Dec 2007 - Little People, Large Strops

[strandedatseasonsgreetings]

Will this do everyone?

Marking my place, finding it so hard to get on here these days - as well as anything else, I find Mumsnet really slow and/or constantly losing messages at the moment.
Haven't had a chance to do much more than scan the messages but OMG Skid at 999 taking 8 minutes to answer. That is APPALLING! I would have phoned the local newspaper and/or my mp about that!!! So glad ds is ok again, you poor thing, that sounds horrible.
We've been busy with pre-Christmas stuff but I am finding it really stressful. You can tell that dreadful song "I Wish it Could be Christmas Every Day" was written by a man. How many men do ANY of the Christmas organisation? My dh does bugger all. He thinks I am stressing so much to make it a "perfect" Christmas but believe me it won't be perfect - I find I am having to find 25 hours in the day just to make it a half decent Christmas!!!
Sorry for the moan, got that off my chest! Hope you all have lovely, stress-free Christmasses!! xx

I remember your DH is quite anti-Xmas same as mine clara- this is what I find stressful - trying to be all happy excitement while he makes a half-hearted attempt to hide his grimace every time carols/tinsel/Father Christmas is mentioned

Are you hosting? If so that is stressful even with an enthusiastic happy DH, let alone with a miserable old scrooge [bitter], sending you lots of and [sympathy]

I have just finished sorting the Christmas presents to take over to my parent's house in the morning - I can't believe there are so many of them!
I must admit I'm liking the fact this year that we have 2 days to prepare for Christmas day (my work closed on Thur), although mostly I'm preparing to leave for our camping holiday on Boxing Day. The weather here at the moment is glorious - sadly though there is the remnants of a tropical cyclone bearing down on us which looks to make New Year's very wet - I might be sheltering with friends instead of camping at the lovely camping ground we've booked.
However the EQ (again) yesterday in Chch puts all that into perspective and I'm sure we'll have a nice enough holiday regardless of the weather.

I hope those DHs of your's behave skid and clara and that everyone has a very merry and fun Christmas. Only 6 hours to go here!!

Happy Christmas Buzzy - I wonder whether your dd's have woken up yet????
Skid - yes DH is a complete grinch! However it's harder for him to ignore as the girls get older and the excitement gets more infectious....It's just the 4 of us tomorrow, which is nice in one way (eg less stressful) but I do like having some family around. However my parents, younger brother and his family came over yesterday and we had a lovely day - the dd's get on so well with their cousins and we all ate far too much!
Thanks for the (hic) - have one back with a

Happy Christmas!!hope you are all having a wonderful time!!!

Hi all, not sure if you remember me but I've just got a bfp since having DD. Hope everyone's doing well xxx

Yes I remember you, congratulations!! When are you due?

Thabks Kara, August/ Sept fits in perfectly with DD starting school.

How is everyone and their little people?

We're good! I was Bouncingturtle before, btw. I now have a DD who is 6mo, as well as my DS. Can't believe he is starting school next year, better get on an fill in the form!

Hello
Just getting you back on threads I'm on-had no threads left on there which I think is a first for me

Hi ambi and congrats.

Bit of a mixed xmas as my grandad died on the 21st. Then on xmas day in the evening my mum watched strictly on mute as my dad doesn't like it, my dad sat doing the crossword then they both went to bed at 8.30 turning the tv off as they went. I was sat there all alone and felt a bit sorry for myself! Think in a way I'd have felt less lonely if I'd been at home rather than staying with them.

