FEB 2010 Terrors sometimes, angels at others - yep, they're properly two now...

[InmaculadaConcepcion]

New thread!!

DD is about 87/88cm I just measured her while she was sleeping which sounds about right as puts her on 25th which is where she was on her 2 yr check.

stoof have you got enough chocolate? Glad he is home for the night and obviously good luck for the rest of the week.

Grrjust did a long post which disappeared. Going to sleep now. cp hope this marks a turning point for your DD.

Thanks all for the tips! Going to stock up on disposable change mats, and pull ups now. And will definitely take a potty with us on the drive just in case. Potty training was a little unexpected this weekend with DD deciding that she didn't want to wear nappies anymore....

Not a good start to the week with dd2 in floods of tears when dh went to work this morning... I think in her ideal world we would all be at home together but unfortunately that won't pay the bills

86cm in height, forgot that length is a bit bigger

nk :( she'll adjust and your setting yourself up for your family future which when she is a teenager demanding the latest fashions she'l thank you for.

CP Agree, and after all I am only working 2 1/2 days, often compressed into two days, so it's not as if we are all 'abandoning' her ...

IC great to hear you sounding so lively and positive so soon after the birth, which sounds marvellous. Well done you Your DS sounds too adorable for words. It really is making me feel very nostalgic for those newbaby days... ok broody I did even suggest to DH in a moment of drunkeness madness that we have another baby in due course, and he very swiftly put paid to that idea!

Ah just caught up on your slightly less chilled post! When DD doesn't poo, is that in nappy or toilet? Incredibly frustrating either way. But glad to hear that DS is behaving himself

I think that DD1 is still very much adjusting to her little sister's arrival. Her behaviour definitely took a turn for the worse in the months following DD2's arrival - but of course who's to say that wouldn't have happened anyway as she was coming on for 21 months when DD2 was born. I would say DD1 is just starting to enjoy interacting with DD2 now, she tickles her feet and DD2 laughs her head off. DD2 has always adored DD1 and follows her around the room with her huge eyes (as she is a stationary little object still at nearly 10m).

The way it is in our little set-up at weekends, is that DH naturally takes care of DD1 as I have always had to BF DD2 and so have ended up doing her nappies, clothes etc. Now that system is quite entrenched as DH prefers spending time with DD1 as he finds her more fun, and I prefer spending time with DD2 as I find her easier. We do 'swop' sometimes.

stoof You are really going through it. So pleased that DS is out of hospital, thinking of you.

rainbow how is PT going?

NK are you feeling better? Glad to hear that DD2 has overcome her PP-ing. DD1 often asks Daddy not to go to work (and I quite often feel like clinging to his legs too).

CP glad that DD seems to be on the mend.

SB arf at DS weeing man-style DD1 is fascinated that Daddy wees standing up but Mummy wees sitting down.

SR at DD2 going overnight without her nappy. Wow. How did it go? DD1 wakes every morning with SUCH a full nappy, I have absolutely no idea when she will be able to go through the night but it is a LONG way off.

DD1 is still not potty-pooing, we haven't tried no knickers. We tend to keep her in knickers at home as she would rather go commando but her nursery have asked that she wears knickers - so to get her used to them she wears them all the time. And poos in them. We have tried bribery, to no avail. She is not allowed chocolate any more, and we have told her many times she can have some if she does a poo.

She is in a nappy right now (having a nap, yay!!!) so I expect to find it pooey when I take it off.

I gave the girls lunch at 10.30 so that I could put them both down for an 'afternoon' nap before heading out for a playdate at 2pm. It has worked!!!! Hence massive post from me. Wow it is nice to have some child-free time. It's great having DH around at the weekends but what would be really nice is to have some actual time to myself i.e. without kids. I think this is the part DH fails to grasp, no matter how many times I spell it out to him. And to be fair we are so busy most weekends that there isn't time for that. And to be even fairer, I spent a lot of Saturday hungover in bed so I suppose that does count as child-free time.

we've been going to a different swimming pool over the holidays which has a family changing room. Cue a fair few conversations about how men and boys have willies and no, you can't touch daddy's willy along with phrases 'where's DS/Daddy's vulva'.

DD runs around trying to get DS to chase (crawl) after her. He can cruise along using the walkers now.

dd2 has a serious case of builder's bum today because her jeans are cut to accommodate a nappy...

Cracked up laughing about dd2 a little while ago. She tried to tell me something secret by whispering it to me but whispered towards my mouth, not my ear... Hilarious how she is trying to be all grown up but doesn't quite get it

CP DS is often telling me that him and daddy have a zizi (willy in French), the fact that he uses afrench word is useful and far less embarrassing when this conversation happens in the supermarket.

