Jan 2014 - And lo' there appeared a star: Our babies start arriving!

[AnotherStitchInTime]

Hello ladies,

Thought I would start you off. We can just keep this a stats thread until we all deliver and then move across if you like.

AnotherStitchInTime Dc3 Mason Oliver born 23rd December at 9.57am, 34+5 weeks, 2.976kg.

Goodluck with your theory test Felix

Hope everyone has lovely plans on Mothers day sunday

million sounds like postnatal care is much better in France than It is here. Apart from one leaflet with all my births I didn't have a clue what having a baby did to your Fanjo, I was in for a shock with precious pfb! They don't mention much about those types of things here and not enough is spoken of sex lifes and bladder control.
I think more should be mentioned about this and how important it is.
I always do my pelvic floor exercises but I never know whether I am doing them right so might invest in one of them machines

Baby pumpkin has been an angel today and slept through my daughter's eyetest and allowed me to get some shopping before her feed. Going out to dinner with a friend tomorrow, 1st evening leaving baby, will be odd...

felix good luck for tomorrow. Paperchase is where I ended up going in the end and they only had 1 grandma card left. I've also got her a pair of Emma bridgewater mugs and a bunch of tulips from the boys. I know I should have left it to Dp but it would have come from Amazon and be ridiculously unsentimental. He suggested buying a WiFi range extender for her at Christmas.

puggle I agree, calling them mum and dad is a bit odd. You already have parents. I call dps mum and dad by their first names.

nature me too. I've bought a crock pot slow cooker. Excitement abounds in my house. I am ridiculously happy about it, have wanted a slow cooker for ages. What have you bought?

Good luck felix! You'll do great, I'm sure

puggle I'd find that odd. I already have a mom and dad. But mil thinks it's odd she doesn't get a card off the boys, she isn't their mom?! But apparently I'm weird. She thinks she should get a grandma card on mothers day.

Thank you for the good luck!

Enormouse I love love love my slow cooker and DP ended up cracking it last night because he put the crock pot directly on the stove to try and reduce the sauce from our pulled pork last night. What a douche bag! He's made up for it by having flowers and chocolates delivered today wasn't expecting it at all!

That sounds like he sent flowers for breaking my beloved slow cooker I'd be a bloody florist if he did that every time he broke something of mine!

So it's all come to a head here. We're getting a divorce. I think Henry is picking up on it as has been screaming all day and never screams. Please tell me it'll get easier and my life won't be the shit I'm imagining

Oh my god MrsV I'm so sorry I never expected that to happen. I don't really have any advice but please vent as much as you need on here as we are all listening!

Thanks enormouse, I wanted to stick the phone in some rice but DH was out and DD and N both causing trouble. Manages to open it and take the battery out ready for the hairdryer, but it was working again this morning. Was secretly disappointed, the phone is a hand me down from DH and is older than DD is. Was looking forward to 'having' to get a new one. I know what you mean about amazon, I nearly ordered my Mum a Chromecast before coming to my senses.

puggle I agree your DP is being unreasonable. It has to come from you and your PIL and is not something that can be forced! I call my PIL Mama and Baba but it is quite common in Egypt and I personaly don't think it sounds as weird in Arabic. I also lived with them without DH for almost three years, so it felt more like a parent-adult child relationship to me. I did manage to catch DH before he called DF Dad though as that woukd have sounded weird to me, and my DBs would have ripped the piss out of him forever.

Mothers' Day in Egypt was last week and I got all excited when DH said the night before "Oh, I almost forgot, it is Mothers' Day tomorrow!". Unfortunately he then went on to say we needed to call his Mum. I pointed out that I thought he meant he was going to help DD do something nice for me and he told me to talk to the baby! He now has two more chances, this Sunday, which he knows about because I showed him what I ordered for Mum, and the French one in May. Not holding my breath.

million i hope none of my relatives join! I think anyone I have ever met would know who I am.

pumpkin I am vey impressed with you having five. I feel ready for the knackers yard after two! I am lucky with the postnatal care here and planning to take full advantage. The tens machine is fine, but it is the exercises that make the difference really. You still have to do them while using the machine. Are there private midwives who offer help with pelvic floor exercises you could use? I am not sure I would have been able to do it alone, though I am unusually clumsy.

mrsv I'm so sorry. I've no personal experience but my friend went through a divorce a year after getting married and her life is a million times better now than it was.

MrsVDB I'm so sorry to hear that... Vent all you want. Like nature I have friends who divorced after less than a year if marriage in their late 20s... Both remarried and happier than they ever were together xx

Sorry to hear that, MrsV :(

I can add my voice to the "life gets a whole lot better after divorce" chorus. It really does, I promise. And it's not that hard during, either, if you both keep a level head and a civil tongue.

But I'm so happy now. I had our while life planned. I'm not sure I can continue my career as a single parent. Everything is ruined :(

mrsv sorry, I just saw your post now.

Life will not be as shit as you think, and henry probably is just picking up on tension. N screams for ages whenever I shout or lose my temper. He will be absolutely fine, just look after yourself. Is there anyone you can call to come round and keep you company or take henry while you take a breather?

If you need anything at all, just ask.

it seems like that now I am sure, but there are lots of different options for managing work and parenthood though you are right that they are not always easy. It is hard when you really want the only thing that is no longer possible.