Hello all and happy new year

clairey - really sorry to hear about your grandad. And Christmas doesn't sound great - was your sis in Japan (is she still there?) Hope NYE was more fun?

ambi - hello! yes I remember you - congratulations

clara- hope your DH wasn't too grouchy. Mine wasn't too bad (for him) and we had a really lovely New Year in Edinburgh so he didn't moan too much. When he starts moaning now I start singing, you are the sunshine in my life which shames him into silence (for now)

Stayed with a friend of mine who does autism research and she reckons DS does have autism/aspergers but also [relief] that we can hopefully get some support. She is going to try and pull some strings and get a colleague to assess him immediately so we can know although he will have to be assessed within our county as well but that could take forever

Wierdly sad that DC are back at school - although it's hard work I do like seeing them all day at least when DH is around as well. Sort of miss them, OK just do miss them

Hi everyone and happy new year!
Congratulations Ambi! I certainly remember your name....
Sorry your Christmas was a bit meh! Clairey. Sounds like my NY, although it was me going to bed early as I just don't DO new Year. Stay up until Midnight? Miss two hours of sleep? Just to celebrate a new day...?!
Skidd - DH was actually ok, I think he realised he had to behave. Especially as he was getting a lot of stick at work for being a grouch as well as from me! I still think he thought I went totally over the top (when I really didn't compared to some people..) but he managed to join in a bit. I think he was happiest on the day we pulled down the Christmas decs though.
Do you need to a get an official diagnosis for ds1 before he starts school? If he is diagnosed autistic/aspergers will he get some extra help? One of my friend's older son has autism and went to the school dd1 is at - they were really happy with it and said they got lots of help for him and were really involved. He is now at the local secondary and apparently happy, I think it's helped to have him in mainstream school. I think they got his diagnosis when he should have been in reception, so he started a year later than his contempories.
We had a nice holiday, little day trips and days out and stayed at my parents for two nights over NY. I am quite glad school is back as I have a lot to do but can't get massively motivated. Have a tutorial in a couple of weeks and that usually helps to get me feeling inspired again.
I have been doing a lot of exercise though to try and get rid of the Christmas lbs. I lost 11 lbs on Weight Watchers and running before Christmas, reckon I put on around 4lbs over the holidays so have been doing lots of runs and got a Wii Fit plus for Christmas so trying to do that every day - mostly concentrating on the yoga and muscle workouts to tone up.
Does anyone else have a Wii Fit?
BT - your remark about school places reminded me to ask if everyone had done theirs yet? But apart from you I think the rest of us have older dc's so a school place isn't such a worry for us.

Hello,
everyone gone quiet again!

I have a bit of brain overload at the moment, just loads to do and whereas I'm usually very good at systematically working through stuff and getting it done at the moment I just don't seem to be able to. And then I get annoyed with myself because I normally cope better than this, and I am juggling far less than many people so why am I struggling?? We haven't even sent out the xmas thank yous yet

Clairey - I hear you girlfriend! I'm really struggling too, it's just having put so much off over Christmas and it was a really long break (3 weeks) so now have masses to catch up on. Plus I'm not a single parent like you! As for x'mas thank yous...pah! we've still got to do dd2's birthday thank yous (which will probably now be included in the Christmas notes...)

I have been determinedly decluttering and tidying the house. And being back on the diet!

Hi everyone, happy new year! Sounds like it's been a bit of a mixed bag for you all. Sorry to hear you're feeling blah Clairey.

Skid, that is hard for you. I do hope you get the support you need. Part of you is probably feeling a bit relieved to have a diagnosis but I'm sure what you're mostly feeling is sad.

I can't bear the thought that I have to go back to work on Monday, am so relaxed and into holiday mode. This must be the longest break I've had in 10 years! Also want to do some de-cluttering - tomorrow maybe?

Have just today given DD2 the last of her birthday presents. This must be the most drawn out birthday ever - given we had her party on 3 Dec but we only got back from our travels around the North Island yesterday.
Took her back into childcare today and found no less than 4 birthday party invitations waiting for her .

Hi Ambi :)

Ah yes, birthday thank yous. Afraid I just said thank you to most people when I saw them and the few remaining will get it in with the xmas ones!

Sat down with dd and wrote them all yesterday though so now just need to address and post them...

Also need to crack on with course, redo cv and apply for job as a matter of some urgency. Then I will hopefully have more headspace.

Hope being back at work goes well buzzy, have enjoyed looking at your pictures on fb

what course are you doing clairey?

I also just say thank you in person and send cards only to those we haven't seen - is this bad form [paranoid]?

of your lovely sunny holiday buzzy

Headspace, ah how I would love some headspace... if you manage to get some clairey, will you save me a bit please?

