December 2011: Of Mice, Men and Tables

[NorthernChinchilla]

Here we go...I hope!

Thursday not third!!

Everything takes so much longer with a baby! well done mopsy on your progress so far!
seven yes, we'll definitely be trying to encourage daytime napping in the new room. He only catnaps though...
BIL is here now and he's set up with his super strong tea and is making a start. (My wardrobe is first.)
Not got much work done yet though...

Just booked my first blood donation session in an age. It's tomorrow afternoon. Time to start paying it back:)

First time I have been online today been on my feet at work since 8am with a special event at least I can head home early once I have put my time in.

Last night he woke at 12.45 due to a nappy malfunction I changed him, gave him a couple oz of FF to get him back down but then we spent until sometime after 2 just generally waahing, gaahing and failing to go back to sleep, it is just incessant I would almost prefer he was crying it just goes on and on and on. It seems to be due to the fact that he needs something in his mouth to get back to sleep he sticks his teddy?s feet and arms in there and will not settle until they are just right, obviously then I have to go in and take them off him once he is asleep but oh my lord it was frustrating. I guess it is too late to introduce a dummy for comfort though I don?t want him to have one really.

Ive got a headache now it is so humid here!! Still raining of course.....

Sat laughing at the wanted posts on the local recycling group. Someone is asking for specific items from Ikea. I'm tempted to email them a link to the item on the Ikea website... :o

Bless, I don't think some people really "get" Freecycle....
Maybe they think there are closet philanthropists on there waiting to pounce and buy them things....

Hmmm. Back home, DS is a bit hot again, but can't have him bottle refusing so only gave him one EBM bottle
at ten (took less than an ounce) and have BF him twice since. Sigh. We'll try again later in the week I think.

figgy it's not too late to introduce a dummy. And if you curtail usage to nighttime only, you should be able to avoid problems later.
I might retry BOi with a dummy later this month/next month, if after getting his own room etc doesn't stop him waking in the night.
He's never liked a dummy when we've tried it in desperation, but last week my SIL told me that my niece's baby had given BOi a dummy (really??) and he enjoyed it for about 20 minutes. "Did I mind?"
Yes I f-ing do mind!! My actual wimpy polite reaction was, "No, I suppose if it was just then, and we don't allow him a dummy any other time, he won't start getting dependent on one."
It's freezing here today. The house has been really warm until today. With the big windows, it just takes a little bit of sunshine to heat the place up nicely. But today is cold and grey and it hasn't stopped raining. I will not be putting the heating on. I have instead put on a big jumper. I can't afford the mortgage and heating!

rant alert

grump grump grump continued

DH has really got my goat. i know i'm very lucky to have time off on maternity leave with my lovely boys but i do find it hard having no time 'off'. i find being constantly on guard really full on and so i've been trying to arrange some time where i can just be on my own. he just doesn't get it. he says he doesn't get time off at work and he has to cope with that and come home and pitch in.

i did a 10k run yesterday where he had to look after the boys for two hours and i came back to find him in a total strop because it hadn't gone smoothly and he was then in a vile mood all day. it feels like he is putting the guilt trip on me for having a little time away. he just really really doesn't understand that its really claustrophobic and i do enjoy it but i just need a little time away. i know he does too but he does have a little freedom in where he has lunch and he can just go for a drink after work.

every discussion about this ends up with him saying well you go back to work then and i'll give up and look after the boys. its doing my head in.

does your "d"H realise how much you do as a mum? Of course he doesn't. You've told us how two hours of DCs has him frazzled and you have them for 8-10 hours every day! I don't know quite how much leave he gets but maybe you could Suggest to him the following, which would put him in your place and make him appreciate you do need time off...

Ask him to book two consecutve weekdays off work. The first becomes YOUR day off. dH will have the boys from 8am (or whenever he leaves for work) until 6pm (or whatever time he get home usually). Je can do whatever he likes BUT let him know what you would do on that typical day (eg rhyme time, shopping, park, whatever). Then you go and do whatever relaxes you. Trip to the flick (Magic mike perhaps?), swim, jog, sauna, pub lunch, library/coffee shop with book. Whatever.
When you get home ask him how his day was. Tell him every day is like that for you (unless it clearly isn't!) the next day is HIS day off (see, you get one each, equitable like). So he can donwhatever he wants.
At the end of that day, ask him whether day 2 was nice, and whether if he was doing day 1 all the time he would Want some "him time" occasionally. Worth a try...?

DS is hot and a little grotty. Have completely abandoned bottles, will wait til he is better. Horlicks.

After having had a none too smooth time of it yesterday whilst you were running (well done missus!), he should understand how full on it can be. If 2 hours put him in a strop, he should realise that after 6 months you might be feeling a bit jaded! Maybe he needs this pointed out to him.
He shouldn't throw around comments about "you go back and I'll look after the boys" - you might take him up on it. I'm back at work full time, and, I've said it before, it is a BREEZE! It's a holiday in comparison with none-stop wrestling with BOi!
You do need a breathing space, and he should help out. Can you get him to agree to something fixed, rather than say "I'd like some time off" would he respond better to "Monday, 6-7pm, I'm going to Pilates, you and the bboys will have a nice break from me." Otherwise maybe you can ask a family member to pitch in one morning a week or something, or is there a gym with a creche facility where you can hand them over for a couple of hours whilst you recharge your batteries?

Hawthers After 2 hrs on his own with them then he must understand how you would feel after 8-10 hrs surely? I agree with the above about 2 days off. Instead of using up 2 days of his holiday leave, why not test it out at the weekend?

hawthers - symphathies - as ever your DH could be mine I think! DH thinks it is a doss being at home and much better than going to work. however, he had a day and a half of looking after DCs at the w/e on his own (as I was working) - he survived, they survived but absolutely nothing else was accomplished and it took me a good hour to clear up the house. His comment - I don't want to spend every hour tidying up - funnily enough - neither do I.

