November 2012 - The new quiche sleepy dust crop-sprayer plane seems to be working

[StuntNun]

Previous thread: www.mumsnet.com/Talk/postnatal_clubs/1725957-November-2012-Poor-sleep-deprived-mummies-and-daddy

Those munchkin things would be fucking hard to clean.

Just one bf today at bedtime as I needed him asleep as his little shit of a sister was being extra shitty. Caught her squeezing under the baby gate. She had got as far as her head and got stuck. She is beyond a joke and drives me insane, but I love her so much my heart almost bursts.

Night night all x

Those munchkin things would be fucking hard to clean.

Just one bf today at bedtime as I needed him asleep as his little shit of a sister was being extra shitty. Caught her squeezing under the baby gate. She had got as far as her head and got stuck. She is beyond a joke and drives me insane, but I love her so much my heart almost bursts.

Night night all x

Fucking app. Sorry.

Well of course detective, you can't prepare for a completely different baby, but what I meant was that the things I absolutely agonised over for DD like not enjoying bf'ing, choosing to mix feed, moving to fully ff, when to wean, where she slept, imposing a routine for my benefit, starting nursery and the effects on her etc, were all gone when it came to DS. He is different and it is still hard, but I have more confidence in myself. With DD it took me a while to actually accept that any passing stranger was not, in fact, more qualified to make decisions in her best interest.

I totally get that madame ds is my first and even last week when his feeding was awful I said to my mum 'well, if he were my baby I'd..' and then stopped myself, realising what I'd just said. Some days I am supermum and know what my baby needs. Most days I agonise over everything because I am convinced I must be doing it wrong

I think for me it is an age thing. Plus access to the internet!

I definitely worried less with DS1. I just got on with it I suppose? I didn't know any different, didn't have groups to share ideas on, very little in the way of socialising, no friends well not with babies at 17! and no baby groups to go to. It was all gut instinct. Apart from being a whinger, he was easy in other aspects such as sleeping and feeding. It is funny how since I have had O, my memory about DS1's baby years has seriously faded!

I did not worry one iota at putting him with a childminder at 6 months. I didn't worry about how I fed him. I didn't worry about any of it.

This time. Worry fucking worry worry worry! Arghhhh!

I've got it all the wrong way round!

I suppose I am actually more relaxed though, as I did worry what people would think about me, with being young. I always made sure we were both immaculately turned out, clean etc. To the point I was buying new buggies every 3 months when they got a bit dirty or scratched. Shoes, I was obsessive with not letting them get dirty. No dirty face, covered everything when eating so mess didn't get on stuff. I was quite strict with him really, in terms of behaviour. Not a good place to be in, but done with the best of intentions.

I could be like that this time, except, I no longer give a shiny shit what people think of me! The benefit of age I guess!

DS1 used to be my entire world. I lived for him. Everything I did was for him. I did my midwifery training to give him a better life. I bought a house against my better judgement, purely to give him stability in his home/school life.

Literally, my whole life leading up to having O - who was also for him to have a sibling as he desperately wanted - has been for him.

So I did worry about things. But now I just feel content?! I don't feel the same about DS1 as I did when he was younger, but it isn't less love, just less of a drive to need to create the perfect life for him. It is like a plateau almost. I've reached the top of where I can be, and this is life now!

For 11 years I wanted to be where I am now. I have 2 children. A career. A home. A car. Ignores previous whinge and the fact that they all fucking break. And a DP who loves me, and who I love, and can see myself spending the rest of my life with.

Life feels good. Ignores fanjo.

I just cried because I can't remember a lot of things from DS1's baby years! WTF! I'm going to start writing things down for O.

Get a grip woman! Can someone pass me a grip, please?!

Detective every time I do a PF exercise I think of you.

I'm sore when I do them. But got to stick to it.

Erm. I hate to say it. But can someone pls hurry up n join me on the pg wagon?

Kindly, you can so fuck off GT . I would fucking cry if I was pregnant!!!!!

So, no. Not here!

Shall we have a guess who will be next?! Chunky? How about you ?!

Also, thinking of me when doing your PF?! I think you're supposed to think about shagging some fit bloke or something. Not that I'd do such a thing. Ever.

I actually wrote Liam Neeson instead of fit bloke. Then I wondered how old he was. I googled. I crapped myself. 60. Are you FUCKING kidding?!! Now mortified.

I'm with Det I'm afraid GT I want longer to get to know Jonas before having another. Sorry hon! I'd keel over if I fell pregnant any time this year I think.

