Sept 08- The threenagers have arrived - Advanced negotiating and crowd control skills required

[DebiTheScot]

Sorry Meglet if you wanted to start the thread with your title but I thought I'd best do it while there was still one space to post the link to this one on the last one.

Glad the investigation went OK meglet
Best wishes for the rest of pregnancy MrsArch

A has refused a nappy for most of the last 10 nights, and hasn't wet the bed for over a week! Only issue is he feels the need to wake me up and tell me he needs a wee rather than going straight to the potty (light is on in the bathroom, I'm next door to it), I think because he wants help getting tucked in after. I'm going to rotate his duvet so it's tucked under the end of the bed instead of the side, which should help him be able to pull it up himself, seeing as he isn't falling out of bed.

He probably does drink 2L a day but his food is mostly breadlike with little fluid, so juice/smoothie provides most of his fruit and veg. He usually has about 2 sippy cups of milk around bedtime and during the night, though it's water after that. Yes, he wants to live on bread and milk. I tell him he's not a hedgehog. :)

NC A sounds like my ds1!!!

Aarghh! Bloomin' clocks going back. The kids were running riot at 6:30 GMT. My tolerance levels will be very low today.

They're currently building a den with the sofa cushions and blankets so I hope it keeps them happy for .....ooo.... 5 mins .

meglet poor you. What I find helps (though not needed today as C had a bloody lie in!!) Is to ignore the time change and keep time to BST until, say, 9am and then put the clocks back then and carry on as normal. Saves the pain of early waking.

mrsA I did think changing the clocks last night seemed pointless, like the children were ever going to understand it . My DSIS is coming round later for her goodbye party, she flies to Russia tomorrow then hops on the Trans-Siberian express on Tuesday, then China, Oz, NZ and the States, and back on Easter Day! She can make the most of her last couple of hours with the kids so I can have a break .

We haven't done too badly with the clocks, I think because Robyn did her usual trick of waking about 2-3am and keeping me awake for an hour or so. we managhed to lie in until 8.15 which hardly ever happens. She did have a late night at a halloween party which she loved

meglet glad you survived the colonoscopy - when do you get the results from the biopsies?

NC tres impressed at the night-time toilet training. Having been dry for nearly a year now in the daytime, DS shows no sign of staying dry overnight or wanting to go without a nappy. In fact, won't go to the loo on his own...insists on having his trousers and pants pulled down and being lifted on to the toilet.

mrsA anymore twinges?

Am 16 weeks today and have had a weekend of baby talk - came out to an NCT friend on Friday. Went to a baby shower where I saw more friends that I couldn't hide my bump from any longer. And then a halloween party yesterday where I was one of two pregnant witches.

NCT friend is going to pass on her bugaboo bee to me as was really hoping to get a rear-facing buggy for the first 6 months. DS was such a clingy baby - he really struggled being in the Maclaren for the first 4 months. And the wilkinet just wasn't as user friendly as I thought it would be, so didn't use it so much - so same friend has offered to dig out her karime!

In other news we have been blown out by yet another mortgage provider. No one wants to lend us money because both DH and I are self-employed - despite paying all our bills on time and having a fair chunk of money in savings (they don't know its for my ML). We only have 13 years left on our mortgage and the fixed term rate has run out - so we wanted to borrow a little more in order to do some work round the house. But computer says no. It's very frustrating.

DG Have you tried a broker?? London and Country were very good we found.....

How frustating dg . Wish I knew a bit about money and could suggest something useful.

How did we get to November? Only a month 'til the advent calendars are up.

dg TBH I'm not sure when I get my results. I'll chase them up in a couple of weeks if I haven't heard anything.

Better get dressed for work / school / nursery then .

meg I know! November!! Only 4 weeks til move!!!

I have a really exciting day of washing, ironing, and cleaning ahead of me

Anyone know much about working from home??

Have applied for a job which involves ringing NHS patients to remind them about their hospital appts....I have worked for the NHS before but never worked from home...its 2 hours per day but not sure how I can fit it round the dc....any advice/tips??

Thanks bec will ask DH to give them a call. It's annoying because our house is worth three times our mortgage, so you'd think lenders would be falling over themselves to use it as security - yet it looks like we'd find it easier just renewing the mortgage as it stands and then getting the extra money as an unsecured loan with a much higher interest rate.
The ringing round job sounds fairly flexible...I imagine you could do an hour in the morning and then an hour in the afternoon. Is ds2 in pre-school yet? Or will he sit and watch a film/fave programme for an hour?

Sorry I've not been around for ages. Full time work has had the most annoying impact on my MNing time!

