March 2013- here we go....

[Oodsigma]

Welcome old & new to the other side!

I'll start with a stats list!

Ood -ds 7/3/13, dc4! Elcs

If anyone wants to add any more details feel free!

I meant to say I cannot believe there is anything left in either breast and she really needs to nap.

After I last posted I really thought DD was falling asleep on me finally. But no, she woke up again. My nipples are bruised! There will be no last feed tonight - I won't be waking her up once she goes asleep (will she ever go to sleep?!) as this is the time I'd normally be thinking of waking her anyway for the last feed of the evening

She's still going... :(

Hello all of you reluctantly nocturnal ladies. Just wanted to briefly explain absence. Had a melt down basically. Felt like all things conspiring against me. Got some perspective now, for now, but it's tough mentally this mummy business isn't it? Such conflicting feelings? Maybe it's just me! Such deep and fierce love for the baby you made but frustration at not understanding the right thing to do and a feeling of claustrophobia when you are no longer an 'I' but now a 'we'. Am used to taking solo time to retreat from world and be quiet but that's so hard to find now.
Anyhow, I'll catch up with all of your goings on and get back on it soon. Hope the formula/sleep/thrush/not feeding. problems of a few days ago are improving for you all.
Night night x

Jeez Wing, that's a mega feed! I haven't had one that long for quite a while. You ok? Got the Lansinoh at the ready?

Eco it's really tough isn't it. I found the first few weeks pretty bleak but am feeling better now. Do still feel a bit claustrophobic sometimes & had a huge meltdown when she started refusing the bottle because of the fear of not being able to leave her for a few hours if I needed to. We're working on reinstating a bottle a day so that at weekends I can sneak off for a couple of hours to myself to keep me sane. Really looking forward to that (as long as she plays ball)! It's certainly not just you feeling like it, there's been plenty of tears shed in this house too!

First full waking and therefore first feeding of the night here (since bed at 10.30) so not so bad. It's the next one that usually comes around quickly but fingers crossed!

It seems my last post got eaten, so sorry for not name checking or responding to everyone. Hope all going better anyway.

Wing, growth spurt? Is she really feeding or just comfort sucking? Would a bedtime routine and a finger to suck for a bit send her off if the latter? We don't have dummies and I don't think you've mentioned them...?

Think we developed reflux yesterday, poss on the back of DH doing a night feed and giving 150mls formula in under 15 mins... He rarely takes over 80 at a time (it is top up usually) and I wind after every 20-30 mls. Have a feeling this coincided with the 6 week growth spurt making for a hungry baby as well him being very windy at the mo - farting like a good un and obv uncomfortable with that. Plus we haven't seen a good bowel movement for days... Nothing hard coming out, just no more than the tiniest of skid marks which makes me suspect a degree of constipation too - really not sure how best to tackle all of this together!

Baby Whisperer and Nhs and nct all recommend tilting cot or Moses basket for reflux which we finally did at bedtime and it finally calmed him for sleep ( he went down at 22.10 and woke20 mins ago) but how do you stop them slipping down into a crumpled heap atthe bottom? He is swaddled, do I need prop blankets on either side? Anyone else tried this successfully?

I do so hate seeing him in pain.

Eco, sorry you've been feeling down. Even once the baby blues cleared I had a couple of weeks when discussing his feeding and weight gain ( both of which have been a struggle) could send me over the edge even when otherwise seeming ok. Hang I there, you're doing great.

Argh. Insomnia. Why?!

And she's up....less than 90mins since last feed. Urgh.

Still up SoYo?

Yes it was insane yesterday. Looking back at the list of feeds, she didn't go longer than a 20-25 min break between feeds from 2:15 till 10:30

I don't know if it was comfort sucking but from what I've read it does fit with a growth spurt and they can happen at 4weeks, not just 6.

Anyway, she went 10:30-4:15 so I feel vaguely human (and probably too awake) right now! SoYo, DD sounds like yours in that the feeds come closer together after this first longer stretch of sleep.

eco I had baby blues that lasted two months with DS (never diagnosed as PND ) and it's completely normal to withdraw. If you can't talk anywhere else, you know you can tell us or if that's too public still, feel free to PM me.

Right, onwards with this feed.

Wing that's exactly what MiniYo's growth spurts were like, crazy feeding during the day but more sleep than usual at night. She had hers at 5 weeks so sure they can happen at 4 weeks too.

She did 5 till 7 so that's like a normal waking up time!

