Dec 08 Ladies - Waiting for BabyLady & the usual grumpy tots with stinky bots

[DeidreBarlow]

Hope this is ok...

Buy it Avo

Gotta go

So Avo, what's it to be? You are keeping us all in suspenders here!

Ok, at Paddington shortly to leave London. Yes, I have an infected scar but it's superficial and will hopefully be seen off by the ABs I have been given. No abscess yet, thank heavens. And my consultant gave me a nice goodie bag with some baby toiletries in and a couple of treats for me and said I was one of her favourites. Ho!

Feel relieved. About the treatment, not the being a favourite.

Beans, well done on the weight loss even if via illness. That's smashing!

Whilst I remember - Trace, how is your work problem now with the manager and the other lady?

Oh and Beans - how are you finding the coil now?

And I hope Urbane is having a nice rest oop north now.

WG - you did tell us about the scan but still thrilling news! Eek, sorry about the pelvic floor. And the cough. Poor you. When you have had the babe you can do endless kegels and you will soon (ok, eventually) tone it right back up.

I'm still not sure LadyT. We are leaning towards yes but every time I try to settle down with that decision I panic: what if DH dies, what if one of the girls gets sick and I can't afford to take time to care for her, what if I get ill, what if the girls never settle into the state primary and want to send them to a prep at age 7, what if they are emotionally scarred by having a working mother all their lives...

I am so glad you infection is superficial. I am obviously pleased you are your doctor's pet too.

WG, I had a dodgy pelvic floor around 20 weeks with DD2. I obsessively exercised it all day every day and it got a lot better. Then my fantastic midwife called in a fantastic obsterician to sew me up post birth and she sewed up my pelvic floor to strengthen it. Its amazing now! So don't panic.

Doctor's pet! That is funny. Listen, I can only help with the one potential worry - you can definitely get cover whereby the mortgage is paid off or partially paid off if one of you dies. Gloomy topic I know. DP and I are only just sorting out life insurance, actually (indeed it might be cheaper for you to get that instead, for a sum equal to half the mortgage or more). Hey, I am envious of your brand new pelvic floor! Mine is distinctly average so I am doing them every time I feed Dahlia. Or trying to.

Oh yeah, girl who just had the baby is having bf probs as well. Obviously I was next to useless but I put her on to La Leche League as they have a 24hr hotline. Gosh, I hope they are nice. Are they? Anyone know? She'd already called the NCT helpline, apparently they weren't massively helpful. I am hoping the maternity nurse she has got coming will help her.

LLL were very helpful when I had recurrent mastitis. Where does she live? I know of a London BF counsellor who does home visits.

I would also tell her about www.kellymom.com It is an amazing breast feeding resource.

Right, DH has just called, he points out that our work pays out 3x our annual salary if one of us dies in service. We are going to do it ladies!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I am off to call the estate agent.

Hello all, dd starting to stir so can't be long but I miss you all and you're too chatty of late! Sending good sleepy/health/house vibes to all that need them and hope everyone's surviving the cold, central heating on time I think [gas bill doom] and just wanted to say Avo, we have mortgage life insurance and it costs an arm and a leg cos of DH's diabetes, but adviser chappie said it's usually about 1/3 the price we're paying if you're both healthy () so if you're worried it is definitely a possibility for reassurance.

Good for you. Enjoy it!

(She lives in N. London so may well as you about that if she needs it).

Hurray avo!! I think you should go for it too!
We are just sorting out life insurance and long term illness insurance and something else insurance. It seems v pricey to me but i thought everyone
else had it and we were just being v irresponsible. I also get 4x salary for death while at my current job. It's the insurance for if you are long term ill that's the most
pricey though

Good for you Avo :). Sounds like you would regret it if you didn't.

Lady: glad to hear you got to your consultant ok (and without being stuck in the car all morning). It was def worth it for the reassurance as well as the ABs. I hope you listen to us all and REST. Can you take the DDs off to your mum's for a bit if your DP is busy?

