March 2005 part 3 - Support for the sleep obsessed!

[bonym]

Which of course, we all are

Hi everyone,

Jambot - I do hope that you are feeling better now.

JoPG - Congatulations to Freya, I think this is our first tooth on the March thread

Popsy - I hope your blood pressure comes down and you feel better soon.

Motherpeculiar - I hope we see more of you on this thread , I was due on the 29th of March but had my son on the 10th of April. I decided to stay on this thread rather than change to the April thread.

Leogaela - Yes, I am hoping for one.

I took Kieran to the child minder today for the first time and was very suprised at how calm I was. I think thinking about it was more scary than actualy doing it. He was so happy when I picked him up. She has 4 kids, all in school and all wanting to cuddle him when they got home. They are such a happy and lovely family, if he was not mine I would have thought he was their little brother.

He went to music group this morning and loved it .

Can babies our age get separation anxiety ??????

Harrison has started screaming the minute he can't see me, which is seriously draining. Not even DH can comfort him, although he will shush for DD for a few minutes. He's also started getting really stressy at bedtime, waking 2-3 times before I go to bed and crying and only I can soothe him back to sleep, he goes mental if DH tries Where has my lovely happy and contented little boy gone?

Bonym, we are also night feeding again, anywhere between 1 and 3am. He's been waking for a few nights and it's been taking me literally hours to get him back to sleep. So Saturday night when he woke at 1.00, I just couldn't get him back to sleep, so fed him. He drained a 4oz bottle in about 5 minutes flat, then went back to sleep until 6. Had another 8oz bottle and went back to sleep until 8.15 when he got up and had a huge bowl of porridge. Last night, he woke at 2.45 and drained a bottle again and did the same at 6. Wouldn't go back to sleep though so an early start for us.

I think he might be having a growing spurt (do they get them at this age?) as he is eating for England at the moment. As well as his morning bottles, today he has had a bowl of porridge, 4oz bottle before lunch, chicken casserole followed by rice pudding for lunch and a few more ounces of milk as he cried once it was all gone, another bottle at 4.00pm, vegetables in cheese sauce for tea followed by custard and his bottle before bedtime. If the little monster wakes tonight and wolfs down a bottle like he has the past two nights, I'm going to wonder if he's got hollow legs all of a sudden

Good luck at work LG and hope you're better soon Popsy

Popsy - - hope you feel better soon.

Motherpeculiar - glad to hear that the sleep problems are resolving (was lurking on your thread ). Good to see you on here - as Norash says, not all the babies here were born in March (misdee's dd3 was Feb, and I think shaalaa's ds - shaalaa, correct me if i'm wrong!)

Glad that the childminder is working out well Norash - it must be a great relief to you that Kieran was happy there today.

Leogaela - glad the move went ok - you must be so pleased to be in finally. Hope work goes ok tomorrow, and that Niklas is fine at nursery.

How many babies are still feeding in the night please? I need to know that Grace is not the only one (well, I do know, but please tell me again!).

ga

harry is getting worse bonym

Bonym, our posts crossed. I'm in the night feeding gang with you again

busywizzy - Grace will also cry if she sees me leave the room, although usually only if she is tired or a bit grouchy. I seem to be the only one who can settle her at night too, dh does try but she only wants me most of the time. Hard isn't it? Poor dh gets a bit upset that he can't comfort her like I can, but I suppose it is inevitable - after all, we are the ones who are with them all day.

popsy - what a blow about your bp - will you have to be off work again? Poor you.

leogaela - congrats on the move - we did all that just over a year ago and the upheaval is still fresh in my memory!

busywizzy - also nightfeeding, but I'm doing this thing of doing 30 second feeds and then putting her down awake, and she seems to be ok with it. Mind you the rate she glugs she can get quite a lot in 30 seconds! She also seems to have hollow legs - was quite literally screaming for food this evening, ate an enormous pot of squash and pea, and then an equally enormous pot of apple, milk and baby rice, and then scoffed an enormous rice cake, and undoubtedly would have eaten more if I'd given her. But I was getting a bit worried about too much food too soon, since it's only a month since she started on solids. Mind you really I think they pace themselves, and they do definitely go through hungry phases, maybe when they're growing a lot, when they just need more.

