July 2010 - Next thread, cba to think of a title

[Chulita]

I want to witter away to you lot and none of you have come up with the goods so this will have to do...

Got confused there for a moment about what you would be trying dh [hgrin]

Ignore me. As you were.

I meant to say earlier but got distracted by showing off my children I'm pleased you're feeling calmer tonight. Your husband speaks wise words, it will all fit together nicely once the baby arrives.

Good luck dh

dh I have now got into a habit of feeding J (bf) when he wakes at 5.30 or so in his room, and he then (normally) goes happily back in his cot for another 2 or even 3 hours. I feel a bit bad that it's a 'night feed' which I know he doesn't need, but frankly I'm much happier doing that than I was getting up with him at 6.30am or so. If it works for you, I'd say don't knock it. The one thing I would say is that if you do try feeding him in his room and putting him back in his cot at that hour, make sure you have a blanket at hand to snuggle up in when feeding - it's too cold otherwise!

trudy, glad you're feeling a bit happier. It WILL work out - people say it is hard for the first few weeks or even months, but it does get easier. Some people even go on to have a third! How hard can it be?

sorry you've had such a crap evening cake. wassup? tricky bedtime or somethign else?

have just got home from a 3+ hour committee meeting. dull...

warning: me post coming up... my two are so crap and weird at the mo

A - so shit at sleeping it's untrue. she's def teething like a maniac and in with us for part of the night, every night. i have neither the heart nor energy to be strict with her and am praying it'll feel easier once her teeth are thru but the relentless fucking tiredness which has been going on for months is doing me in now. she's an absolute treasure in the day thankfully so that's something.

F - just so bloody silly. not even naughty or argumentative, just soooo annoyingly silly, scatty and hyper. on the other hand, he's doing some really odd but clever things - he seems to be just learning stuff at the rate of knots - eg he suddenly knows what letter his friends names begin with and is able to 'read' capital letters which i've only mentioned once. i know this sounds like nothing to worry about but he just doesn't seem the same as my friend's toddlers iyswim?

anyway, i was telling dh about about it last night, saying i was a bit worried and that he'd done my head in that day and then when i collected him from nursery, his key worker said almost the exact same thing ie 'he's very clever and is way ahead with reading etc but acts so silly - eg you tell him to lie on the bed and he immediately lies on the floor' i could tell she was feeling really worn out with him which made me feel sad because i obv want them to like him

maybe, it's just 'him' or a phase - what do you think?

The silliness sounds totally normal for a 3 year old cake. A likes to make up silly jokes and run around saying "Bum poo wee!" etc etc.

i've probably not explained it v well wss, i know they all can be silly but it's like he's in his own scatty world a lot of the time where he just does random things instead of what i've asked him to do or he's staring into space rather than being focused on what's going on.

it was the fact that his key worker was making such a point of it (given she's worked with tons of children of a similar age) that's worrying me a bit. e.g. he keeps wetting himself at nursery (rarely does at home) and it's just because he's being so silly and unfocused. today he did it standing right next to the loo at nursery

i;m not sure i can explain it any better but i know it seems different to my friends children who have funny moments or are naughty but not this kind of silliness/lack of focus that F shows. i must have said 'F, calm down' about 100 times yesterday, no joke.

i was just talking to dh on the phone about it and got a bit upset - more cos he was being dismissive and kept saying 'well, he's only 2' but during the convo i did remember that my parents have described me as a small child v similarly to how F seems. i remember my mother even said that i was a real handful but not actually naughty at all (and i was an early reader too, funnily enough) so maybe we're just v similar. if so, i will look forward to flicking thru fabric samples with him

ssorry - huge waffle. just getting it out really.

that's great re the cows tsc. thank you - you've put a huge grin back on my face

cake doesnt sound easy in your house atm. A's sleeping sounds similar to D's. I have finally got up after being awake and out of bed on and off since 3.18!! 3.18...........isnt it funny how u remember precice times. it really is starting to take the piss, i can hear his tummy rumbling and he seems to be trying to pass wind or poo, i know he has been on a limited diet for over a week now so thinking it was hunger i got 4oz in the hope it would settle him but no. So i sat with him and he just lay with his eyes open, staring. Every time i put him down he cried. I went back in for a third time and stayed till 6 and now we are sat on the sofa watching some shite, im soooooooooooo tired and dh is out all day and evening and to top it all i still feel like shite. this cant go on can it? dh said he was going to buy a travel cot and put him downstairs.

