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Post-natal clubs

Join our Postnatal Clubs forum to find parenting advice for newborns.

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Original poster

November 2012 - hurry up to graduate, we're running out of November

999 replies

StuntNun · 26/11/2012 11:03

Previous thread: www.mumsnet.com/Talk/postnatal_clubs/1611078-November-2012-the-birthplosion-thanks-Peaky

Stats list: www.mumsnet.com/Talk/antenatal_clubs/1485512-November-2012-Stats-List

OP posts:

Are your children’s vaccines up to date?

Set a reminder

Sophiathesnowfairy · 04/12/2012 13:54

horsey don't worry about worrying. See I still worry on number four and ask questions about stuff. Xx

PetiteRaleuse · 04/12/2012 13:59

Ha! My granny, in her 90s, still tells my mum, in her 60s to wrap up warm and not catch cold. The worrying we are doing now is just the beginning :)

So the last thing we need to worry about is worrying too much, otherwise we're setting ourselves up for a fall

ShellyBobbs · 04/12/2012 14:17

Helloooooooooooooooooooooooo mummy guilt! It's here for the rest of your life

See how guilty you feel for this one when number 2 comes along!

ValiumQueen · 04/12/2012 14:29

Oh yes shelly guilt steps up a notch or six with the arrival of number 2.

J is finally asleep. On my lap. Feel like I have not put him down all day. He is not well, but cough is more productive. Liking the saline nasal spray, he however is not. Helps him feed though.

ShellyBobbs · 04/12/2012 14:30

VQ Hope your little one recovers soon, how worrying for you both.

Chunky These men can be more stressful than the babies sometimes.....

ValiumQueen · 04/12/2012 14:35

It doesn't get any easier shelly does it? I know others go through way worse. He will get better, and fairly soon, but it really is horrible to watch. And my boobs hurt! I wish he would feed again soon, but I will not wake him as sleep is helping him get better.

Passmethecrisps · 04/12/2012 15:12

Ah, the guilt, worry spiral! I am already proving myself quite adept at this.

In 2032 we will still be worrying about what our DCs are eating, how much they are sleeping and whether they have a cold.

For lunch I have just eaten noodles in soy sauce, hula hoops and a mini aero. Nutritious! It's no wonder I look rough.

Titsalinabumsquash · 04/12/2012 15:22

J has slept all day, waking very briefly to pee on the HV and latch on to feed where he promptly fell straight back to sleep and has been there ever since... He's gearing himself up for another waking night I guess

MIL talked DP into letting J "cry it out" when he's clean/dry/fed etc. it lasted all of 5 minutes before I picked him up and cuddled him to sleep, I'm not sure wether I should be embarrassed or not really, I imagine its not a great pattern to get into but I simply cannot sit there and listen to my baby cry.

Chunkychicken · 04/12/2012 15:31

I don't do 'crying it out' at all Tits. It's not necessary (most of the time) and I believe it can be counter-productive. Unfortunately, A seems to cry a lot. He goes from 0 to ravenous in 60s... I watch him fast asleep, dead to the world, then in literally a minute, he smacks his lips, stirs slightly & starts crying for a feed. I feel bad that he 'gets there' as crying is meant to be the last hunger cue isn't it? That's why the dummy was employed - when changing a nappy before a feed, he would scream but was content with the dummy last night.:)

YellowWellies · 04/12/2012 15:42

Babies who are left to cry it out cry MORE as babies and as toddlers as they are less secure. I reckon our babies are too young to cry it out just yet - they need to learn to trust that their needs will be met and that someone cares for them. Jonas however did have to cry to himself a mo' ago whilst I was on the loo!!!! Thank god for the musical mobile it soothes the worst of it...

PetiteRaleuse · 04/12/2012 15:47

I can't leave mine to cry it out, which goes against French reasoning and sets me up for all kind of criticism. I just don't see who benefits. I hate the noise and the children get stressed.

gardenpixies32 · 04/12/2012 15:48

I just watched DT2 turn her head from one side to the other while on her tummy! She did this while almost turning over!