Also can definitely get separation anxiety. Lots of books say not till 8-9 months, but that's rot. When I left dd1 at nursery at 5.5 months, she totally minded and knew I wasn't there and was distraught about it. And Iris objects if I'm not in view.

Did run number 7 of my newfound running career tonight, so celebrated with an extra large helping of chicken risotto cooked by dp, plus a slab of plum cake and double cream made by me at the weekend! Not the way to get rid of that post pregnancy bulge, but never mind.

Feeling much better, thanks all. Lauren hasn't had a feed at night since 13 weeks, but I think that's due to the bottle feeding. Although she eats fairly well, she just doesn't seem to have a massive appetite. I've been up to her two nights in a row now. Not sure what it is. It's a sort of low pitched moany cry - more like she's upset by a dream or something. She normally calms after I stroke her head a bit and do a bit of shhhing. Who knows?? At least with the hungry babies you know what the problem is.
I have been eating like a pig lately. It's really getting ridiculous. I've got to take myself in hand but every day that I decide that this is THE day to start, I stuff it up by dinner time. My will power is non-existant. Quite disgusted in myself. Haven't been able to wear my engagement ring since pregnant with Lauren, and still can't nearly 7 months later. GET A GRIP GIRL!!!!! DH has just bought a video camera, which means there's going to be lots of video evidence of myself which I don't really want to face

Harrison has been bottle fed since six weeks and he's all over the place at the moment with his sleeping. I keep thinking he's going to realise anyday now that he's bottle fed and therefore doesn't need to have a night feed but I'm still waiting On a positive note, sleep deprivation is excellent for eating habits as some days, I'm soooooooo tired, the thought of eating makes me feel physically sick I'd also rather catch up on sleep when he naps at lunchtime than eat lunch. Can't understand why I'm not six stone, which I most definately am not

Last night was another disaster and has dispelled my theory that Harrison is only waking as he's hungry. He went to bed at the usual time and for the first time in weeks, didn't wake at all before I went to bed BUT he woke at 12.30am, so I fed him on the basis that he might then sleep through. Ha, ha, ha - no such luck. He woke again at 3.30am and as I decided he couldn't possibly be hungry again, it took me an hour to settle him. He did then sleep through until 6.45 which is a lie-in for us and is now napping to catch up on all that lost sleep

I'm at a complete loss to know what to do - is he hungry, should I feed him ????? I'll give it another couple of nights, maybe it's 'just a phase'

Off to see my boss tomorrow about returning to work Fingers crossed that he doesn't want me back and has a big, fat cheque waiting for me.

Eyes propped with matchsticks here too. Grace woke at 2am for a feed (she's getting earlier - I'm sure that's not supposed to happen ) and seemed to be starving - had both boobs, whereas she'll usually only have one. Then woke again at 5am - managed to get her to settle (sort of) with her dummy but then she was properly awake again at 6am. Had a (smaller) feed and then decided she was up for the day. Dh (like a hero) got up with her so I managed to doze for another hour before he had to leave the house. Although I know she's still sleeping better than some, the trouble is I'm an 8hrs a night girl usually and am one of those people that is rubbish if I don't get my full quota. Not quite sure how I've managed to keep going this long!

Oooh, don't know if I should mention it, but DS (bottlefed) first slept through the night age 3! Whereas DD is breastfed and still in our bed and we manage a good night's sleep. So I know how much these babies can vary

We aren't having any more children. We had another baby between Dominic and Sylvia. Louis was stillborn and DH feels we've been through enough emotionally regarding births (Dominic had Apgar 2 at birth, needed resuscitation, I needed blood transfusions, then Sylvia being on a ventilator for a week). I'll be 40 next year, so I feel i can hang up my boots now and just enjoy the children I have.

anyone feeling broody....?

Broody ............... ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha

Bonym, it is exactly the same in our house and it's soul destroying isn't it. Harrison had just started sleeping through until 6.30, then he started waking a bit earlier at 5/5.30, then the odd night was 3.00, then 2.30, then 1.00 and last night 12.30 and 3.30. Broody, you must be mad

I keep wondering what I'm doing 'wrong' for it all to be going backwards the way it is but Harrison is in a good routine, naps regularly in his cot during the day (45 minutes am, 1.5/2 hours at lunchtime), regular bedtime routine, he settles himself to sleep always, feeds well etc. etc. so who knows what's going on in his little head that is causing him to be so unsettled at night

Deffo won't be having anymore as I don't think I could face this again when DD was so easy, I'm much older now and that definately makes the sleepless nights harder (I too am a huge fan of sleeping Bonym) and DH doesn't want anymore (well didn't want Harrison either but that's another story )

Harrison has just gone down for his lunchtime nap, having refused to eat any lunch so I'm off to catch up on some shut-eye too.

