April 2011 - nearly 2, it's still all about you <disclaimer, I might be having a bad day>

[UnderwaterBasketWeaving]

Thanks to Frak, thread title queen!

UBW that sounds totally shit. I would have the rage too. Nothing helpful to offer except probably that picking either the laid back 'let him stay downstairs until he's tired' approach or the strict 'let's do CC until we've got this licked' supernanny type approach sounds better than your current middle ground. Not making any judgement on any version of those approaches, just observing that what you're currently doing doesn't seem to be working for your family in your context.

You are a fab mummy UBW. I have no advice, but plenty of hugs and here to listen...x

Oh UBW I understand and I sympathise. I don't have an answer but I'll admit to following Ali's line of thinking.

M is much better. DH is with him today so I get precious headspace. I've slept, had a shower and ignored the state we left the house in! I texted for an update and just got his readings - sat 98% so they're diminishing the oxygen. He's still all IVd up but seems to tolerating it better now.

Thats good news Nom, what a relief

Good news Nom!

Fab news nom! Glad dh has been able to take a shift.

Having spent all day with my work colleagues, I am not getting ready to go out for dinner....... With my work colleagues! It's to say goodbye to crappy boss and make sure she is really going :o

Has anyone seen the new muppet movie? With Jason Segal and Amy Adams. I know it verbatim! When it finishes B cries to get it back on! He dances to the songs and loves Kermit! So sweet!

I'm looking for inspiration for films with lots of songs and dancing in them suitable for B and available to download to the iPad. We have a 6 hour drive coming up soon and will go mad if we have to watch the same thing 3 times in a row!

Labrynth? Shrek?

With David Bowie? That labyrinth? Isn't that scary?

Labyrinth is one of my favorite films ever! But probably a bit scary at the mo.

So glad M is doing better, Nom.

DH recalled an idea from bedtime live. To break the association with bedtime chaos, and reinforce the lie down and sleep, we're going to leave him up till ~9pm (about his usual sleep time), and if he asks to go to bed, or looks like he's going to crash, whip him up for a quick story and to sleep. Then gradually bring that time forwards.

(posted too soon)

At least that should be less stressful for everyone. I'm planning on some really boring toys, no tv, while I try to do some work.

CM has reiterated just how difficult and stubborn he is compared to "most". Which is reassuring that it's not just us being sensitive, but worrying when you see "difficult" teenagers all day and wonder how they ended up like that.

Good luck ubw.
I heart labyrinth but tea might be too soon

Hmm, yes I think Labryinth might be a tad old just yet.
Does he really watch a whole film? DD loves Peppa (x a million) if you can bear that.
I haven't actually tried to get her to watch a film but she usually wanders away from the tv and leaves me watching :)

Films, DS1 loved from early on; Alvin & the Chipmunks (not my fave), Nemo (minus the first few minutes), Bugs Life, Toy Story, Bee Movie.

UBW - good luck. I think once you have a plan you'll feel better instantly. Fingers crossed.

UBW good luck!

Fizz - T loves Cars and Cars 2, and they both have good soundtracks. You can also get The Gruffalo, Gruffalo's child and Room on the Broom on DVD.
Have to say that we've never bothered with a DVD in the car even on 8-12 hour treks across France. The boys tend to sleep lots and we have the odd bout of nursery rhyme singing. We've also got the soundtrack to Peter and the Wolf which they adore - it is the version with Sean Connery narrating.

Nom - meant to say yay for M being so much better! :)

DH sent me away and has done it himself. F was screeching when I was trying to manhandle a gross nappy off him I got told I wasn't helping and was told to go away.

So, they don't need me. It's me with the problem.

I just went up to see what was going on and was sent away again.

I feel like shit.

Aww, ((hugs)) UBW & lots of them.

Remember, when we're stressed & tired we all say and do things we don't mean. I'm sure your DH never meant to make you feel shit. He's just doing the bloke thing of 'solving' the problem without understanding the emotional side of things.

Deep breath, and distract yourself.

Went up again and was allowed to say goodnight. F just said "mummy work".

