted back to how we were before the split. If not worse.
We entertained everyone at home, and Boi loved DH being here.
Last night, DH and I talked. I just explained that I'd found Xmas very stressful (I had planned to do Xmas dinner for 10, but then my auntie's party for Christmas evening was redirected to mine. On Monday evening I found out that I'd now be catering for 10 at dinner and 16 in the evening.) So the stress had pushed us back. Him being here was too much too soon for our relationship, but fantastic as a support - he could help out and essentially keep Boi busy while I got on with everything.
Anyway, it was a sad chat last night.
Admitting that things weren't so good between us.
But at the same time, whilst this silliness with the OM is silly, it has wiped away the rosey tinted glasses. I see the flaws in our relationship. So we're back to square one. DH has gone back home tonight.
Boi will be very unhappy about this. But we'll get through it.
(I should say that nothing has happened with the OM beyond flirting about "if")
(Sorry about this long message. I wish I'd done it on my laptop to make it clearer!)
I have the OM's contact details (he's single), but I have not contacted him at all since we were both in work together.
Whether I will or not over the next week, remains to be seen.
...Boi has just woken up. Perfect timing!!

Sorry to hear some of you are having tough times.

Had a good Christmas here but now feeling absolutely gutted. My oldest friend, who emigrated to New Zealand several years ago, has been over here for a few weeks and was coming to mine for the day tomorrow, but discovered this evening that her DS (who was 3 in October) has worms. Visit cancelled. And they return to NZ Saturday . Won't see them now until either they come back to UK or we go to NZ. No idea when that might be. Feeling so sad.

X post Northern and Oi. Such a variety of ways in which we are all suffering! Sympathies all round

(Boi just stirred, was fine)
I suppose all that's left to say is that I feel relief that DH has gone home. I do feel very sorry for him.
And I did actually tell him that he'd done NOTHING to try and win me back at all (and that that was very disappointing, even then, he had no fight to give. He is pathetic. I do not want him back. It is only for Boi that I would want to fix things. It's a lot. I hate being without Boi. But I don't think it's enough. I feel sorry for DH, but life with me not loving him would be worse for DH and me. And would become obvious to Boi.)
So, my dears, I'm free.
Last night in our discussion, we talked about going back to slowly-slowly dating. ...It seemed kinder. I may have to kill that idea.
There you go. My confession.
Otherwise Christmas was great. Boi was utterly spoilt. We got him a drum kit () but didn't over do it with loads of other stuff.
However, the GPs bought him an electric car. It's awesome, but totally "spoilt" territory. And DH's family bought him scalextrics and remote control cars, and all sorts. He has got loads.
And from tomorrow, I shall be dieting and cutting out the wine.
...I need to lose weight. If I want to bag the OM (!) who is 6 yrs younger and 6'5"(!!) I need to get in shape.
I also need to become a woman again, and not just a mum, and get some decent underwear!!

Sorry about your gran Northern. I hope she's comfortable.
Seven, how're you? Depression is so unkind. No wonder your relationship is suffering. The disconnect in your head because of the depression, means that nothing else will "connect" or align. You can't see things as they are correctly, and no one will see things as you do. I have never had depression. I have a good friend who does, but all I can attempt to relate it to is the hormonal imbalance I had caused by pregnancy. I know now how overly sensitive I was, I just could not accept it then. It truly is impossible. I hope you find some relief soon with whatever meds you need to get you through this tough period.xx
Faff - why would worms come between such an important meeting/catch up!?
Oh and I forgot to say, Boi took a tumble on Xmas day and ended up in A&E having a hole in his forehead glued back together. He was ok, but we decided to err on the side of caution, I'm glad we did. He fell off the sofa, onto the corner of a table. Just 45mins before everyone was due to arrive for dinner! DH took him.
They were back within 2 hours, and 2 of the guests (an aunt and uncle) arrived 45 mins after they were told we would be having dinner(!!!!!!!!) so everything was delayed anyway.

Worms are very contagious. He wasn't sleeping last night due to the itching. She couldn't get him any medicine until tesco pharmacy opened at 8am today and she assumes it's not going to work instantly so wouldn't want to expose us all to it. Apparently they can incubate for up to three weeks so she's had to tell loads of people they've seen and stayed with on their trip over here that they'll need to take the medicine too!