Cake I can relate on the not getting much sleep front. I hope A gets those teeth v soon!

D was awake from my last post til midnight, then he woke at 2 and 5:20 and he didn't really settle again so I've had a grand total of 5 broken hours sleep and I can't see straight I'm so tired.
Why is waking up and staying wide awake for 2 hour periods?!

Hah! viksam your DH sounds like mine re cot downstairs! Fwiw S has been ill for over 2 weeks now and he's up really early and won't resettle. He's also got no appetite in the evening and I think part of the problem is that he's hungry around 4.30 and just can't get back to sleep. I'm just waiting for the cold/cough to go and hopefully he'll get back to normal. I feel for you on the knackeredness front, just take it easy today if you can.

cake L is a bit different to F but still very difficult. She can't read anything apart from about 8 letters and still mixes up counting to 10. She's more of the openly disobedient type though, like lying on the floor instead of sitting on the bed, dropping her spoon on the floor right after I've asked her not to, flatly ignoring me when I ask her to do something, often whilst staring right at me to see what I'm going to do about it. She drives me round the bend...but I know she's normal, I see worse children at the groups we go to and thank my stars that even if sometimes she's worse behaved, at least she's better looking

dh S has started doing that, DH remembers L doing it too so it might be just a thing they do. It will get better, it absolutely will, the harder you work at it the quicker it'll happen but it still might not be quick.

trudy your DP's right, and if he knows how much you've struggled, hopefully he'll be good and supportive once the baby gets here too. Glad you felt better last night, very exciting! (I thought the same as you re dh's post!)

tsc I saw your "I found 3 harder than 2" and was prepared to completely ignore your post and then realised you meant age, not number of dc. I agree absolutely, L gets harder the older she gets!

We've got a fun morning of supermarket shopping planned, followed by something else. The big news is that I walked to the singing group and back yesterday and didn't flake out on the sofa - first time in 3.5 months that I've had the energy to even attempt to walk, let alone get there and back!

So im back to uber analysing what i feed him in the day can i beg ur indulgence whilst i give his meals a quick run down, im convinced its something im doing!
Breakfast
Half round of toast, probably doesnt eat it all
Yog
cut up Fruit,

Snack mid morning
Raisins or cheddars or yog

Lunch
differes every day but something cold and light, this is the meal i struggle with the most, his favorite is eggy bread, also have ham, cheese, bread sticks with philly dip, pitta, cheese on toast, he seems to go on and off things quite fast really for lunch.
Yog

Afternoon snack
same as morning

Dinner/tea or what ever its called!
Sausage or fish fingers, beans, mash
Cottage pie
Chicken dinner
Havent got onto pasta or rice yet but want to
Fruit pot

Has water through out the day and around 6oz of milk twice a day morning and before bed.

This morning hes dont two of those horrid light hard poos and a lot of it too, that could explain the horrendous night.

I so sorry, im so self consumed atm, im just really wrapped up in it all, sickness, pregnancy. lack of sleep, difficult D, keeping work/house/DH etc happy, its all a bit much really, I had to tell DH this morning, i cant rake through last night in detail, it seems that its always woe is him and its not its just a situation that we all have to deal with most of all D, the poor boy!

I'm going to have a sofa day for as long as I can manage today then might take D to the park to use his energy, im surprised he's even got any.

Morning all!
Well I know im late on the names but cakes I love Caspar but DH hated it and Caspian is the name if the local Turkish chippy! Love Fabian, we had so many names for L, and when I found he was a boy they all got scrapped and even when in labour we had a list of about 8 names he could be at one point he was going to be Dexter or Otis then DH went weird adnd went against them, if he was a girl he was going to be Eden Freya but ince then seen so many chavvy Edens!

trudyla grat your starting to feel a bit better about everything!
dh how did you get on last night? I agree about not letting him in your bed.

What does everyone give their babies for breakfast? L wont be fed anymore so porridge is out, he nibbles a tiny bit of toast then throws it away and has a few raisins so he is hardly eating at all in the morning. DH keeps giving him a bottle in the night if he cries for more than 2 mins, I dont know how to get him out the habit or if I should just let him tol we move in 2 weeks as it will be more unsettling happening then too?