Jj: I haven't read back to your news yet but I see the slapped cheek was clear. Phew.

Still not had time to properly post.

But hurrah to the house AVO!.

Lady phew for AB's.

Also Lady I know a fantastic lady in Wanstead who was my doula and is a BF councellor. Also know how to get hold of someone in Nth London if that helps.

Not had a chance to do long PND in friend post . But if you saw someone 31/2 wks post birth and they were still crying all day, not wanting the baby, wishing for their old life, having to put the baby down in another rm while going into another to throw things and scream. Would that be flashing PND to you. Not sure whether to speak to her partner. Am terrified that something awful will happen. What if I dont say anything??? Oh and also her DP proposed to her after the birth and she has ring but wont show it to me, keeps saying it is tiny and generally complaining how it wasnt bought with just his money it was their money.
Sorry all a bit rushed today so prob not explained it very clearly.

This place is awesome. We have the cutest little bungalow by a lake. Tomorrow we will hire some bikes and have a little spin around the safari park if the weather holds out. DS1 went for a little fish on the lake this afternoon. I'm just putting the boys to bed now then going to rustle up a little drinky poo with the martini & bitter lemon they had at the little supermarket here. I've got some fresh lemons and put some water in the ice trays so will see what I can up with.

Avo it all feels a right now. I thought banks made you get life insurance when you take out a mortgage. DH is the king of life insurance we have insurance for both of us as well as cover from DHs work for sickness and life.

Lady the house is in my ideal area, its slightly closer to the city center than we are now, right next to my fav cafe, a really cosy little pub and a nice little park for the boys. Still same distance from the beach and near friends and school. So basically perfect location. Just have to see what it looks like.

Jam that def sounds a risk to me, can you speak to.her partner. If you feel she is a danger to herself or the baby at any point you could contact the Hv team for the area. Trace might have some better advice.

Lady I'm pleased it was just a low grade infection, twas good to get it sorted these things can turn nasty. Now did she say anything about taking it easy, hmm? You know cuddling up with your girls is actually doing something don't you. DD2 needs lots of cuddle time at this stage it helps her development. Believe me, she just teeny tiny for such a short time enjoy it. Oh I miss my boys being teeny tiny, it felt like it lasted about a week and then suddenly DS2 was six months old.

Hello everyone

Very quickly - I am leading a seminar on an area of law I don't know brilliantly on Wed am so I need to get cracking on finishing my prep.....Jam, your pal needs help. I think in the hormone chaos post birth everything can be wrong even though it's right, if you see what I mean, but it sounds a bit more than just feeling a bit down. I'd encourage her to the GP asap.

Beans, I haven't asked DH about the run next week as we had sickness again this weekend (and work) but I will do when he's back tonight. Top news on the weight, well done, hugely envious. WW for me again tomorrow. Wonder if they have a loyalty card?!

My poor Spot, you dear girl, I am sorry things are so rubbish for you. I hope things cheer up soon. It is bloody hard being pregnant and looking after a 2 y old, and if they are having a challenging phase it is even worse. Am rooting fo ryou darling. Lots of love.

Avo, fab on the house! Great stuff. If things do get tough on the cash front, there is always Monday to Friday.com for renting out a room. A pal of mine does this, gets £400 a month for having someone sleep there and make ping meals now and again, so it's always there in the background if you did find things tough for a patch. But 3.25 salary is doable.

Lady, glad the scar is mending. Now please take it easy (or easy for you - that would still equate to a million miles an hour for an old sloth like me)

WG, did your friend get in touch with Julian? how did it go?

Hello Rubes . I am painfully aware that I have been crapola and not made it down to your gaff and met Miss A. Can we try to get something sorted in the next few weeks?

Hello to everyone else, Vag, Summer, JJ, Effie, MOM and anyone else I've missed. Hope all is well. Great news on the slapped cheek JJ too.

Got to dash. Back later.

