May 2004 babies - new thread

[helsy]

Well, d'you think anyone will bother?
I feel like I'm having a party and waiting for people to turn up. Dorito, anyone?

I'd be interested in how you went about it, Bozza, once you have started. I have no idea how to Potty train. I'm looking out for one of Cod's boot camp threads, or a book. DS is definately ready now though. He has started announcing he's going to do a wee wee when his nappy comes off and then he squats to do one. A few times after this has happened we have ignored the wee wee and asked him if he wants to try in his potty and he's managed to do a bit more. We're going to try once things have really settled down with DS2, which won't be too long.

DS finally went bump out of his cot today (and it hurt a lot) so it's off to sort out the 'big boys bed' tomorrow and then his birthday on Sunday. Should be a good weekend. They are so grown up now, which is both and .

Egypt, are you O.K? You normally post so regularly. Happy birthday to DD for Sunday. I remember that it's the same day as my DS.

Hi,
It was DD's birthday yesterday. We were meant to go to the zoo but it was rained off so instead I rushed to ASDA to get some food for a teddy bears party.

Weve tried potty training but it was a no goer. She cries when she does a wee or poo and makes you change her nappy straight away but shell only sit on a potty with a nappy on. Therefore Ive just given up attempting it.

Anyone else fed up of the constant questions? all I get all day is ' whats daddy doing/saying? ' whats the lady doing? 'whats that? I get this every 2 seconds even though ive answered it. The drive home from my parents today went like this;
' Whats daddy doing?
' I dont know, daddy's at home'
' whats daddy saying?
' I dont know daddy isnt saying anything, hes at home'
'whats daddy doing?
'Hes at home'
'Whats that? pointing to a speck of dirt on the window
'its just dirt on the car'
'whats it doing?
arrrrghhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh

"what's that" is our worse question. Not long before we get the "why"s now though.

DD wouldn't sit on her potty for more than a split second before. She would literally get up as soon as she felt her bottom touch. Now she will sit for as long as I read books. Can see myself having quite a sore throat by the end of next weekend. With DS I used to make him sit for one episode of Thomas. But DD doesn't do TV. [exasperated emoticon] I think she has the control and will sit, so now it's a case of getting her to actually wee on the potty and we've cracked it. Obvious, I suppose.

"What's that", mmmm yes. Cute but very frustrating at times. DS made me laugh with the following recently:

DS: "Wassat?"
Me: "A Rhino"
DS: "A Rhino. Wassat?"
Me: "That's it's horn"
DS: "It goes Beep Beep"

We also tried sitting dd2 on the potty - she seems to want to sit on it when she says she's going to do a "poot" , but then she won't take her nappy off!

We painted today - she had the stampers out and was covered in about ten minutes. They do lots of painting at nursery and it makes me sad that she knows what to do because someone else taught her, not me. Ah, well. As my (not very) DM said, I'm "only a part-time mother" because I work outside the home too .

We went to Powis Castle yesterday and DD1 ran round the corridors upsetting the volunteers whilst dd2 wandered along behind her saying "hello man/hello lady" and giving them a huge grin - I think she was the decoy for dd2!

We get "Ossat?" too, then she repeats what we've told her several hundred times. If we ask her what something is and she hasn't got a word for it, she puts her hands out, shrugs and says "I dunno!"

2 year check tomorrow.
Ponka and Spots, how are your toddlers getting on wth the new babies?

Not too bad thanks, Helsy. A bit of obvious jealousy here and there, especially when I need to feed DS2 at a time in the day where DS1 is feeling delicate (e.g. after he gets up or at tea time). I could count on one hand the times he's tried to hit DS2 and he has gone straight on the naughty spot each time.

We have a slight problem with him shouting at DS2. Not because of jealousy but because the reaction he gets when DS2 startles or cries is very funny to him. We've been trying to distract him away but it's not working. He has started shouting at the cat, too.... and ladybirds (why?!)

I'm lucky that DS2 is so laid back that he lets me devote a lot of attention to DS1 at the moment. DS1 has always asked for a lot of attention, even as a baby. I feel terribly guilty and like I'm neglecting DS2 somewhat but they do both seem happy.

A question - what are all your little ones doing sleep - wise in the daytime? DS is showing signs of needing no sleep in the daytime sometimes now and he tends to want to sleep in later.