I got the lamp! and a 4 slice toaster (no standing around for me anymore) and a kettle! chulita I know kettles arent too expensive but its the fact my old one still worked, but it was £15 off so I bought it plus I had visions of me being 80 with the same kettle

Memphis- it wasn't a good night I'll just say that lol.
I give D cereal or fruit usually. This morning he had a banana, some raisins and he shared my scone.

memphis I'm the same, I'd love a bigger tv but our 26" works fine so I can't justify it even though it would be nice to go a bit bigger!
I give S shreddies, soak them in milk for a bit and then let him eat them by hand/spoon.

viks doesn't sound anything wrong with what you're giving him, very similar to what my two eat. Only difference is that S pretty much just has tuc crackers with philly for lunch, I've got no imagination!

For breakfast J normally has cereal - atm we have a variety of cereals in, some of which are sugary (for various convoluted reasons): Weetabix bitesize, Shredded Wheat bitesize, Cheerios, Raisin Wheats, normal Weetabix. He likes most of those. At nursery he often has cornflakes or rice crispies. He eats them with his hands quite happily. He also eats porridge with his hands! The trouble is J always wants what I have for breakfast - so if I have toast he has to have toast too.

Morning all! M usually has breakfast at nursery where I think they just do porridge or cereal memphis. M is good with cutlery though so doesn't have any problems serving herself. We're going to try her with soup this weekend, for a challenge. [insane]

At weekends for breakfast it varies a lot. Sometimes porridge or cereal, but we often do pancakes or waffles, sometimes cream cheese and smoked salmon bagels, sometimes eggy bread or french toast, sometimes croissants or muffins or crumpets or cinnamon buns. A real mixed bag!

I'll be ignoring all the comments about 3 year olds being more of a handful than 2 year olds, as we're planning DC2 when M is 3 and gets her free hours.

A quick query... Are there any other LOs that aren't talking yet? M has yet to say any proper words. She's fairly quiet in general but occasionally babbles to herself. However we've had no meaningful words and she just tends to gesture or sign ("More!") when she wants something. I think her hearing is ok though, she seems to understand when I ask her to do simple things.

If you'll indulge a whine, my week isn't improving. :( Got a bill for £1000 for the car service as various bits needed changing. It'll eat away at our savings that we can't afford to replenish at the moment. [mutter mutter grumble]

I dont see that as 'trouble' woods its good that he eats anything isnt it.
I tried D with some ready break this morning, he pulled a face but had a good 6-7 spoons full.
Im gona go to the next village this morning, i really can not hang round the house for another day, i dont feel well still but i think if i get out i'll feel better and D will enjoy the fresh air i recon. He went straight to sleep as soon as his head hit the pillow at 8.45, not at all suprising really is it.
chu hope ur shopping trip goes ok, i really dont know how u cope with getting up at those times and having a challenging (but beautiful) 3yo to handle, i feel ashamed that im so self absorbed.
memp good for u for the lamp and the toaster.
D's sat up and crying after only 40mins, really thoght hed have longer, he may resettle, I knew i should have had a shower but i need to see what happenes to the bloke with his feet trapped on helicopter heros, even though its turning my stomach!

Oh viks, you're not remotely self-absorbed! Seriously, I'd rather look after L all day than go to work, at least with L I can give her some pens/paper/glitter glue and lie on the sofa feeling sorry for myself, you can't do that at work! Some of the hours you've been doing lately I just couldn't do, simple as that. I think you're doing brilliantly tbh!

spirael S isn't a big talker, he says 'no' all the time and variations of 'dis' but isn't very noisy. He's got over 30 signs he uses all the time but he's not very vocal.

I agree, totally not self-absorbed vik, you rant away!

Vik, my boys eat more than that, but as we know from this thread, they're all very different. If he has an issue with texture (you mentioned he's not keen on some things before) would your health visitor pop out to give you some advice or is she rubbish? They definitely have more on a morning, that's for sure. The other meals may be similar but it depends on portion sizes.