So sorry to hear your news mrsv xx

Oh MrsV I'm so sorry. No advice, but we're always here to listen and support.

Thanks everyone. I've told my parents now (via text) so it's starting to feel very real. I'm probably going to stay with them for a bit but as Henry is so unsettled today I'm not keen on doing the 2 hour drive

I'm so sorry to hear that mrsv. I've been through a divorce and I promise that things will start to get better much sooner than you think they might. I hope your parents can give you lots of support, but in the mean time we're here if you need us.

I'm so mrsV we're here to vent/hand hold/whatever you need

Oh, MrsV that's very sad news. I'm so sorry. I do t have any additional advise from everyone else but wanted to day I'm thinking of you.
Some of our family from NI are due to arrive soon for the weekend.

Thanks for all the advise and 'me too's about the boob holding and shallow latches. It doesn't hurt and she is putting on weight so guess it's normal. Might try to find a breast feeding group to ask about fast letdown too tho as I'm sure I'm choking her sometimes!

Hope you all have good nights.

*advice
(I think!)

Sorry this is going to be an awful me me me rant but I am so pissed off. I have a history of anxiety and it comes and goes. Luckily it seemed to have lifted through pregnancy and after birth but the past week or so I can feel that anxious feeling again. DP knows I have been struggling, and I'm feeling really stressed. He went out for a drink after work for someone's leaving do and promised he would be back by 6 (bearing in mind he finished at 4 and works in town). I text him at 7 asking when he would be back as I'd start cooking tea and he replied saying he would be back at about half 9 or 10 'if that's ok?'. I told him I wasn't happy about him staying out as I haven't revised for my test tomorrow, and I really needed a break as Sylvie has been crying all day, so he said he would be back at 8. He turned up at 9 (just after S had thrown up all over me) pretending he'd hardly drank anything and fell asleep with Sylvie on the bed. I woke him up and told him he was taking the piss and he went to the loo and fell asleep there too. He's now got in bed and I'm left to make my own tea (which I was holding off, waiting for him to get in even though I'm starving) and sort out all the bottles. No time to revise and got a 10 minute cold bath. Yay for me! I could absolutely kill him right now!!!! My test is at 8 so I've got to get up at ready to leave for around 7 and I know for a fact he won't wake up in the morning so I'll have to get both Sylvie and me ready in time. Arghhhhh I don't even care that he sent me flowers anymore. Stupid bastard

MrsV I'm so sorry to hear that. I wish I could give you a massive hug. Only personal experience is my parents' divorce; they did okay, are still in fairly close contact, and amicable (DM arranged DF's 60th birthday, for example!). It can be done. If that's what you want. Lots of love to you.

felix your DP is being a cuntpuffin. He needs to apologise, and make it up to you. Very unfair of him.

Having a bit of a rotten time here, no specific reason, so feel like a total fraud, but I am feeling very worn and tearful all the time, not able to get perspective and see that A is actually less screamy, just reacting to her crying as if it's a personal attack etc.

Intellectually I know it's communication; when it starts, my muscles tense up, and I get all clenchy and hot, and when it goes on for ages, I can't seem to stop the anger boiling up inside. It's not even anger, really, it's fear I'm doing something wrong, but I can't seem to get past it. DH is amazingly supportive, but I don't think I've had a day without weeping on him in the past ten weeks. Make that 12, because I cried every day I was overdue....
I keep feeling like the world has narrowed in so much, and when she cries I get all catastrophizing, thinking things like 'if you can't learn to stop crying, I will NEVER be able to go out again' etc. So silly. Sometimes it's like she knows I want to get out of the house by a specific time, and cries deliberately to stop me (her crying is not whinging you can ignore, it's full on bloodcurdling howls. I know it's seriously loud, as I asked my NCT group to be honest, and they admitted she is much louder than the other babies ). I do know that's not true, but it doesn't stop me bursting into tears and stomping around when she does it though.

Sorry for me me me post.

felix, he is a fucker.

Honestly, all these wanker men make me so cross on your behalfs (behalves?). They need rounding up and setting straight. Please let me do it!

Humpty, do you know why she's crying? When M does this, I run through the usual checklist (clean, dry, warm, not too warm, fed etc) and then go out anyway. It's hard, isn't it?
I'm sorry you're having a tough time. It might be worth a quick word with your HV, if you have a good one. She won't judge you, or think badly of you. She probably hears this every day and might have some good advice for you.

Felix Men grrr they can be complete arses at times, I wouldn't be happy either!
Hope he gets off his beehind today & bloody helps you out with sylvie after your test!
Hope you get a well earned rest

Humpty I sympathise completely, my second born was a very cryey baby and it makes you feel so alone and desperate doesn't it. I really wish I had asked for help instead of coping alone as it would have really helped us.
Ask your hv for advice and speak to a friend.
I remember very much some days when she didn't stop crying at all, in the pram, in her cot, I even bought her a swing which she completely hated lol. There was light at the end of the tunnel, by 6 months life was easier and her crying became less.
I think she had very bad colic now when I look back.
There was just no soothing her, I used to have panic attacks and call dh home from work.
Baby massage may be good too, did a course with dd3 at surestart many years ago and have done it with dd4 and they were amazingly contented afterwards and settled into sleep beautifully. Going to do same with baby pumpkin once she is 12 weeks, even if I cant get to a course I remember most of it to start on my own
Hope things get better numpty