SoYo I can handle the extra feeds if she's going to sleep more too :)

Hope you've all had good nights?

Bah, last post got eaten.

Wing the baby had a great night. I had insomnia. Of all the things one doesn't need with a baby in the house!

pud we propped the Moses mattress up with a towel. Fairly rapidly the weight of her head meant there was an indentation in the mattress, which mostly kept her in place. Don't know what to suggest really though, as DD rapidly got over not liking being flat on her back. Re: constipation, could you get a bit of cooled boiled water down him? Extra fluids tend to help.

eco we all have meltdowns from time to time, I think. It's a hell of a shift in your life to get your head round, and the smallest thing going wrong can seem like an utter disaster. Things will get better, and in the meantime we're all here to talk to. As far as me-time goes, how are you doing in terms of routine? I've found it's immensely helpful putting DD upstairs for naps, because even when she's doing her usual trick of waking up after 45 minutes, that's 45 minutes in which I don't have to worry about her, and I can get on with doing things for me. Getting a reasonably early bedtime routine sorted has really helped too - once she's in bed and asleep I can breathe easy because it's plain sailing until morning.

Yes sorry I didn't namecheck you when I posted! I assumed it was baby-feed related insomnia as I tend to lie wide awake for a while after putting DD down in the night.

I went to bed at 9.30, just couldn't really sleep. Managed to doze off a couple of times but was wide awake for the 3am feed. Eventually got a couple more hours on the sofa. The man's snoring really does not help, and I daren't wear earplugs in case I don't hear the baby. Who's just woken up. Must dash!

eco like others have said, we're all here to talk. Hope you feel better soon - I'm still proud of you for coping with your nightmare day!

wing how are the feeds today? You must feel so drained!

Stormy how's the reflux?

We had more tears here yesterday. I almost kicked the cat in a rage, cried because the baby pooed just five minutes after I'd sat down, and had my first cigarette in 11 months. Well, 4 drags before I coughed up a lung DP finally seems to realise that I'm ever so slightly frazzled. He suggested venturing out to mother and baby groups, which nearly earned him a slap. SoYo I totally get what you mean by claustrophobic but normal to withdraw. I'm not even breast feeding, I really don't know how you ladies cope.

Completely splurged on an expensive travel cot that we can't afford at all. Oops!

plonko I'm currently wondering if our eating issues are actually mostly due to the thrush. Although I still think she gets reflux sometimes too (because really, milk out the nose, that's not normal baby feeding behaviour). Her mouth's obviously still hurting during some feeds, but there's been a massive improvement the past couple of days. Rang the doctor this morning and they've done a prescription for daktarin and canesten (for the associated nappy rash) which my dad's picking up for me later this afternoon. It's a massive relief though, knowing what the problem is and that we can sort it out. I have hopes that one day soon she might drink more than four ounces in one go, but of course this will require me to actually make a bigger bottle. We're waiting for now to see if she'll start regularly downing the full four, and when she does we'll switch to making five ounces a time.

I'd give you a stern face and a waggy finger for the smoking but it would be massively hypocritical, as I am about to go and have a fag myself. No point beating yourself up over it though - I'm sure you already know it's a bad idea in the long run to start the habit again, but motherhood can be quite ridiculously stressful. If the odd one keeps you sane then go for it.

Stormy, I think it is the thrush as I am having similar issues. It can cause a bit of reflux but I think in my case it is a symptom of the thrush problem rather than the other way around. I thnk the dakarin is working better than th nystan tin did and you put in less of it so don't feel it is like pumping the baby full of yellow yuck! We had an awful bedtime here ( awake from 5 til 10 pm but went down after 10 pm ( exhausted) st 10.30 and slept til 3.30' had a 15 min feed asleep and then up a 7.15. Just need to work more on bedtime hour .......

I am also managing a boob one feed, formula the next strategy and just expressing and dumping it in between if I have too. This is definitely helping the nipple thrush! How pleasant, my sister had to google wha I said I had as she thought I was taking the mimic! Or had got confused! Nope it really exists....

Wing I got my inspiration for diy mobiles from here this website - howwemontessori.typepad.com/how-we-montessori/infant-mobiles/. There are links to instructions throughout that page. We bought this stand to use for our mobiles - www.amazon.co.uk/Niermann-Standby-3499-Mobileholder-Germany/dp/B000Z6VSSC/ref=sr_1_4?s=baby&ie=UTF8&qid=1367249459&sr=1-4&keywords=Niermann+Standby. Its a great stand as you can move it around the house and attach it to all sorts of furniture. It also means you can regularly change the mobile to keep baby interested and support development.