(((UBW))) If they can sort it out between them though then that is good. It takes the pressure off you.
DH is much better at settling our boys to sleep than I am, much better. DS1 is poorly this evening and only wanted Daddy at bedtime.

Try and focus on the end result if you can!

Nemo minus the first few minutes used to go down well here, just for short bouts but not anymore. Cars too, but there is only so many times we can bear it.

I'm thinking about getting a few singing kettle (do you get that in Englandshire?) DVDs, because its all about music and doing actions for him just now.

He doesn't sit and watch a whole film, but the muppets holds his attention for longer than most. God that makes me sound terrible! He really doesn't watch that much tv, honest!

I think it was DH solving things by getting it done. He's done the kitchen and made me a hot choc too.

It's the feeling that I'm rubbish at this, and not needed. At least when I was BFing I had a role. Now they don't need me at all. Is this what traditional fathers feel like? Just here to pay the bills and no more?

I'll be the first to admit I'm not cut out for staying at home all day every day with him. And the running joke is that I'm just the night nanny, and his real mummy is the cm. But... there is an undercurrent of truth.

He fell asleep much later tonght, but without the running around. Tomorrow he is going to be horrible. And we're going for tea at a friend's. Oh dear.

For films, F's really into The Lorax at the moment, although he can't sit still for the whole thing. Tends to ask to watch it while he's bimbling around doing other things. We also bought HOP the other day, which I love and F is ok with. Got the muppets Treasure Island, but turned it off because its got some scary labyrinth-esque goblin-y things in it.

UBW :( You sound so down, I'm really sorry you're struggling atm. Motherhood is a guilt-fest whichever way you turn, whatever choices you make. (((hugs)))

I have got DS1 at home poorly. I thought it was coming, he had a bit of a cough yesterday, and then he didn't want much dinner last night. He's been in bed with me most of the night, and is now tucked up in my bed watching Beebies and eating apples.
Not going to get much done today then!

Aww UBW sorry I've missed most of this but will just reiterate what everyone else has said, you're not a shit mum at all, you're just doing what needs to be done to get you through.

And Nom so glad to hear M is a wee bit better, how scary! How did he manage to get pneumonia??

Kitty Can empathise on the horrible boss situation, I have one too but she isn't leaving unfortunatley! However on the plus side she is off sick just now and might stay off until I leave

Sooo, anyone else potty training?? We started on Monday and aside form 1 little pee on the floor on day 1, we have had no accidents at all! I'm so pleased with her! Admittedly she has just been running around the house with no bottom half on but she has asked everytime she's needed and even done a couple off her own back if I haven't been in the room. Today, however, she is at nursery so first day with big girl pants and trousers on! I'm so nervous that she'll forget and get upset if she gets wet?! Will have to wait til 4.30 I guess and see what she's wearing when I go to pick her up!!

I am absolutley full of the cold and back to work tonight after a weeks holiday and a week off sick with my back. Really can't be arsed with it! I also now seem to have developed stress incontinence with this pregnancy - very embarrassing, anyone else ever experienced it?

Oh yeah and Nemo, Ice Age 1, 2, 3 & 4 (!) and Bee Movie are all firm favourites here. Rio is the latest addition and is also getting played to death!!

UBW I sympathise - I was really cheerful all yesterday then when I picked Joanna up from the CM disovered she has started calling her 'Mummy'

Joanna will quite easily sit through a whole film if plonked in high chair when I need to get the housework done (or on Sunday mornings if DP and I fancy a crafty shag ). If she's cruising around she'll watch bits then bimble off and then come back to it (but get cross if you turn it off in the interim). She is currently obsessed with Finding Nemo (hence the cake), Ice Age, Toy Story and Monsters Inc.

Feeling quite about the amount of TV she gets plonked in front of but, in my defense, because of current living arrangements (computer fixing business in front room) it's not safe to leave her alone in the living room playing with her toys. There are screwdrivers, bits of memory chip and other people's laptops all over the place so she has to be really closely supervised. And we have to get the housework done somehow so she gets strapped into her highchair whilst we're cleaning the bathroom or doing the washing up or cooking the dinner! Keep promising myself she will watch less TV when we've moved...