This morning, he seems quite surprised that it was still there when I took the nappy off. I guess it's a boy thing

SR I'm well impressed at your DD2 going nappy free at night time

Well we've decided to stop giving a bottle of milk to DS at bed time. The last one will be on Thursday so every evenings I put less and less milk in it and we're telling him that as he is a big boy he doesn't need a bottle anymore. Fx it'll work

NK

SB that's reminded me of a question. How much milk does everyone's DC still take every day? DD hasn't been eating to her usual level the last 3 days and I'm wondering whether we give her too much milk. She takes about 700 mls each day. (we're still giving her a bottle and in fact as she's so sleep resistant have also given her a bottle in her sleep rather than waking her up)

scones potty training going really well! DD decided on Saturday that she's wearing "big girl pants", and that was that. About 5 accidents so far, 3 of which I think are authentic accidents and 2 which I suspect she may have done just to change to a new set of pants (as after a conversation of me telling her she doesn't have to get her pants wet to change them, she's stopped) :) I've made her a chart (using a drawn out table on coloured paper and cut out coloured paper stars) so she gets to stick stars on the chart herself using glue which she loves. The treat is being able to stick the stars and pooing on the loo gets her a lot of stars. THis way she gets to see how well she's done. (and mummy also gets stars if mummy does potty!) Have also taken mous' previous advice to get some brightbots training pants which have been helpful while out and about - though more to allay DH and my concerns. Today was first day with Daddy and he's taken a very laid back approach to it, leaving her to deicde to go on her own with no prompting, so much so that she was upset at me when I came back and tried to remind her as I was doing before. So mummy needs to chill out a bit more.

SR will take a leaf from your book and only do away with night nappies once dry at night!

cp goodness - your DS is a fast developer!

Here's a good article on child development and what they call voiding frequency
ecsimplified.com/wp-content/uploads/Voiding-pattern-in-healthy-children-0-to-3-years-old.pdf

rainbow DS was only drinking 140ml of milk in his bottle

rainbow DD2 is a milk monster she has about a litre per day she is not keen on eating, almost all of it is for breakfast (which she won't eat at all).

1st day at kindergarden! She almost ran all the way (just like her sister did), and we parted with very casual "bye".
She needed a doctor notice before going and she has speech delay written on it She is about a year behind according to her pead. who still not worried though...

not sure what to do with myself now

stoof how are you and the kids today?

No bottle though for DD1, beaker or straw or babychinos or even lapping a bowl when she is a cat or a dog

Hardly any milk here, just in cereal and the odd tiny glass full at bedtime. Two dry and nappy free nights here from DD2, I'm feeling optimistic about it now Sounds as though potty training is continuing pretty well all round. Remember that they all quite early for it, despite what people might say!

mous good to hear that your DD2 has skipped into kindergarten, but sorry it took a doctor's letter.

IC glad your first day without Mr IC went well.

NK my DD2 also struggled with going to nursery yesterday, and has also become obsessed with her daddy. This proved interesting when she wanted him to get her out of the bath last night but he was still at work

CP is your DD better?

stoof how are you doing?

scones lovely to hear you sounding so relaxed.

rainbow nice to hear from you.

Quick update from me: the six weeks holiday have gone in a flash, thanks to careful planning about what to do. Our week in France was lovely, and the DDs really enjoyed having their cousins to play with. Unfortunately, DH was distant and unengaged most of the time. When I called him on it, he first got defensive, then apologised and stepped up a bit. At times. And only when he felt like it. I was glad to have my sister and her family, and my parents there too to share the chores and to generally chat to.

MIL is staying with us for a few days, apparently because FIL is away. I'm not sure why she is with us as she seems fine after her op (she has resumed driving etc), and I suspect she is worried about me and DH and is on a spying mission. I admit I may be paranoid . DH did nothing to help this by getting in two hours later than he said he would last night, then disappearing upstairs for 20 minutes, despite me calling him repeatedly for dinner. When he eventually reappeared (MIL and I had eaten), he sat with his back to her while she tried to talk to him, didn't comment on whether the food was nice, then disappeared into the living room to watch TV. MIL and I joined him after clearing up and she suggested we watch something, which he proceeded to be rude about for the duration. Then he disappeared upstairs again. I gave up and went to bed.

I spoke to him about it this morning, saying his behaviour was rude and embarrassing. I also pointed out that other men do not behave like this (as this is his usual reply), as we have seen how other men behave in their homes thanks to our travels over the summer. He is apologetic and vowing to do better. I am sure you are as fed up of hearing this as me.

He is also going out at the weekend and staying out for the night. A friend of ours from uni is down. I am not allowed to go. DH has claimed that it is a boys night out, when I know that other partners are going (and I also know this person as we went to the same uni). I know he doesn't want me to go. I am upset about this. He thinks I am being unreasonable in a) wanting to go, and b) being upset about him saying that I can't.