Ponka I probably the worst one to advise you on the sleep due to DD's insomnia. But we find some days shell sleep in the afternoon and want to go to bed later or others she wont sleep but then shes a nightmare at tea time. Were in a no win situation.
Shes still driving me up the wall with hitting. She does it for no reason. Tonight I asked her for a kiss and with both hands she hit me across the face! I must tell her off about 20 times a evening. MIL is no good and just says she doesnt mean it and im using the naughty step but that doesnt seem to prevent it either.

hi all!
kbaby, i honestly think that telling off does very little good at this age. they just dont understand, although your little one is very forward. dont they say the actions speak louder and to remove them from the situation. gives a clear message. so if she slaps your face just say no and put her away from you. keep at it and she'll stop. naughty step is same concept. i think the most important thing is not to fret or get yourself worked. they're still so young and its what toddlers do. not that i'm an expert.

dd was 2 on 28th. she had a ball. luckily we had the best day of the week (weren't the others crap?!) and had a bbq with 30 adults and 15 ish kiddies. fun! dd got a house for outside, a washing machine, kitchen, dyson! (cool) loads of other toys and ooooo, lots. bless.

dd did a wee on the potty when we were at my mums a couple of weeks ago. it was when it was hot and she was outside with nothing on, so we hasd he potty handy. she just said 'niamh wee wee' and sat and did a huge one! could not believe it. we had been playing with the potty for a few weeks - her sitting on it clothed and before bathtime etc but she has never sat on it for more than a few seconds. but she did just seem to know. perhaps i should have gone for it then but i couldnt face the 3 hour trip home and stuff so i decided to leave it until after her bday. but now its come, i keep thinking of other reasons not to! waiting for warm weather now!

oh and we are moving we love our house but need more room. have found a place not too far away. but feeling sad. anyone know anyone who want to buy a 3 bed barn conversion?

Hello Egypt. I'm not sure shouting works at 2 either - it just frightens dd2 - but I think she is learning right and wrong by osmosis because she hears us telling dd1 off.

HV and student HV came today to do dd2's 2 year check. She (dd2) didn't say a flaming word until HV was leaving, having written something along the lines of "mother says she can speak, but child was uncooperative during our visit", at which point dd1 started "reading" Dear Zoo, saying what all of the animals were and doing the voices and shouting "hurray! I did it!", saying "bye bye ladies, later!" as they were leaving, and blowing kisses, but apparently that didn't count .

She is short - I have friends with 1 yr olds as tall as her - but just within the normal range at 78cm. I couldn't help thinking, as she ticked things off her list, that if I'd told the HV that I fed dd2 on jammy dodgers and coke she'd have nodded and said "fine, you keep doing what you're doing mum".

i know what you mean helsy. it's all a load of b**llcks really. dd was also very quiet on our visit. which was at the health centre just to add strain to the situation. she was presented with the black and white pictures of cat, dog, horse, bird and man.

HV: where's the pussy cat
DD: quizzical look (like what the hell is a 'pussy' cat, speak normally woman). she pointed to nothing.
HV: where's the doggie (we say dog!)
DD points to the horse
Me: i think she thinks you said 'DONKEY'
HV: looks at me as if to say 'yeah right'.....where's the bird
dd points to bird
HV: where's the horse
DD points to horse (HA)
HV: where's the man
DD points to man
HV: where's the CAT
dd points to cat
HV: where's the DOG?
dd points to dog (HA DOUBLE HA)

she well confused the little mite

Nice tohear fromyou Egypt and Helsy. We don't get a two year check any more here. Sounds hilarious...

DD1 (!) havingterrible terrible issues with territory at the mo; can't helpwondering if it's related to arrival of new baby. My friend who has recentlymoved to nearby has a son 4 mionths younger than DD,and we do a lot of stuff together... but sadly the wee ones just spend most of the timein agonies ofrivalry. DD says over and over again: 'S. cannot have my...(buggy, cup, hat, rabbit, chair,car, apple rings, mummy...) even before they arrive and during a visit she is apoplectic if he picksup anything of hers. We try and take them out and about places but there's always a buggy, a hat or failing that a self to assert ownership of. 'No S. you CANNOT HAVE ME' she roared yesterday when he looked her fullinthe face and took a steptowards her. It is miserable.

She is full of tantrums but so fascinating too. I do sort of feel I understand what she is going through. Shecannot understand why he ought to be allowed this total travesty. her rights,in her mind,were absolute and now they're all at sea. But I donotknow how to respond.

Think there is a lot more sadness in her since DD2's birth. Tantrums too because she does not want to nap during the day, though she needs to. 'I was cryingand there were drips' she observed yesterday. Awww. I feelforher somuch. But it is all such a pain inthe arse. Frankly.

Hope all well elsewhere!

Bozza, were you cominguptoEdinburgh at somepoint?