DT's know all about crying! It is sometimes impossible to see to both of them at the same time. Unfortunately, one has to have a little cry every now and them! Saying that though, I have mastered feeding both at the same time and picking up both at the same time!

blonderthanred · 04/12/2012 16:03

Absolutely agree with YW, I think babies who are made to feel secure and confident will grow up to be much more self-sufficient and happy. And who can bear to sit back and listen to their baby crying like that? Even with twins you're not leaving the other one, they still know you're there & can hear you.

Anyone who says the 'rod for your own back' phrase should be left in a cupboard for a week & see how they feel. Maybe. Or just smile & nod, smile & nod (TM MN).

YellowWellies · 04/12/2012 16:08

PR I think there's a huge difference between crying and crying it out - I'm sure your two know that you'll be with them shortly - you're not just ignoring them to toughen them up. Some crying is inevitable. I'm a twin and my Mum said not knowing which crying babe to tend to first was the hardest thing with having twins.

gardenpixies32 · 04/12/2012 16:46

YW it is hard. Most of the time I can tell who has a more desperate cry compared to who is just having a whinge.

What amazes me is that one can be screaming her head off at 4am and the other one is sound asleep next to her!

Passmethecrisps · 04/12/2012 16:52

Thankfully wee P usually gives warning cues before getting to crying. Sometimes though she does go straight for crying - or we can't hear the cues because we happen to be sleeping/peeing/showering. She hates nappy changes so cries then.

At nights we have been trying to encourage P to self-settle again. She was great at this then the constipation threw her off. She grizzles and whimpers and very occassionally yelps. We give her 10 mins max and any actual crying is responded to immediately.

My mum surprised me no end at the weekend by saying you couldn't spoil a baby. Just took me by surprise really as I thought she would be more old school.

Ok, I have some food/sleep worrying. Today p has eaten less per feed than normal. I think I need to start logging her patterns as I am losing track.

applepieinthesky · 04/12/2012 16:53

Yep as soon as I found out I was pregnant I was conscious that I'll be worrying about this little one for the rest of my days.

I have actually managed to cook a decent meal tonight and it feels like an achievement!

Passmethecrisps · 04/12/2012 16:53

And I CANNOT imagine managing with twins. I am bad enough coping with the guilt of feeding P when the cat wants fed!

Passmethecrisps · 04/12/2012 16:57

Hi-5 apple! I might try that tonight. Maybe

gardenpixies32 · 04/12/2012 17:07

You would cope pass, we are women and are amazingly resilient!

gardenpixies32 · 04/12/2012 17:09

Oh, and in our darkest hours with the babies (and there have been a few), my DP's mantra is..."At least it's not triplets!"

My cousin had 7 rounds of IVF, 8th round worked and she is now 22 weeks with triplets. Scary.

YellowWellies · 04/12/2012 17:21

My Mum and Dad only knew the day she had us that it was twins, throughout the pregnancy she kept being told she was putting on too much weight and 'letting herself go' (this was the 70s), eventually they gave her an X-ray (no scans in those days, great thing to do to an unborn child!!) and saw a shadow so told her it was triplets. My Dad nearly passed out - so when they corrected that it was in fact ONLY twins - they were quite relieved despite the fact that they had to go and swap the cot, pram etc for twin friendly ones.

Mum always said the first year is hardest and after that twins are easier as they entertain each other - so hold that thought. I LOVE being a twin it's the best thing ever.

DesperateHousewife21 · 04/12/2012 17:27

Wow triplets! Do dads get more paternity leave for twins/ triplets? If not I think they should.

ValiumQueen · 04/12/2012 17:32

Leave is the same regardless of number. My dad is a triplet. No scans 80 years ago. They just kept coming.

Well, J woke, had a lovely big feed, puked it back again. Bugger.

kirrinIsland · 04/12/2012 17:45

Agreed YW being a twin is great :-) i almost wish I'dhad twins myself - almost

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