Cristina, I was sorry to read of your lost baby. How sad The two you have though are so gorgeous

Ok - so much for the bottle and sleeping through theory! Maybe I've just been lucky so far - long may it continue.
Christina - so sorry to hear about your little baby boy. That must have been very traumatic for you and so sad.
Regarding the broodiness - NO. I'm determined to get my body back before I go and subject it to a hectic pregnancy again. Battled as it was and don't think my body would cope with another baby and a toddler to boot. We do want another but I'm in no hurry. We've decided we'll think about it again next September. Want to try and plan it so that my last trimester is not over the height of summer, as it was so hot out here and it nearly killed me. Sure the stress of moving my whale of a body around in the heat contributed towards my pre-eclampsia.

quickly logging on from work but feeling a bit naughty about it! It was quite a trial getting ready to go this morning, not much help from dh, but he's on his own otmorrow as I have to get here at 7.30 not 9.30!

Niklas has had quite a few night of wakign for a feed, last night he went from 8-11.30 fed and then woke at 6.30.

He was very happy to be left at the nursery this morning, but has been through phases of getting nervous and upset when I am not around. at the moment he is ok if he is with someone he knows.

everyone is talking about whether or not to have another baby already, I am wondering when my sex drive is going to get back to normal - would like to enjoy it a bit more again before I get pregnant again. it all seems like too much effort at the moment!

Clock watching to see when I can escape to pick up my little darling....

My child is doing something strange at the moment. It started about 3 days ago when eating her dinner. Now today it was for all three meals. She's opening her mouth to eat, but then screwing her face up as if in pain and crying. She'll then stop take another mouthful and go through the whole face screwing, crying bit again. I was thinking it might be her tummy, as sometimes after moaning like that she does a little poo, but now it has started to be every meal. As soon as I take her out of her chair she's totally fine. And she's fine generally during the day. DH wondered if it might be her teeth. Do you think her gums might be sore? She has also woken the last two nights, even though it didn't take much to settle her again. Can't figure out what is making her mizzy at feeding time.

jambot - sounds like teeth to me.

leogaela - I used to log on surreptitiously from work too! Gosh that brings back memories. Will I remember where I've put my brain come January?

Cristina - I remember you talking about your baby who was stillborn when you very first joined us on this thread. What a terrible thing to go through. You seemed to do amazingly well to be so together during your pregnancy with Sylvia.

jambot - gosh - no idea what that could be - iris did cry during a few meals right at the start, whilst also opening her mouth clearly wanting more. Sounds very similar and I still don't know what it was. I thought with her it might be constipation - as she had just started solids and it takes a while for their bodies to adjust to the whole new input.

On the pregnancy front - I feel at the moment I definitely want another, but am happy to wait for a similar gap, so would think about number 3 in a couple of years when I'll be 37. To be honest if I'd started younger and had more money and could give up work I would even contemplate 4, I have just loved parenthood. Well, there are moments when it drives me bats, but the rewards are amazing. Having said all of that, I feel sure right now I want another, but maybe in two years time when I've got a 5 year old and a 2 year old on my hands I might feel like that's hard enough work. In many ways babies are pretty easy and undemanding (the sleepless nights aside!).

i do haveboutsof feeling broody, but atm thats def on the back burner. dh says he would another. like i said further down he is missing out so much on serenas devolopment, so cant blame him. and we always said we wanted 4 kids. but not right now.

serenas crawling is coming on fast. she shot forward so fast yesterday she made herself fall to the side. and i laughed, she looked so shocked.

hi again

BusyW - so sorry to hear it is all going pear-shaped in terms of Harrison's sleeping. As you know I have little advice to offer but just wanted to let you know I am thinking of you and sending some ++++++ sleep vibes your direction.

Jambots - it does sound suspiciously like teeth. Does Lauren have any yet?