Oh Spot forgot to.comment.on your sitch. I might say mean things about your DP so I'll just skip him. But with sleep. We have just cut off any milk after bedtime until 5am, then its officially a morning milk. It has been a long road and I think my J is as strong headed as T but slowly but surely it is improving. He no longer needs milk to resettle usually just a little cuddle. We have very good nights and bad nights, but I can feel we are getting there. I wish DS2 would be the three nights and its done sort of boy but like T he gets the teeth thing, right now its def molars. I realise that probably doesn't help but I feel like I'm on top of it now.

Hello everyone,

Just a flying visit, I'll try and catch up properly tomorrow. DD has the squits and is vomiting, and it is rather draining my time and energy!

Please forgive the me post but we had the scan and all looks fine . The quality of the picture was amazing compared to my first scan with DD. DD pointed to the screen and said 'mummy's baby'.

Must go, need to help DH with the tidying. The back room smells of sick...

Love to all.

Hi folks,
Thank you all for your concern and thoughts, it really means a lot to me. You guys were the first people I thought of when I was feeling really upset (not sure how sad that makes me, but hey).

Great news on the scan, Jolly, but so sorry to hear about poorly DD. Clearing up sick is grim and soul destroying (and if you're me, you've always got that 'oh shit there's only one more sheet/pillowcase left' dread). How long has she been sick for?

Veg, I think our boys' stubbornness will stand them in good stead in later life. It's jsut bloody annoying now. We've done two nights no milk, and he still wakes and asks for it but it is taking less time to go back to sleep. Fingers crossed it'll not be too long. But there's some epic dribbling, so I think there's some molar action there too.

It sounds idyllic where you are, what a good find! Will you be posting some pix on FB? Maybe somewhere for us to go when we come to NL (eventually).

Avo, I think it'll all pointing to the dream house, no? I know nothing about life insurance but I'm sure there's something out there that would give you a bit more peace of mind. Have you worked out if it's affordable if (heaven forfend) interest rates climbed to 10%?

Ladypet, so glad you got the care you needed and the infection should be fairly easily brought under control. In answer to your Q about music, no I don't listen to much, though I would like to. Pourquoi?

WG you probably (hopefully) don't remember my woeful tales of a dodgy pelvic floor but I got referred by my MW to a physio as I was getting some coughing/sneezing/laughing/walking leakage issues. I have very boring exercises to do every day but they are already making a difference and I would really recommend them.

Am totally shattered so going to bed now, fingers crossed for a decent night, will make everything else seem more bearable.

Hello,

Completed the mopping so popped back to catch up.

ladyT Eek, I hope the scar improves. I second what trace said about concentrating on getting better.

avo Very exciting news on the house.

Jam I think you do need to try and get your friend some help. Do you know which HV she is under or GP? It is hard to get her help without her blaming you somehow for 'telling tales'.

WG That sounds miserable. I find coughing rather straining these days, I'm sure a chest infection would send my poor pelvic floor over the edge too.

spot Sorry things are rough at the moment. Hope the illness improves and you start getting more sleep.

kiwi Oh dear, another one of us laid up ill. Lots of virtual hot lemon powders for you.

sybil Hope the seminar goes well.

Mom Thank you so much for your kind offer on the dress, it looks lovely. Sizewise, I am a 12 top (34E) and 10 bottom normally, but have shrunk slightly with the sickness. Do you think it might fit? I'd love to try it if you wouldn't mind. I'd pay whatever you want for it!

Right, to bed. I'm bracing myself for another day of unpredictable vomiting and hideous poos.

Cross-posted spot! I've hardly got any clothes left and DD is down to her last few babygrows! She insists on cuddling me after she is sick on herself .

Good news that DS is starting to get the no milk message.

Night all.

How are you this morning, Spot? Was last night any better? DP any less of an arse? Am thinking of you my lovely

LadyT, hope the ABs have kicked in and you are chipper again.

Hello Jolly, good to see you. Hope the hyperemesis is easing off. I wonder how Katie is, too - we've not heard from her for a while. When is her baby due?

Been for a run and SO very slow. Must try harder. DH has given kids breakfast and got them dressed. What has tgot into him? I wonder what he is about to spring on me (another stupid bike ride requiring months of training, no doubt. Hm)

Have a good day everyone.