Hiya - lovely to read everybody's news.
DS no longer has a nap in the day (unless we are in the car midday-ish) but he sleeps 6.30pm until about 7.45am which I am more than happy with!
I took both of them to the HV in the week for a height and weight check up. DS is 3lb heavier than 4yo DD - he's 38lb and he's only 10cm shorter - he's 90cm. We don't get a 2 year check, just a questionnaire with tick boxes, which we haven't had yet.

DD keeps trying to potty train DS by taking off his trousers and nappy and lowering him onto the potty saying "don't be scared, I'll read to you!" He has done a tiny pooh in the potty but no wee to date, so I'm not bothering.
I've been playing the piano for DD's pre school and have to take DS in with me. He sits with all the other children, does the actions and sings along and.....then follows them into the little room for story time! The teachers are fine about it and I just pootle off downstairs for 10 mins and then pick them both up at the end!

spots- Dont feel bad and think that its because youve had another that is making DD this way. I think its just the age they are at. I have to say I sometimes feel sorry for DD when shes being all adorable and then 5 mins later shes a monster again.

Judd - Your DD sounds so sweet, trying to potty train DS.

Your probably all right about the shouting. I know that sometimes if she hits me and just move her away and say I dont want you by me now as you just hurt me and that does seem to have more effect.
DH thinks shes Michael Jackson as she has a heart attack over any speck of dirt/fly etc.
Yesterday we had her pool out and she got in then saw a green fly in the water so got out and DH had to rescue it, then she got in but got grass in so had to get out again etc..Oh and she would only get in the pool if it was bath tempeture and had bubbles in it.

Shes starting nursery tomorrow. Shes going 2 afernoons a week. Im really worried about it but MIL are struggling to look after her full time so we have no choice really. I hope shell be ok.

KBaby - she'll be fine, don't worry. FWIW I also think your MIL sounds fab!

Kbaby, I think you're right - Dd1 would be hysterical if I said I didn't want to talk to her or see her because she had upset me, but if I spoke to her firmly and shook my head a lot she would just laugh... I have to say, having said a few posts ago that I don't shout at dd2 I think I probably do - DH told me I do, I just don't realise I'm shouting!

Getting a bit fed up with people thinking dd2 is only one and then being surprised that she can speak.
She's not been eating much meat and I was worried about her protein intake as she doesn't really like hard cheese either, but she munched her way through a lamb casserole tonight so I'm pleased.

Kbaby how was nursery?

ooo yes how was nursery kbaby? she'll be fine. it's only 2 afternoons anyway. she is such a clever little soul that she'll probably thrive on it. but i do know what you mean. i shall be pertrified the first time i leave dd. sept!

well, dont want to speak too soon but potty training is going great. she's really taken it on board in about 4/5 days. she knows when she needs to wee and seeks out the potty. has done 2 poos on it - alone! (guilt - i was in the kitchen and missed them both!) but that's great.
lots of accidents at first, but getting much much better.

we have a little ''at's MINE' person here too. including things that belong to other children, me and 'thats MY wee wee', whenever another child comes to peek at her pee.

Well nursery on the Monday went ok. MIL had to sneak out and after 1hr 45 they called mil to say she wanted to go home. She wouldnt speak about it at first but DH promised her a toy donkey if she went on Thursday and stayed all afternoon and she did. Apparently she had lots of fun drawing around her hands and painting and was fine. So fingers crossed.
Egypt at the potty training. DD just wees down her leg.

Were having a bit of an issue at the moment as MIL is letting DD sleep at 4.30 in the afternoon which means she doesnt want to go to bed until 9pm. It feels as if we dont get any evening then as im in bed by 10.30. DH has asked her to keep her awake at that time but MIL said its not fair to DD and surely we should be happy to see her for an extra hr each night.
What do you think?

Hopefully another nice weekend so were going to play in the garden in the pool again.

Enjoy the weekend

Hi, It's Ponka by the way. I've never been fond of the name I first chose and have finally got around to changing it.

I think that you need all the rest and relaxation you can get at the moment, kbaby. Especially in the evening. You mustn't be that far off now. How are you feeling? 4:30 is a very late time to sleep for her, too. What would happen if your MIL tried putting her down earlier or if she went to bed a bit earlier instead? Your MIL sounds great to be helping you out like she does but she should respect what you want for your DD.

