November 2012 - The birthdays are coming thick and fast

[StuntedFrankenNun]

Previous thread: www.mumsnet.com/Talk/postnatal_clubs/1884788-November-2012-Babies-going-trick-or-treating

Not sure we can afford a villa. For some reason all inclusive looks cheaper. Will study in detail though would have to be last minute due to current circumstances

Read it Eliza

Ahh yes, being girly. I am pretty girly. Wear make up every day and like pretty things.

Oh! And I meant to say that I love desigual stuff. There was a shop which sold loads of the stuff much cheaper than here when DH and I were on honeymoon. He told me to buy stuff but I didn't. Meh. I really like the Mela Loves London concession that you get in New look and Debenhams. Lots of nice frocks with slightly different prints. Anything with cats on or owls is obviously a goer. Not cartoony though. Not a fan of that.

Just been reminded that we were supposed to be at a memorial do tonight for a school friends of DH's who died of cancer two years ago. We can't go because MIL has a horrendous chest infection and we would be staying with them. Last years one was awful so I am only a tiny bit sorry that we aren't there - lots of competitive mourning while his bereaved fiance was ignored

Fuck. I have been reading the comments about emotions being high as it approaches our babies' first birthdays but haven't really identified with them until now. Have just seen a picture of a newborn baby all cuddled up with him mummy and burst into tears. I think it is because it is November now and feels like it did this time last year. But it brought back memories of snuggling with Oscar, still being with XP and all the family and in laws coming round to visit. That was my family. And it makes me really sad that I don't have that anymore.

Chasing that's bad, but it's his loss.
det work never changes does it?

P has been nice all last night and today, but he does have a lovely migraine :) :) he thought my mum was crazy when she feed him ice cream when his throat was sore.

Why can't he be like this all the time???
Grr...... It's days like this where I think I'm crazy. Speaking of which I need to see my GP and she if she thinks I'm being emotionally abused. If so then I can get free legal aid.

Ahhhhhh.......
Evil

pr I like desigual. I have a summer dress. Generally I am girly and until recently have been very much dress orientated but I have been wondering if my dresses are too young for me now, or, am I looking a bit mutton. I like Mela Loves Lond Etc too. So I have been leaning towards dark smart jeans, straight or skinny with nice tops, white company and Mint velvet, lr a polo neck with scarf. Until I can get back into my dress vibe.

Make up every day. Check.
Pretty things. Check.

gt hugs. Sounds rubbish living with ILs, especially ones so rood.

Blowing a gale outside. Cosy inside. Discovered putting pjs on fire guard in front of wood burner before bed.

Agh where have all these feelings come from?! I miss being a family. I thought I was set. I thought I had my family. Now I have to be the whole family for Oscar and I don't feel that I can do that alone. I feel lost

You are not crazy evil

Would love to take a trip to haggisland but tenerife cheaper in February and warmer

We are hoping to go to the uk in 2015 and depending on budget would like to incorporate an actual holiday into our trip. DH loves Scotland in fact he has a jobsearch mail alert set up as he wants to move there, along with Singapore and somewhere else, Dubai I think over my dead body

pass I don't do funerals or memorials. I prefer to remember people in my own way. I dialled into my dad's funeral from work. Not because I couldn't get time off - just didn't feel the need to actually be there. I'll go to my own.

of gale blowing.

chasing you and O are a family. A secure unit. Many would be envious. Try not to miss what was and would have been so unsettling and scary. You'll add to your family over time but right now you are in a great place, secure in each other.

I wear jeans and a v neck every day. Skinny or bootleg and various shades of blue and green for the top. Need to update my wardrobe.

chasing

I had a scary coughing fit at the bottom of a5m pool midway through flooding my mask - not to self, dont dive with a throat infection I've also buggered my bad knee somehow. still have my fingers in my ears about needing a knee replacement in my eqrly twenties

I am a rubbish excuse for a girl but I try . I need a new wardrobe for my new job. Suggestions for office chic greatly appreciated

Am home in bed from a hen do. L and I both still poorly. Am bored of illness.

I will get to catch up at some point. Love and birthday wishes to all xxx

In a strop.
Complicated situation. But mil said I should come home to spend Diwali with the family. She called my mum to say this. Then said gt can go bk to there if she wants.
So Fh came to get me n I hadn't packed all my stuff, as I thought I'd go back to my mums just for a few days(sis has taken time off n now my 5week curfew is over we had planned on lots of trips out with the kids)
Anyway mil has said my mum misunderstood. She never said I should go back.
Now I know I'm not a 5 year old. Being passed between parents like a custody battle. But this is my life , I shit you not.

My mum is understandably upset. However she has told my sister that she is not to visit me here. And that she won't be coming here either.

I know I am not being unreasonable in being pissed off at my mum. She is basically punishing ME by not coming here. By not helping me out. My mil won't give a shit or even notice that my mum n sis are not coming over. I'm the only one missing out.

Argh mil just told me I should make sure I feed A well during his last feed of the night so he sleeps well. No shit Sherlock.

Sry for the verbal Puk. And I know it's a difficult situation for you to understand. I just need to vent.