Talking of head space, I have just booked to go on a writer's retreat in Devon - it's a place run by a journalist, they provide your room, all your meals ,etc, - here it sounds perfect! I am going for four nights, I know it's not long, but I want to put together a proposal for a project I would love to get stuck into.....
However I have just written my work plan for my course for the next 18 months and I will have a LOT of essays to write as well!

DD2 driving me a bit spare at the moment following me everywhere. Anyone else got this? If I leave the room for a minute she comes to find me - even if she was happily playing moments earlier. I'm not sure I'd classify it as separation anxiety (surely that's for younger children?!) more that she just WANTS to be with me all the time. I'm at a bit of a loss what to do...

buzzy - DD who is now 6 still does this! In the morning she won't go and get dressed by herself because she'll be "lonely" - I think it is just her personality - she is quite a fearful person generally and has always been very clingy - has you DD2 always been a bit like this or has it suddenly developed

clara - wow sounds amazing - what's the project? Sounds exciting...

Hi Skidd, well I'd say she's always liked to be around me/people but it does seem to have got worse recently. Or maybe it's just that she's become so much more mature recently in so many ways that I have expected her to become more independent and in fact it seems the opposite. So not sure how much is her and how much is me, IYSWIM! It's also true that she's not a risk-taker in general, but that does seem to have improved recently - for example, she's become much more adventurous at the playground recently, more confident on climbing frames etc. But I guess there's a big difference between physical confidence and emotional confidence? Have you noticed asynchronous development in your DD like this?

I agree Clara, it does look WOW! Can I come too?!!

DD1 is in Sydney this week. I have this irrational fear that when I go to pick her up from the airport on Sunday that she won't be on the plane. Also slightly more rational fear that when she comes back she's going to be quite emotionally wrung out for a week or two (almost inevitable I'd say, given this is the first time she's seen him in almost 18 months).

Could it be partly developmental buzzy? DS has been mega mega whingy recently and I've had no idea why but yesterday he stood at the fridge sounding out various 3 letter words dd had written with the magnetic letters and it occurred to me that he's had this massive leap in terms of ability and maybe he's just exhausted from it. It's a vicious cycle though because the more he whines at me the less tolerant I become and the less attention I give him,and then he whinges for attention. Babies go through clingy/crying times when they master something new don't they so I guess it could apply to children too (am clutching at straws a bit but need a reason for the constant whine!)

Good luck with dd1 when she returns, hope it isn't too emotionally gruelling for her. Mine are bad enough when they come back from a weekend with their dad and they see him slightly more often then that!

Retreat looks gooood clara!

Ds gets like this too, Buzzy but I put it down to a bit of jealousy around DD. I hope your DD1 is okay and that she has had a good time with her Dad. It must be so hard for her but at least she has you as the stablising influence in her life.

Clara that retreat sounds lovely! Just what I need. However might have to wait a couple of years when DD stops bfing!

FO _ i am impressed with your DS's letters ability, DS does recognise a few letters but has no real interest in learning letters, he prefers numbers! Some of the kids in his preschool can write their name, is DS falling behind?

Skidd - you have my sympathies, I too am in need of headspace.

And a job - Arise have termed a few agents on the application I was on, so no course forthcoming. Now looking elsewhere!

Clairey I think possibly you're right. She has had a massive leap too recently. Like your DS very interested in words, phonics, counting and adding. Also loads more imaginery play. I noticed yesterday she was doing the same with her Grandma, following her around when we went over to my parents' house. She is quite aware that she's doing it too I think! If I ask her to stop, she will actually do that (for maybe 5 mins) reasonably happily, so I don't really think its about self-confidence.

Sympathies re whining children. There's not many things that wind me up more!! But as you say it's a very hard cycle to get out of.

Well I'm off to have some "free" time this morning :) DD1 arrives back 3pm today from Sydney and meanwhile DD2 is with her father also today - supposed to be picking blueberries, but the weather is forecast to pack in.