I'll try to answer a couple of posts.

bec Working form home is easier if it's emailing rather than phoning. Email you can start an stop and nobody hears CBeebies and kids screaming in the background. Phone calls can be difficult for that reason. The number of times I have put the phone down just as I've rung because suddenly there is crying... But if you are the type whose kids have a regular sleep time it could be fine. And two hours isn't much.

dg I can't believe you can't get a mortgage. We used these brokers twice, once for our house in York and then again when we moved away from the area. Maybe worth a call?

As for us - we are loving the new house! Kids are loving the new nursery. I'm loving the new job. Everyone is much happier. Except I need to find a cleaner, desperately. Only problem is I can't have anyone around to look as the place is a complete tip - what would they think?

Its does seem quite flexible...there are 3 options during the day to do the 2 hour stint.

Hmmm...

Good to hear from you FP, glad you love the new house, we should be in ours by xmas!!! x

Hi everyone, sorry for radio silence, been on holiday!

meglet well done you on surviving the horrid experience of the colon thingy, sounds ghastly. Hope all is well on the results front.

Fanny good to hear life is treating you well! I'm considering a cleaner for one of those one-off post builder cleans you can get but I'm worried they'll expect me to clear out under the beds etc!

kagey :( how are things going?

dg that's great that you're 16 weeks and although its nervewracking going public I hope you start to enjoy the feeling too :)

bec wow house move so soon! Good point about the advent calendars too...

We had a lovely holiday in Norfolk for my parents Ruby wedding. My dBro, dSIL and dnephew were there too, it was the best equipped cottage we've ever stayed in, and there was an outside pool, hot tub, sauna and pool table. We did loads of day trips and eating out, two boat rides and whole day on the beach, it was glorious. DH didn't get any phone calls from work, and I quite enjoyed the break from the internet!

DS2 had his first jabs this morning. He didn't cry for too long which was good. He's loads better at settling for naps, although I still have to feed him back to sleep 45mins into his lunch time nap to get the full 2 hours out of him. He still falls asleep on the school run, better get him out of the buggy soon, he's now had another 2 hours since the 2 hours at lunch time!

DS1 is in the most negative phase at the moment - is anyone else's 3yo doing this? I don't want my , I don't want my lunch, I don't want to go to gym club. The stupid thing is he does want all these things, and will still sit up and eat his lunch/play happily at gym club/with his toys etc. Its just like a default mode that he has to say "I don't want to" to absolutely everything I say, its driving me potty!

carrie ooohhhhh yeeesssss. We certainly are! Its fun, isnt it?

Yep Carrie. Ds kept saying he didn't like pre school, yet he happily walked there with a spring in his step and enjoys being there. But if anyone asked him about it, he would say 'I don't like pre school'. It was almost like a default setting.

I tried talking it through with him, but that didn't make any difference. So I then just ignored him when he said it or said 'never mind', and it did stop. I know that sounds harsh, but I felt comfortable doing/saying it because I knew he was enjoying pre school.

Hi carrie! Yes, DD does this thing where she screams and sobs for something, like 'I want a cu-u-u-udle!' (in a melodramatic, hyperventilating kind of way, of course).... while she is actually getting a cuddle.

Hello all - good to hear from you all. Sounds like things are going well FP, digi and carrie.

I am 38 weeks today and have my homebirth pack in the house! Including some drugs in the fridge! Just some syntocin for PPH I think. Birth pool partially blown up and a nice box of biccies in the house.
Feeling good and so glad we've paid for an IM as this is so different from last time. I am so relaxed and calm.
The IM reckoned my period pain last week was a sign things were starting to soften. Baby is at least 2/5 engaged, head down and she reckons around 7lbs.
She casually mentioned she trained 20 years ago under Sheila Kitzinger, so I really have landed on my feet with her!

C is being fab most days but is soooo slooowwwww. She gets a bit upset going to pre-school room of the nursery. Now if we get there nice and early around 8.15, she gets to be dropped off in the 2 yr olds room, which she loves. They then walk the pre-schoolers to their room around 8.30.
I have explained till I am blue in the face that if she wants to go to the 2 yr olds room, she has to eat breakfast quickly and not mess about. Otherwise, she will go straight to the pre-school room.
It just does not sink in. She has to get a bowl and spoon and bib for Minnie Mouse, then eats her breakfast at snail's pace, then cries when I explain we might not make it to the 2 yr old room!
I simply cannot work out a way to help her understand.

Oh and she frequently hates nursery and wants me to stay with her, yet ends up having 2nds of lunch and doesn;t want to leave when I pick her up.