Sounds shit gt

Pumpkin I would go for dresses. Nice n easy. No need to worry about matching up tops n bottoms.
Some nice cardigans. Boots for cold weather/ can't be bothered to shave legs days. Pumps for dry days.
When you buy shoes or a bag ensure you know what outfits they will go with. As otherwise you will end up with a cupboard full like I have.

My personal tip I always buy dresses in jersey material as its a lil more forgiving for weight fluctuations. Haha

GT sorry but that sounds rubbish. You do have a choice in this you know. I don't have any advice other than you don't have to be ruled by your ils and parents. Your situation sucks and I hope that you know that we are here.

GT being treated like a child is infuriating to actual children. You are not a child how soon till circumstances mean you can move out? It must be so hard reconciling your traditions to a liberal, relatively disparate society. I try very hard to get some Jamaican stuff into R's life but that is basically cooking different food and singing Bob Marley at him which I'd have done anyway

Another one in skinnies or leggings with tee shirts or tunic-length tops. Everything i own is either several years old, a size too big and bought in a supermarket saggy, maternity or breastfeeding accessible.

PR it sucks. Totally sucks. Feels like I am a kid. And I know I get treated like a kid. I have students who have more freedom then I do.

Oh gosh that sentence is depressing.

FH just told mil that H wakes at 7, n how she should prep his milk. Ie she should sort him out.
Lets see if it happens.

Pp - do you have a mitten crochet pattern you would recommend?

Also someone made muffins... With veggies? Or something like that? Or carrot muffins.

Basically H likes being fed finger food rather then spoon fed. Think it's because he watches us eating roti/chapati?
Getting bored of giving chapati n bread. So thought I'd make these muffins I've heard of on the thread.

Pp could u believe we are not here due to circumstance. We own a house. We both have good jobs and finically can afford to move out.

However it's tradition that is keeping us here. N as PIL get older its harder for us to move out. More so now after fil heart op and subsequent complications. We have a duty to look after our elders and stay with them. Yes there is deff resentment in my tone.

Your elders sound perfectly independent to me. And iirc there are other siblings who can chip in with the help?

Maybe one day ill tell you all the crazy stories about her. When we meet. Or I'll write a book. A fictional story of a gorgeous girl n how her nuts mil tries to sabotage her life

Another bad night, with reassurance that yes, J does indeed have reflux. We ran out of Omeprazole for a day (as DH threw the packet away) and he was the best he has been for months. Once it's effect had worn off we had a stark reminder of the reality of the situation.

GT sounds like a nightmare which isn't going to improve if it is going to have to stay the same. Can you not move to your house with the proviso that they can move in with you later? At least they'd be in your house , not other way around? Sorry if that's not allowed. You're so tolerant.

VQ sorry to read of another crap night. Hugs. You manage so incredibly well.

sophia the way you dress sounds really lovely. I am another really crap girl. I v rarely wear make up, I'm incapable if looking well put together, my hair is usually left to be wild curls. During the week at work I usually have a skirt, top, cardy ensemble, always with flats at the mo because of toes. I only wear a suit if I have court or a v serious meeting. At weekends I am in casual jeans plus tshirt. My DSis has the same generously proportioned build as me and has gorgeous clothes, beautifully done hair and make up, looks the best version if herself all the time. I would like to acquire some of the ability to do this.

lily I like to read too but much less than pre-DC, where I'd get through 2-3 a week. I do speed read old favourites for comfort too. Am also reading the 100 year old man book like sophia or possibly eliza mentioned (on phone so can't scroll. back, sorry). I've struggled to have time to get into things like Wolf Hall which is my kind of fiction so have been going for easier reads. I adore an author called Douglas Kennedy, he's worth looking up IMHO. I also love Laurie Graham (The Unfortunates and The Future Homemakers of America being fab). The Guernsay Literary Potato Peel Society (forgot the author) is lovely. I love recommendations too

We had a fab day for S's birthday. Made a very shite but filled-with-love rocket cake. Baked a sponge using a loaf tin, cut one end to make the rocket top. Then baked a Victoria sponge sandwich , and used 2 quarters for the wings and did something at the bottom to try and make it look rocket like. Smothered in blue buttercream icing (I don't like that sugar paste stuff). Blue cos S has a big blue rocket in his room. It was not fantastic (DSis asked if it was a blue Xmas tree) but it tasted alright and we did a candle and the song and S liked it. When we get to the party age we'll have to commission something that looks like it is supposed to but I liked it! Haha.

PIL popped in to see S in the morning and My DSis and her DP came down as planned but as a surprise they brought my mum too! So that was fab. DSis and her DP and DH and I went out for v nice dinner while my mum babysat. They're around until midday so we're about to have a big brunch.

Thanks for the birthday wishes for S. He didn't have a scooby but we had a nice day. I feel like we have survived the first, hard year, and that is worth celebrating. I think we may have had a first word yesterday too - "yeah" in context. But mainly still incoherent babbling.

Yes, sorry, i meant cultural circs rather than financial is there a certain amount of time you're expected to stay? And as PR says, why does it all fall to you guys?