Oi, well done for making the decision. Happy mummy and daddy will mean a happy boi, and if that means the two of you being apart then so be it. It's not like you've rushed into it or taken the decision lightly. Always nice to be flirted with too! Here's to a happy 2015 for all of you

I didn't know that they were that bad. That's a shame.
I forgot to mention that we had attempted enforced potty training this week. But we abandoned ship yesterday, at day 2, because Boi was absolutely refusing to cooperate and use a potty or toilet.
Far. Too. Stressful. He's just being really naughty at the minute. I think we need to put lots of the toys away.

Oi sorry to hear about your Christmas woes do you think it's over? I do think it's right that Christmas is the hardest time of the year for relationships.

DH and I have barely spoken to each other for almost a week he finds it very hard being in my family's home for any length of time because he is hyper organised and anxious and we are all unorganised and do things about LastMinute just bumbling along with life rather than making clear plans and decisions. Feels that he's just not communicated with we either basically argued the whole time or ignored each other when we up there I hate him because it's so pathetic. At one point I was going to stay there and quite happily never come back. Part of me thinks that if it wasn't for the 500 mile difference I would've done it by now but I cant take DS away from him so it makes me work harder at "us". He's gone to work tomorrow today Wednesday morning he's organised an all day thing Thursday for himself and then is back to work on Friday so won't see him all week then it's Xmas 2 at the inlaws at the weekend. He's miserable all the time I can't stand it anymore I used to ignore it but now have to ignore him. So much for trying for dc2 next month that's also making him miserable he doesn't want a 2nd he wants to quit his job work in a minimum wage job that'll make him happy with animals or fish or the like. He feels trapped by having 1 dc let alone 2 ......things not good here I am not a patient woman and quick to anger which doesn't help.

Hey ho ds is playing in the bath with his robo fish oblivious thank god

Oi we started potty training at the start of December he was done in a day with only 2 accidents since 1 wee on day 1 and 1 horrid poo. 3 weeks before that we had a horrific couple of days. We told ds that Santa needed the nappies for the Xmas babies and would bring a present it sooo worked not that I usually revert to bribery . He wanted a green airplane which turned out to be Thunderbird 2 which the childminder has at her house I asked DH to get it he seemingly couldn't be arsed so that was another thing that I ended up buying. Thankfully on Christmas morning that was exactly what ds had been looking for good on Santa

Yes, I think Christmas can be either honeymoon or nightmare for couples. Sorry about your problems with your DH. He needs a kick up the backside. Or some happy pills.
Arghh! Men!!
Ttc. Yes, we need them for that at least.

I stole your "Santa needs the nappies for other children" story...

Goodness lots going on here. Sorry your relationships are so hard Oi and figgy. Is defs true that Christmas is hard on relationships. I think it is enforced close contact over several days with in-laws and the feeling you have to be having 'fun'.

We had a nice quiet few days. Just ourselves and BIL and MIL. Got on great with MIL. She got up with Minimopsy every morning so I got a bit of a lie in til 8 or 9 even. Bliss. Mopsyboy is still only feeding once during the night. Usually 22.30-23.00ish, 3.00-4.00ish, 8.00ish. Is amazing thinking back to Minimopsy. He is dead chilled. Only upset for couple of hours in evenings with wind (but intermittently not all the time).

Glad you had a nice, peaceful time mopsy and that you got some sleep.

figgy sorry you had a rough time with OH. Christmas can be so stressful, especially when you all do things in different ways. Is he really hating his job?

northern sorry about your grandma, hope she is comfortable now.

seven big hugs.

Oi, at the end of the day, this isn't a decision you have made quickly or lightly, and you've tried and tried to find a way forward as a couple.

Christmas here was good, busy and a bit crazy, but good. Lovely to have family over, I forget how nice it is, wish we all lived closer. Things between DH and I are fine, thinking about a holiday next year, and planning a nice weekend away soon (just the two of us). I start half marathon training this week (eeek!) Feeling very fed up with work stuff but just going to make the best of it this year and coming and concentrate on how well it fits in with home life.

DS has got some serious attitude at the minute. Too much Christmas craziness, too many sweets and not enough routine. We're trying to get back to normal this week. DH needs a good helping of patience if we're going to get through Age Three in one piece, however. I'm getting a bit fed up with him basically telling DS for acting like a normal three year old. Might beat him round the head with a copy of Playful Parenting.

So here's to 2015 being better for our relationships, to little ones being angelic and lovely, and to new thread babies sleeping lots and being adorable! x