I packed away all bottles, my pump and steriliser today - was such a great feeling! I have been exclusively breastfeeding for a couple of weeks now but didn't feel brave enough to admit that all was going well in case I jinxed it! Can't believe that just 5 weeks ago, I was in absolute agony breastfeeding - the worst pain I have ever experienced and now its the best thing ever. I am hoping I won't need to express and bottle feed again for a long time - I found expressing such a pain even though I had lots of milk so sympathise with all of you still expressing on a daily basis (although expressing was the only things that made breastfeeding possible in those early days). Next hurdle is getting 100% comfortable feeding in any public place!

Stormy I hope it is just the thrush causing issues. Must be so stressful for you. Hope the new medicines work better and Zoë starts taking big bottles. I think we're going to be looking at hungry baby formula in a month or two if George keeps on at this rate - we really do seem to have opposite babies.

I gave DP the cigarette after my choking session, so it really was just a few drags. I felt bad afterwards but it did calm my rather frayed nerves. Tasted rank too, hopefully enough to deter me for good!

Have figured out that its easiest to clip a baby's nails when they're feeding. Not so easy if you're breast feeding unless you've got someone to help, but works like a charm when they're on the bottle. I'm considered today a success on that basis alone.

For some reason I've hit a wall this evening & just stopped coping. No more tired than normal & no big bad events. Bubba's been quite whingy today & the dogs been quite barky & it got to about 5pm & I just couldn't placate either of them. Really wanted DH to come home but as usual he was supposed to finish at 5 but was running late (finished at 6.30). I decided fresh air was necessary so took bubs & pup to the park but just cried while walking them around. Got home & just kept stuffing bubba on the boob in the hope of keeping her quiet. When DH got home he sent me to bed with tea & a book & I feel much better but it took me by surprise how quickly it came on me & how awful I felt, just when everything's been so much better for a couple of weeks. Boo.

Oh SoYo, hugs (which I gather for some stupid reason is un mumsnetty) I know just what you mean. I call it 'running out of cope'. So far generally so good, but I had a little snivel the other evening and it wasn't especially bad at all. Think it's when you have the realisation that you're never going to get away from the worry/responsibility thing ever again, and that weighs on the little thing to make it rather bigger. Expect you'll get a smile tomorrow and it'll all seem worth it again.

I have mostly breastfed LO today as he seems less gassy and refluxy than with the bottle. Think supply can cope, as am struggling against engorgement and leakage issues quite a lot. Have also not taken any Domperidone today, am really hoping that my supply has been kick started and won't now drop. Am expressing 2.5 ounces a go at the moment, which seems ok.

6 week check with gp tomorrow and my first haircut (and more importantly colour!) since before the birth.

Hello all. Still not caught up with your posts but a few things I wanted to say.
Stormy I have the same night = ok and day = nightmare on the lack of naps front. Drives me bonkers because it'd be so nice to be able to do something other than baby jiggle during day. Let me know if you have any progress...
All those thrush ladies who have been told fresh air to boobs might help have you tried nipple shells? They keep your bra away from your nipple for a while so thought it might help.
After initial success with bottle we're on no go now. Someone suggested today that the flow on the number one teat might be frustratingly slow which makes sense as my squirting let down suggests she normally gets a good amount. Might therefore try the next teat up. Wonder if that'll help any others of you struggling with getting them to take bottle.
There was something else but my addled brain can't remember what it was.
thanks all for words of encouragement. I think my insanity-o-meter will register increased levels as the week days roll on. After good dose of support from dh at weekend things seem ok ish but by Thursday eve I'll be desperate for some respite.
Right, ewan is lulling me back to sleep now. Dd doesn't care much for him but I'm hooked!

SoYo I hope you're not suffering from insomnia tonight and are getting some rest? A decent night with a couple of good stretches will really help. Even though your DH was late home from work, that was decent of him to order you to bed.

I agree with what pud said too that sometimes the enormity of the whole thing (nd the fact it's irreversible) and that can be overwhelming. But you have to keep plugging away and take each day as it comes and soon you'll have made it to summer, then Christmas, then your baby's first birthday and it will have rushed by :) I know it won't seem like that now though.

plonko step AWAY from the fags (And you too stormy!) I gave up a few years back and the thought of having one now makes me feel ill

Cross post eco!

Any chance you could get some help in the week if your DH can't? Is he away or something?

Take care and keep posting