My boys eat the same, pretty much same sized portions too:
DS2 has a 7 or 8oz bottle when he gets up and half a banana (DS1 has the other half in his fruit salad - banana, satsuma, grapes and strawberries)
Breakfast: I try to stick to a bowl of porridge oats with full fat milk or one whole weetabix with full fat milk. Occassionally they'll have rice crispies but I try to stick to the stodge healthier breakfasts to fill them up. I avoid ready break as I find it a rip off and stick to plain scottish rolled oats.
Snack: toast usually.
Lunch: tends to be a quick/on the go food such as a cheese sandwhich if we're out. Or omlette with cheese, mushrooms, whatevers in the fridge really if we're in the house. Or a slice of cheese on toast (but it's homemade bread so the slices are pretty thick)
Afternoon snack are hit and miss, breadsticks/crackers/whatever really.
Tea: Listing the things they've had this week: spag bol with wholeweat pasta / fish pie and veg / Linda McCartney country pie with veg and chips / tagliatelle with homemade cheese sauce with mushrooms, sweetcorn, broccoli, peas and I can't rememebr what else I put in it and they'll have a snack tonight as they'll have something at nursery at 3:15pm. Then they have some custard/a yoghurt and then fruit (again!)
DS2 has a 8 or 9oz bottle right before he goes to bed. DS1 has a cup of milk about 5:30pm

My only other thoughts are what times does he eat? I find ds2 needs to eat between 4.30pm and 5pm in order for it to be not too late that he's starving and 'past it' but not too close to bedtime so he still drinks a full bottle of milk. Because he wants his tea at that time, they eat luch 11.30/12noon (nursery start lunches at 11.15 ) and their breakfast is usually 8am ish

Oh and as for being silly cake. My God, yes ds1 is incredibly silly. In all seriousness I didn't read anything in your post that stood out to me as different from the others. I too spend a vast proportion of my day, espacially the closer I get to bedtime, saying 'calm down'.

And I totally get why you're upset by the nursery worker. Just before ds1 left nursery for that time, every time I picked him up they would tell me 'he's been a monkey today mum' and it would make me really upset. Mostly because he is known there as A Good Boy and I didn't want people to think differently of him, but also because my defence mechanism kicked in and I went into Protective Mama Bear mode and didn't want to hear anyone say a bad word against him.

It is a phase. You will be debating soft furnishings before you know it

spirael M is babbling all the time but no proper words yet, unless you count Dada, which is mainly DP, but also me, the cat, the cm, grandparents and whoever else crosses her way. I don't think it's anything to worry about. Most of her RL "friends" aren't talking yet either.

viks It must be very hard for you, esp. with feeling poorly and all. I'll have to say it again, your DH sounds not very empathetic. How can he moan, when you've been up with D all night? [hangry]

This was M's meal plan yesterday:

breakfast
-6 oz milk
-toast with almond butter and jam
-ca. 10 grapes

snack
-three quarters of a jar of pureed fruit

lunch (which is our big meal, since we are all eating it together)
-ginger and hoi sin pork steak (she had a piece maybe the size of her hand) with broccoli, green beans and rice
-half an orange

snack:
-apple

dinner
-1 slice of wholemeal bread with tuna
-half a red pepper
-half a banana

She also has about 300-400ml of water

HTH

memph I know what you mean about buying new stuff when the old stuff still works. I struggle with it, but once I get new, shiny things, I get very excited.
How cool, only two more weeks till you move. Are you looking forward to it?

cake God, that sounds pretty shit round your way. I hope things improve soon. It's reassuring though, that you might have been the same when you were little, isn't it. Cos you turned out alright [hgrin]

I think this is the biggest parenting hurdle (for me anyway). The thought, that everything we are doing wrong at the moment, is gonna fuck'em up forever ruin their lives and there is no coming back. I'm trying hard to reassure myself, that everything's a phase and children are much more resilient than most parenting books are giving them credit for. Yes, I'm talking to you Miss motherfucking babywhisperer with your bloody accidental parenting shit

So, cake if you're still with me [hhmm] try not to worry about something being wrong with him. It's a phase, all kids are different, and your nursery worker should have not let a, probably personal, bad day out on you and tell you she's worried. There. [hsmile]

No news here.

See ya all later.

Your biggest hurdle trude, is that you think things like 'everything we are doing wrong at the moment'. You aren't doing anything wrong my lovely, and certainly nothing that will ruin her life!!!! Please, try to stop worrying. I absolutely know that's easy for me to say and not easy for you to do, but you are a good, caring parent. She will turn out Just Fine :)