Pidge - agree with what you say about babies being so much easier. And my DD1 (3 and a bit) still gives us regular sleepless nights so the baby isn't even worse on that front really. Me, I'm broody as hell but not sure how much of that is because I know DH won't even countenance the idea of another so I get all broody thinking Esther is my last little baby. Probably the hormones swishing around are contributing too. I just seem to be enjoying the baby bit sooooo much more this time around. I think because I realise this time how shortlived it actually is, whereas with DD1 I sincerely thought each stage would last forever (and almost wished them away - "when will she turn over?" when will she crawl?" etc etc etc)

must go to bed, work in the morning and a few feeds yet between now and then methink

Misdee, its really tough that your dh is missing out on so much. I guess dd1 & 2 are also missing him a lot, it really makes my heart and stomach sink to think what you are all going through. Sending you all lots of positive, healthy vibes and hope he improves fast, can come home and that you don't have to wait for long term solutions for him.
I am really nervous to ask this, but did you pass the driving test?

MP, I also think that if I have another baby I will be more relaxed and able to enjoy it more rather than being impatient to see the baby develop as I am with Niklas. I see that with the mums here, the fist time mums are so fascinated with every new thing, but the others are happier to wait. I also think that I won't get so stressed with the difficult bits because I will know that they are just phases and come and go.

Jambot, it sounds like Lauren is having painful teething problems. Niklas is also suffering at the moment, poor darling.

First day at work yesterday was really fine. I have and interesting enough project to get into which makes it worth it (somehow). But sadly Niklas was so tired when I picked him up yesterday that I could hardly feed him, would have loved to have an hour playing with him before he went to bed . It must have been a record as he went to sleep around 7.30!!!! Woke up and fed at 9 and 11.30 then slept through until about 6.30. I had to leave early this morning so didn't have much time with him again ! Roll on Friday then I can cuddle my little boy the whole day !

BW - did you have a better night? Is there somethign disturbing his sleep?

Leogaela - well done on that first day back. The baby exhaustion at the end of a day at nursery will get better - I remember dd1's tired little face greeting me! But after a while they get more used to it and are able to enjoy time with you at the end of the day (though they definitely still get more tired on their days away from you).

MP - will reply to your email in a mo'! Definitely with you on not 'wishing away' each stage with Iris as I was last time.

Misdee - Iris too is sooooo close to crawling, goes up on all fours then lurches forwards and hasn't quite figured out how to move her hands so generally crashes down on her nose, or topples over sideways and looks really surprised!

We had potentially a brilliant night - Iris went through from 7.15 to 5.20am!!! And I'm pretty sure that she only woke up then because dd1 came galumphing up the stairs to ask for a tissue to blow her nose. Drat. Unfortunately Iris wouldn't then go back to sleep, till at 6.15 I climbed into the guest bed with her and fed her into submission. Of course we both then overslept so are now at sixes and sevens with nap and mealtimes. Never mind.

Iris seems a bit constipated - lots of grunting and going red in the face but only a small pellet of hard poo (sorry ladies!). I'm wondering if I'm giving her too much food, but last night she was literally opening her mouth as wide as it would go and grabbing the spoon and shoving it in her mouth when the bowl was empty. So I gave her a bit more and she just wolfed it. I'm sure she would have kept on eating if I hadn't called a stop. Anyway, gave her prune porridge this morning in the hope that would sort her out!!!

I am still off work
I really can't do it....

I had hoped to go back today but here was my evening last night....
7pm harry goes to sleep in cot....wakes at around 7:20 7:55, 8:15, 9:00 and 10:30......feed then and in my bed....wakes at 12:00, 1:25, 3:00, 3:50 ...fed then........5:00...then ds2 wakes at 5:25 bright and breezy.

I just can't do it. I can't do any of the work I have to bring home because my evenings are taken up with settling harry and trying inbetween to sort out all of the crap that needs doing to enable me to actually go to work the next day

+++++++++vibes to you popsycal - you sound like me last week. I know what it is like trying to work after an evening/night like that. I hope it sorts itself out. Is Harry teething do you think?

Oh my goodness popsycal - how awful - you must be shattered. I was wondering how Harry's sleep was, as he was the one here to rival Iris with waking up. But she has really sorted herself out over the last couple of months, and at most now wakes 2-3 times a night, somtimes less. Is Harry's pattern last night typical? If not it might well be teething. It's obviously not hunger if it's that frequent. Does he settle himself to sleep at the start of the evening?