Must run in the family though as PILs are here today helping with the kids whilst I work - DS has every single toy he possesses out somewhere downstairs - it is so annoying. DS also behaves terribly at times when they are here and then I have to come down hard on him but he has been so good recently so it is annoying. rant over.... for now..

Oi I am jealous of your finished kitchen - ours is STILL a "work in progress"

Hawthers I know how you feel on this one. DP doesn't ever have DS on his own he gets too grumpy so not worth it. Only way I get round it is Gym with creche. I go twice a week and DS is in the creche for an hour each time. Its so nice to be able to swim and then have a shower without worrying about the baby crying! Don't know if thats a possibility for you but it keeps me going as I know i've always got that hour.

In other news DS has his first tooth :) I'm hoping that now its through he will maybe let me get a little bit of sleep!

hawthers another here for your DH. I think aethels plan sounds like a great idea.

oi I have serious kitchen envy, it must be around 6 times bigger than mine!

There's a mouse in me kitchen what am I gonna do?

Little bleeder shot across the floor and under the fridge today. As DD pointed out: Mummy went jump!

for hawthers and figgy's OH's. I think aethel's plan sounds good too

mopsy congrats on finishing the chapter, especially with minim having been so ill lately. I think my brain would struggle with anything more taxing than CBeebies at the moment!

Oi kitchen envy here too, it's fabulous. It's the one room I'd like to completely re-do in my house, but roof repairs and new windows are taking priority for now.

LMF well done on the blood donation, and thanks for the reminder. It's been years since I've managed to do it due to my pregnancies and being rubbish at remembering to do it

Get well soon to AethelSpawn and hang in there Aethel. I'm sure the boobs will be swiftly reclaimed once he's better. I'm convinced the problem with my DS was as for his eating, and all linked to the pain of teething (as well as a bit of stubbornness and fondness for boob!). I've managed to only BF first thing yesterday and today, and after the agony of Saturday night my supply seems to be adjusting quickly now. I did a feed at 6am and will only need minimal pumpage before bed tonight. Last night DS went down at 7.30, woke screaming at 10.30, didn't want any milk and was eventually settled down by DH about 11.20...and then slept through until 6am . Today he's had the one big BF and then 22oz of formula over 4 bottles through the day. He went down about half an hour ago, fingers crossed for another good night tonight. I can't believe the contrast to just a week ago when he was refusing both bottles and food, waking frequently through the night, and I thought I'd never get my body back. I'm not trying to gloat here, just to let you know that it can and will be done for you too.

Well done mopsy- you've worked so hard through your pregnancy and now with your LO actually here. It's really impressive doing a PhD through all of that, and let's face it, Doctor Mopsy has an ace ring to it

My Bob seven and AWCH, we can't be having more babies already! Time is passing so quickly!
Oh, and my friend had her little girl, sounds like it was a real labour iyswim, twinges started on Thursday and delivered yesterday, with naff all sleep in between. Had to have a drip to get her going, and although nearly ended up with a section, managed to get her out...but with a tear. I'm doing her a 'mummy survival kit'- Hotel Chocolate choccie, choccie biscuits, some body lotion and some Lansinoh! Plus a Lamaze toy for her DD.

You could try a dummy figgy, if he's popping things in his mouth anyhow it may make night times a bit easier?

Ah, the old 'you're at home, therefore it's easy' argument. It always used to bug me when people complained about people getting off to look after kids, as if they were going off to drink cocktails by a pool. It's sodding hard work hawthers, and then to be unable to have an adult conversation about it must be doubly frustrating.

Going to open my anniversary card shortly, hopefully we'll get to actually have our day our at some point

Hawthers definitely make time for yourself I'm perversely enjoying being back at work and being back in adult conversation.

My cm has said she can feel a tooth coming thru maybe that explains the frantic overnight teddy chewing. Will just have to ride it out and see what happens.

Apologies to figgy's OH...I meant to put to jiggle's OH but put the wrong name. I think it's the 'gg' bit that confused me. Told you my brain wasn't up to anything at the moment

(I have kitchen envy of my kitchen.)
The nursery furniture is now built. I'll research themes tomorrow... Or maybe now. I've forgotten what else I wanted to say! X

I went to the theatre tonight. I've not fed Octoboy since five-ish. He is asleep. I huuuuuuuuurt!

Haddock, pompoms and tea where needed. I'm off to have a word with my boobs >_

lmf hope you had a good evening out and that the boobs are now sorted. I know that feeling all too well at the moment. Everyone fast asleep still but I've been awake since 4.30

LMF Hope you had a good night at theatre.

Oi of your kitchen. Hope you find a nice theme for BOi's room.

Sky didn't sleep well and is still grumpy this morning I feel pants and DP is being less than nice!

Woo he slept until 6 I of course woke at 5.30 as am used to less sleep now good thing is he's had a bath, I'm up ready for work and he's back asleep in his bed.

oi our nursery is jungle themed with stickers, the monkey jamboree about 10 others stuffed animals (including a wolf, tiger and strangely a killer whale) how about something nautical it seems very in at the moment.

Haddocks to dsm your man needs to get his arse into gear and stop taking things out on you.

Banbury- up every two hours overnight with the Spawn (thankfully the DDs seem OK now). Nasty 3am moment when he wa v irritable but he's a bit better now, still not my happy gummy boy though.
Meeting FIL today who doesn't see Us v often as he lives abroad. Will be nice to catch up even if I look awful and house is a mess.

Figgy Thanks. It was just a little debate over money. He thinks £500 SMP should stretch further than it does for the month. My PMT isn't helping matters as I'm on edge and feeling down about myself.