OhPonka, please be ponka

I think it's about time for me to update. Spots we came to Edinburgh at half term but it was only a flying visit so didn't have time to organise a meet up. Since we got back we have started potty training. It is going fairly averagely but with improvements including a totally dry day on Thursday (although was a nursery day!). kbaby what time does DD sleep for you? Is she on the verge of dropping a nap and can't quite make it through to bedtime? My DD currently sleeps from 7.30 to 7 (or later) and has a 1 hour nap on nursery days and sometimes with us if it is in the car but a two hour nap on other days. But it is more like 1-3.

Bozza, you arevery brave. Potty training that is. I have experimented with DD and a pair of pam=nts with no success at all... she still looks such a baby shape, with her chubby legs... I couldn't get my head around the notion that she might achieve anything so was happy toleave it at that for now. She will poo in potty if she's running around naked butpeeing happens as and when with noapparent control whatsoever.

Did you enjoy ed'burgh? What did you do there? It is lovely at this timeofyear.

Kbaby Ithink it sounds like havingyourMIL looking after DD is rather stressfulin itself. Maybe not such a bad time tostart nursery... it does sound like there have been a few things about the current arrangemnent that haven't sat right with you. would that be fair to say?

I have a little bitofevening back... DD2 has got a bit better at sleeping soI don't need togotobed at 8.30any more. Feels bloody brilliant to be a grownup again. Though my space bar is still knackered.

DD1 full of pretend talk. Constantly interruptingour conversations to ask' mummy doyou want somesoup?' (offering glass of water with peas floating init) or to state 'Bob is coming on thetrain to my house and it will be a SMELLY ONE.' (Bob the Builder; smelly train.) Is it pretend though? or does she really sort of believe it? ah, weirdy children.

DD does look to have a tiny bottom now admittedly. And none of the shorts she was bought for her birthday will stay up so I had to raid last year's stuff out of the loft.

well i spoke too soon. dd did a massive wee on the floor of the play area in the doctors surgery today. very embarrassing. felt great after cleaning it up and apologising to the receptionist only to be tutted, eye rolled and sighed at by the cow....

Oh Egypt that sort of thing must happen all the time in a doctor's surely. DD has really got the hang of it today. She has been dry all day, including a dry nappy at naptime (I save it for bedtime then!) but did a poo in her pants. Fortunately though I got to it before she sat down. I really think she has got the hang of it. Instead of holding out until she is bursting and then shouting "wee-wee" and me jumping up and running her to the potty I have sat her on the potty every 2-3 hours and said "do a wee" and she has done one. Her friend came round this afternoon and decided she fancied a wee on DD's potty. So we had the "my potty" and "share" conversation and then after the friend had weed DD decided that she would have a go as well and managed to squeeze one out.

Edinburgh was lovely but I knew that as I have been before. We did the castle, Princes Street gardens, the station (!), wander on the royal mile, abortive attempt at shopping on Princes Street and the zoo. Would love a return vist sans children.

DD had her 2 year check today. Apparently our hv retired over a year ago and we have a new one. Unfortunately she was slightly early and DD was still asleep so I quickly woke her up and answered the door with DD half asleep and her hair all sweaty and stuck up. She then refused to say a word, but eventually consented to build a small tower, did a wooden puzzle really well and then did a quick scribble.

PitterPatter- MIL really is excellant but she tends to wait until DD asks to go and lay down, MIL never wanted a cot so DD has always slept on her settee. I know on some occasions DD has been really tired with me and ive cuddled her to sleep and I guess in a way forced her to go to sleep but only because I know that she is really tired Whereas MIL wont do that.

Ive been in hosp this week.
Thursday I went in with contractions which stopped and then Sunday I had to go back in again as my temp and heart rate were sky high and the babies. They couldnt find anything wrong so I came home yesterday but guess what this morning ive woken up with spots, so im back down the gps tonight to see if it was chicken pox.
DD is quite grouchy as well with a streaming nose so I dont think shell be far behind me.

Bozza, We must be half way. If she has one shes too awake for bedtime and if she doesnt shes a nightmare at bedtime. Unfortunetly if I move her bedtime forward she wakes at 2am wide awake.

I left DD's nappy off this morning and told her if she wanted a wee to do it in her potty. Well the little monkey can actually force herself to wee. Which she did with great delight, 7 times all in a row all over my floor!!! tiny little trickles. Nappies now back on.

spots - I guess your right. MIL is brilliant at looking after DD for us and DD adores her but because shes not my mother I find her very sensitive and im afraid to say anything to her because she gets upset and says we must think she does a bad job of looking after DD, which we dont think. If it was my mum I could be a bit more honest with her and tell her what I do or dont want her doing. Never mind only 3 weeks left in work and then ill be with DD each day and probably tearing my hair out.