I am sorry for venting this all here. I am at my wits end. I am miserable. He takes pretty much all the enjoyment out of my life and contributes hardly anything. I don't know what to do.

Reading this back, I have to make a decision about my and the DDs future, and I need to do this away from MN, FB etc. I do not want to be that woman who complains about her DH all the time, but I cannot continue living like this.

Thank you my lovely MN group for making me see this. I will be back when I am clearer about what the future holds.

science I think you are right by your description above, there is something very wrong with your DH. Can he be depressed? I do agree you have a big choice to make, hope you have someone you can talk to in RL, after or before your big thinking. We will be thinking about you and hopefully giving you strength!

The doctor appointment is normal here (kids have to be free of parasites, microbes and colds to start school)

SR take care. Big hugs

mous I'm sure that if my DS was to be tested he'll to be with a speech delay

Big hugs SR Your DH's behaviour certainly does not sound 'normal' (although my exP would refuse to come and sit to dinner for hours on end and then give me the silent treatment if I pulled him up on it) and you have every right to expect to be asked on his night out and also to be upset that he is excluding you. Please draw on all your RL support, I'm sure you have friends and family who will do everything they can to help.

rainbow great that PT is going so well I must admit I haven't tried a sticker chart for DD1, I expect I should at least give that a go. She did a massive, wet, smelly poo in her knickers while at a group yesterday. She did seem upset at the time, but when we talked about it later and I asked if she'd rather have done it on the potty or toilet she said no. And breathe.

DD1 drinks a lot of milk, she has one or two 200ml beakerfuls at breakfast and at dinner and if she asks for milk at other times I will give me some if we have enough. I do wonder if she doesn't eat very well because she drinks too much milk.

Mous that speech delay but you know that they all develop at different rates, and especially that more than one language causes delay, and how many will your DD2 speak - three?! And the paed. is not worried which is great. And she loves her kindergarden - time off for you! Yay! What did you do with it?

stoof thinking of you.

I have tried the early lunch/nap again and it has worked again!!! I must get outside and do some weeding before they wake up.

sr that certainly paints things in a different light, it's odd and cold behaviour all round rather than just inconsiderate husband/father :( I think you've been going round in circles a bit lately so it some distance will help you come to some resolution then good luck.

DD seems better, slept more than usual yesterday and ate a lot less which is to be expected but otherwise seemed to have a normal amount of energy. However DH is feeling rough and I was just sick, so need to watch for DS. He had a very unsettled night (every hour) but I suspect teething there as he is attempting to chew whatever part of my body he can get hold off.

mous glad she likes kindergarden, could she rub some of that off on DD please?

DD hasn't really had milk since she weaned at 14ish months, although has oat milk on her breakfast and sometimes has half a beaker of oatmilk/chocolate oatmilk.

IC has DH started now?

I was never sick bar drinking events and since DS I've had four sickness events.

SR

CP I hope you all getting better

Is there a growth spurt around 2&1/2 years old? DS is eating so much at the present, it makes me wonder...

I think I feel human again, yesterday wasn't fun but luckily I had the foresight to tell DH to come home at 2pm as 3-6pm was my roughest period. Never been sick when there was nothing left before, very unsettling. DH had nausea about 12 hours before I did but nothing came of it and obviously very thankful DD was only sick a few times and not like I was. Now wait and see for DS.

I don't think DS is advanced mobility wise, I think he's average. It's hard to tell as obviously DD has been walking for a couple of months by now and went through the stages so much quicker.

Sent DH to work and children are in nursery this afternoon so only a few hours to go.

I think at this point growth spurts feel a lot more random wrt to age but they still have them.

stoof how's things?

SB not sure about growth spurts (DD2 just shot up in august), DD1 almost stopped growing from 2.5 till 4. The pead. said to me once that after 3 it is 5/6 cm/year until puberty, so smoother growth than before 2. But I do some children that will concentrate those 6 cm in a few months (usually summer )

CP sorry you are all sick. Can't believe your DS is past 8 months already...

May be I am an horrible mum and my children can't wait to get away from me... Seriously, DD2 is not a nursery she is at "school". She has a teacher for the little class, one for spanish, one for french, she also has guitar and dance and in the early morning they are all mixed up from 2 yo till 6 yo for a bit of language/writing and gym. She is also used to her sister going to school so it is natural for her. So no real advice, I don't think I did something.

She skipped all the way to school and cried when I pick her up (because she wanted to have a nap with her friends ....) exactly like DD1 did with her playschool in the UK I seem to have the only children in the world who don't want to go back home with me