Thank you all for your reassuring words, you don't know how much it means to me!

mrsA your DD is so similar to mine who's now 4 1/2. Everyday she complains about cycling home from school as she's "too tired" when she's just been skipping through the playground quite happily. I can say it til I'm blue in the face that if she just rides we'll be home sooner and she'll by playing quicker but its turning into this long drawn out affair every day. I think I'll say if she cycles home without complaining every day next week then i'll put a form in for the 'stars at home' bit they do on a Friday. I totally feel your pain over the breakfast issue!

I've just found fab thinsulate gloves for the DCs in H&M, also a scarf for DD (struggling to find a scarf that isn't part of a hat and gloves set). They also have Hello Kitty ski gloves, the height of playground chic

Robyn moans about nursery as well. She wasn't keen on moving to pre-school and most mornings will say she doesn't want to go. she does love it though so we just drop her off and turn and run go. It sounds harsh but she is always happy 5 mins after and she enjoys it lots. She is also a ditherer so we never get there for 8am.

ooohhhh...dont mention nursery!

Toby still getting really stressed/anxious/distressed when I mention it.

They rang today re: when would he be starting back and I told them about the house move etc but, honestly, I cant see him going after xmas either

Thing is, I dont work so cant justify leaving a vomiting/hysterical child at nursery when he doesnt really need to be there IYSWIM? Or rather when I dont need to be anywhere.

Sigh. God, its so hard to know what to do.

Am thinking that come september I will have to enrol him for 5 mornings a week....that will give him a year til school and he will get used to it more quickly (?)

It was different with ds1 - who also hated it at first - he went 5 mornings a week from the go but is a summer baby and so only had 18 months til he started school which made it a bit more time sensitive.

Someone, anyone, got any advice???

becaroo that is a hard one cos, like you say, you don't need him to be at nursery and I know I feel guilty for working some days when C doesn't want to go to nursery.
I'm keeping her in nursery 3 days a week even though I'm on maternity leave from Friday. I will see how it goes as I can't use the 'mummy has got to go to work now' line.

It's your decision but it sounds like he's not ready. Do you want him to go? If so, see how he is over xmas and try talking to him about it but if all else fails you either have to grit your teeth and do it or accept it's not for him yet and wait will Easter or even Sept.

I don't have answers really but it's amazing how they change in a short space of time. A few weeks ago, C wouldn't dress herself, now it's all she wants to do.

Typically I am a few weeks away from baby and about to finish work and I'm getting a stonking cold :(

sounds familiar carrie - A is doing a lot of 'don't want go to nursery' equalled only by 'don't want go home' depending on the time of day. And 'don't want nuffink'... I think he's really tired from the excitement of pre-school, and has a bit of lingering snuffles.

The preschoolers have breakfast in with the toddlers and he often likes staying there for a bit - though other days he's desperate to be a big preschooler. Luckily there's lots of spaces at the moment as some children aren't starting for another month or two after the sept clearout, so they're picking their battles and letting him go mostly to whatever room he wants - and working on the No Hitting and No Snatching which is his annoying feature of the month...

digi hope a mortgage broker can help you. I spent five hours on the phone yesterday sorting out house insurance eventually via the third broker I was put through to, because our insurers got new underwriters and wouldn't cover a house with a tenant in the granny flat... I have rarely been so glad to finally offer someone my money! Was particularly miffed when the first lot told me that their insurance wouldn't cover us at all but would I like to take it anyway?!

bec IME working from home is totally incompatible with a small child - MrNC and I have done it in shifts when snow closed nursery, but it really doesn't work except in emergencies when you get some slack. A is fine with me or daddy not being there, but being in the house and refusing to socialise... MrNC has to do telecons at 10am each day and has to hide up in the loft until it's done so A doesn't realise he's in the house! Might have been better when A had predictable naps, though, or just two hours worth of work.

Good news is I'm feeling a fair bit better this week, and able to walk pretty well. Bad news is of course I therefore have to go back to work after next week. Oh well, how bad can a month be in the runup to Christmas and having the whole family here (3 3yos, one 18mo, me 7mo pregnant, ILs at least one night, my parents coming for the day, possibly another SIL and the dog...)?

mrsa Thanks, you have said exactly what I think!!! Going to wait til Sept I think...better tell nursery He is obv not ready. Am now feeling anxious about next year...he needs to go next year to prepare him for school!!!! AArghhh....

I think its a great idea to leave C in nursery for a few days whilst you are on ML...Ds1 was at school when I had Toby and it really helped me bond with him and I had lots of 1-1 time with him which was lovely as I feel both boys got lots of 1-1 attention in the early months/years.

Hope the cold buggers off soon!

NC Yeah....thats what worries me!!! Toby does sleep atm but how long for??? sigh.

marking my place...

Happy maternity leave MrsA