Oh and where the f*ck has this new midnight feed appeared from!!!! grrrr

Fine. Ill let the lot of u off so u can all have ur perfect two year gaps :p

Looking at the graph again think LO is actually on 98th rather then 91st percentile line. So deff a giant baby. But you know what. He is tall! Will measure him tomorrow. N he looks cute. And in proportion. An has recently dropped 3am feed without increasing day time. So I'm not going to worry much . Will just do more play time to mk him more active.

Cold feels better today. Still a cough tho which triggered extream puking twice today love it lol. But wana stay at my mums longer so cough cough sniffle sniffle.

Oh the stories I could tell of my dh and his laziness I'm the lazy dh

Oh the stories I could tell of getting broody get lost

Oh the stories I could tell of people asking if they are good babies of course they are, they are fucking awesome. Easy? no, but there are harder

gives up and takes chasing out for a pint

Perfect 2 year gap?

Broody?

Thinking of detective while doing pf

2 bloody hours between feeds!

Just checked DHs bank account and no money has gone in from his old company. That means the dodgy fuckers haven't paid him his weeks wage in lieu of notice or his holiday he's entitled to for the year to date. Bastards. What do we do now?! Knew something wasn't right when they sent his last wage slip and p45 but thought we'd wait another week just incase. Should he just ring and say oi where's my money or speak to someone official first?

I certainly didn't bond with O straight away. I was shell shocked after the birth and didn't eat or sleep for the two days I was in hospital after the birth. I broke down in tears numerous times in front of the nurses because I had never even held a baby before and was terrified of breaking him.

When he was 5 days old we took him out and my stepmum was pushing him in his pram - I suddenly felt this overwhelming mama bear instinct and I knew then that it would be ok.

I feel now that we are almost telepathically linked - I know what he is thinking. He isn't just part of me, he is me. I would die for him in a heartbeat.

I feel like my whole life has been leading up to being O's mummy. I realise now how meaningless my life was before.

Since being on the antidepressants my feelings for him have intensified, I think they have perhaps cleared my mind enough to allow me to feel what has always been there.

I worry a lot about how I could possibly love a second baby as much, but I hopefully won't feel as shell shocked and overwhelmed which should help the bonding process.

Oops epic post there. 3am does some funny things to you.

I'm awake. Ds just woke me by talking to the stupid frog on his stupid rainforest mobile. If it weren't so adorable i'd cry. As it is I've been Z bad mummy and changed his sopping scratch mitts and stuck his dummy in. I hope he gets the hint, there are other times of the day to be cute, child!

Broodiness.... Erm... With my mum expecting soon I guess I am a bit, but at the same time currently nothing on this earth indicates to me that I would be capable of such amazing things. You need super powers for multiple small people. Won't contemplate it for a good while yet if at all

Luis throw in some pork scratchings too if you're buying.
Detective have you been given any painkillers? I love hearing how you have built such a good life for yourself. My new life motto: WWDD?

Fatima get on to ACAS in the morning for advice.

Dp had a lovely evening with him till 9 when he woke up howling. Had to give him formula as run out of ebm shouldn't have wasted so much then but then he went down at 11 and woke just before 4

Up at 5am for the day. I caught a faint whiff of poo when DS woke at 3am and came in with me. But he went back to sleep and I must have done too even as I was debating with myself whether to change him. Dried on poo. Lovely.

Morning all. I really have to try and get to the Dr today. Ow.

LO needed her dummy several times during the night but got up at 6

I worried about bonding a lot. I desperately wanted to have a little girl as I knew that a boy would take after him and I just couldn't imagine seeing 'his' face all the time. It was silly really not to mention that even though she is a girl she is a spitting image of him but when I heard O was a girl, I burst into tears. Bonding didn't start till week 32 when I saw her on the scan sucking her thumb, licking the cord. When she was born i felt this overwhelming worry inside me, just wanted her to be a happy baby. She cried for the first 19 weeks constantly, she was stressed and so unhappy if I wasn't holding her. But it's over now, she is cheerful, funny, sweet, kissable and I love her to bits. I loved her when she was born, I am so lucky to have her.

I am also very broody. But I think it's mainly because I know I might only have her. I am 1 of 4 and want O to have siblings. Will I meet someone? Will I have another one? I trully hope so. I am not ready and not thinking about this but I still hope.

Enough said.

On a good note my little girl is still sleeping. She had a dream feed at 11.