Morning, Sybs I am so impressed about your run, we're still in pjs and on the firdt tantrum of the day! I think you should be v proud of yourself for having gone on a run at all, never mind the time. I'm a lot better this morning, thanks, cos T slept loads better (hooray!) and DP and i had another talk yesterday which, if not possible to change anything, does mean the air is a little clearer and I think we are able to see each others' sides more.

Sybs let me know when you're next planning a visit chez Rubes as it only took us 55 mins and was lovely and would be great to do it again.

Re-the time out for us, we're going to Cambridge this weekend, dropping T at my mum's and spending the night in a swank hotel so hopefully that will do us good (and not just give us loads of time to argue).

Forgot to say thanks about the chair info Rubes, our current battle is his blatant manipulation. Last night he threw his bib off mid-meal and looked me in the eye and said, "see wee see wee" (which is Show Me Show Me). The implication being, I'll put it back on if you let me watch TV on player. We didn't give it but he's a bloody chancer.

Morning all

DD1 off at nursery, so am having a lovely day with DD2, who is now laughing gorgeously at everything - happy days.

DD1 up in the night a few times with heinous cold, poor love. She is just snot everywhere - again! We only got rid of one a week ago. I guess that's the joys of nursery.

spot - sounds like nights are getting a bit better, which is brilliant.

Off to Battersea Park this pm for a meet up with my lovely friend whose best friend died the night before his wedding a couple of weeks ago - not sure if you all might remember the story. No one still knows quite why, but think it was an underlying heart problem, or else DVT as he'd just got back from Japan. Who knows. Anyway, was thinking about getting her a little present - any ideas? I thought maybe some lovely moituriser or something.

Sybs - hope you can do the run, but not to worry if not possible. I got my number through last night - 22. If only that were my age...

I'm feeling terribly perky today - not sure why as was up rather a lot with DD1 administering calpol and water and hugs, but it's nice.

Kiwi - thinking of you - hope you're up out of your sick bed and all is well with you and that lovely DD of yours.

Rubes - I hope you haven't disappeared off anywhere and will be back to post soon!

Lady - so glad it's just a superficial infection. If only there was none at all, but superficial better than full on one!

Jolly - are you starting to feel any better?

Veggie - poor little J with his teeth. But well done you getting the nighttime milk down to just after 5am - sounds like it's taken hard work, but that it's paid off.

Jam - that does sound quite horrible for your friend - definitely worth speaking to local HV or telling her to go to her GP - perhaps you could go with her?

Right, off for a number 2. That's the best thing about DD1 being at nursery. I can leave DD2 playing on her gym and do one on my own without a little person coming in to discuss poo poos and wee wees with me.

PS Sorry, hope that wasn't TMI! But I do like a bit of peace & quiet!

And Sybs - 2nd spot's impressed with run so early. I refuse to get out of bed early to go for one. tomorrow a friend from NCT and I are looking after each other's little ones as olders are in nursery and taking it in turns to go for a run! Brilliant.

And Spot - cross posted - bloody marvellous about last night being better and that you spoke to DP about it all. WEll done you. xx

How was your night Spot? I hope you got some sleep.

Veggie: catching up, am I right in thinking you have a restaurant where you can send the boys off to play and keep an eye on them while having a civilised conversation? Good lord. Let's all move to the Netherlands. DH and I are lucky if we manage to exchange a sentence without being interrupted while the boys are awake.

Lady: are the ABs kicking in?

Hello Jolly! Sorry to hear about the vomiting. Must be galling to get over the endless sickness yourself only to have DD start.

BTW is it too early yo start thinking about an Xmas meet up of some kind? I can't believe our babies are nearly two.

X-posted cos my phone froze! Sounds like T has turned the corner. Well done for seeing it through despite being knackered and (it seems) doing most of it on your own.

Beans: I am just at the stage where I can declare that I am going to the loo by myself. Even then I get imperious raps on the door.